Don't Say Stop Believin'
by CZeke
Summary: Unless they win at Regionals, the Light Music Club is getting suspended! Can they find a way to turn their despair to glee? ** FINAL CHAPTER UP! After triumph and tragedy at Regionals, hearts are broken, friendships are shattered, and Sawako's job is hanging by a thread. Will anyone manage to find a happy ending?
1. Gives You Hell

None shall know the day or the hour, and Sawako Yamanaka was no exception.

The sound of the bell that day filled her with delight. She'd put in a hard day's work; it was finally time for her sweet reward. She tidied her desk, packed up her things, and headed for the door of the teachers' offices. She had almost made it when the hammer dropped.

"Oh, Sawako," said Principal Yamada, peeking out his office door. "Wait a moment, please."

"Yes, sir?"

"It's nothing important, I just thought I would come with you today. I have a little time and I've been meaning to take a look at this light music club of yours."

Sawako froze solid.

"You seem very happy with these students," continued the principal as he put on his suit coat. "They must be talented. I'd like to hear them play."

_Just leave,_ Sawako told herself. _If you're fast enough, he'll think you didn't hear... no, no, no good. I already answered him. Stupid!_

"Shall we go?" he asked, shutting his office door.

"Certainly!" replied Sawako. "Just follow me."

They walked. Her mind raced. _I'll tell him they're sick! All of them! ...No, dammit, I would have had to do that before we left. Why don't I think of these things faster?_

"Have a good day, Ms. Yamanaka!" shouted a couple of girls on their way home. Principal Yamada nodded approvingly. For such a new teacher, Sawako was doing a remarkable job of earning her students' respect. But then, they were bound to admire such an elegant, proper young lady.

_Kill him! Of course! But where do I stash the body?_ Sawako rubbed her chin thoughtfully.

They walked for a few more minutes. Eventually the principal broke the silence, muttering, "We do seem to be taking the scenic route, don't we, Sawako?"

"Oh! Not at all, sir. We're almost there." A new idea struck; she looked around frantically. "Ah! Here we are!"

The principal raised an eyebrow as Sawako opened the door for him. "That," he said, "is the cafeteria."

"They play here on Tuesdays. Oops! No one's here! I guess they were busy today."

"This is Thursday," said the principal.

Sawako blushed. "Yes, sir."

"I know where my school's music room is, Sawako."

"Yes, sir."

He headed for the stairs. Sawako dashed after him. "Sir! You can't go there! It's not safe!"

"And why not?" he asked, not stopping.

"They're doing all kinds of construction work in the music room! Knocking down walls, pulling out power lines, the works! You'll get hurt!"

"Again," the principal replied, "I would know if construction were taking place in my school."

"Fair enough. But... but the girls play their music loud! Dangerously loud! You can't go in there without a helmet!"

"The _light_ music club does this?"

"It's just a name. These girls are hard rockers! They use nine amplifiers each!"

The principal rolled his eyes. "I'll take the risk."

He was now just a few steps from the door. There was no choice. Sawako dove in front of him, blocking his way.

"Yes, Sawako?"

"I can't let you go in there. You're too important to this school. Let me go in first and make sure it's safe. It may take several minutes."

Principal Yamada glared. "This is becoming ridiculous. I intend to enter the room. Is there _any_ reason I should not?"

Sawako's head spun. _Something! Anything! Diseases! Monsters! Ghosts!_

"No, sir," she conceded. "No plausible reason."

She stepped aside, defeated, and he moved for the door. _There's only one chance left,_ she realized. _Maybe they'll be practicing. I've never seen them start in the first half hour, but there's a first time for everything. Please. Please. Please!_

The principal stepped into the music room. Sawako followed. And in unison, they stopped cold.

"Go, Ricchan! Go for five!"

"You can beat her, Yui! Hang in there!"

In the center of the room, Ritsu and Yui were balancing stacks of cupcakes on their heads.

Yui moaned, "This is too hard!"

"Ha!" laughed Ritsu. "Packing it in already? I told you you were no match for the perfect balance of a master drumme-"

"You're tilting!" warned Tsumugi.

Too late. Ritsu had been too busy taunting Yui to notice. Her cupcakes tumbled off her head and landed, one by one, on the snare drum.

"Aw, no!" Ritsu grabbed the desserts and started wiping the drum off with her sleeve.

"You'd better not have gotten anything on the other instruments," rebuked Azusa. "And we win."

Yui lit up; that hadn't occurred to her yet. "We win, Azu-nyan!" she cheered, and gave a little hop.

Her stack of cupcakes immediately flew from her head, bounced off Azusa's Mustang, and hit the floor.

"Oops."

"AAAAA!" The younger girl panicked, rushing over to check the damage.

Despite losing the contest and seeing so many of her confections ruined, Tsumugi smiled. "You tried your best, Ricchan."

"Thanks. Man, I'm never gonna get this out." The drummer rubbed harder. "Hey, is Mio back with us yet?"

Tsumugi glanced under the table, where Mio, dressed in what appeared to be a female ninja outfit, was dead to the world. "I think it'll be a while," she said.

"Sheesh. Get over it already, Mio. If you didn't want to be Sawa-chan's clothes horse, you shouldn't have grown such big -"

Principal Yamada loudly cleared his throat.

All four conscious club members looked up. Silence fell as they finally noticed the new arrival.

_This is it,_ thought Sawako. _Go for the gold._ She stepped out from behind the principal and shouted, "GIRLS! What are you _doing?_ This is the music room, not a tea shop! Put that junk away and practice!"

Yui perked up. "Ah! Sawa-chan! We got Mio to put on that kunoichi outfit you made! What do you think?"

Sawako feigned horror. "Why would you make the poor girl wear embarrassing clothes?"

"Because you told us to," said Yui, perplexed.

Sawako glanced nervously at her boss. "Uh... heh... what a... kidder?"

To describe Principal Yamada as "not amused" would be like describing outer space as chilly.

* * *

It was quiet in the club room for the next hour or so. Outside, in the hallway, it was much louder. The principal was giving Sawako the dressing-down of her brief career.

The girls had been taking turns listening through the door. So far it didn't sound good. Words like "suspension" were flying.

Ritsu, whose turn it had been, stood up. "I'm not getting much here. Yui, you're on."

Yui saluted. "Aye, captain!" Grabbing an empty cup, she took up position at the door.

_Does the cup actually help?_ wondered Azusa. Once upon a time, she would just have assumed her seniors knew better about these things. Once upon a time.

The drummer paced impatiently. "Anything?"

Listening through the cup, Yui frowned. "I think Sawa-chan is saying it's all our fault."

"Oh, she's been doing that the whole time. Be more specific! Listen harder!"

Yui squinted.

Over at the table, Azusa had been watching in amazement as Tsumugi coaxed Mio out of her stupor with chamomile and soothing words. Against all odds, the bassist was now sitting up and responding to stimuli. Someday Tsumugi was going to be the greatest mother in the world.

Of course, under the circumstances, it might have been more merciful to leave Mio insensate. "What are we going to do?" she lamented. "The principal is sure to take away our club status over this."

"We always knew we might get caught," replied Tsumugi. "We should have been more careful. But let's not assume the worst."

"Not till we have more information!" agreed Ritsu. "Well, Yui?"

"Still blaming us." She paused. "I keep hearing 'Especially Ritsu.' "

The drummer swore under her breath. "If I get expelled over this, I'm sticking three pictures of Death Devil in every locker."

"NO!" shouted Azusa, punching the table and making Tsumugi and Mio jump. "No one's getting expelled! Everything's going to be fine!"

"W-what makes you so sure?" asked Mio.

"He wouldn't have become the principal if he didn't have understanding and compassion for students! He'll give us another chance!"

Ritsu faked wiping a tear from her eye. "Oh, Nakano... your innocence is _so_ touching. I just wanna give you a lollipop or something."

"He _will!_"

"Let's hope so," said Mio, putting a hand on her junior's shoulder. "But let's have a backup plan."

"Hmm," mulled Ritsu. "Do people really get amnesia if you hit them on the head?"

"If they did, you would get amnesia every day, Ricchan," pointed out Tsumugi.

Mio snorted. "No, Ritsu's safe. I always hit her on the forehead, where her armour plating is."

"HEY!"

"I could hit her there all day. Even slam her with a chair or something. She wouldn't feel a thing."

"Oh, we'll see what _you_ feel when -"

"Hold it." Azusa was thinking hard. "Supposing it _is_ true."

"We're not knocking out the principal!" said Mio, aghast.

"But if it _does_ work like on TV, it wouldn't do him any permanent harm. The victim usually just forgets the recent past. Last day or so."

"It doesn't work that way! Tell her, Mugi!"

"We shouldn't try it," said Tsumugi reluctantly. "We would have to hit him in exactly the right spot. It would take a lot of skill."

Azusa sighed. "You're right. If we messed up, we could hurt him pretty badly."

"Hey, that's a risk I'm willing to take!" said Ritsu.

Mio facepalmed. "Why are we still talking about this?"

"I know!" shouted Yui. "Mio, you're a ninja now! Use a jutsu on him!"

"What?"

"Make him forget or fall asleep or something!"

Mio glared. "Dressing up like a ninja doesn't actually make you one."

"You have the power, Mio! Believe it!"

"Oh come _on_! Look at this outfit!" She stood up. "It's _purple_! Stockings, mesh... what kind of ninja dresses like this?"

"A _sexy_ ninja," said Ritsu, because someone had to.

"Enough of this ninja nonsense. We need a _real_ plan. Let's see if Yui's heard anything more." Mio paused. "Wait a minute. Yui, you're over here."

"Hi!"

"Weren't you supposed to be listening to the fight?"

"Oh, it ended a while ago. The principal left. He said something like 'You're on fire.' "

The other four girls shared a look of pure horror.

Ritsu dashed for the door. "Sawa-chan!" she shouted. "It's gonna be okay! Don't do anything crazy!"

She flung the door open. Sawako was still there... in body, but not in spirit. Her skin was pale, her eyes empty. She looked like she'd just been drained of her blood by a vampire.

"Uh, Mugi?" said Ritsu. "We're gonna need some serious tea here."

* * *

It had taken a lot of help, up to and including lifting the teacup to her mouth, but Sawako finally had most of her colour back now. Tsumugi had broken out her _special_ tea for this job. The mere scent of it was enough to make the band feel like they could play the Rolling Stones' entire discography while running a marathon.

As Tsumugi tended to their teacher, the others stared at the teapot in awe and terror. "I'm going to try it," whispered Yui.

"Be careful," Azusa warned.

Ritsu poured a bit of the new tea in Yui's cup. "You're a brave woman. We will remember you fondly."

Taking a deep breath, Yui drank the tea. She was completely silent for a long moment.

"Yui? Are you okay?" asked Mio nervously.

A tear came to Yui's eye as she stared straight ahead. "I can SEE GOD," she announced.

"Uh..."

"Hi, Mr. God. Thanks for Ui and Giita."

Ritsu pushed the teapot away like it was going to bite her. "I'm not touching that stuff. It should be a controlled substance."

"It contains several," noted Tsumugi, who nobody had realized was listening.

"Girls," said Sawako, "we have a problem."

The band perked up. "Teacher!" said Azusa. "Are you okay now?"

"Okay?" Sawako laughed bitterly. "We ain't _none_ of us okay."

"Were you fired?" asked Ritsu bluntly, earning a disapproving look from Mio.

"No, Ritsu. I wasn't fired." She sighed. "Not _yet_."

"Has our club been suspended?" asked Tsumugi.

"Same answer. Not yet. We're on the bubble, girls."

Mio stared. "The... bubble?"

"Oh, I'm _sorry_," said Sawako with utter scorn. "You're afraid of bubbles, right? You've got so many stupid phobias I lose track."

"Hey!"

"Yeah, lay off Mio!" said Ritsu, putting an arm around her friend. "She's not afraid of bubbles. She's afraid of _barnacles_. And _skulls_. And _blood_. Her nightmare wouldn't involve bubbles. Just lots of _barnacle-encrusted skulls_ that would just keep BITING her until -"

"For the love of God, Ritsu!" yelled Azusa. She pointed at the quivering mass that had until recently been Mio.

"Oh. Heh. Um, sorry, Mio. That was only half on purpose."

A bit nervous about taking the liberty, Azusa patted her senior on the head. "There, there. Everything's okay."

"...B-biting..." whispered Mio.

Sawako grunted. "You people are so tedious. Do you want to know the situation or not?"

Even Tsumugi was visibly startled at the teacher's gruffness. The "real" Sawako was bad enough, but this was full metal Sawako. Whatever the principal had told her, it had been ugly.

_No sense delaying the inevitable,_ thought Ritsu. "We're ready, Sawa-chan. Lay it on us."

"I told Principal Yamada the truth," she explained. "I told him that the five of you have natural talent, and I didn't want to quash it by putting you on some regimented schedule or banning your tea and treats."

"But you _offered_ to do that, right?"

Sawako glared. "Azusa..."

"Sorry." The junior student sighed; if a genie had offered her three wishes for the club, regimented-schedule would have been the first, and she would have thought hard about making no-tea-and-treats-in-the-club-room number two.

"I explained all that to him," continued the teacher, "and he listened. He believes me... but he wants proof."

"No problem!" said Ritsu. "Mugi, make him some pudding!"

Everyone stared.

"See, the proof is in the... oh, forget it."

"If I can _finish_," said Sawako, "he wants a demonstration that this club is accomplishing something. So he's sending us... to Regionals."

Azusa's eyes went wide. "_Regionals?_"

"What's that?" asked Ritsu.

Her junior frowned in disappointment. "What kind of high school musician are you? Regionals are _Regionals_! They're the biggest deal in the region!"

"Oh. Then shouldn't we have been going already?"

"Mio and I have been bugging you about it for weeks! Right, Mio?"

"...Blood...blood everywhere..."

"Oh, for Pete's..." Azusa grabbed Yui's cup of tea and held it under the bassist's nose. She leapt three feet into the air.

"Wow," she said, conscious but shaking. "Mugi, where did you _get_ that stuff?"

The rich girl just smiled mysteriously. Ritsu got the distinct impression that if she told them, she would have to kill them.

"And did I hear someone say we're going to Regionals?" asked Mio.

"Yep. Apparently they're a big deal."

"Of _course_ they're a big deal!" scolded Azusa. "They're... they're _regional!_"

"Well, good." Mio managed to smile. "It'll be our first chance to compete with other groups. Think of it as Round 1 of Budokan. It'll be fun!"

Sawako laughed bitterly. "Oh, you're not having _fun_ with this, girls. You're fighting for your lives. You're in it for blood!"

"Shh!" hissed Azusa.

She needn't have worried; Mio was more concerned about what Sawako was saying than what words she chose. "What do you mean, fighting for our lives?"

"You don't just have to play at Regionals - you have to _win_. That's the test. If you lose, it proves to Principal Yamada that I'm wrong about your talent. Then you lose the club... and my position at this school gets 'renegotiated'."

There was a moment of silence while the ultimatum sank in.

"Hey Mio," said Ritsu, "what's the competition like at Regionals?"

She hesitated. "Well... I watched last year's finals on TV. You know that band you've been into lately, SentriFUJE? The ones who went platinum with their first album and did a private concert for the Emperor?"

Ritsu gulped. "They were last year's winners?"

"No. They came in third."

"...Well, this was a nice club while it lasted."

"We can't give up!" cried Tsumugi. "Ms. Sawako's career depends on us!"

"Good point. Hey Sawa-chan, how are ya at flipping burgers?"

"I do host a mean barbe- HEY! Are you saying that I wouldn't even be able to get another teaching job? That I'm only suited for menial labour?"

"Saying? No." Ritsu liked to maintain plausible deniability.

"It won't come to that!" Tsumugi pressed, horrified at the image of her teacher being doomed to serve fast food involuntarily all her life. "We can win at Regionals! We'll practice until no one can beat us!"

"What about our school work?" worried Mio. "Exams are only a year away, and we have this year's tests too. We can't devote ourselves completely to -"

A soft click interrupted her. The sound filled all the girls' hearts with dread. They turned, hoping it had been something else. Something other than...

...Sawako setting her glasses down on the table. "Oh, you _will_ win at Regionals," she declared with a wicked grin. "I have a _plan_."

In the dead silence, Mio, Ritsu, Azusa, and Tsumugi felt a chill that froze their very souls.

Yui laughed out loud.

"W-what was that for?" asked the startled Azusa.

"Oh, sorry," she said. "God told a joke."

Ritsu glanced at the blazing eyes of their teacher and muttered to Mio, "I think we're the punchline."

* * *

**Next: Tokens of Esteem**

(A/N: This takes place about halfway through second year. The anime skipped through that year pretty fast; I'm taking a little comic license to squeeze this in. Any resemblance to popular TV shows is all in your mind.) 


	2. Don't Make Me Over

"The world," announced Sawako the next day, "loves an underdog."

She paused for dramatic effect. The club members waited, trying to hide their nervousness. As far as they could tell, Sawako hadn't even _brought_ the glasses this time.

"Now, you're underdogs already because you never practice. But the audience and judges won't know that. Or at least they'd _damn well better not_."

All five girls shrank back from her glare. Azusa had to fight the urge to dig a hole and hide in it.

"But Regionals are only a month away, and even if you practice nonstop, you won't legitimately be the best band there. You're good, but not _that_ good. So we need to score you some sympathy points — give you a little boost."

"How do we do that?" asked Mio.

"We're going to create the impression of certain... weaknesses. The kind that _aren't_ your own stupid fault. The kind people will sympathize with. We're going to make you a scrappy team of misfits — a heartwarming feel-good movie that just begs for a happy ending."

"Isn't that sort of like cheating?" asked Ritsu.

"Not at all. I have no intention of bribing the judges."

"That's just one _kind_ of cheating."

"Right, and we're not doing it. Does that answer your question?"

Ritsu scratched her head. "...Yes?"

"Glad we got that settled. Now, as I was saying, you need weaknesses. The trick is to pick the right ones. They have to be obvious, but they can't actually impair you. We can't use Mio's shyness, for instance — it's only visible when she's panicking, and then she couldn't play."

"Heh heh." Ritsu elbowed Mio in the ribs.

"For the same reason, we can't use Ritsu's stupidity."

"HEY!"

Azusa fought to stifle a laugh and failed. Sawako immediately added, "Or Azusa's pushy attitude, naivete, and general stick-in-the-mudness." The junior student curled into fetal position.

Yui frowned. "Don't be mean to Azu-nyan."

The teacher gave her a withering glare. "Oh, don't get me _started_ on you."

"All right, we get the idea," said Mio. "What kind of 'weaknesses' do you have in mind instead?"

"Glad you asked!" Sawako made a grand gesture toward the drum set. "What do you... um..."

Sawako stared at Tsumugi. The rich girl was leaning so far forward she was in danger of falling over. Her hands were held up to her chest in fists, her face eager and determined.

_She wants me to insult her too, doesn't she?_ asked Sawako with a look. Mio and Ritsu both nodded.

"We also can't use Tsumugi's... um... blondeness," the teacher finished lamely. Apparently it was enough to satisfy Tsumugi; she sat back in her seat with a pleasant smile.

"So about the drums," said Ritsu.

"Right! Notice anything different?"

The drummer took a good look. "Not really. Seems about normal. I mean, somebody switched my regular chair with a wheelchair, but besides that..."

"Exactly! That's your gimmick! You're handicapped!"

Ritsu's eyes went wide. "You're not serious, are you?"

"You bet I am!"

"This... this is..."

The other four braced themselves for an epic squabble.

"...This is _totally awesome!_"

Mio blinked. "What?"

"I've always wanted one of these!" Ritsu hopped in the chair and started driving it around. "Everyone will have to get out of my way now!"

"Now wait a minute here!" cried Mio, following Ritsu. "You can't just suddenly be in a wheelchair! There's nothing wrong with you!"

"Ah," said Sawako, "but that's what _these_ are for!" She picked up two mysterious white objects that had been leaning against the wall.

"Those are _big_ goalie sticks," said Yui, impressed.

The teacher rolled her eyes. "They're fake casts. Ritsu is wearing these from now on, and no one will wonder why she needs a wheelchair."

Azusa turned that one over in her head. "Wouldn't that defeat the purpose? A temporary injury isn't the same thing as a handicap."

"Oh, close enough," said Sawako, opening one of the casts. "All we need is sympathy points. Get over here and try them on, Ritsu."

The drummer wheeled over. "Do I really need both?"

"Sorry. If it were just one, you could still get around on crutches."

"Does this at least get me out of tests?"

"You bet it does! In your sweet, sweet dreams."

Ritsu sighed and took the first cast from Sawako. She clapped it around her leg; to her surprise, it fit snugly. "How did you — oh. Of _course_ you have my measurements."

Yui whipped out a pen and started signing the cast. "I've always wanted to do this!"

"So you've been rooting for one of us to break something," muttered Ritsu. She looked closer at the signature. "Yui, why does this say 'Hiru Yuisawa'?"

"It's a _fake_ cast," she explained.

Tsumugi was clearly thrilled with the idea. "May I sign too, Ricchan?"

"Sure, why not? Make it a party. Hey Mio, you in?"

"This is _insane!_" shouted Mio. "You can't seriously be planning to fake two broken legs! It's offensive! It's _stupid!_"

Sawako laughed. "It can't be offensive if nobody finds out."

"_Everyone_ will find out! How is Ritsu supposed to have gotten this 'injury'?"

"Jumped off a roof thinking she could fly."

Ritsu glared. "If that's the best you can do, I'll come up with my own."

"What about her family?" continued Mio. "The hospital would have called them!"

"Obviously she won't wear this stuff at home," said Sawako. "She can store it all somewhere between home and school. They'll never find out."

"Oh yeah? What if her brother has friends who go to this school?"

The drummer waved the objection off. "Satoshi's just a kid. He still thinks girls will damage his nanomachines or something."

Yui punched her palm. "Time out!"

"What?"

"If Ricchan got sick the day of a concert, Satoshi might dress up like her and take her place, like Ui did for me! Then he would find out!"

Everyone stared. "...There are so many things wrong with that idea," said Ritsu.

"Really?"

"One, Satoshi's like half my size. Two, he can't play drums. Three, he'd never even get the idea — only your sister's that crazy. Four, he knows I'd kick his butt if he tried. And five... how would he see me in a wheelchair at school if he was _taking my place?_"

Yui thought it over. "Time in," she said.

Sawako smirked. "That's Ritsu sorted out. Who wants to go next?"

Mio went pale. "You have schemes for _all_ of us?"

"Do Azu-nyan next!" said Yui, earning a skunk-eye from her junior. "What? I'm interested."

"Ah yes, little Azusa," said Sawako. "You tan easy, don't you?"

"Well, yes..."

The teacher raised an eyebrow.

"I'm not sure what... what you're..." She leapt to her feet. "Oh my GOD!"

"You can't be serious!" agreed Mio.

"What?" asked Yui.

"No! I can't do it, Teacher! That's just wrong!"

"Wow, Sawa-chan," said Ritsu. "I didn't think you could top mine."

"What? What's her idea?" Yui looked around.

"I mean, seriously! _Seriously!_"

"You're making this sound much worse than it is," said Sawako. "I'm not suggesting you actually _claim_ to be a foreigner. I'm just saying to get a nice dark tan and let people draw their own conclusions."

"You called these things _weaknesses_! Being foreign isn't a weakness!"

"Poor choice of words, maybe. Would you prefer disadvantages?"

"That's just as bad!"

"Oh?" Sawako shot her a stare. "Are you really claiming that foreigners aren't at a disadvantage in this country? Do you see a lot of them at this school? In this city? It's no secret that Japan isn't the most welcoming place on Earth."

"But..."

"All you need to do for your sympathy points is get a little sun. We should all be so lucky."

Azusa steeled herself. "I'm sorry, Teacher, but I can't follow this order. It's just too... awful."

"Well, that's all right," said Sawako. "We can go with my backup plan. C'mere and I'll tell you what it is."

The junior student came up to listen. Then she began turning purple as her teacher whispered the backup plan in her ear.

"So? Whattaya think?"

"Tanning is fine," she squeaked out.

"Really? You don't think it's too _awful_?"

"No. It's good. Let's do that."

She sat back down next to the still-baffled Yui, who said, "Azu-nyan, do you know your hair is standing up?"

"Who's next?" asked Sawako.

Tsumugi practically leapt up in excitement. "Me! Me, please!"

"Ah yes." Sawako looked the rich girl over. "Yep, it'll work. I have a great one for you, Tsumugi. Come see me later and I'll explain it to you."

Her face fell. "Why not now?"

Sawako glanced nervously at Mio and Ritsu. "Er... let's say I want this one to be a surprise for the others."

Ritsu narrowed her eyes. "This is something we'd never let you do in a million years, isn't it?"

"Maybe."

Mio and Azusa shared a look. They both had the same thought: _What could possibly be worse than what we've seen so far?_ Then they shuddered, realizing that if there _was_ something, their teacher would definitely be the one to come up with it.

"Next, Yui. I gave this one a lot of thought. More thought than Yui herself has given anything in her life."

Yui drooped. "I miss the fake Sawa-chan."

"What do we know about Yui? She can't read sheet music. She misses things that are right in front of her nose. She needs a full-time helper at home and various caretakers at school. On the other hand, her sense of pitch is unusually acute, and we all know how important taste is to her."

"And I can't snap my fingers," added Yui. "Hey, let's make that my gimmick!"

"Don't interrupt my chain of logical reasoning," said Sawako. "I was building up to something very specific."

"But I don't see —"

"Exactly." Sawako grinned. "You're _blind_!"

* * *

"AAAAAAA!"

Nodoka stopped walking. "Ui? What's wrong?"

"I... I think something happened to Big Sis! Something terrible!"

_Oh, great. This again._ "All right, try to relax. I'm sure Yui is fine."

"I've got to go find her!"

"She's with her club, remember? They'll call if anything's wrong."

"But... but she..."

"Ui, the last time you got one of these feelings, Yui had only poked herself with a pencil."

"Don't remind me!" she cried. "...I still have the scar..."

"Come on, let's go back to your house and wait for her. I'll make you some tea." Nodoka knew full well that Ui would end up making _her_ tea, but it was polite to at least offer.

"O...okay." Ui let Nodoka help her up, and they walked home without further incident.

Not until the next day did it occur to Nodoka to wonder... _SHE still has the scar?_

* * *

"Blind? Ricchan, she says I'm blind! How did I never notice?"

"Because you're _blind_."

"Not literally blind, of course," Sawako clarified. "More like... mentally blind. But it's a short enough step."

"That's not a short step at all!" said Azusa.

"Let me demonstrate, O ye of little faith." Sawako took a bandana from her pocket. "Yui, come here for a minute."

She did. Sawako folded the bandana and tied it around the guitarist's head, covering her eyes completely.

"How does that feel?"

"Soft!"

"Glad you're comfortable. Can you see anything?"

"Just a bandana."

"Right. Now go pick up your guitar."

Without hesitation, Yui walked around the couch and made her way to where the instruments were set up. She triumphantly grabbed her guitar from its stand.

Azusa's jaw dropped. Her senior hadn't stumbled even once. "Yui, that was amazing!"

"Huh," said Ritsu. "How'dja do that?"

"Giita and I will always find each other," Yui announced with deep conviction. Mio actually saw Tsumugi wipe a tear from her eye.

"Okay, Yui, now play something," said Sawako.

"Hmm." The guitarist thought. "Oh, I know! Hey Mugi, I spy with my little —"

"She meant play a _song_!" said Azusa.

"Bad Azu-nyan," Yui scolded. "I was trying to let Mugi be the straight man."

"What?" Azusa turned to see the rich girl slumping. "Uh, sorry. It's kind of hard to tell when Yui's... well, never mind."

Sawako frowned impatiently. "I'll be more specific. Let's hear 'Fluffy Fluffy Time'. Ready?"

"One sec." Yui strummed, keeping her hand off the frets, and listened carefully to the "chord" that resulted. "E, A, D, G, B, E. Okay. Here goes!"

Azusa raised both eyebrows — _She can tune like that?_ Sawako, correctly guessing what was in the junior's head, smirked and told her, "Pay attention. You might learn something."

Yui got through the intro without a hitch. She started singing at the right time. She never paused to remember the words or the chords. She even played around a bit during the bridge without losing the tune.

Ritsu tapped her fingers. Mio started nodding. Moments like this were when they knew they'd been right to push Yui into joining up. For five golden minutes, a high school music room became a little slice of rock heaven.

At last, Yui wrapped up. Sawako grinned as the final chord reverberated. Her point was made.

"That was amazing, Yui!" said Tsumugi.

Ritsu gave a thumbs-up. "Vintage Hirasawa!"

"Thanks!" She put Giita back on its stand.

Azusa had a look of dull shock. "Yui, that... that was..."

The guitarist practically hopped with anticipation.

"...That was 'Curry With Rice'."

Her face fell. "Oh. It was?"

"Yeah. But you sure played it well."

"You can take the blindfold off now," said Sawako. "Come on back."

Yui did so. On the way, she tripped over the couch.

"All right, maybe she doesn't need to see to play guitar," conceded Mio. "But what about school?"

"Well," said Sawako, "most blind people have dogs to help them. Yui is lucky; she doesn't need one. She has Ui."

"You think Ui will want to be Yui's dog?" said Ritsu. Then she, and everyone else in the room but Yui, went very quiet for a moment as the obvious answer came to them. Ritsu shuddered, sorry she'd asked.

"...Anyway, they'll stick together from now on," explained Sawako. "Ui will help Yui get around, take notes for her, and so on. She'll be a temporary member of Yui's class."

"But I'm a second-year!" said Yui. "Ui can't do my work!"

Sawako stared. "I hate to break it to you, Yui, but your sister is _much_ smarter than you."

"That can't be right. I've asked her before, and she says she's not."

Everyone sighed — except Tsumugi, who always found Ui's devotion heartwarming.

"I suppose you have an explanation for this sudden 'blindness' lined up..." Mio said to Sawako.

"Jumped off a roof thinking she could fly."

Yui blinked. "Isn't that Ricchan's accident?"

"It was. Now she was just walking by at the time. You landed on her."

"Oh, and she broke my legs with her _eyes_?" Ritsu protested.

"Funny things happen in accidents. Trust me, this will work. And after we win at Regionals, you'll both 'recover'."

"Should I wear anything different?" asked Yui. "What do blind people look like?"

Ritsu smirked. "Don't ask _them_. They don't know."

"Why not?"

The drummer stared at her. "Because... because blind people don't make reflections in mirrors."

"Oh! Like vampires! I'll wear my fan—"

"Stop that, Ritsu," said Sawako. "Yui, you'll dress normally, you'll just have a cane. And dark glasses... unless you prefer the Little Orphan Annie look."

"Would I get my own Daddy Warbucks?"

"You have one already," said Ritsu, cocking her head at Tsumugi. If the blonde noticed, she didn't react.

"And that just leaves... _Mio_," Sawako declared.

"No," replied the bassist.

"Hey, you haven't even heard —"

"It doesn't matter. I'm not doing it. Nothing embarrassing, nothing disgusting, nothing fraudulent. I'll put up with the others' gimmicks, but I draw the line at doing one myself."

"Not even —"

"No."

"HEY!" Sawako stepped closer to Mio, enough to loom a bit, and hit her with the full force of her death-stare. "You gonna keep INTERRUPTING, or can I talk?"

"G-go ahead!" Mio had given it her best shot, but now her bravado failed her. Standing up to Sawako was one thing — facing Catherine was another.

"Tell you what," said Sawako. "You're not sitting this out, but I'll give the choice to you. I'll tell you my ideas and we'll find one you're willing to do."

"O-okay. That sounds fair."

"Let's see." Sawako took a list from her pocket. "Suppose you had a delusion that you were really a magical girl."

"I don't think so."

"What about compulsive stuttering?"

"No."

"Exhibitionism?"

"No!"

"Hmm..."

* * *

25 minutes later, Yui and Azusa were both asleep, Tsumugi was making a third pot of tea, and Ritsu was staring at the ceiling, wondering if it was possible for a human to get so bored she spontaneously exploded.

"Okay, just like your normal self except you can't pronounce the letter G."

"No."

"Uh... pink hair. Because of radiation."

"No."

"Hmm... oh! This is a good one! What if you were left-handed?"

"I _am_ left-handed."

"Really? No good then. If I've never noticed, it's too subtle." Sawako flipped through the pages of her list. "I'm telling you, Mio, you're wearing me out. Not _one_ of these ideas has been acceptable to you?"

"Sorry."

She sat still, pondering. "I wonder... there's always _my_ trick..."

"What?"

"Let's see how it looks. Try these on." The teacher handed Mio a glasses case.

She opened it and gave a start. These were no ordinary glasses. They were _those_ glasses — the ones that kept Sawako's true self hidden. She looked at them skeptically. "How can I wear these? They're made to your prescription..."

"Humour me."

She did. "What the —? I can see perfectly!"

"They're not real. I only wear them to create an image."

Ritsu raised an eyebrow. "Sawa-chan, are you Superman?"

"Up, up, and away!" cheered Tsumugi.

The teacher glared at them both. "The important thing, Mio, is that glasses give an impression — just a little one — of being shy and weak. It's not much, but it's worth a point or two. Can you live with that as your gimmick?"

"I... I guess so. It's better than the others."

"Good. Keep those for now. I expect to see you wearing them whenever you're at school."

"But don't you need them yourself?" asked Tsumugi.

"I'll take them back when this is all over. Until then, we're in _serious_ mode, and I'm not letting you girls forget it. You'll see Regionals every time you look in my eyes."

"I always see eternal damnation in your eyes," said Ritsu. "Is that close enough?"

She glared at Ritsu, who jumped back, shouting "Ow! It burns!"

By now the smell of tea had woken Azusa up. It took her several seconds to realize she had cozied up to Yui in her sleep. She hurriedly disengaged herself and glanced around to see if anyone had noticed. Didn't look like it, though something about Tsumugi's smile made her wonder.

"Welcome back," said Sawako. "Wake up Yui too, would you? We're nearly done for today."

_Finally,_ thought the guitarist. She gave her senior a gentle nudge. "Yui..."

No reaction. "You'll need more force than that," said Mio.

The idea clearly made Azusa uncomfortable. She gave another nudge, ever so slightly harder, and then nervously jumped back. Still nothing.

Mio smiled; Azusa's respect was sweet, if painfully misplaced. "Like this," she said, and shoved Yui in the shoulder.

The guitarist bolted awake, shouting "Stop the octopus!"

"We'll get right on that," said Ritsu. Tsumugi giggled.

Rubbing her eyes, Yui emerged from the dream world. "Oh! Mio! You're wearing glasses again!"

"Again?" asked Azusa, who'd just noticed herself.

"I've never worn glasses before," said Mio.

Yui stared. "Are you sure? I remember seeing you in them once."

"I don't think so."

"You tipped them forward and gave a little wink."

"Okay, I _definitely_ didn't —"

"I think it was the same day I took a big bite out of Ricchan's ice cream cone."

"Hey!" shouted Ritsu. "I forgot you did that! You're gonna pay, you maniac!"

"And Azu-nyan met another ki—"

"Are you _quite_ done?" interrupted Sawako. All five girls clammed up and paid attention.

"So you all have your gimmicks now. But listen... I don't want you getting the wrong idea from this. I'm not telling you you're not good enough on your own."

"You're not?" said Azusa.

"No. _I_ know how good you girls are. You have the potential to go as far as you want. I'm only setting you up like this because not everyone has the vantage point that I do. To the rest of the world, you're just another band.

"I'm doing my best to give you a little edge — something to serve the same purpose in other people's minds that my time spent with you does. I make allowances for your inexperience. With this, the judges will have something to make allowances for. But don't let that shake your confidence. I believe in you, and you should too."

By now all the girls' eyes were misty. _So the real Sawa-chan is still in there,_ thought Mio. "Teacher, that was —"

"But if you screw up and get me fired, I promise I will _eat you alive._"

Silence fell.

"I will barbecue you on a propane grill. I will destroy all record of your existence. I will impale your heads on spears and stick them on my lawn as a warning to all who cross me. And if your families complain... have you seen _Saw_?"

They shook their heads.

"That's probably for the best. In conclusion, mess this up and people in Hell will feel sorry for you. They will hold bake sales to raise hell-money for your benefit. You will forever be —"

HONK. HONNNNK.

"Ack! I'm late!" Sawako packed her bag hastily and scampered for the door. "Okay, see you girls on Monday with your gimmicks. Have a nice weekend!"

There was a brief pause in the teacher's wake, as the band processed what they'd heard. Then Mio and Ritsu bolted for the window to see where Sawako was going.

"Azu-nyan," said Yui, "how could she erase all record of us if our heads were right there on her lawn?" The younger girl shrugged.

"There!" Ritsu pointed out the window. "She's heading for that car!"

"Shh, she'll hear us!" said Mio, pulling her friend's arm back inside.

"Is that a man in the driver's seat?"

Before Ritsu had even finished her sentence, Tsumugi was behind them, craning her neck to see. "You're right, Ricchan!"

The drummer whistled. "He looks _rich_. And what kind of car is that, a Rolls?"

"Don't all cars roll?" asked Yui, popping up between Ritsu and Mio.

"He's probably just a friend," cautioned Azusa. But she too was trying to get a good look.

Sawako had now reached the car. The driver was leaning out the window to meet her. She brought her head down and —

"I have a feeling they're not just friends, Azusa," said Mio, red-faced.

Ritsu whistled again. "That boy's got _style_. I want one."

"Go, Sawa-chan!" said Yui.

As the adults finally broke the kiss, Azusa was surprised to realize Tsumugi hadn't weighed in. She snuck a look at the rich girl, but her expression was unreadable.

"Wow," said Ritsu as the car drove off. "Our Sawa-chan with a boyfriend. For reals."

"Do you think it's a good or a bad thing?" asked Azusa.

"Good!" said Mio. "This will keep her from torturing us too much. Nothing is a bigger distraction than romance."

Tsumugi spun on her, yelled "And how would _you_ know?", and stomped out of the room.

All four girls stared after her in shock.

"Wow," said Yui. "What was that about?"

"So Mugi's finally snapped," said Ritsu, rubbing her chin. "It had to happen sooner or later."

Azusa sighed. "She's probably just tired. It's been a long day. I wouldn't take it personally, Mio."

The advice was necessary. Mio looked like she'd just been mugged by Santa Claus.

"Weird," said Ritsu. "Well, let's head home."

"Oh no you don't!" replied Mio, jolted out of her stupor by the suggestion. "We haven't practiced yet! You heard all those threats! From now on we don't miss a single day!"

"Oh, fine. Lemme just take a pit stop first." Ritsu wheeled herself over to the door, which Tsumugi had failed to close behind her for the first time ever.

The others began setting up their instruments. After a minute, Ritsu popped back through the door.

"Uh, which way to the elevator?"

* * *

Meanwhile, across town, two volunteers were finishing up the preliminary paperwork for this year's Regionals.

"Have we got all the application forms now?" asked Tarou, picking up a stack of papers.

"Yep," said Kimiko. "The deadline was noon today. Anyone who's not in that stack is out of luck."

"I'll start entering the data, then."

Tarou headed for the door, but stopped halfway. Marshalling his courage, he spun around again. "Kimiko!"

"Yes?"

"Will you come to karaoke with me after work today?"

She raised an eyebrow. "Are you asking me on a date?"

"N-no! I just, uh, I think you probably sing well!"

"Oh? That's too bad. If it had been a date, I might have said yes."

"Okay. Sorry. Wait, what?"

As they talked, neither of them noticed the lone, just-barely-on-time application form that had slipped off the stack when Tarou suddenly turned. It drifted to the floor like a dying dream, finally sliding underneath a filing cabinet, where it would be found and disposed of by the janitor the next morning.

The name on that form read "Verbena Academy Jazz Quintet."

The Sakuragaoka High School Light Music Club's form, of course, was safe and sound at the bottom of Ritsu's desk drawer.

* * *

**Next: Lies, Spies, and Alibis**

(A/N: Remember, this is before Season 2's "Let's stalk Sawa-chan" episode. I deny all knowledge of in-jokes about other fics in this chapter. And Glee? Never heard of it.)


	3. Defying Gravity

Dawn hadn't quite broken, but Sawako was already at school — with Tsumugi, whom she'd asked to come in early for a special meeting.

"So that's my idea for your gimmick," finished Sawako. "Now be honest — would doing this upset you? If so, I'll understand."

Tsumugi was silent. Sawako could see her eyes starting to well up with tears.

_Uh oh,_ the teacher thought. "I'm sorry! I won't make you do it. Forget I even —"

The blonde shook her head firmly. "I'm... I'm just so happy..."

"Oh." _Whew._

"This is something I never even dreamed could happen. I've never been so touched..." She rubbed the tears from her eyes. "Of course I'll do it, Teacher! It will be an honour!"

In every life, there are key points of decision — moments when our future hinges on the choice we make. Sawako didn't realize it, but she had just hit one of those moments.

She could tell that something about Tsumugi's reaction was... off. The girl was far too enthusiastic about a proposal that would have outraged Ritsu and sent Mio screaming from the room. Sawako wondered if she should ask Tsumugi why she was so excited.

She chose not to look a gift horse in the mouth. She would regret it.

"When can I start?" asked Tsumugi eagerly.

"Not for a couple of days. We need to do this gradually. In the meantime, there's something else you can start on."

Tsumugi patted the large carrying case beside her. "Is it related to your request that I bring this?"

"Exactly. Here's how it's going to work..."

* * *

Mio watched as Ritsu vanished into the clubhouse. "I can't believe this is still here," she said.

"Of course it is!" Ritsu called back. "We got that lock for the door, remember?"

"Not the chair. The clubhouse. We used to play here what, ten years ago? It still looks just the same."

Ritsu emerged, decked out in her wheelchair and casts. "I guess there aren't any kids the right age around here. Or maybe we left a little of our spirits behind and they've been hauntin' the place. Wooooo..."

"Stop that!" Mio wrapped her long black coat a bit tighter around herself.

"Ha! Why should I? You can't hit a _handicapped_ girl. I'm safe forever! I can even call you fa—"

Mio disillusioned Ritsu. Twice.

"Ow. I'm reporting you for disabled-girl abuse."

"That should be interesting, what with you abusing disability _itself_."

They resumed the walk/roll to school. Ritsu took a curious look at Mio. "So what's with the coat?"

The bassist sighed. "If we have to play these roles, I guess we may as well play them convincingly. A shy girl would want a big coat to wrap herself in, right?"

"Not really. It would draw attention."

"...Well, I'm just wearing this because it's cold."

Ritsu smirked. "Didn't think it through, did ya?"

"Shut up."

Before long, they reached the school gates. A hush spread through the crowd of students as they passed; faces froze in shock. Some of the first-year girls even pointed, forgetting politeness in their amazement.

"Move along, ladies," said Ritsu. "Nothing to see here. She's just wearing a big coat." Mio glared at her.

Tsumugi met them at the stairs. "Good morning! How are you on this beautiful day?"

"Uh, fine," said Ritsu. "Aside from the obvious."

"Good! I'm so glad we're all happy! What a day! What a world!"

The other two traded a look. Even by her standards, Tsumugi was glowing today.

"We ready?" asked Ritsu, gesturing at the stairs.

"No!" said Mio. "Not until Azusa gets —"

"Morning," said Azusa, appearing behind Mio. "Can you believe we're going to do this? I can't believe we're going to do this."

"I can't wait!" said Tsumugi. "It'll be fun!"

Azusa nudged Mio and muttered something she couldn't quite hear. "Pardon?" she said.

"Glmssms," muttered Azusa slightly louder.

"Oh!" Mio dug out Sawako's glasses case. "Why didn't you say anything, Ritsu?"

The drummer shrugged. "Am I your glasses' keeper?"

"Let's start!" said Tsumugi, moving closer to the wheelchair.

Azusa did the same, but Mio didn't move; she just glared through the glasses at her friend. "Well, Ritsu?"

"Well what?"

"Get off your rear and help us lift this thing!"

All three girls stared at Mio.

"Oh," she said, blushing with embarrassment... which was immediately replaced with anger. "We're lifting it _with you in it?_"

"We have no choice," said Tsumugi. "People are watching."

"It was hard enough getting it _down_ the stairs _with_ her help! How are we supposed to —"

"Let's just get this over with," said Azusa, taking her position. "Hesitation looks suspicious."

"But we had four people before! How's Mugi supposed to lift her side alone?"

The rich girl rolled up her sleeves. "We can do it, Mio! Let's go!"

Mio scowled. She took her post beside Azusa with great reluctance.

Ritsu took out her drumsticks and tapped them. "One, two, three, four! Heave!"

The three musicians lifted the wheelchair by the handles so it wouldn't tip over. Grunting with the strain, they managed to slowly carry it up the stairs. Their efforts were helped neither by the gawking crowd of students nor by Ritsu's occasional shouts of "Mush!", but somehow they made it.

Mio and Azusa both fell over, exhausted. "That was awesome!" said Ritsu. "It was like being a queen in a sedan-chair!"

"You would make an excellent queen, Ricchan," smiled Tsumugi.

"Oh ho ho! Definitely! What do you think, servant Mio?"

"I think..." said Mio, getting to her feet, "that I am not doing this again."

"Aw, c'mo—"

"NO." The bassist glared right in Ritsu's face, eyes ablaze with fury. "Never again! This is crap and I won't do it! Buy an elevator! And then _kill yourself__!_"

Mio stormed off to her class.

"Huh," said Ritsu. "That was actually scarier with the glasses."

* * *

Ms. Kawasumi didn't like letting another teacher step in during her homeroom class, but this situation was unique. "Class," she said, "Ms. Yamanaka has come to speak to you briefly. Give her your full attention."

Sawako stepped forward and gave her best motherly teacher smile. "Well, girls," she said, "I'm sure you have a few questions this morning."

_They certainly should,_ thought Ms. Kawasumi, glancing around the room. As if Tainaka weren't enough of a spectacle, there were Hirasawa and her sister. And what was that big black thing Kotobuki had brought with her?

After a moment, one student raised her hand. "Where are your glasses, Ms. Yamanaka?"

"Er... I'm trying out contact lenses for a while."

Another hand went up. "Are they comfortable?"

"Very. I hardly notice they're there."

"How much did they cost?" asked a third student. "I've thought about getting contacts, but the good ones are expensive."

"There are disposable ones too," said the girl next to her. "But they're probably not as good."

"Lately they've been making contacts that are just for changing your eye colour," added another student. "Remember when Yuiko had pink eyes as part of her Hallowe'en costume?"

"That was so weird!"

"I could never wear contacts. Putting something right on your —"

"RITSU! Oh no, Teacher! What happened to poor Ritsu?" shouted Ritsu.

The class turned, slightly embarrassed, to look at the drummer.

Sawako cleared her throat. "Yes. Class, I'm afraid there was a terrible accident on the weekend. The light music club was coming in for extra practice —"

Everyone gasped. "Really?" "Extra practice?" "_That_ light music club?" Ritsu sighed, thanking her lucky stars for once that Mio was in another class. This reaction would have mortified her (and guess who she would have taken it out on?)

"It's true that we have sometimes been undisciplined," explained Tsumugi. "But that's not the case anymore. We are very busy preparing for Regionals."

This news excited the class too, at least the music fans. "That's awesome!" said one girl. "Good luck!"

"We'll cheer you on!" said another.

"Do your best! Fight!" said a third.

"You'll lose," muttered Ichigo, fiddling with a lock of hair.

Sawako waited for the fuss to die down and then resumed her story. "As I was saying, there was a practice on the weekend. Yui decided to come in early —"

"Really?" "Early?" "_That_ Yu—"

"AHEM!" Dead silence. Sawako realized that in her annoyance, she'd forgotten to use her Sawako voice. "I mean, ahem. So Yui came in early so she could surprise the others. Unfortunately, her plan was to jump down from the roof to meet them."

Ritsu rolled her eyes. _Big improvement over the trying-to-fly story._

"You see, Yui is very innocent, and she believed thinking happy thoughts would let her fly down to —"

"Oh, come ON!"

"And _Ritsu_," said Sawako with a pointed stare, "tried to save Yui. But she paid a price for her heroism. When Yui landed on her, her legs broke from the impact. She'll be in a wheelchair until they heal. It's going to take some time — at least a month."

The class made noises of distress and sympathy.

"As for Yui, she bounced off and fell into a bush. Thanks to Ritsu, she didn't break anything... but one of the branches poked her in the eye and damaged her optic nerve. She'll be unable to see for the next little while. At least a month."

More commotion. One dismayed girl asked, "It stabbed _both_ her eyes?"

"Long branch. Anyway, that's why Ui is here."

Yui's sister, sitting at right angles to her, nodded firmly. Her face was determined and optimistic, but it was easy to see she'd been crying. Ritsu raised an eyebrow. _Surely Yui didn't forget to... nahhh._

"Now, Ritsu and Yui have it rough right now, and I know you'll all do your best to help them. I don't want to hear anybody making fun of them or gossipping. They don't need any more problems to struggle with."

_Huh,_ thought Ritsu. _That's a nice gesture, Sawa-chan._

Himeko raised her hand. "Does that mean we shouldn't tell our parents about this?"

"Exactly. That's very important. Especially if your parents are friends with the Tainakas or the Hirasawas. They, um, deserve their privacy."

Ritsu sighed. _Of course. Ulterior motive._

"This is so sad!" said Eri. "Poor Ritsu and Yui!"

"And Mio," said Yui. "She caught a little of what I've got."

"...Injuries are contagious?"

"Why not?"

Everyone leaned as far away from Yui as possible.

"_Just kidding!_" shouted Ritsu. "Right, Yui? That was a joke. Mio is really just trying out glasses for a little while."

"At least a month," added Sawako.

Yui was about to say more, but Ritsu shut her down with an angry glare.

"Well, that's not so bad," said Eri. "But I feel terrible for you two! And all this with Regionals coming up!"

"Aw, don't be upset," said Ritsu. "We'll be all right. We don't want anybody being sad over us." _You know, since it's a pack of lies and all._

"That's right!" declared Tsumugi, standing up suddenly. "Every dark cloud has a silver lining, and we'll find it together! We still have the most important thing of all!"

Everyone stared at Tsumugi as she picked up the large carrying case she'd brought to class. With one swift motion, she whipped it open and took out...

"Your keytar?" said Yui.

Tsumugi tossed the strap over her shoulder and turned the instrument on. Without warning, she began playing.

The tune sounded familiar, but Ritsu couldn't quite place it. She wondered what it was, and she _really_ wondered why Sawako wasn't putting a stop to this. In fact, the teacher was leaning against the blackboard with a satisfied look. (Ms. Kawasumi, on the other hand, was clearly shocked.)

And then Tsumugi started singing.

"There's nothing you can do that can't be done," she began, making her way to the left side of the class. "Nothing you can sing that can't be sung... Nothing you can say, but you can learn how to play the game... It's easy!"

Standing by Yui and Ui, she sang the chorus straight to them. "All you need is love! All you need is love! All you need is love, love... Love is all you need!"

The sisters smiled at each other. Sawako gave an approving nod. Ritsu was starting to wish a meteor would crush the school with them all in it.

Tsumugi went into another verse, this time approaching Ritsu. "There's nothing you can know that isn't known... Nothing you can see that isn't shown... Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be.. It's easy!"

The blonde whipped out a photo of Mio and put it on Ritsu's desk. "All you need is love! All you need is love! All you need is love, love... Love is all you need!"

"C'mon, meteor," whispered Ritsu. "Any time now."

Tsumugi went into an instrumental bridge. As she played, she wandered around the class, giving approving smiles to her classmates. She always did this two at a time; apparently she'd sorted the class into pairs by some mysterious metric she alone understood.

At last Tsumugi moved to the front of the classroom for the final chorus. As she sang, her eyes never left Sawako. "All you need is love! All you need is love! All you need is love, love... Love is all you need!"

The class cheered for Tsumugi. Any awkwardness had worn off — her playing was too good not to enjoy. A couple of students shouted things like "That was amazing!"

"Thank you," said Tsumugi with a little bow. She returned to her seat.

"Excellent performance," said Sawako. "We should all take your message to hea—"

"_What the hell was that?_" shouted Ritsu.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Ritsu. I didn't realize you were so eager to get to work. I'll turn you back over to Ms. Kawasumi."

Ritsu meekly turned to Tsumugi. "...Encore?"

* * *

In the lunch line, Jun was practically exploding with surprise. "_Regionals?_ You're going to Regionals? _You?_"

"What's that supposed to mean?" asked Azusa, picking out a bun.

"You're in the light music club! It's the least serious club in school! Even the Cheese-Tasting Club has more dedication than you guys!"

Azusa bopped Jun on the head with her bun. "What you _mean_ to say is that you _thought_ we weren't dedicated, and now you know better."

Her friend gave her a sly look. "Hmm... no, I don't think so. What I mean to say is that you're _up_ to something."

"Don't be silly."

Just then, the cafeteria crowd started buzzing. Jun looked to see what everyone was so excited about. Azusa didn't bother — she could guess. The light music club had entered the building.

"Make way!" said Ritsu needlessly, as the crowd had already made more than enough room for her wheelchair to pass. Behind her, Tsumugi and Ui helped Yui along. Mio in Sawako's glasses brought up the rear, blushing and clearly wishing she were anywhere else.

A first-year girl stepped forward. "R-Ritsu! Ma'am! May I sign your cast?"

"Sure," said the drummer. "Long as you don't address it to 'Ma'am'."

"Thank you!" The girl took out a pen and looked for a good spot to sign. Ritsu waved the rest of the band ahead, and they proceeded to their usual table. As they walked, Yui swept her cane back and forth in a pattern that seemed calculated to detect obstacles, but on closer inspection was completely random.

Ritsu's first-year fan continued examining the cast. "Who's... Mugitsu?" she asked.

The drummer sighed. "Tsumugi's evil twin sister."

"Oh." She looked elsewhere. "And who's Gitsumu?"

"Her _other_ one," said Ritsu, sighing again.

"Should... should I sign with a fake name too?"

"Hey, might as well. I don't actually know your real one."

Back in the lunch line, Jun was staring at Azusa like a judge stares at a delinquent.

"Oh, stop it," said Azusa.

"Not up to something, huh?"

"Well, _I'm_ not," she clarified. And oh, how she wished it were true.

* * *

"No, _you're_ the cute one," whispered Sawako into her cell phone.

"...Well, yeah, I do work out. ...Yeah, those are good points. But I'm still going with you.

"We can fight over it tonight at dinner. Or maybe back at your place, hmmmm?

"...Oh, still being cleaned? My place then. No problem.

"Let's say 5:30. I have a feeling those brats will be whiny again today. You have no idea how annoying they are. I swear, if I ever get those photos back from Ritsu, I'm cutting the whole bunch of 'em loose.

"...No, light music, remember? I don't know anything about journalism.

"Okay. See you then. You t—

"Shhh! I'm at work! Save the naughty talk for when we're alone. Okay, bye for now."

The teacher hung up her phone and sank into her seat, grinning like the cat that caught —

"_Sawako!_"

She spun to see her boss right behind her. "Principal Yamada! You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

"That would be tragic. I apologize."

_Please, please don't let him have heard that phone call._ "So, uh, hello, sir. How have you —"

"Speaking of tragedies," the principal continued, "I see that your light music club has experienced several."

"Y-yes. That accident on the weekend was very unfortunate."

"And so poorly timed. After all, we had just made our arrangement about Regionals. If the girls had been been hurt more seriously, we might have had to call it off."

Mentally, Sawako kicked herself six times. _Why didn't I THINK of that? It's perfect! Maybe I could still shatter Yui's —_

"I would then, of course, have had no choice but to go straight to re-evaluating your faculty position."

"Oh."

"But the girls were fortunate. Their injuries are such that they can still play their instruments. Perhaps there was an unseen hand guiding events."

The fact that he hadn't specified a _divine_ hand was not lost on Sawako. "Uh, just good luck, I guess."

"Indeed. I look forward to seeing their progress. Keep me informed."

"Yes, sir."

The principal headed off, but turned around in the doorway. "By the way, Sawako... you _are_ familiar with our policy about making personal calls while on the clock?"

_Oh no._ "Yes, sir. It's discouraged."

"I would like to mention that this policy goes triple for calling sex lines."

Sawako went incandescent red. "But! But I —!"

"Oh, don't get the wrong idea," said Principal Yamada, the picture of innocence. "I'm mentioning that to everyone today."

* * *

The Jazz Club held onto the last chord of "Stompin' At the Savoy" for a good five seconds. Finally, they got the signal and released (aside from the wind players, who had already run out of breath). They lowered their instruments, pretty pleased with themselves. This was the first time they'd made it all the way through without losing anyone.

Their teacher, Megumi Yamasu, sighed deeply. Somewhere across the Pacific, Benny Goodman was surely swingin' in his grave.

She had loved music once, hadn't she? Ms. Yamasu found it harder to remember every day. It wasn't this specific jazz group that had broken her down, nor any of the past years' ensembles... no, the fault was her own. She had let herself hope that something produced by high school students could actually _be_ music.

"Not bad," she said, hating herself for the lie. Of _course_ it had been bad. It had been bad the way murder was bad.

"Thanks!" chirped a couple of the first-years. It didn't really matter which.

"I think you have the main piece down," continued Ms. Yamasu. _As down as you ever will._ "Now who wants to try soloing on this one?"

All the girls started glancing around, hoping someone else would volunteer. No one did, of course. No one ever did. These kids weren't here because they had the spirit of jazz in their souls, eager to get out and get funky. They were here because the word "jazz" sounded neat.

"We'll decide later," said Ms. Yamasu. "Let's move on to... to..."

She couldn't do it. None of their numbers deserved this treatment.

"Never mind. I'll let you go a little early today." She would just have to let her endurance build back up before conducting these girls again. Right now, she couldn't stand the sight of them.

The students started packing up their instruments. "Thanks, Ms. Yamasu!" said a couple of them, blissfully ignorant of the reason for her generosity.

The teacher retreated to her office to look for some aspirin. Mere moments after she closed the door, someone knocked. Ms. Yamasu closed her eyes and let herself picture, just once, using the student's head to do some _real_ knocking. Then she fought back the satisfying image and opened the door.

"Hey Ms. Yamasu!" It was the bassist, Jun. "Can I come in? I have some important information!"

The teacher let her in with the greatest reluctance. It wasn't a good sign that she knew this girl's name. All the other first-years were interchangeable, mediocre but harmless. Jun was the only one annoying enough to distinguish herself.

"I've found out —" Jun began, then paused to close the door just in case. "I've found out the light music club is _up to something!_"

"Who?"

"The light music club! Our rivals!"

Ms. Yamasu closed her eyes just long enough to roll them. _Rivals? A toddler banging on a garbage can is out of this jazz band's league._

"I have contacts in the group," continued Jun, "and trust me, something fishy is _definitely_ going on. They're going to Regionals, but there's more to it than that. We've got to find out the details so we can plan a counterattack!"

"Counterattack?"

"Yeah! Their success is our failure! We have to undermine them!"

Ms. Yamasu rubbed her temples. She was starting to remember what this light music club was, and that annoyed her. She wanted the conversation over before she had to pretend to care any further. "Jun, I can see that you're really on the ball. Why don't you take the lead in dealing with this problem?"

"R-really? Me?"

"Yes. I'll leave it in your capable hands."

"Thank you so much, Ms. Yamasu! I won't let you down! In fact, I already have a plan to —"

The teacher raised a hand. "It's okay. I don't need to know the details."

"...Because if you don't _know_, you won't have to lie!" said Jun, putting zero and zero together. "Brilliant!"

"Right," Ms. Yamasu lied. "Now go get started."

With a salute, Jun took off.

Ms. Yamasu found her aspirin bottle and stared at it for a minute. Then she put it away; for this headache, she needed stronger medicine. At least four shots of it.

* * *

"Explain again," said Mio.

"Do it better," said Ritsu.

"And make it not crazy this time," said Azusa. "Uh, Teacher."

The three of them, arms crossed firmly, were staring down Sawako. With Mio in the centre, they looked a bit like an Olympic podium.

"Come on, I was perfectly clear the first time," replied Sawako. "Yui, you understood, right?"

"Yeah. It sounds like fun! Sort of."

"Exactly," said Mio. "If she likes the idea, she obviously missed something. Explain again."

Sawako sighed. "If I must. You girls have a severe shortage of live experience. You've only played for crowds a couple of times. Azusa _never_ has."

"Not with this club," corrected Azusa. "I've had other —"

"Your cat doesn't count."

"Hey! I —"

"— will keep getting insulted until I stop interrupting. That's what you were going to say, right?"

Azusa shut up, but her expression made Yui think of a puffer fish.

"So, to prepare for our live at Regionals, you need as much experience as possible. You also need to be in music mode all the time, even in class. Otherwise those hours are wasted."

"No no no!" said Yui, surprising the others. "We have to study in school!"

"Or sleep?" asked Ritsu.

Behind her dark glasses, Yui blinked. "Is that bad? Don't things you hear in your sleep still reach your brain?"

"No!" said Mio, aghast.

"Are you _sure_?"

"YES!"

Yui turned to her sister for help. Holding back a laugh, Ui patted Yui's shoulder and said, "We'll run some experiments when we get home, okay, big sis?"

"Don't get me wrong," resumed Sawako. "Classes are important, but this month they have to come second. Music mode, 24/7. With me so far?"

The girls nodded.

"So that's why you're going to sing in class from now o—"

"CUT!" shouted Ritsu.

"_That's_ where you lose us," said Mio. "We're not singing in class. Not a chance."

"Is that so?" asked Sawako. "Tsumugi seems to disagree with you."

"E...even so." Mio glanced at the rich girl awkwardly. Tsumugi was a good friend, but Mio never really knew what was in her head... and whatever was in there lately made the bassist very uncomfortable.

"Tell 'em," said Sawako. "You didn't mind singing in class, did you?"

"It was delightful," said Tsumugi, and her face left no room to doubt she meant it. "Sharing my thoughts musically was a wonderful experience. It's fun, Mio! Let's all try it!"

Mio lowered her eyes. "Sorry, Mugi. I don't want to disappoint you, but this is one stunt I'm not doing."

"So that's final, is it?" asked Sawako.

"Right."

"No chance you'll change your mind?"

"No! Absolutely, definitely, totally none!"

"I see. Thirty push-ups."

"What?"

"Drop and give me thirty. Right now."

Mio looked all around, uncomprehending. "Push-ups? Why?"

"Because I told you to. See, you girls have come to fundamentally misunderstand our relationship. It's my own fault, really — I've been way, _way_ too easy on you. You've forgotten that I don't have to be."

Ritsu winced. She'd been dreading this turn of events for a while.

"Your relationship?" said Yui. "You mean with that guy?"

"No! What guy? There's no guy! _How did you find out?_"

"We watched you out the window."

Ritsu gave a thumbs-up. "Nice catch, Sawa-chan. He's a babe."

The teacher blushed. "Yes. Yes, he is. I'll introduce you sometime. But stop distracting me! Where was I?"

"Not having to be easy on us," supplied Tsumugi. Azusa noted absently that she hadn't flipped out this time.

"Right. I am a teacher at this school. What does that make me?"

"...A teacher?" Ritsu tried.

"It makes me your GOD, that's what it makes me!" yelled Sawako. "If I tell you to do something, you do it twice on stilts! My wish is your command! And you never, ever, EVER get to say no to me!"

Yui looked stunned. "But... but you're one of us! You always share our tea..."

"The gap between us is so wide, not even the best tea in the world can cross it!" (Tsumugi beamed.)

"I... I..." Yui's dismay was boundless. The guitarist had never really thought of Sawako as a teacher; to her, this was like losing a friend.

Ritsu gave her a sympathetic pat, but out the corner of her eye, she was watching Azusa. _This could go one of two ways,_ she thought. _She could share our terror of Sawa-chan in command mode, or —_

"I'm with you, Teacher!" declared Azusa, standing at attention. Ritsu sighed. _That's the other way._

"Good little Azusa," said Sawako, smiling. "I knew you would understand."

Ritsu muttered, "Twerp."

"Hey! I love this club, but it's always needed more structure. Leadership is the first step."

"Good girl." Sawako patted Azusa on the head. "Now give me thirty push-ups."

"_What?_ Why?"

"You don't look any tanner today."

"It's the middle of winter! It'll take —"

"Floor."

"But I —"

"_Now._"

Fuming, Azusa got in position. Ritsu smiled. She had a feeling the junior's authority-worship wouldn't last long.

"Well?" said Sawako to Mio, pointing down. The bassist lowered herself, her face fighting between embarrassment and rage. It looked to Ritsu like rage was winning, but the glasses made it harder than usual to tell.

Yui watched the forced exercise fearfully. "We'd better not do anything wrong, Ricchan!" she whispered.

"Good idea," Ritsu replied. "You should start by going back in time and not being the one to _recognize Mugi's keytar_."

"Why shouldn't I have... oh!" Yui blushed. "Sorry! Don't tell!"

Sawako narrowed her eyes at the whispered exchange. "Do you have something to report, Yui?"

"Uh, yes! I saw a TV show last week about marine biology!"

"And?"

"They showed how an octopus can squeeze its whole body through a little crack!"

"I see. Thanks for filling us in."

"I will keep you posted of any further developments!"

Azusa stood up, panting. "That's... that's thirty."

"Nice time," said Ritsu. "You kids today are energetic." Mio, who was still at 18, tried not to pay attention.

"Okay, girls, get your instruments out," said Sawako. "We're already late starting."

The four band members not otherwise occupied began gearing up. As they did, Sawako continued, "I know this is all pretty overwhelming for you. Just do your best, and don't forget that I believe in you. As long as you put in your best effort this month, I know you can win at Regionals."

With a final effort, Mio pushed herself up, counted "Th-thirty," and collapsed on the floor.

Sawako gave her a contemptuous glare. "You think this is hard? Try being a kamikaze pilot! _That's_ hard!"

Someone knocked on the door.

"Who could that be?" said Tsumugi, speaking for everyone.

The knob began to turn. Sawako spun around. "_Ritsu!_"

The drummer was already leaping into her wheelchair. She snapped her casts shut just as the door swung open — and Azusa and Ui gasped in surprise.

Sawako cleared her throat. "What can we do for you?"

"You can make a little room," said Jun, bass case in hand. "I'm _signin' up!_"

* * *

**Next: Drumroll, Please**

(A/N: Relax, this isn't a songfic. But you can't do a Glee parody without a few insert songs. Wait, what the hell is Glee?)


	4. Can't Fight This Feeling

Five minutes ago, Jun had burst in and announced her intention to join the light music club. Three minutes ago, most of the club members had decided she was serious. One minute ago, she had convinced Azusa that it wasn't a prank and she really _was_ serious, honest. Probably.

Now, Jun was hanging out by the instruments with Ui while everyone else huddled around the tea table in conference.

"I vote no," said Ritsu.

Mio glared at her. "_How_ long have we been trying to get new members for this club? And now one comes right through our door and you object!"

"At any other time, this would be awesome. But now?" Ritsu shook her head. "This is how it goes wrong in the movies. The caper _always_ falls apart when you take on somebody who's not in on it."

"A band is not a caper!"

"But our concert plan essentially is," said Tsumugi. "Ricchan has a point."

"Then this is one more good reason to drop the whole thing!" Mio threw up her hands. "Let's just be a club again! This whole scheme is crazy! We never should... should have... um... f-forget it."

Sawako, of course, had stared the bassist into submission. "Don't provoke me, Akiyama," she said. "I will yank out your hair one strand at a time."

Yui turned to her fellow guitarist. "Jun is your friend, Azu-nyan. Do you think we should let her in?"

"Oh! Uh, you guys are the senior members..."

"It's okay," said Mio. "We'd like to hear what you think."

"Well... normally I'd be really excited. But I agree with Ritsu that there are potential problems right now. It might be better to wait till after Regionals."

"There may not be a club after Regionals," Tsumugi pointed out. "But if Jun joins now, she might help our chances."

"A bigger band isn't automatically better," said Ritsu. "What if she turns out to be our Pete Best? Our Stuart Sutcliffe? Even, God help us, our Yoko Ono?"

Yui frowned; she might not know who any of those people were, but she understood the sentiment. "Ricchan's right! Sometimes new members are trouble! Remember that other time?"

Tsumugi and Azusa gestured wildly for her to stop.

"You know, the time with Akane Mi–"

"SHHHHHHH!" Azusa clamped her hand on Yui's mouth.

She was too late. Mio and Ritsu were both staring at the floor in full brood-mode.

"Yui," said Tsumugi gently, "sometimes when an upsetting thing happens, it's better not to mention it again."

"Is this one of those things?"

"This is several of those things."

Azusa looked back and forth between Ritsu and Mio. They were totally silent, faces turned away from each other. Ritsu drummed her fingers on the table; Mio adjusted her hair, then adjusted it back.

"...Would anyone like more tea?" ventured Tsumugi.

Mio finally spoke. "Ritsu, I told you how sorry I —"

"Oh, _spare_ me the crocodile tears," said the drummer.

Sawako checked her watch. "Can we get back to the question at hand, please?"

"Right!" said Yui. "Mugi, the answer is yes. We do want more tea."

Azusa was about to scold Yui, but caught herself and left it to Tsumugi, who whacked Yui's head lightly. "The question about Jun, silly!" she said, pleased as punch.

"I still say no," said Ritsu. "Too risky."

"And I still say yes," said Mio. "If for no other reason, Azusa is under a lot of pressure as our only junior member. It's not fair to her if we turn Jun away."

Somewhere in Yui's head, an engine turned over. "JUNior member! It's perfect! I vote yes!"

"Okay, Yui doesn't get a vote anymore," said Ritsu. "How 'bout you, Mugi?"

"I will abide by the decision of the majority," said Tsumugi, peaceful as a windless lake.

"It's cute how you all think this is a democracy," said Sawako. "Weren't you listening before? Until Regionals are over, _I_ steer this ship."

"Right," said Mio with a sigh. "What's your verdict?"

"Frankly, I don't like the looks of this kid. I think... we..."

Everyone waited.

"Azusa," she finally continued, "did you say Jun was in some other club?"

"The jazz club," replied Azusa. "I guess she must be quitting, though. Our practice times collide."

Quietly at first, then louder, Sawako laughed a laugh that made the girls' blood run cold. She reached up and touched the bridge of her nose, forgetting that she wasn't wearing her glasses. "Poach a member poach a member POACH A MEMBER! We'll do it!"

"Er... poach?" asked Ritsu.

"Steal. Capture. Appropriate. Take things what doesn't belongs to ya."

Ritsu knew what the _word_ meant, but decided not to press further. Sawako's motives probably weren't rational enough to be worth hearing anyway.

"She's in!" concluded Sawako. "Go welcome her to the club, ladies."

"Hooray!" said Yui. She and the others got up (Ritsu excepted) and went to join Jun and Ui.

"So? Have you decided?" asked the newcomer, playing with —

"Jun! Put that down!" cried Azusa.

"Why? Ui was just showing it to me."

"Down! Quick!"

With a shrug, Jun roughly set Giita back on its stand. She gave the G string a good pluck just for kicks.

With a TWWONNG you could hear from across the street, the string snapped. Its loose end whipped out and hit Ui's arm; she yelped in pain.

Jun sheepishly looked at Yui. "Uh, sorry about that. Those G strings, huh?"

Yui was purple with rage.

"You can never join the light music club," she said. "Never! NEVER EVER!"

* * *

"Took us an hour and a half to calm her down," said Sawako through a mouthful of pasta. "Weirdest part? She kept grabbing her _own_ arm in the spot where her sister got hit."

"So did she let the new girl join?"

"Eventually. She made her apologize to the guitar first."

The man across the table laughed heartily. "The things you have to put up with. More wine?"

"Yes yes!"

He poured, and she admired his pouring. Everything Tetsuo did, he did with flair. He owned the world — and Sawako loved to watch him own it.

"I wish I could have had you as a teacher," he said. "You clearly have a real gift for it."

"Aw, you're sweet. But I don't know if this is a permanent career for me." Sawako stirred her cocktail. "I might want to, you know... settle down..."

For just a moment, Tetsuo's smile faltered, but it was so brief Sawako decided to ignore it. He'd probably just tasted something funny.

"So I was thinking," she said, switching gears. "When you pick me up tomorrow, why don't you come in first? The girls are eager to meet you."

Tetsuo choked on his salad. "You told them about me?"

"Apparently I didn't have to," Sawako muttered. Between this and her old photos, she was starting to doubt there was any point in trying to keep secrets from that bunch of Nancy Drews.

"Well, I, er... I guess that would be okay. Sure. Why not?"

"Great!" She threw him a wink. "Sexy _and_ accommodating."

"What can I say? I'm flexible." He winked, back in command. It was as though his composure had never slipped.

They resumed eating. After a while, Tetsuo spoke up again. "I may be a little late tomorrow."

"Oh. Big day?"

"Very," he said through a mouthful of salad. "I have an important meeting with the Kotobuki group. They're my biggest clients."

"Well, take all the time you need. I'll wait. Making mon– I mean, serving your clients comes first."

"Thanks." He winked again. "I'll make sure it's worth your while."

"Oh reeeally? That sounds like something we can get started on tonight."

Tetsuo grinned and paged the nearest waiter. "Check, please."

_I bet he'll be surprised to see his clients' daughter in my club,_ Sawako reflected, and then she put all thoughts of tomorrow on the back burner.

* * *

Azusa had decided to come in a little early today. The weather was nice, and she liked being at school before the crowds arrived. It made her feel like the place belonged to her just a little more than —

Her cell phone rang. She picked it up to see a text message from Ritsu.

_SAVE ME!_

"Uh... what?"

Azusa called her senior back to see what was wrong. To her annoyance, there was no answer. Some kind of weird joke...? Whatever. She put her phone away and kept walking.

Moments later, the phone rang again. This time it said _S.O.S.! Come to school quick!_

With a sigh, Azusa called back. No answer this time either. "What the heck is she up to?" the guitarist muttered.

Again she put the phone away, and again her respite was short-lived. All the way to school, the messages kept coming.

_Hurry! I'm doomed!_

_Saaaaaave meeeee!_

_Na-ka-NO! I know you're reading this! You better help your senior or I'll eat you for breakfast!_

_For BREAKFAST! Toasted! With a side of bacon!_

_Sorry, that was mean. Just help! I'll make your lunches forever!_

_Azusa? Hello?_

_** SIDE! OF! BACON! **_

By this point Azusa had almost reached the school. She was about to turn the last corner when someone hissed at her from the bushes. "Over here! Quick!"

She stared into the foliage. "Ritsu?"

"Who were you expecting, Ultraman? Come closer!"

Azusa, who would frankly have preferred Ultraman, approached suspiciously. "What's going on here?"

"Shh! We've gotta be quiet. Take a look around the corner. _Carefully._"

She poked her head out just enough to see the school's main entrance. "Oh, Jun's there," she said. "What's the problem?"

"She's been there for half an hour! I can't get in!"

"Huh? Why can't... oh. Oh, I see how it is." Azusa glared at Ritsu. "Where exactly is your wheelchair?"

"I'll explain later. Just distract her! Get her inside so I can sneak in!"

Reluctantly, Azusa turned the corner and headed for where Jun was standing. Her friend noticed her immediately. "Hey Azusa! You're here early too, huh?"

"Yeah. It's a nice day, I thought I'd enjoy it. What about you?"

"Uh, same here! Just look at this great weather! WOO!" Jun pumped a fist at the sky.

Azusa raised an eyebrow. _The lady doth protest too much._ "Well, people will be getting here soon," she said. "Let's head inside."

Jun nodded, and they proceeded to the locker area. As they changed out of their outdoor clothes, Jun gushed about how excited she was to be in the light music club. Azusa listened, still not quite sold, but trying not to let on.

After a couple of minutes, her phone rang yet again. The message read _All clear! C ya!_

Uh-uh. Ritsu wasn't getting off that easy. "Hey Jun, I should answer this call. I'll meet you in class, okay?"

Azusa caught up with Ritsu a few hallways down. Somehow, the drummer was all geared up now — wheelchair, casts, the whole package. "Hey Azusa!" she said. "Thanks again!"

"You haven't thanked me the first time yet."

"Oh, then take this as —"

"_Explanations!_" interrupted Azusa. "What was all that about?"

"I wish I knew. Does your friend always come in that early? And, like, guard the door?"

"I've never seen — no, that's not the issue! Where was your wheelchair before?"

"Ah. Well, you were there when Mio went bazonkers, right? She's not gonna lift the chair anymore. I can't ask you and Mugi to do it alone, and Yui's supposed to be blind... so I had a way better idea."

"Better?"

"See, I just need to be seen in a wheelchair. It doesn't always have to be the _same_ wheelchair."

"Oh no."

"I planned it all out with Mugi. She bought a bunch more chairs. One can stay in the club room, and I found a hiding spot on the first floor for another one. If I need more, I'll keep hidin' 'em."

"You can't be serious."

"So now all I have to do is get from one chair to another without being spotted. It's like a stealth game, and I'm good at those. Zombie games too. Seriously, we ever get a zombie outbreak, you just call me. I'm the Zombie Master. This one time —"

"Are you _insane_?"

"Yeah, you're right. We'd never get zombies here. Maybe aliens."

"I mean this whole plan! It's crazy! There are so many things wrong with it!"

"Like what?" asked Ritsu, genuinely curious.

"Like...! Like...!" Azusa stammered; all the obvious crippling flaws were jamming together, blocking the exit to her brain. After a moment, they broke through in a jumbled heap. "People! Timing! Parents! Money! _Stupid!_"

"Generally inobservant, early and late, already made up some extra practices, Mugi, and nuh-uh, in that order. Anything else?"

Azusa fell silent. The drummer had done her homework — she had a flimsy answer for everything. "Okay, fine. But don't come crying to me next time you get caught."

"Hey, I wasn't picking on you. I called everybody. You were just the first to show up."

"Okay, but why didn't you answer when I called back?"

Ritsu, whose phone had been on silent by mistake, said "Jun might've heard. Had to play it safe."

The mention of Jun reminded Azusa that her friend would soon be wondering where she'd gone off to. "I'd better head for class. You'll be okay now, right?"

"No problemo. Thanks again."

"You _still_ haven't... oh, forget it."

Halfway back to class, Azusa got another text message. This time the ringtone was Yui's. She opened it to read.

_Hey Azu-nyan! Ricchan says save her. See you later! XOXO_

Some days, Azusa really felt like transferring to the calligraphy club.

* * *

Elsewhere in the school, Sawako asked, "Is that tight enough?"

"Very comfortable," said Tsumugi. "Thank you."

"Good. Get your clothes back on, quick."

As Tsumugi put herself back together, Sawako glanced nervously at her watch. They were cutting this much too close. She'd have to think of a less public place next time.

"Ready!" said Tsumugi. "Please allow me to thank you once again for this privilege, Teacher."

"Don't mention it," said Sawako, and she meant it. This was not something she should be thanked for.

After a moment, she realized with alarm that her student wasn't leaving. The rich girl looked like she wanted to say something, but wasn't sure if she should. "What's wrong, Tsumugi?" Sawako asked.

"Teacher... would you please call me Mugi?"

Sawako raised an eyebrow. This was about some silly nickname? "I don't know if that's appropri..."

She couldn't finish the sentence. Tsumugi was a sight that would have moved Genghis Khan to tears. Her clasped hands and wide eyes made it undeniable how important this request was to her.

"Oh, all right," said Sawako. "Mugi it is."

"Thank you!" she said. "And... and..."

"Yes?"

"_And..._"

"Spit it out."

"_May I please call you Sawa-chan?_" she finished.

The teacher sighed. "That's not some privilege. I've been trying to get the others to stop."

"But... since they won't..."

Sawako checked her watch again nervously. People would be arriving any second. In fact, what was that sound just now...? "Oh, all right, you can call me that. Now go! _Hurry!_"

"Thank you! Thank you so much, Sawa-chan!" Tsumugi took off, bouncing off the walls in delight.

Sawako slumped in her chair with relief. That had been way too close for comfo–

"_Sawako!_"

Of course. Of _course_ Principal Yamada had been walking in at that very moment. "Good morning, sir," she said, sitting up straight again.

"Good morning. I see you were having another meeting with Miss Kotobuki."

Fortunately, Sawako had an excuse ready for that. "Well, you know, with Regionals coming up, Mu– uh, Tsumugi is worried about falling behind in class. She asked me for a little extra help. As club supervisor, I thought it was the least I could do."

"Indeed. I'm glad your students look up to you. Keep up the good work."

He headed for his office. But just as Sawako was about to stand down from red alert, he turned back around and said, "Since she _does_ look up to you so much, I'm sure you'll be very careful not to do anything that might... upset her. Correct?"

_Oh crap he knows he knows he knows!_ "Of course, sir! I wouldn't dream of it!"

"Good," said Principal Yamada. "I'm counting on the Kotobukis for our fourth-quarter expenses."

* * *

Ms. Kawasumi surveyed her class with a wary eye. So far, so good. All right, the Hirasawa sisters still stuck out like a sore thumb, and Kotobuki had a strange look on her face, but no one seemed too distracted... and above all, no one had brought a musical instrument this time.

So why was her trouble sense still acting up? Simple paranoia? Best to try and ignore it for now. She picked up her chalk and began the lesson. "As you know, ten years ago a mysterious event took place that scientists currently believe..."

She focused her gaze on one student. _Target acquired._ "Tainaka."

"Yes, ma'am?"

"Pay attention."

"I am!" And indeed, she was. That was the problem. Ritsu was _never_ this attentive.

But she couldn't punish a student who hadn't yet misbehaved. She'd just have to give the drummer enough rope to hang herself; anyway, a warning might be sufficient. Ms. Kawasumi turned back to the board. "To continue, ten years ago an event known as Kaimon took place. Scientists —"

"DRUM SOLO!"

Ms. Kawasumi spun around... and couldn't believe what she was seeing. Ritsu had produced a pair of drumsticks and was banging out a tattoo on her desk.

For a while, the teacher just stared in amazement. What could possibly be possessing Ritsu to think this was acceptable behaviour? The rest of the class seemed to take it in stride; the girls closest to Ritsu were covering their ears, but some others were nodding along with the beat. Yui in particular was listening very carefully, a slight frown on her face. She leaned over and said, "You're rushing, Ricchan!"

"Excuse me?" replied Ritsu. "Who's the expert here?"

Oh, that _tore_ it. "TAINAKA!"

"Yes, ma'am?"

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Expressing my feelings! Sawa-chan told us to. Any time we feel the urge, we're supposed to bust out with a musical number."

"Not in my class, you're not! And how is that noise conveying any feelings?"

"This song is about the pain and frustration of being handicapped," said Ritsu. "Can't you tell?"

"Just _stop it!_"

"Oh, fine." She put the drumsticks away.

Ms. Kawasumi took a deep, calming breath and turned back to the blackboard. "As I was saying, ten years ago a phenomenon known as the Kaimon event took place. Scientists —"

"DRUM SOLO!"

The noise started back up. Furious, Ms. Kawasumi spun around. "I told you to stop!"

"I felt inspired again," said Ritsu.

"Insp– come ON! There aren't even any words in this song!"

"You can't stifle my creativity! I gotta be me!"

In Ms. Kawasumi's high school days, she had been the class idol, admired by juniors and respected by peers. Above all, she was famous for her mature femininity. When her classmates thought of words like "ladylike", "elegant", "unflappable", they thought of Chika Kawasumi.

Only her best friends knew she had a temper. Only her worst enemies had seen that temper first-hand. And _no one_ dared to speak of it.

Now, for the first time, a student had pushed her too far. Her nostrils flared. Her ears turned red. Her black hair nearly burst out of its tight bun. She stormed over to Ritsu, grabbed the drumsticks, and snapped them in half.

"Hey! Those cost —"

"_My classroom is orderly!_" screamed the teacher. "Those who cannot be orderly will be punished until they can! Do you understand, Tainaka? DO YOU?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"I don't care what Yamanaka tells you! In this class, there will be no spontaneous drum solos! Feelings are expressed with words, not property damage!"

"Okay."

"Do I make myself clear? No drumming! _None!_"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Good."

Ms. Kawasumi returned to the blackboard. Once there, she closed her eyes and took a moment to collect herself. She was already wishing she hadn't lost her temper... but faced with behaviour like this, who could blame her?

"Now then." She picked up her chalk and started writing again. "Ten years ago —"

"We'll be fighting in the streets! With our children at our feet! And the morals that they worship will be gone!..."

No. It couldn't be. It _couldn't._

"And the men who spurred us on sit in judgment of all wrong! They decide and the shotgun sings the song!..."

Ms. Kawasumi turned, very slowly, to confirm the unbelievable evidence of her ears. Ritsu was _singing_ now.

"I'll tip my hat to the new constitution! Take a bow for the new revolution! Smile and grin at the change all around... Pick up my guitar and play!" (She nodded at Yui, who grinned.) "Just like yesterday! And I'll get on my knees and prayyyyy... DRUM SOLO!"

Grabbing two pencils, Ritsu started banging on her desk again. This time the "solo" was brief; she soon resumed singing, but kept up the percussion. As she went on, more and more of the class got into it, tapping their feet and swaying to the rhythm. At last she reached the end of the song, built up a drumroll that could have inspired scarecrows to march, and ended with a final smash. Both pencils broke, their ends flying across the room.

Ms. Kawasumi didn't bother telling Ritsu what was going to happen. They both knew. She simply asked, "Was it worth it, Tainaka?"

"Yep! You can't put a price on self-expression."

"And what were you expressing this time?"

"Let's say the handicapped thing again."

* * *

_Question 1. (2 marks) A train leaves point A, travelling at 60 km/h. 150 km away at point B, a second train departs at 45 km/h. The dispatcher has carelessly assigned both trains the same track. What will be the distance between the two trains at the moment when they crash?_

Mio stared at the question in horror. She didn't even know how to start solving it. And this was only worth two marks! What hope did she have for the rest?

Even worse, the other students near Mio didn't seem to be having trouble at all. Nodoka was no surprise, but the rest weren't usually on her level. Getting desperate, Mio looked all around the room, trying to find at least a _little_ company for her misery... but not only was everyone doing fine, they even seemed to be smiling. Smirking! _At her!_

Just then, the teacher cleared his throat. Mio started; she hadn't seen him coming. "Is your own paper not sufficiently interesting, Miss Akiyama?" he asked.

"They're laughing!" she hissed. "They're all laughing at me! And so are _you_!"

He leaned over and said, "I highly recommend that you calm down and focus on your own work. Pretend no one else is here." He moved on to watch other students.

Mio took a few deep breaths. Maybe the teacher was right. It was worth a try, at least. She looked closely at her test paper — taking off Sawako's glasses, which had steamed up a bit — and did her best to ignore the rest of the room.

To her amazement, Mio felt less stressed-out almost immediately. She was able to concentrate on the test, and it didn't even look as scary anymore. Okay, that first question was tough, but the next one wasn't so bad. Or the next one... in fact, that one was easy...

25 minutes later, Mio couldn't believe she'd been so upset. She was three pages into the test without further incident. What was more, she was now calm enough to realize she'd been imagining things before. Her classmates weren't laughing at her; they weren't thinking about her at all. They were busy with their own tests. Even Nodoka looked like she was struggling a bit.

Mio's relief was so powerful that for the briefest of moments, she actually felt a song coming on. But that was _not_ going to happen. Sawako could just keep giving her pushups till doomsday.

Thinking of Sawako reminded Mio about her borrowed glasses. Better not be seen without them for too long. She wiped the lenses on her shirt sleeve and put them back on, then turned the page.

...Wait a minute. This fourth page was _way_ harder than the first three. And did that girl beside her just _snicker_?

When Mio finally handed in her test, her writing was practically unreadable, every other line had been wildly crossed out, and her entire answer to Question 1 was "I'll train YOU!" Also, she didn't so much hand the test in as crumple it up and hurl it out the window.

* * *

_God bless lunchtime,_ thought Ms. Yamasu. There were no words for how badly she needed this break in her day. The solitude of the teachers' office was her only escape from the hundreds of inept students who surrounded her — weighing her down, draining her energy, crushing her like a pile of rocks.

Rocks — that was the perfect metaphor for these students. They were useless, mindless. They served no purpose except to strain the poor fool who had to carry them. And they couldn't stay in tune for ten damn seconds at a time.

Yamasu's contemplation was interrupted when another teacher came in. It was Ms. Kawasumi, who looked around, frowning. "Has Sawako been in here today?" she asked.

"Not that I've seen," said Yamasu.

She sat down, rubbing her hands together in frustration. "When I find her..."

"Why? What did she do?"

"Let me put it this way," said Kawasumi. She opened her lunchbox, took out a pair of chopsticks, and started banging them on the desk. This went on for about thirty seconds.

"If that was an audition for the jazz club, you're in," said Yamasu.

"No, there was just this student who..." Kawasumi raised her eyebrows. "They're that bad?"

Yamasu stared hopelessly at the ceiling. "You do not. Even. Know."

Before Kawasumi could inquire further, someone knocked at the door. "Psst! Ms. Yamasu!"

Panic gripped the teacher. Was there any way to get out of this? Maybe if she stayed very quiet... oh no, Chika was here too! She tried to think of some excuse, but it was too late; the other teacher was already opening the door.

The student — Jun, of course — marched inside and saluted. "Agent Suzuki reporting for duty, Chief!"

"At ease," said Yamasu. "You have news, I take it?"

"You bet! Phase One went perfectly — I'm in. Phase Two is currently under way. I started this morning."

"And how did that go?"

"No decisive results. I had a strategy, but while I was carrying it out, Target Zero showed up and diverted my attention. I think she may be onto me."

"Not good. Work on that."

"Aye, Captain!" Jun saluted again. "I'll report again this time tomorrow!"

Yamasu's eyes widened with horror. "D-don't you think it might be better to meet earlier? Or later?"

"Nope. I have classes and band practice. Gotta be lunchtime! See ya then! _Vive le roi!_" With a final thumbs-up, Jun headed out the door.

Yamasu stared into the middle distance, watching her precious lunchtimes ride off into the sunset. She shed a single tear for them.

Looking at the door Jun had just left through, Kawasumi asked, "What in the world was that about?"

"Damned if I know," said Yamasu.

"I don't mean the French, I mean the whole thing."

"So do I." She sighed heavily. "That was Jun from the jazz club. She's trying to infiltrate the light music club because she's got it in her head that we're rivals."

"And you really aren't?"

"Of course not! I don't know why anyone would think that!"

The door opened again. Ms. Sawako came in, took a quick look around, and walked up to Yamasu, grinning like a fiend. "Well _hello_ there."

"Hi, Sawako."

"Heh heh... so how's the ol' jazz club doing these days?"

"Same as ever."

Sawako snickered. "Talk about composure! You're good, Megumi. Nobody looking at you would know."

Yamasu rolled her eyes during a blink. "Know what exactly?"

"That you were betrayed, of course. That one of your beloved members defected to your _rival_ club!"

"It's fine, really. You can have her."

Sawako patted Yamasu on the head. "That's the spirit! Fight on!" Still smirking, she left the way she'd come.

Kawasumi, who'd been watching with detached curiosity like a baseball fan at the Super Bowl, suddenly remembered she had her own Sawako problem. "Get back here, you!" she said, taking off in pursuit.

Alone at last, Yamasu closed her eyes and tried to find inner calm. There was still a little time left before she had to teach again. If she could just relax properly now, she'd be able to get through —

"Hey Yuiko!" a girl shouted in the hallway. "Come see my new cellphone!"

"Woooooow! It's so cute!"

"And I have the best ringtone for it! Listen to this!"

Some godawful pop song started playing in roughly 8-Track quality, and Yamasu, without even having to think, reached into her purse for her last hope. She opened it and raised it to her lips.

Empty. She'd forgotten to refill the damn thing.

As schoolgirl banter ricocheted around her brain, Yamasu laid her head on the table and soberly awaited the migraine's warm embrace.

* * *

"Fluffy fluffy time!" sang Mio and Yui, finishing the song with their usual call-and-response routine. The band played a few more chords, holding the final one; Ritsu drumrolled them out. Silence followed as all six girls gasped for breath.

"Admit it," said Sawako.

Mio sighed. "You were right. We sound even better with two basses."

"Woo!" Jun jumped in delight. "I won't let you down, senior!"

Yui, on the other hand, was facing Ritsu and frowning slightly. "Ricchan, are you okay?" she asked.

"Sure. Five by five. Why?"

The guitarist leaned in and whispered, "You're slacking off!"

"...Huh?"

"You're not playing a bunch of your instruments!"

Ritsu facepalmed. "Yui, before you went blind, what did you usually see on the floor near my drums?"

"Pedals and stuff."

"Good. And what am I sitting in?"

"A wheelchair. Oh! I get it." She lowered her voice conspiratorially. "Sitting around all day is making you lazy, isn't it, Ricchan?"

"DRUM SOLO!" yelled Ritsu, battering Yui's head with her drumsticks.

Sawako checked her watch. "Ah, it's time! I have a surprise for you girls. Wait here a minute." She skipped out of the room.

"Oh good," muttered Mio. "A surprise. Those are _great_. Like that surprise math test earlier..."

"I _know_!" said Ritsu. "We wrote it too. I couldn't even get the first one!"

"That wasn't fair at all," said Mio, scowling at the mention of that question. "Trains? Who even _rides_ those anymore? How were we supposed to know the distance between them?"

"Zero," said Yui.

Both girls stared at her.

"They crashed! Boom!" Yui illustrated with hand gestures.

Mio and Ritsu traded an appalled look. They wanted to bang their heads against a wall, but no wall hard enough for this occasion existed.

Azusa checked her watch. "Ms. Sawako's taking a while," she said. "I wonder what this is about."

"It'll be great!" said Jun, still bouncing around. "Everything's great! We rock!"

Mio smiled at her new apprentice. "You did very well today, Jun. You'll be a good addition to the band."

"Yep! I'll do my best! No sabotage here!"

Azusa gave Jun a suspicious look. "Nobody mentioned sabotage."

"Right! 'Cause there's not gonna be any! Heh heh. _Heh heh._"

"What's so funny?"

"...Um. I, uh, heard this joke earlier."

"Do tell."

"Right. _Tell_ it. Uh... so this octopus walks into a bar..." Yui perked up, suddenly fascinated.

As Jun continued, Mio brought her bass over to its stand. Then she gently pulled Tsumugi off to the side for a moment. "Mugi," she said, "is everything all right?"

"Of course! Why do you ask?"

Mio hesitated; there was no tactful way to approach this. "Have you been, er... eating right?"

"What do you mean?"

"It's just... I mean, the two of us share a certain worry, so to speak... and it looks like you've, well... put on... j-just remember you can always talk to me, okay?"

Before the blonde could reply, Ritsu called out from across the room, "Hey Mugi! You're lookin' round today!"

One near-concussion later, Ritsu was bowing as low as she could in her wheelchair, apologizing profusely to Tsumugi for her insensitivity. The rich girl seemed more amused than anything else. "You're right, Ricchan," she said, blushing. "I have been a bit careless with snacks lately. I will be sure to watch my intake more carefully."

"It's okay," said Mio. "I was just concerned as a friend. You don't owe us anything."

"Right! Fat is fine too! We're cool with that!" said the drummer.

One near-concussion later, Ritsu was bowing as low as she could in her wheelchair, apologizing profusely to Tsumugi for her insensitivity.

"And then the rabbi says, 'Get me a beer and a mop!'" finished Jun.

Yui stared. "Then what?"

The new club member stared at her in disbelief. "Senior, this is the fourth time I've tried to end —"

"It still doesn't feel like it's over! Keep going!"

Jun pondered, eyes crossed. "So then, uh... then who should walk in but... okay, these two ropes come in the door, right? And the bartender gets mad, 'cause they don't serve —"

"Ropes? How would ropes come in on their own?"

"They're _living_ ropes. And the first one says —"

"But how do they stand up and walk? Can they control their whole length or just their ends?"

Jun shot Azusa a desperate glance, but no help was forthcoming. The rhythm guitarist was having the time of her life watching this. She leaned over and whispered to Ui, "Looks like being 'blind' hasn't changed Yui much, eh?"

"Not a bit!" said Ui, smiling happily at... wait. Were those _tears_? Why were there tears in her eyes? _No way... Yui, don't tell me you..._

Just then, the door opened again, saving Jun from more improv. Sawako was back — and she wasn't alone. Beside her was the man who had been picking her up after practice lately. He was even more striking close up — not only handsome, but clean-cut and dressed to kill.

"Girls," said Sawako, "let me introduce you to my boyfriend, Tetsuo Tsukamoto. He's a financial consultant."

All seven girls gave a little bow. "It's a pleasure," said Mio on the group's behalf.

"The pleasure's all mine," he replied, sauve as some international spy in a movie. Ritsu swore she could see a lens flare off his teeth.

"So who's who?" he asked Sawako. "I'd like to put some faces to the names I keep hearing."

"This is Mio," she replied, indicating the bassist. "And here we have Yui... this is her sister, Ui... here's Azusa and the new one, Jun... in back is Ritsu..."

"Ah," said Tetsuo, nodding sagely. "_Ritsu._" He put an arm around Sawako in support.

"Hey!" complained Ritsu. "What's that about?"

"Oh, I've told Tetsuo a thing or two about you, that's all..."

"I dare you to give me five minutes alone with him! I'll tell him enough about _you_ to make his head catch fire!"

"Heh. That's enough, you," said Sawako flippantly. She _sounded_ flippant, at least. But as she laughed, her eyes sent Ritsu a very clear message: _Your body will never be found._

There was a noise from over by the keyboard: "Ahmm!" It sounded like a first attempt at purposeful throat-clearing by someone who had never tried it, only seen it done.

"Right! I didn't finish," said Sawako. "But our last member needs no introduction. After all, she's your clients' daughter!" She made a grand gesture toward Tsumugi.

Tetsuo held very, very still. After a moment, he said "Why... so she is."

"Tsumugi Kotobuki at your service," said the heiress, beaming. "I am delighted to meet you."

For one more long moment, Tetsuo was motionless; then, as if his engine had been jumpstarted, he turned to Sawako and said, "Well that was great I'm glad I finally got to meet them but we should probably go after all our reservation is for six and it's what five now so let's go!"

It was actually four-thirty, but Sawako had no objections. She took Tetsuo's arm. "Okay, girls, we're done. See you tomorrow, same time. And Azusa? _Tanner!_" The happy couple departed, leaving Azusa blushing with embarrassment and both Yui and Jun wondering why.

"That guy's gonna be in the news for holding up a casino," said Ritsu. "You heard it here first."

Mio frowned. Something about that conversation just now wasn't sitting right. She couldn't quite place it, but... "Mugi," she asked, "what was it you said to Sawa-chan's boyfriend?"

"I said I was delighted to meet him."

A hush fell upon the room. The keyboardist's voice had sounded very strange. As one, the girls turned to look at her... and gasped.

Tsumugi was smiling, but it wasn't like any smile they had seen their friend wear before. It was cold-blooded, confident, supremely satisfied. It was the smile of a predator.

"My father finds it useful to cultivate the image of a family man," Tsumugi continued. "He makes a point of introducing me to all of his major clients and associates. Over the years, I have met every one of them, often on multiple occasions.

"I have _never met that man before_."

And as her bandmates stared, Tsumugi picked up her things and danced out the door, humming a cheery tune.

* * *

**Next: We're Gonna Need a Montage**

(A/N: Remember those Ai Yori Aoshi jokes in my last story? I've got a short fic for that series in progress, called "The Red String Blues". Check it out. Also, apparently I need to start making _three_ backups of nearly-finished chapters in case I screw up the first two. Also, what's a Glee?) 


	5. Mash Up

The final chord of "My Love is a Stapler" echoed through the music room, and as one, the six members of After-School Tea Time held their breath and waited for the verdict.

"That was better," said Sawako. "No push-ups this time."

The band sighed with relief, Yui in particular. Ever since Sawako had gone drill sergeant, the guitarist had been learning the hard way that a diet of 90 percent sugar wasn't ideal for staying in shape.

"This song is my favourite so far!" said Jun, who said that about all of Mio's songs. "Did you really write this all by yourself, senior?"

Mio blushed. "Yes. It's nothing special..."

"Unless you mean like Special-Olympics special," muttered Ritsu.

Neither of the bassists heard that, but Azusa did. "Whoa!" she said, aghast.

"Oh, relax. It's not offensive if _I_ say it." Ritsu patted one of her casts.

"Yes it is!"

"No it's not." She patted the other one.

"Yes it _is_! It would only be okay for you to say that if you really _were_ handi–"

The rhythm guitarist was interrupted by Tsumugi's hand clamping down on her mouth. Sawako and Ritsu, who hadn't been close enough, let out a relieved breath. Azusa's eyes went wide as she realized what she'd nearly said. All four turned slowly to see if the new member had heard anything.

Luckily, Jun was still busy interrogating Mio about her song-writing techniques. "Do you come up with your music or lyrics first? Or both together?"

"Oh, well, it depends on the song," said Mio. "Sometimes I have the perfect tune and just need words for it, but other times..."

As she listened, Ritsu's smirk grew wider. _She is eating this up with a soup ladle. I bet I'm the only one who can tell._ (Actually, Sawako and Ui noticed too. So did Tsumugi, and she giggled in her head at Ritsu thinking she was the only one. Meanwhile, all Yui could tell was that everybody was smiling mysteriously.)

"With this song, I think the tune came first," finished Mio.

"But the lyrics are great too!" Jun gushed. "What was your inspiration for them?"

Everyone stared. "Seriously?" asked Mio.

"Yeah!"

"You want to know what inspired me to write 'My Love is a Stapler'."

Jun nodded with great enthusiasm.

"...Staplers," said Mio. "They staple things together."

"Wow!" Jun grinned like she'd just been let in on one of the great secrets of the universe.

"Congratulations, Yui," said Ritsu confidentially. "We've finally found a _real_ junior for ya."

"I'll take good care of her!" said the guitarist.

Sawako stood up. "All right, ladies, you're free to go. Don't forget to practice at home."

"Already?" said Azusa, surprised. "We usually play until... oh."

"Date, right?" asked Ritsu, finishing Azusa's thought.

"_Not_ that it's your business, but yes," said Sawako. "Tetsuo and I are seeing a double feature at the Matahora."

"What, the rep theater?"

"The two of us happen to share an appreciation for classic Godzilla films. See you tomorrow!"

Mio snuck out the door after Sawako. "Teacher," she said quietly, "are you sure you're making the right decision?"

"About what?" asked Sawako, not stopping.

"Mr. Tsukamoto! Wouldn't it be prudent to at least slow down a bit with him? We told you what Tsumugi said..."

"And _I_ told you that she's just misremembering. Or maybe making things up for some reason. Who can tell with her?"

"But –!"

"Listen." Sawako turned around. "I appreciate that you girls are worried about me. But you're kids, and I'm an adult. I know what I'm doing. All right?"

"...All right," said Mio. She had no choice. Somehow, Sawako could speak reasonably in that gentle voice and still make it sound like a threat.

The teacher left, and Mio returned to the clubroom. Jun had transferred her attention to Yui, who was busily explaining the ins and outs of playing lead guitar. ("It's very important not to stop for a rest! The others don't stop with you!") Tsumugi was gazing out the window thoughtfully, one hand resting on her stomach. Azusa was telling Ui what was new in the first-year classes.

All _seemed_ well. But somehow Mio didn't feel that way. "I'm worried," she said to Ritsu.

"Yeah, me too. That Tetsuo dude has gotta be an American in disguise."

"I mean about _us_." She gestured at their bandmates. "We're not taking this seriously enough yet. I don't think we'll be ready in time."

"Aw, we'll make it! We still have what, six weeks?"

Mio blinked. "That's what you think?"

"Sure. It's like a month, a month is like five weeks, five is like six... Why? How long _do_ we have?"

"_Nineteen days._"

Ritsu went pale, but quickly recovered. "We'll be fiiiiine."

"You think so?"

"Sure. We just need to knuckle down! Nineteen days are plenty, as long as we use 'em well and don't get distracted."

Mio looked at Ritsu's wheelchair. She looked at Yui's dark glasses. She looked at Tsumugi's deal, whatever it was.

"I mean any _more_ distracted," said Ritsu.

* * *

**_18 Days to Regionals_**

It was time. There was no way she could put it off any longer.

She looked carefully through the aisles. This item was way out of season, so the selection was limited, but she eventually found one. It was a bit cheaper than she'd expected. Didn't exactly look high-quality, but you get what you pay for.

She brought it up to the checkout. The cashier barely even tried to hide his surprise. He stared at the bottle of tan cream, then at her, clearly wondering if she was serious.

"Please just ring it up," said Azusa, sighing like she had never quite sighed before.

* * *

**_17 Days to Regionals_**

"We need some really good songs for Regionals," said Mio on the walk to school. "I wish I could think of a good subject."

"Mm-hmm," said Ritsu, half-listening.

"_You_ could always try writing a song, you know. There's no reason I have to be the only –"

"We'll have this conversation again when you take back what you said about my last one."

"Er... which one do you mean?"

"You know friggin' well which one! 'Beware the Mecha-Brontosaurus'!"

Mio's eyes watered with the effort to keep a straight face, but it was hopeless. She burst out laughing. Doubling over, she struggled to say something nice about that _thing_. "It's... it's not so..."

"Oh, shut up," said Ritsu, hiding an embarrassed blush.

Once Mio calmed down, they resumed walking. The bassist's thoughts soon returned to song topics. "I just need one or two really good ones," she muttered. "We only have a few minutes on stage..."

Ritsu decided to try an experiment. She slipped her cell phone out of her pocket and set it in her lap — not using it, just keeping it out in the open.

"Hey, Ritsu," said Mio after a minute. "What do you think about cell phones as a theme?"

"I think I win," said the drummer, snickering.

"Run," said Mio.

Ritsu blinked. "What?"

"RUN!"

The drummer had no chance to inquire further — Mio had just shoved her down the side path, toward the clubhouse where her outdoor wheelchair was stored. She spun around to complain, but Mio's face stopped her cold. Her friend had just put her glasses on. There was trouble.

Ritsu disappeared around the back of the clubhouse mere moments before Jun reached Mio. "Hi hi hi!"

"Good morning," said the bassist with a smile, silently thanking God that she had seen Jun up ahead before the junior student had seen her.

"Hey, was there someone with you just now?"

"Uh, no. That was probably a... a bird. Let's get to school!"

Mio began quick-marching forward. Jun raised an eyebrow, but fell in step beside her. "Hey, do we know which songs we're playing for Regionals yet?"

"Not yet. I'm still trying to –"

"Do you think I could write one? I have the greatest idea!"

That was the last Ritsu heard of their conversation before they were out of earshot. She waited another five minutes, then carefully snuck back around to the front of the clubhouse to get her equipment. Another close call! It couldn't be a coincidence. What was with this Jun kid?

"If her song even _sounds_ like mine, I'm drop-kicking her down the stairs," Ritsu muttered as she wheeled herself to school.

* * *

**_16 Days to Regionals_**

"Good morning!" sang Tsumugi on her way down the stairs. That was no exaggeration — she had literally sung it. The Kotobukis had never seen their daughter as happy as she'd been in the last few days.

_I should just enjoy this,_ thought Mrs. Kotobuki. _I should be happy for her. But..._

...But a mother liked to know _why_ her children felt the way they did. She liked to know what was in their heads. And Mrs. Kotobuki could usually read her daughter much better than this. She had no idea what was making Tsumugi so happy lately.

As the younger Kotobuki twirled (yes) into the dining room for breakfast, her mother frowned, noticing something else. Tsumugi's happiness might be a mystery, but she had another problem that was all too obvious. Indeed, it was becoming impossible to miss.

"Good morning, Mother!" said Tsumugi, giving her a hug.

Mrs. Kotobuki patted her daughter on the back. "Good morning, dear. Um... I wonder if I might speak to you for a moment..."

"Of course!" Tsumugi leaned into whisper range.

That wasn't quite what Mrs. Kotobuki had meant, but she let it go. "Darling," she said in as low a voice as possible, "I'm worried about how much weight you've been gaining."

Tsumugi drew back quickly. "What a thing to say, Mother!"

"I'm not _criticizing_ you, I'm simply concerned..."

"So I must preserve a perfect figure in order to meet your approval!"

"No! But..." Mrs. Kotobuki lowered her voice again. "It's not normal to gain weight so _fast_, Tsumugi! What have you been eating lately?"

"This is silly, Mother. You're making too much of things."

"Oh, come on! You look like you've gained ten pounds since _yesterday_!"

Tsumugi stared coldly. "I believe I will pass on breakfast this morning. I'm sure _that_ will please you at least."

She turned to leave, but then seemed to change her mind, running over to Mr. Kotobuki's side. She didn't speak, just gave him a big smile. "Erm... good morning, dear," he said.

"Good morning, Father. Would you say it again, please?"

He frowned. "I don't understand why you keep asking me –"

"_Please_, Daddy?" she said, and it was hopeless. He couldn't say no to that.

"I have no business partners, employees, or consultants by the name of Tsukamoto," he said.

Tsumugi squealed with joy, hugged him, and ran off to school.

* * *

**_15 Days to Regionals_**

"We're going to try something different today," said Sawako. "Give this a read." She began passing sheets of music around.

Ritsu gasped. "We're not _that_ desperate yet, are we?"

"Desperate?"

"Wait, never mind," said the drummer, looking at the music. "This isn't one of your old songs."

"No, it's — HEY! I wrote some powerful music when I was in this club, missy!"

"Yeah, and now you're a high school teacher. I'm lookin' for a future here."

"That's not the problem with her songs," corrected Yui. "They're just really noisy and they all sound the same."

Sawako loomed over them with a stare that would have made a lion run for cover.

"Uh," said Yui.

"Just kiddin'?" said Ritsu.

"20 pushups each," said Sawako. "You have two minutes. If either of you fails, you both start over."

Yui made a little "eep" noise. "You'll have to keep time for us, Ricchan! I don't have a Braille watch yet!"

"Can I swap her for Mugi?" Ritsu asked Sawako.

As the two offenders got in position on the floor, Mio flipped through the sheets Sawako had given out. "I don't understand. What's this for?"

"I got you the music to a couple of old P-Model songs," said Sawako. "They were pretty popular when I was your age. The judges will know them."

"But what's wrong with _my_ songs?"

Sawako raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

"Yes!"

"Give me a minute. I need to alphabetize the list."

Ritsu burst out laughing. Yui did too, but only because Ritsu had; she herself didn't see what was so funny about alphabetical order. Both girls lost their balance and hit the floor. Sawako glared, and they got back to pushing up.

The teacher turned back to see tears in Mio's eyes. "I... I thought you liked my songs..."

Belatedly, Sawako remembered that she'd been pretending to like them in a bid to soften her image. She might be in drill instructor mode now, but it was important to stay consistent. "I do like your songs, dear. They're just not really Regionals material."

"Then I'll work harder on my new ones!" Mio took out a notebook and started jotting things down.

"New ones, huh? What do you have so far?"

There was a short pause. "...Three lines."

"How do they go?"

Another short pause. "...I'm still ironing out the wording."

"Right. Tell you what: keep up the good fight, but until you're finished, let's learn these pieces."

Mio sighed. "Okay. If that's what you –"

She was interrupted by the sound of her cell phone. She took it out only to give it a puzzled look. "Why did Azusa send me a text message that just says 'j'?"

"_Battle stations!_" shouted Ritsu. She got to her feet and started gearing up. Tsumugi came to help her; Yui and Mio, who got the point now, whipped out their glasses. They were just in time. It was mere moments before Azusa and Jun came through the door.

"Tell me!"

"No."

"_Tell me!_"

"I said –"

"Tell me! Tell me tell me tell me! TELL ME. Tell me!"

Azusa looked plaintively at her bandmates. "Can somebody make her stop?"

"She'll probably stop if you tell her," said Ritsu.

"I _can't_! There's nothing to tell!" The rhythm guitarist made a face.

"Bad Jun," said Yui. "Leave Azu-puff alone!"

Everyone took a moment to process that nickname, then collectively decided to ignore it. "What's this about?" Mio asked Jun.

"Azusa looks different today!" said the younger bassist. "I'm sure of it. I just can't put my finger on how..."

"Nothing's different!" said Azusa. "Tell her!"

Sawako looked her up and down, paying particular attention to her complexion. "Not different _enough_," she concluded.

"I'm working on it," the junior student muttered.

"Oo! I've got it!" said Jun. "It's your pigtails!"

"What about them?"

"You have _two_ today!"

"That's the usual number."

"Then you must've _switched_ them!"

Azusa stared at her for a long moment. Finally, Mio said, "Hey Jun, we have some new music today. You should take a look."

"Oo!" Jun skipped over to see.

Azusa sighed like she'd just been released from the rack. She turned to Sawako, vengeance burning in her eyes. "I've been thinking. You know that other gimmick you suggested for me? I bet it would work nicely for her."

The teacher raised both eyebrows. "You think so? It was really just a threat..."

"Hey teach!" said Jun, flipping through the pages. "This stuff's older than we are! Where'd you dig it up, a fossil park?"

Sawako's expression went stone cold. "That idea of yours may have merit," she told Azusa.

"You'll have to be subtle. She doesn't know we have gimmicks."

"Mm-hmm. Maybe I'll just make a few suggestions to her."

They looked at Jun. She was back in Mio-admiration mode. "Have I told you lately how much you impress me, senior?" she asked, staring directly at the older girl's chest.

"Maybe I won't even bother," said Sawako.

* * *

**_14 Days to Regionals_**

In Ms. Kawasumi's high school days, she had been an upstanding citizen. Gossip and rumours were beneath her. As far as she was concerned, other people's problems were their business; she had her own to deal with.

But now she was a teacher, and that gave her certain responsibilities. When a student started having trouble, it was her job to help... even if it meant intruding a bit.

Thus it came to pass that she was face to face in the teachers' room with the most confusing student she'd ever taught.

"You wanted to see me?" asked Tsumugi.

"Yes. I'm concerned about..." Ms. Kawasumi sighed; where to begin? "Kotobuki, you have an excellent academic record. But some of your recent work has been a little strange."

"How so?"

"Well, take this literature test. You gave _Romeo and Juliet_ as an example of a story with a happy ending."

"It is! They love each other so much!" Tsumugi was practically glittering.

"But they _die_."

"And now they're together in eternity!"

"...Right." Ms. Kawasumi looked through the stack. "And here we have a math test where you've factored a polynomial into 'love plus happy squared'."

"Addition is wonderful! One plus one can be as much as it wants to be!"

"No it can't. It's two."

"Who are we to tell those numbers what they can and can't do?"

Ms. Kawasumi sighed deeply. She wished the problem here weren't so obvious. "Listen –"

Someone knocked on the door. "Psst! _Psst._"

"She's not here."

There was a pause. "Can you give her a message?"

"Go away, Suzuki."

The teacher waited a moment to make sure Jun was gone, then turned back to Tsumugi. "Look, I know what's going on here. You're a young girl and you've suddenly gone lovey-dovey; this is no mystery. You found a boyfriend, right?"

Tsumugi blanked. "A what? Oh. Yes, you could say that. Hee hee."

"I'm happy for you. But you can't let this affect your studies — your future depends on it. Try to get your head out of the clouds, okay?"

"Okay," said Tsumugi, head in the clouds. "Anything else?"

Oh yes, there was something else. But Ms. Kawasumi had no desire to know about it. She willed herself not to look at Tsumugi's waistline. No matter how severe a student's body-image issues and/or nutritional excesses were, they were her parents' business; Kawasumi refused to get involved.

And above all, she wouldn't let the _other_ possibility even enter her mind. This wasn't some inner-city school, dammit.

"That's all," she said. "You can go." Tsumugi gave a bow and skipped off on her way.

Once the door closed, Principal Yamada popped his head out of his office. "In dealing with that student," he said, "please bear in mind that her parents could snap us like a twig."

"Underst–"

Someone knocked at the door again. "Psst."

"_She's not here!_"

* * *

**_13 Days to Regionals_**

Ritsu peered around the corner. Perfect — the stairwell was clear. Go, go, go!

She raced up the first flight of stairs, then rounded the corner. She would only be out in the open for a few more seconds. The system was perfect. She and Tsumugi had snuck in one night, cleared out an equipment closet on each floor, and changed the locks; then, in a stroke of pure genius, they'd hung handicapped-washroom signs on the doors. Ritsu was the only disabled student, so there would be no question about why she kept leaving those rooms, nor would anyone else use them.

Tsumugi had "convinced" the janitors to ignore these new rooms. Of course, none of the other staff knew why there were suddenly handicapped washrooms on each floor — but they all assumed _someone_ knew. Ah, the joys of poor communication!

Almost there. Ritsu whipped out her key. This would be –

Time froze. She'd just seen someone in her peripheral vision. She spun to see her worst fear come true. A classmate was right there, staring at her.

Ritsu looked at Ichigo.

Ichigo looked at her.

Ritsu held very, very still.

Ichigo sighed. "Whatever."

She went on her way. The drummer watched her go. _Huh_, she thought, not quite believing she was safe. _Who knew I would ever be grateful for that girl's apathy?_

Later, after all the blackmail, Ritsu was less grateful.

* * *

**_12 Days to Regionals_**

When most high-schoolers talk about going to the music store, they mean some overpriced CD retailer, full of name brand merchandise. Others might be referring to a used dealer. But a small group have something different in mind — a store for music producers rather than consumers, carrying instruments and sheet music. Today Mio and Yui were at the music store.

"I don't get it," said Yui as her friend flipped through some bass charts. "If you want to write new songs, why are we looking at the ones here?"

_She waited till we got here to ask that?_ thought Mio. "I'm looking for inspiration."

"Oh? Well, that should be easy. Let's look around until something inspires you."

"It's not like –"

"Look! That guitar on the wall is green!"

"I said –"

"Greeeeen guitar!" sang Yui. "You live on the wall aloooone! When will someone take you hoooome?... There, see? It's easy."

Mio rolled her eyes and made sure Yui saw her do it. "This can't be just any song. I need something that'll really make an impact — show the world we're serious."

"Ahhhh," said Yui. "I understand."

"Glad to hear –"

"I'll give you _lots_ of ideas so you can pick out the best one. Look! That drum set is 10 percent off!"

Mio banged her head on the wall. "This isn't –"

"Look! That ceiling light is flashing off and on!"

"Whatever." Mio resumed looking through the sheet music.

"Look! That guy is — WHOAAA! Mio, look! _Look!_"

Reluctantly, the bassist turned. Yui was pointing at a boy across the store from them. "I don't recognize him. Should I?"

"He's the guitarist of Southwest Tokyo Academy's light music club! They're in our category at Regionals!"

"Oh. You researched our opponents?"

"Most of them are on Facebook. Mio, isn't this amazing? Meeting our competition here of all places!"

_Of all places?_ "Well, it's nice, I guess."

"And — and Mio! _Mio!_ What if he and I fell in _love_?"

"Sure, that would — WHAT?"

Yui had her hands on her cheeks, a pose she'd picked up from Tsumugi. "Two rival guitarists coming together against all the odds! It would be just like _Romeo and Juliet_!"

"Um... you know that story doesn't have a happy ending, right?"

"Really? Mugi said it did."

Mio couldn't quite believe she was hearing this. "Since when are you interested in dating?"

The guitarist looked hurt. "I'm a young girl! I'm supposed to be!"

"Yes, but don't _force_ yourself."

"I'm not! I like boys just like anyone else! You just don't see it because we don't have any at school!"

Mio pondered. "Something must be setting you off. Did you read anything lately that –"

"You're ignoring me!"

"So not a book? Was it a video game, maybe?"

Yui was turning red. "I'll show you! That boy and I are meant to be! We'll be married for six million years! Come on, Giita!"

With that, she unzipped her guitar case and ran across the store. She snuck up behind the Southwest Tokyo student, who immediately noticed her. "Can I help you?" he asked.

Yui just grinned.

"Hello?" He waved his hand in front of her face.

No reaction.

With a shrug, the boy turned back around. But as soon as he did –

"I thought love was only true in fairytales! Meant for someone else but not for me! Love was out to get me, that's the way it seemed... disappointment haunted all my dreams..."

Mio sighed deeply. She'd accepted that the others were doing impromptu performances as Ms. Sawako had ordered, but she'd hoped not to be present for any of them.

"Then I saw your face! Now I'm a believer! Not a trace of doubt in my mind! I'm in love — ooo! — I'm a believer, I couldn't leave you if I tried!"

Yui winked at the guy. He, of course, was staring at her in disbelief. Mio didn't blame him. Relatively few young men had experience being serenaded in public by a random girl with an unplugged electric guitar.

"I thought love was more or less a givin' thing... Seems the more I gave the less I got... What's the use in trying? All you get is pain! When I needed sunshine I got rain!"

The store employees were starting to take a dim view of this — almost as dim as Mio's own — but Yui steamed ahead. The boy just stared, transfixed. Mio couldn't quite tell how he felt about this. But he wasn't trying to stop her... good Lord, could Yui's crazy plan actually be working?

It was soon time for the final chorus (mercifully, old singles tended to be short). Yui sang it with extra sincerity. "I'm in love! I'm a believer! I couldn't leave you if I tried!"

She repeated the chorus, getting quieter and quieter. Mio rolled her eyes at the idea of a live fade-out. But then there was trouble — Yui just kept on going. Soon she was singing almost inaudibly and barely touching the strings. Mio could see panic in her friend's eyes. _Oh brother... she doesn't know how to end this, does she?_

Taking pity, Mio snuck over and put a hand on Giita's strings to silence them. Yui took that as an ending. She caught her breath for a minute, then looked up at the guy expectantly. "Well? What do you think?"

He stammered. "Uh... nice finger work?"

"No, about US! You and me! Forever! Love at first sight! Against all the odds!"

Before the guy could answer, a girl walked into the store and took his arm. "Just about done here, Matsuo? I want to get your opinion on some hats."

"Hats! Awesome!" The guy bolted from the store like a spooked rabbit, pulling his girlfriend along.

"But... but us!" Yui called after him. "Star-crossed love! I'm a believer!"

"Apparently he can leave you if he tries," said Mio.

She immediately regretted her quip when she saw the tears in Yui's eyes. "My... my first love is already over?"

The bassist sighed. "Come on. Let's get some ice cream. We'll talk about how ridiculous every single part of this was when you're feeling better."

Yui sniffled. "I'll never feel better. My heart is torn to pieces. Love is dead. What kind of ice cream?"

"Your favourite."

"Okay." Yui zipped Giita back up and followed. "But if they don't have it, love is dead."

* * *

**_11 Days to Regionals_**

In the lunch line, Azusa and Jun were both trying not to stare.

"So," said Azusa eventually. "New haircut, huh?"

"Yep!"

"Isn't it kind of a boy cut?"

"I guess. Ms. Sawako said I should try this look. She was really emphatic."

"Right." Azusa was starting to regret what she'd suggested to Ms. Sawako in that moment of pique.

There was silence for a bit. "So," said Jun eventually. "New... uh..."

"Yes?"

Jun squinted at Azusa. "New..."

"Well?"

The bassist gave up. "Azusa, did you fall in a vat of beef broth or something?"

"No! This is a sunburn!"

"I've seen you sunburnt. This is different. And why do you smell like cocoa butter?"

"It's nothing," Azusa said firmly.

"Okay. If you say so."

She turned back around. Glancing back and forth, she took out a microcassette recorder and whispered, "Target Zero hiding something. Investigate further."

"What was that?"

"Nothing!" Jun pocketed the machine and started whistling.

Azusa raised an eyebrow. She made a mental note to investigate further.

The first-years behind them really wished the line would move.

* * *

**_10 Days to Regionals_**

"We've gotta ask her eventually," said Ritsu. "It's getting ridiculous. She looks like she swallowed a Ferris wheel."

"I know." Mio sighed. "But if it's part of her gimmick, we can't stop her. Maybe we're better off not knowing."

"No, it's important. Depending on what the gimmick is, we may have to kick Sawa-chan's butt."

"We're not attacking anyone! Stop suggesting that every time we have a problem!"

"What, just because it's wrong?" Ritsu smirked. "Aww, that's cute. You think we'll still have consciences by the time this is over."

Mio scowled. _She_ would at least, dammit.

The bathroom was coming up on the left. Ritsu noticed someone standing outside. "Nuts, there's a line. So much for a stealthy pit stop."

"You could go in there _with_ the wheelchair," said Mio. "Real disabled people use bathrooms too."

"Not happenin'. There are parts of my life I refuse to get this thing involved with. I'll hold it in."

Mio smirked. "Why not just use one of those handicapped bathrooms we've suddenly had lately?"

"Ha _ha_. Hey, Ui!"

Indeed, Yui's sister was the one standing outside the washroom. She bowed politely. "Good afternoon!"

Ritsu pointed her thumb at the door. "Crowded in there?"

"No, no. I'm just waiting for Big Sister." Worry crossed her face. "I hope she's okay..."

"Uh, I'm sure Yui can handle herself," said Mio, although that was a dubious proposition at the best of times.

"Wait," said Ritsu. Something wasn't right here. "What exactly are you worried about?"

Ui cast her eyes down. "Well, you know... she might trip, or use the wrong tap, or sit down without realizing the seat was up..."

Mio and Ritsu were briefly distracted trying to think of a reason the seat would be up in an all-girl school. They snapped out of it just in time to see — yet again — tears in Ui's eyes. "What's the matter?" Mio asked.

"Big Sister... she's so b-brave... she always does her best..."

Ritsu raised an eyebrow. "Is this some other sister you haven't told us about?"

"Seeing her like this... i-it just makes me so sad! Poor Big Sister!"

Mio hesitated. "Ui, you... you _do_ know..."

"I'm sorry!" sobbed Ui, pushing the door open. "I've got to go make sure she's okay! I'll see you later!"

For a long moment, Mio and Ritsu stared after her.

"We're gonna have to kick Yui's butt, aren't we?" asked Ritsu.

"Yes," said Mio. "I think we are."

* * *

**_9 Days to Regionals_**

"Well?" asked Sawako, making a full turn. "Does this vest look good on me?"

"Better than the yellow jumpsuit did," said Tetsuo with a smirk.

"I _told_ you that was just for fun."

"If your idea of fun is killing Bill..."

Sawako got a mischievous look. "I don't know... I kinda like the idea of being the Bride."

Her boyfriend turned slightly blue. "Right! That'll be nice someday. Someday."

"You said 'someday' twice."

"Did I? Someday. I mean, sorry."

Sawako took the vest back off and headed to the register to buy it. Tetsuo followed, still muttering something that sounded like "someday". The cashier smiled and added their purchases. When he gave them the total, Tetsuo reached in his pocket and rooted around for a second, then frowned. "Oh no! I forgot my credit card _again_!"

"Wow. You really need to work on that," said Sawako. "It's okay, I'll cover this."

"Aw, I can't make you buy your own three-week-anniversary present..."

She winked. "You'll make it up to me."

"Okay. If you _insist_."

As they headed for the exit, someone called out "Sawa-chan!" The teacher turned to see Tsumugi running up to her in great excitement. Her outfit took Sawako by surprise — she was wearing a jaunty nautical ensemble, complete with boating cap.

"Well, if it isn't Mugi," she said. "Or should I call you Captain?"

Tsumugi giggled. "Don't worry! It's just something I'm trying on. And hello to you too, Mr. Tsukamoto!"

"Er, hi," he said, glancing at the exit door like a base runner considering a steal. "Nice to see you again, Miss Kotobuki."

"_You_ can call me Captain," she said. Her expression was unchanged, but there was a frightening little glint in her eyes. He chuckled nervously.

"It's nice running into you, but we need to get going," said Sawako. "We have some celebrating to do today."

"Oh? What are you up to?"

"Just... things. Fun things."

"_Grown-up_ things that are none of your business," added Tetsuo. As he expected, Sawako swatted him for that, but he wanted to strike a nerve. This kid was really starting to irritate him. (And what had she been eating since he last saw her?)

"Oh!" said Tsumugi. "I won't hold you up, then. See you at practice tomorrow!"

"Right." Sawako, a bit embarrassed, turned to leave.

Tetsuo followed, only to feel Tsumugi grabbing his upper arm. Quietly, without Sawako noticing, she pulled him down and whispered in his ear, "I will destroy you utterly."

"Huh?" He looked at her. The rich girl's happy expression was unchanged from before, but that glint was back in her eyes.

"Have a nice time!" she said, and skipped off toward the fitting rooms.

* * *

**_8 Days to Regionals_**

The teacher was late, and Mio's class was making the most of it in the ways they saw fit. Nodoka was going over her notes. Mio was struggling with her current song project, "Let's Clap Erasers Together". And pretty much everyone else was gossipping. Mio tried not to listen, but one trio of girls was too loud to ignore.

"Did you hear about that Suzuki girl in first year? They say she's psst psst..."

"No way! Isn't she the one with an arranged marriage?"

"_I_ heard she was secretly super-rich!"

"And didn't she join the light music club while she was still in a different one? So irresponsible!"

"No no, it won't interfere. They never do anythi–"

"Shh!" One of the girls cocked her head at Mio.

"Oh yeah. Well, you know."

Tears burned in Mio's eyes. Why couldn't people mind their own business and leave her friends alone? Maybe some of these stupid "gimmicks" depended on rumour-spreading, but did it have to be so easy? It wasn't just Jun; she'd been hearing more and more people talk about Tsumugi and Azusa too.

And most hurtful of all... why could the club _still_ not shake this reputation for being lazy and shiftless? It wasn't true! They _were_ trying!

Nodoka leaned over. "Take it easy, Mio. Try not to listen to them."

"It's not fair!" Mio struggled to rub the tears out of her eyes under her glasses.

"You should take those off," said Nodoka. "They'll steam up if you cry in them."

The bassist took her advice. "Th-thank you..."

"No problem. You're new at wearing glasses." She smiled. "Well, except for the time you stole mine."

Mio still didn't remember that happening, but she was too upset to argue. She took deep breaths and tried to clear her mind. After a few minutes, she managed to get her tears under control. She glanced at the three gossippers again; she was still hurt and angry, but she could handle it now.

Nodoka wiped off Mio's glasses with a cleaning cloth. "Here. This is the other reason to take them off when you cry — putting them back on will make you feel better."

Gratefully, Mio took them from her. "I'm surprised _you_ know that, Nodoka," she said. "I can't really picture you crying..."

She smiled again. "I'm not made of stone, you know."

Mio put the glasses back on. As it happened, her gaze fell on those same three girls again, still chatting.

Her eyes burned — this time with cold, focused anger.

She reached for her lunchbox and took something out. Nodoka raised an eyebrow. "Mio, what are you –"

"Look!" said the bassist, pointing at the window. "Isn't that Ami Kawashima, the idol?"

"Where? WHERE?" Half the class leapt to the window to see, including the three gossippers. They looked, and kept looking for a good two minutes before Mio wandered over and said, "Oh, sorry. It was just a bird."

For the next couple of days, the trio spent less time gossipping and more trying to figure out who had dumped grape juice in their backpacks.

* * *

**_7 Days to Regionals_**

_"Status report, Stardate 54265.8! Target Prime has insisted on longer practices from now on! She's also narrowed down our choices for Regionals to a few possibilities! They're all by some old 80s band called Model T!"_

Ms. Yamasu had never heard of them. Or Stardates. And what kind of jazz musician considered an 80s group "old"?

_"Target M is still trying to write her own songs! I don't think she'll be done in time, though! She's got one about paper airplanes that's about half finished, but the others don't seem to like it much!"_

Yamasu could actually hear the exclamation points. Was there anything that didn't excite this kid?

_"The really weird part is Target Zero! She's been a slightly different shade of brown every day for the last week! I've got a slideshow you can look at tomorrow!"_

Yamasu rolled her eyes (_that_, at least, was easier to get away with over the phone). This was Jun's idea of sinister goings-on? What exactly did she think someone could accomplish that way? And how close must she have been looking at "Target Zero" to even notice?

_"This concludes today's report! Any new instructions, Mein Herr?"_

"Never, ever call me in the bathtub again."

_"How will I know?"_

"Any time you don't see me face to face, assume I'm in the bathtub."

_"Understood! From now on I'll come to your house and report in person! Over and out!"_

Jun hung up. Ms. Yamasu sank below the surface of the water and didn't emerge for half an hour.

* * *

**_6 Days to Regionals_**

It had been many years since Tsumugi had believed in the Tooth Fairy. Consequently, it had been many years since Mrs. Kotobuki had last snuck into her daughter's bedroom in the middle of the night. She didn't feel good about it, but there was no choice.

Tsumugi had to be faking. She _had_ to be. And the only way to confirm that for herself and get back her peace of mind was to find the evidence.

Moving as quietly as possible, Mrs. Kotobuki searched through Tsumugi's drawers with a flashlight. She wasn't really expecting to find the hypothetical belly pouch in there, but it would save her from having to take the next step. Unfortunately, there was nothing to be found but neatly folded clothes. She reluctantly turned her flashlight on the bed, avoiding Tsumugi's eyes.

There it was... an unmistakable lump in the sheets. Whatever Tsumugi was wearing, she wasn't even taking it off to sleep. Her mother crept closer. She dreaded seeing this, but she had to know.

Slowly, carefully, she reached for the blanket draped over Tsumugi. And...

No. She couldn't do it. She just couldn't.

Tsumugi was her daughter. If she was happy, if she said there was nothing wrong, Mrs. Kotobuki _had_ to at least try to believe her. Invading her privacy like this would be the ultimate proof of mistrust. She couldn't do it — not until the evidence made it truly _impossible_ to believe Tsumugi.

She snuck back out of the room undetected. _I'll trust you a little longer, Tsumugi,_ she thought. _Please... don't prove me wrong._

A moment later, Tsumugi rolled over in her sleep. Arms wrapped tightly around her stomach, she mumbled "Meanie."

* * *

**_5 Days to Regionals_**

_"Hello. You've reached the Hirasawa family. We're very sorry we can't answer you right now. Please leave a message so that we can call you back. (BEEP)"_

"Yui! I can tell that's Ui's voice on your machine! Are you the older sister or aren't ya? Take charge! Anyway, look, we're all gettin' worried here. Have you told –"

_"(BEEP) No more space for messages."_

Ritsu sighed. She'd have to remind herself to ask tomorrow. Fortunately, her memory was famous around the world. When something was important, she _never_ forgot it. Like her dad always said, she had a mind like a... a sieve, was it? Something like that.

Time to get to work. She hadn't mentioned this to Mio, but she'd decided to work on the Mecha-Brontosaurus song again — _she_ still thought it was an awesome idea, dangit. She dug through the drawer for her most recent lyrics.

As she searched, her phone rang. It was Mio, unsurprisingly. "Heya."

_"Ritsu! Ritsuuuuu!"_

Oh great. "What's the matter?"

_"I'm having so much trouble with these songs! Why did I ever think paper airplanes would work?"_

"So you've decided to fold on that one?"

_"That's not funny! Say something helpful!"_

"Uh..." Ritsu tried to remember some dramatic manga dialogue. "Mio, I... believe in the you that, uh, believes in you. Do your best! Totally!"

_"I feel so much better now."_

"Hey, if you want great oratory, gimme some prep time. Just don't give up, okay? I know you can write something better than this P-Module stuff."

_"I know! I feel like I'm bursting with words, but I can't get them out! If I just had the right subject... something I could really connect to!"_

Ritsu was about to suggest rice bowls (and then regret it) when she finally found a sheet of paper. She took it out only to find that it wasn't lyrics. It was a form... one that read across the top, REGIONALS COMPETITOR APPLICATION.

Below that, in even larger print so it couldn't be missed, was the due date. Ritsu looked at her calendar and back. She did the math twice over. There was no getting around it — this form had been due a month ago.

"Hey Mio," she said, "what's a sieve?"

* * *

**_4 Days to Regionals_**

It was time. There was no way she could put it off any longer.

Azusa got on the family computer and did some research. She found the nearest beach. It was too far to take the bus, but she could get there by train. She'd have to make it a day trip. It would be tricky, but doable.

She was out of other options. The tan cream wasn't working at all — too much of it looked fake, but any less just looked strange. Tanning studios wouldn't take her when they heard how easily she burned. There was nothing left but the old-fashioned way... and in winter, when UV levels were low, it would take a lot of exposure.

Okay. Plan made. Get the tickets tomorrow, travel the next day. Stay out as long as it takes. And if at all possible, do these things without Jun notici–

The cell phone interrupted her concentration. Azusa opened it to see a text message from Jun: _Hey hey hey! Whatcha up to?_

She shuddered. That last part was going to be hard.

* * *

**_3 Days to Regionals_**

Practice was finally over. Mio sighed with relief; she was about P-Modelled out. Bad enough that she was getting nowhere with her own songs, but could they really not cover anything better than 20-year-old synth-rock?

Jun stopped her as she was putting her bass away. "Senior, I've been meaning to ask... how would you, as an expert, rate my performance?"

"Oh, you're getting better all the time."

"Can you be more specific? I've prepared a rubric!" She showed Mio a sheet of carefully organized categories.

"Um... you want me to rate you on _all_ these things?"

"On a scale from 1 to 100. 1 is 'could be better' and 100 is 'at least twice as good as I am'. Don't worry! I don't expect to get 100 for all of them!"

Through Sawako's glasses, Mio gave Jun a look that spoke of many, many 1s.

Azusa took the opportunity to approach Sawako. "Teacher, I won't be here tomorrow."

"What? Why not?"

She pointed at her face.

"Oh. All right, good luck."

"I'll be sure to — OOF!" As usual, Yui had tackled her.

Meanwhile, Ritsu tugged Tsumugi to one side. "Quick question. How fast can you find me another six-girl band in our category at Regionals?"

"It is already done."

"Yeah, I know it's a weird re– what?"

Tsumugi smiled pleasantly. "I noticed some time ago that we were not listed on the event's website. I have found an appropriate substitute and made arrangements."

"You're the best, Mugi! You're one in a zillion!" Ritsu reached out to hug her friend. This proved impossible to do from the front, so she switched to the side.

Azusa was still trapped on the floor under Yui. "Senior..."

"Azu-nyaaaaaan!"

"Senior, I can't breathe. Why are you so cuddly lately?"

A tear came to Yui's eye. "My Azu-nyan is all I have left..."

"Is this the thing Mio told me about? That guy you saw for all of ten seconds?"

"_We were soulmates!_"

Jun took a look at the two hugging scenes, then shrugged. She launched herself at Mio. "When in Rome!"

Ui gave Sawako a significant look.

"No," said the teacher.

* * *

**_2 Days to Regionals_**

The beach was mercifully empty. There was no snow, but in this cold, clammy weather, who would go play by the water?

_Who indeed,_ thought Azusa ruefully. She spread out her beach blanket, checked one more time to make sure no one was looking, and then stripped down to her bathing suit.

This was her duty. She was doing her part for the club. As bizarre and embarrassing as it was, she refused to weaken. Ms. Sawako had finally gotten serious, and Azusa wouldn't be the one to let her down.

She lay down on the blanket and looked up at the sky. "All right, Mr. Sun. Shine down on me."

Hmm... maybe she could count that as her solo.

* * *

In the club room, one hour of P-Model practice became two, then three. Each time they finished a song, the band members looked at each other with increasing frustration and worry. It was finally sinking in on them. Regionals was the day after tomorrow, and they... well...

"You suck," said Sawako, fuming.

No one argued. It was obvious. They weren't ready.

"You know what this means, right? It's all for nothing. All my planning, all our meetings, all the trouble you went to — for your gimmicks, that is, since you _obviously_ haven't been practicing. You've slacked off! All of you! At the one time it was most important not to!"

Yui said, "Sawa-chan –"

"NO! Don't you dare be familiar with me! You little runts have destroyed my career! You blackmailed me into being your club advisor and then you couldn't even be a half-decent club! You easygoing, unmotivated, irresponsible, _lazy_ children are going to get me _fired!_"

The teacher slumped into a chair. Several band members were on the verge of tears... but what could they say? Sawako was saying hurtful things, but none of them were outright untrue; it was just a matter of degree. And nobody blamed her for being upset when she had the most to lose.

After a few minutes, Sawako suddenly laughed. "You know what, girls? Maybe this is for the best."

"H-how so?" asked Mio.

"You deserve to lose your club. And you know what I deserve? A life on Easy Street! Who needs some high school teaching job? You think this was my goal in life? I wasn't born to work nine to five!"

"But..."

"Forget Regionals. I'm just gonna rope Tetsuo in! If I marry him, I'll never have to work again! He'll get a pretty housewife like every guy wants, and I'll be set for life!"

Mio panicked. "Teacher, you can't!"

"Why not? We love each other! _He_ won't let me down like you underachievers!"

"But Tsumugi said –"

"Forget it! Forget Regionals! Forget all of you! _I quit!_"

Sawako grabbed her purse and stormed out. She slammed the music room door so hard that everyone in the school could hear it.

The club members traded looks of shock and disbelief.

There was a long silence.

"Well, so much for light music," said Ritsu. "Wanna try starting a hockey team?"

* * *

**Next: Regionals' Eve**

[A/N: Pity... I was really hoping to get this story done in time for the Season 2 finale of that show I keep pretending I haven't heard of. I did finish my _Ai Yori Aoshi_ fic, so go read that. And then come back for the penultimate chapter — secrets will be revealed!] 


	6. Turning Tables

Yui was in tears. Her sister was struggling to find words of consolation. Tsumugi was silent, her thoughts a mystery. Jun was in a panic. Ritsu was cracking jokes to try and break the tension - and distract herself from her own dismay.

And behind Mio's unblinking eyes, a war was being waged.

Everything she knew had just dropped out from under her. Ms. Sawako had given up on the club. They wouldn't be going to Regionals anymore. After-School Tea Time, the band and the concept, were finished. Mio's every instinct said to curl up and hide - find a nice dark corner to cry in until things got better.

But she was a founding member and the lead songwriter of this band. Yui and the first-years looked up to her. Tsumugi respected her. Ritsu might be club president, but she couldn't hold things together on her own.

And above all... this wasn't some tragic accident. This was an _outrage_.

"We're not giving up," Mio announced.

The others turned. "Wh-what?" said Yui. "Sawa-chan said -"

"She's upset. We can understand that. And if she gives up, that's her choice. But she does _not_ have the right to give up on our behalf."

"Mio..." said Tsumugi.

"We're going to Regionals. It's _happening_. We've all put way too much into this to back out now. If Ms. Sawako thinks we can't do it, let's prove her wrong!"

"Look, I'm behind ya," said Ritsu, "but determination alone won't fix this. How are we supposed to get in without our supervisor?"

"Ms. Sawako can still change her mind," said Tsumugi.

Mio thought. "Maybe so, but we can't count on that. We need a backup."

"Ms. Yamasu!" said Jun. "She's the jazz club supervisor! I bet she'd be willing to fill in!"

"We c-could try our homeroom teacher," suggested Yui, starting to feel a bit better.

Mio nodded. "Both good ideas. I'll try my teacher too."

"And if they all say no?" asked Ritsu. "Who do we ask next, the cheerleading coach?"

"For now, let's assume one of those three will accept. We don't have time to spend all day asking teachers. Ask me why."

"Why? Why? _Why?_" asked Jun.

"Because starting at noon tomorrow, we're practicing _all day_. We all know we need it. Just this once, we're putting class second."

"Can we do that?" asked Yui. "Won't we get arrested?"

"You probably got that idea from American television," Tsumugi said. "High school students here in Japan are under no actual obligation to atte-"

"SHHHH!"

Ritsu was too late. A huge grin was spreading across Yui's face. "_Really?_"

"Whatever the rules say, I don't think our parents will let you stop going to class," said Ui.

"But they don't have to kn-"

"I won't either, Big Sister."

"Aw."

Mio gave Ritsu a surprised look: _Ui actually puts her foot down sometimes?_ Ritsu just rolled her eyes: _If Satoshi ever tried that with me, I'd put my foot down where the sun don't shine._

"What about now?" asked Jun. "What do we do right now?"

"We go home and rest up," said Mio. "The next two days are going to be our hardest ever. Take this last opportunity to unwind. Don't even think about music tonight; just recharge your batteries. You'll need it."

Ritsu grinned. "Eat, drink, and be merry - for tomorrow we jam."

"Exactly. Get going, girls!"

The band started packing up their instruments. Mio's speech had made a strong impression on everyone. Tsumugi was smiling at how much her friend had sounded like Sawako; Jun was moving with military precision; Yui, having paid extra attention to the part about eating and jam, was eager to get home and make some toast.

After the others were gone, Ritsu clapped Mio on the back. "Attagirl! I knew you had a little leadership in ya!"

The bassist smiled gratefully. "I couldn't have done it without knowing you'd support me."

"No problemo! This is just the beginning, baby! With that charisma and that talent and those _knockers_, you've got the world on a string!"

_Does she always have to bring that up?_ Mio decided to return a bit of her annoyance. "Of course, you'd think the _club president_ would be the one to step up..."

"Hey." Ritsu mock-glared at her. "Don't get uppity. I'm still president. I just felt like giving you a chance to be the hero for novelty's sake."

The two of them headed out. As they loaded Ritsu's upstairs wheelchair in the "washroom", the drummer said, "Arrrgh. Maybe we shouldn'ta fought it after all. I was _this_ close to being rid of the stupid chair."

"We couldn't quit the gimmicks that suddenly anyway."

"Look who's talkin'. You didn't even do yours today."

"What?" Mio felt her nose - it was true. "I can't believe this! I keep forgetting them!"

"Meant to tell you earlier. Y'know, you better hope you never _really_ need glasses. Your brain's not wired for it."

Embarrassed, Mio dug out the glasses and put them on. And at that very moment, the other shoe dropped. Everything that had just happened, all the panic she'd been holding back, suddenly burst to the surface.

"R-Ritsu..."

"Gimme a sec. These casts are a pain in -"

"_Ritsu!_"

The drummer turned. All of a sudden, Mio was a complete disaster. Tears were pouring down her face. She looked equal parts terrified, furious, and crushed.

"Maybe you better take those back off," said Ritsu.

* * *

In her apartment, Sawako poured herself a glass of wine and dialed Tetsuo's number.

_"Hello?"_

"Dahhhling..."

_"Oh, it's you. What's up?"_

"Remember that restaurant you were going to take me to on the weekend? We're going tomorrow instead. Five o'clock."

_"What? But I have, um, a meeting..."_

"Cancel it. This can't wait."

_"But... but the reservation! We can't make a new one on such short -"_

"I called and got it changed. They said it was no problem."

_"...Um. Well, I guess I can move the meeting. If it's THAT important."_

"Perfect. See you then!"

Sawako sat back and took a long drink. She was already feeling wifely. Before long she would have Tetsuo doing things just because she told him to - no explanation required.

She'd had it all wrong for so long! High school teaching was a dead end. It would leave her following some principal's orders for the rest of her life. She should have quit years ago and put all her effort into finding a man. Oh, the world would _think_ she'd become a subservient housewife, but she would be calling all the shots.

What was so demeaning about never having to slave away for a paycheck again? How could tea after work compare to tea _without_ work? Sawako grinned just thinking about it.

Tomorrow would be the last day of her old life - and the first of her new one. From now on it would be nothing but clear sailing.

She had the world on a string.

* * *

**One Day to Regionals**

The weather was bleak, and even at a distance, Azusa could tell her friends had moods to match. The whole group was standing outside the school conferring... or rather, trying to confer, but having trouble finding the will for it. They looked like puppets with their strings intact, but no one operating them.

The rhythm guitarist jogged up. "I got Mio's message last night," she said. "Is it true? Did Ms. Sawako really quit on us?"

The girls collectively gave her a strange look and said, as one, "Who are _you_?"

Azusa had to smile. At least _one_ thing had gone right.

* * *

It took them a few minutes to fill Azusa in on all the details. When they were done, she scowled. "I can't believe this! We've been doing our best all month, and at the last minute, she abandons us!"

"Sawa-chan didn't seem to think we had been doing our best," countered Tsumugi. "We should have worked harder."

Azusa's immediate instinct was to concede the point. She was a student. It wasn't her place to disagree with a teacher - or a senior in the club, for that matter. But... but dammit, _there were rules_! No matter what your station in life, there were things that were and weren't okay to do.

She'd been forcing herself not to judge Sawako since the day they met. Now the teacher's irresponsibility was coming at everyone else's expense, and Azusa couldn't just let that go.

"No, we didn't slack off," she said. "We worked hard. I mean, look at us! I got a summer tan in the middle of winter!"

Jun said, "What does that have to do with -"

"Nothing. It was just, uh, an example. The point is, we're not the ones in the wrong here. Ms. Sawako is the one who owes _us_ an apology."

"I'll be over here holding my breath," said Ritsu.

Mio put a hand on Azusa's shoulder. "You're right, and that's why we're not giving up. We're going to come back from Regionals with our heads held high - and with a trophy to show everyone who didn't believe in us. But first we need to get there."

"Then we'll need someone to fill in as our supervisor," said Azusa. "Does it have to be a music teacher?"

"Nah. Any teacher's fine," said Ritsu, who had absolutely no idea.

"We're going to ask our homeroom teachers," said Mio. "Can you try yours?"

Azusa thought. "I'll give it a try, but I'm pretty sure Mr. Kanashimi won't be interested."

"Why not?"

"Oh, he's just not the type, you know? He's very serious and businesslike. Kind of boring, really. He's not one for doing extra stuff outside his job description and _what_ is so funny, senior?"

The last part was to Ritsu, who had exploded with laughter. "Sorry," she said, drying her eyes. "I'm just considering the source."

The younger girl's reaction prompted Yui to exclaim, "Azu-puff! You're back!"

Before anyone could remind her to stop noticing things, the bell rang. "Almost class time," said Mio. "Let's get going. Everyone do your best, and be in the club room by noon!"

Ritsu tugged on Jun's sleeve as the others dispersed. "Hey, shorty. You're going to look for Ms. Yamasu in the teachers' office, right?"

"That's the plan!"

"Good." Ritsu took out a paper sign and a roll of scotch tape. "Take this with ya. I think you can tell where it goes."

Jun's face lit up. "Sneaky! But why bother?"

"Call it insurance. Now get goin'."

"Right!" She glanced at the wheelchair, then at the stairs. "Wait, the others left. How are you -"

"Run, my minion! Run like the wind!"

She did. Ritsu breathed a quick sigh of relief and went to hide the chair. After a month of this, she'd used up all her good excuses.

* * *

Ms. Yamasu wasn't a homeroom teacher, so she spent her early mornings in the office. Today she'd been the first to arrive. Principal Yamada showed up a bit later; Yamasu exchanged greetings with him, and he entered his private office. Only then did she notice that Jun had snuck in after him.

"Big news, Herr Commandant!" said the bassist.

Yamasu sighed, but listened; she'd decided it would be only fair to pay attention to Jun today, with Regionals just one day away. "Go ahead."

"Target Prime is quitting! Last night she told us all we suck and walked out!"

"Really?" Ms. Yamasu knew Sawako wasn't quite the angel she pretended to be, but she'd never have expected her to let her students down.

"Uh huh! So now we're stuck! We can't go to Regionals without a supervisor!"

"I see. Do the others have a plan?"

"Yeah! Target M said we should ask other teachers to fill in! I suggested you right away! You're a music teacher and everything! How 'bout it, Sergeant-Major?"

Yamasu stared in confusion. "What?"

"It's another rank! American, I thi-"

"Not that. Jun, why are you doing this?"

"We need a supervisor or we can't go to Regionals!"

"Isn't that what you _wanted_?"

Jun's face suddenly went blank. She looked like a cartoon character about to plummet into a canyon.

"You _did_ join the club to sabotage it, didn't you? At what point did that stop being the plan?"

"Uh, I... I..."

"In fact, I've been meaning to ask - what have you actually been doing this whole time? You make reports to me every day telling me what the band is doing, but you don't do anything different yourself. You just go to the practices and have lunch with 'Target Zero'."

"It's... research! Information-gathering! I need all the facts to plan my strike!"

"And when will this 'strike' happen? You're out of time. If they hadn't sabotaged _themselves_, they'd be all set for Regionals."

The student opened her mouth, but nothing came out.

"Let me tell you what happened, Jun. It happens to spies all the time. You became your mask."

"Huh?"

Yamasu allowed herself a smirk; Jun's love of espionage clearly didn't extend to knowing anything about it. "Have you heard the expression 'fake it till you make it'? That's what happened. You did your job too well. Think about it - if you had joined the club for real, what would you have done differently?"

"But... but I had to convince them! I had to pretend I was a real member!"

"No, Jun. You _are_ a real member. They sucked you in."

Tears were appearing in Jun's eyes. "I've been trying! I _have_!"

"I'm sure you had the best intentions." (Hmm... that was a strange thing to say about treachery.) "I think you just wound up having too much fun. Both your best friends are in the club, right?"

"Ui's just a groupie!"

"And that older bassist you admire is there too. It's a good place for you, Jun. You should forget this spy business and just enjoy yourself."

"NO!" Jun shouted, startling Ms. Yamasu. "Never! I'm not a failure! I _will_ sabotage them! I'll turn that club _inside out_!"

She ran out of the room. Just before the door could close, she popped her head back in to say, "And by the way, you _suck_ for doubting me!"

"Is that any way to talk to your Commandant?"

Jun left. Again, just before the door could close, she popped back in, saying "Forgot something." She walked right past Ms. Yamasu's desk this time, instead going for Principal Yamada's office. She looked at him through the window, waved, and _then_ left.

_That was weird,_ the teacher thought. But she'd spent more than enough time psychoanalyzing some idiot freshman this morning. She had work to do.

Hmm... funny how she hadn't noticed that sign on the principal's door before.

* * *

In her high school days, Ms. Kawasumi had been in all the best clubs. She ran the school newspaper. She was the princess of tennis. The orchestra and the drama club fought over her. You name it, she was in it.

But that wasn't really something she did for fun. It was all part of being the queen of the school; she liked the prestige, so she did what was required to maintain it. That world was behind her now. Kawasumi's adult life wasn't so glamorous - and while high school teaching had never exactly been her dream, she didn't miss the pressure of the spotlight.

In short, she was no longer a club person. But she didn't need to tell Ritsu the whole backstory. All she had to say was, "No. Sorry."

"Aw, come on!"

"No. Now take your seat. You're eating into class time."

Ritsu feigned outrage. "_Seat_, huh? Way to mock the disabled!"

"You know very well what I meant."

"Yeah, you meant to offend! I, _the disabled_, am deeply offended by your offensiveness! S'okay though - come to Regionals and I won't blacklist you."

Kawasumi sighed. "Are you really this eager for more detention?"

"I just don't understand how you can turn your back on us! Oh wait, I can. You're not in a _wheelchair_. You can just get up and turn around."

"And you can _see_ which way we're coming from and face the opposite!" added Yui, doing her best to look scornful.

"Let me clear something up for you two," said the teacher. "_You are not disabled._ You have temporary medical conditions that have almost run their course. Tainaka, you've been bragging that 'cast-away day' is this week. Hirasawa, your vision is obviously coming back - I heard you compliment Tachibana on her hairdo as I came in."

"It _feels_ like a nice hairdo!" Yui protested, grabbing Himeko's head for emphasis.

"I have been very patient this month. With the chair, with the blindness, with Kotobuki's... with _Kotobuki_. Enough is enough. Go to your desk."

Ritsu sighed angrily. "Wevs. Yui, push me."

"Um, Ricchan -"

"_Push me, woman!_"

Yui pushed Ritsu into a wall.

"Right. Blind. Fine, I'll drive."

When all the light music clubbers were finally in position for class, Ms. Kawasumi began the lesson. "Who remembers what we learned last time?"

"Intolerance," said Ritsu.

She spent the rest of the period holding buckets of water over the sides of her chair.

* * *

Mio was fuming. She'd been unable to talk to her homeroom teacher until lunchtime, and he'd done nothing but waste her time. They'd discussed the situation for ten minutes before he concluded, apologetically, that he couldn't help. It was nice that he sympathized, but couldn't he have just said no at the start?

Now Mio was late for the 12:00 deadline she herself had set. Arrrgh.

When she was just outside the door, she paused. Was that music she was hearing? No, surely not. Even in this dire situation, her bandmates didn't have the work ethic to start by themse-

"Not bad," she heard Ritsu say. "Let's go again from the top. One, two, three, four!"

_kssh kssh BAdadum BAdadum_

"Beware his swinging razors! Beware his forehead-lasers! Just run away, you wuss! You'll never stand a chance against the Mecha-Brontosaurus!"

Oh, this was _not_ happening. Mio practically shoved the door open. "Stop that RIGHT NOW!"

Startled by her entrance, everyone stopped playing. And it really was everyone - the whole band was present and accounted for. Ritsu laughed nervously. "Uh, hey there, hot stuff! Have I told you lately how good those glasses look on -"

"You're wasting time! We need to practise our songs for Regionals, not... mindless noise!"

"Oh, like there's a difference. Have you _listened_ to this M-Paddle stuff?"

"P-Model! And whether it's good isn't the point. Regionals is _tomorrow_. We don't have time to learn something new!"

"It's not new," said Yui. "We've been -"

"- EATING!" Ritsu interrupted. "We've been eating! Cookies! With, uh, barbecue sauce! Silly Yui, always thinking about food!"

Yui looked surprised. "There was barbecue sauce?"

Both girls went silent as Mio loomed over them. "What were you really starting to say, Yui?"

The guitarist glanced apologetically at Ritsu. "It was supposed to be a secret. We've been trying out Ricchan's song this week whenever you weren't around."

"You take kinda long bathroom breaks," Jun added by way of explanation.

Rage was now coming off Mio in waves. She spun on Ritsu. "You've been using _practice time_ to work on that CRAP?"

"Take it easy!" said the drummer, ducking instinctively. "It was just for little breaks! Sawa-chan didn't mind!"

"Don't you even _try_ lying to me, Ritsu! This was all about you! You wanted to stick one to me! I was taking this band too seriously for you, and you couldn't take it! You just HAD to undercut me!"

"That's not it!"

"_Liar!_ You said you supported me! Know what your support feels like? THIS!" Mio lunged forward and slugged Ritsu in the jaw.

The drummer fell back, clutching her chin. "Owwwww!"

Yui was getting upset now. "That's not funny, Mio! Stop it!"

"But it's _true!_" shouted the bassist, spinning on Yui. "She _always_ undercuts me! She talks us out of practicing! She goes along with Sawa-chan's stupid ideas! It's her fault I'm even in this club, but she makes me carry all the weight!"

Azusa said, "Senior, please try to calm -"

"NO! She's had this coming for a _long_ time!" Mio grabbed Jun's bass and swung it at the fallen percussionist, missing by inches.

"Hey!" said Jun, trying to grab her instrument back.

Mio didn't let her. She leveled the bass at Ritsu again. "Say, 'hot stuff', you really love that crazy band that goes around smashing their instruments, right? After all, you sang their song in class when I was _refusing to do that and needed your help_!"

"I..."

She raised the bass, aiming at Ritsu's drum set. "Well hey, I'm willing to learn! Let's see if smashing stuff is fun!"

Ritsu struggled to speak. "M-Mugi... Plan Gamma..."

Tsumugi was already moving. Just before the weapon came down, she grabbed Mio's borrowed glasses and yanked them off her face.

For a long moment, everyone froze. Then, finally, Mio dropped to her knees and let go of the bass (which Jun quickly took back). Tears were in her eyes. "What... what was I doing?"

"You were just upset," said Tsumugi, hugging her. "It'll be all right now."

"Ritsu... is she..."

"Fine," said the drummer, on her feet now. "Gonna get you back for this later, though."

Jun looked back and forth at the parties involved. "I don't get it. What just happened?"

"Rage blackout," said Ritsu. "She gets 'em every full moon. Go to the nurse's office and grab her an aspirin, wouldja?"

"Right!" Jun ran off.

Azusa raised an eyebrow. "What _really_ just happened?"

"I tricked Jun into doing something stupid. It's becomin' a hobby of mine."

"I mean with the fight."

"Right." Ritsu took the glasses from Tsumugi. "Mio, I think you've been wearing these things backwards."

"H-huh?"

"Sawa-chan wears these to look all sweet and ladylike, right? I think they have the opposite effect on you. You lose that thin veneer of discipline that keeps you from flipping out non-stop."

"That's ridiculous!"

She gestured at the others. "We've all noticed, Mio. You've been way more unbalanced since you started wearing 'em."

"Nodoka is very worried about you," said Ui. Yui nodded firmly.

"I... I never noticed..."

_Of course you didn't,_ thought Ritsu. When Mio got wrapped up in her own frustration, nothing else could get through to her. The rest of the world could have been burning down for all the difference it would have made.

"I'm sorry, everyone. I'll... I'll go..."

"NO!" Ritsu shouted. The last thing they needed right now was for Mio to crawl into some dark corner and grow mushrooms. "Relax. Everything'll be fine. Forget all this happened and come practice with us."

"O...okay."

Azusa raised a hand. "Wait, wait, wait. Ritsu, are you serious? I mean, _really_ serious? A pair of magic glasses made Mio crazy?"

Ritsu stared at her. "_No_, stupid. Nobody said anything about magic. It just stresses her out to wear 'em."

"Oh." Embarrassed, Azusa busied herself with her tuning pegs.

_Yeesh_, thought Ritsu. She helped Mio collect herself. The others got ready, and before long, everyone was all set to practise again.

Just in time, Jun came back in. "Crisis de-crisised," Ritsu told her. "Come on over and let's get jammin'. Oh, did ya get the aspirin?"

Jun glared at her. "The nurse said you were making stuff up."

"Aw, what does she know?"

* * *

Ms. Yamasu looked up as, for the third time that morning, Sawako marched in like an actress who'd been told to play this scene extra-broad. "Okay! _This_ time he must be -"

Yamasu shook her head and pointed at Principal Yamada's closed door.

"_Still?_ Come on, this is ridiculous! I can't keep coming back here all day!"

"Then don't. Leave him a message."

Sawako pouted. "I really want to see the look on his face."

"Well, it looks like he's booked right now. Just do it tomorrow. It's not like you'll be busy with Regionals."

"I guess that'll have to do," she said, sighing. "Fine. I can use the time to get ready for my big date."

_Another one?_ Yamasu was sick to death of hearing about Sawako's dates. It must be nice to have that much free time.

"Tomorrow it is," said Sawako, heading out. "Don't you dare tell him yourself, Megumi!"

Yamasu got back to work. The warning had been thoroughly unnecessary. She wouldn't have played Sawako's carrier pigeon for money.

A few minutes later, Principal Yamada exited his office to take a late lunch. He shut his door... and then stared at it. "How long has this 'Do Not Disturb' sign been here?" he asked Yamasu.

"So you _didn't_ put it there?" She frowned. "It must have been Jun."

"The student who waved at me?"

"Yes. I'm sorry, sir, I wasn't sure."

He thought, then shrugged his shoulders. "I think I may keep it. I've never particularly _liked_ being disturbed."

* * *

The bell rang to signal the end of afternoon classes, and good students throughout the school got ready to head home. The light music club members, of course, were not being good students today. Even so, Mio decided to take advantage of the interruption. "Let's take a quick break," she said.

Both Yui and Azusa were surprised to hear that suggestion from their most serious colleague. Ritsu wasn't - she knew what Mio was thinking. They nodded to each other in acknowledgment.

It was better. Not perfect, not by a long shot. But _better_. Their sound was finally starting to come together.

Jun took a big seventh-inning stretch. "Y'know what?" she said. "I've realized something. These songs are kinda lame."

"I preferred the ones you used to play," Ui agreed.

Mio sighed; it was true, of course, but what could they do? "Let's just hope Sawa-chan was right and the judges are familiar with this music."

"Maybe we should hope they're _not_," said Jun. "Who knows? Maybe we're butchering it."

"Nah," said Ritsu. "I've been listening to some of their albums. We don't sound the same, but we're close enough."

Azusa raised an eyebrow. "I couldn't find them at the store. How did you get these albums?"

"Legally, she said with a wink," said Ritsu.

Mio rolled her eyes. "The point is, we're almost out of time. We have to make the best of -"

She was cut off by the loudest gasp she had ever heard.

"Oww!" said Ritsu, clutching the side of her head like she'd just blown an eardrum. "What was _that_?"

Everyone looked around. It was easy to find the source: Yui, frozen in place with her mouth agape. Her expression was somewhere between shock and ecstasy. And her finger was pointing...

...at the tea table, which Tsumugi had just laid out with a full complement of tea and treats.

Ritsu and Azusa traded a look. This would be the first time in a month, and they wanted it. They wanted it _bad_. But was there any hope of persuading Mio to go along with -

They blinked. Mio was already at the table, sipping a cup of tea.

"Thank you, Mugi. It's delicious," she said. She looked at the others and asked, "Are you coming?"

* * *

The only small mercy had been that today wasn't a jazz band practice day. Everything else had been hell. Yamasu couldn't remember the last time she'd had to endure so many stupid questions from her students and listen to so much meaningless chatter in one afternoon.

Somehow today's noise was resonating in her head much more painfully than usual. Maybe it had been a mistake to shotgun her entire flask of vodka over lunch.

Still, at least it was over. She opened the front door and -

"MEGUMI!"

Yamasu respected Principal Yamada, but she really wished he wouldn't do that all the time. "Yes, sir?"

"I see you're on your way. I won't keep you long. I just have a suggestion to make."

_Uh oh. Did he finally notice the flask?_

"As you know, Sawako's light music club is competing tomorrow at Regionals. Their decision to do so has been quite good for the members' discipline. They have been applying themselves better, even in the face of some alarming injuries."

"Okay." Yamasu very quickly closed, rolled, and opened her eyes. It was risky in front of her boss, but she needed to let a little irritation out. Did _everyone's_ life revolve around that club?

"I think their example is a good one for other students to follow," continued Principal Yamada. "In particular, your jazz band is showing signs of lassitude."

"What?"

"I have heard that the practices often end early. Members express satisfaction with what you have described as fairly mediocre musicianship. One of your students even quit the club to join Sawako's."

"Now wait a -!"

"I'm not accusing _you_ of poor behaviour, but you do seem to allow a bit too much of it from your club. I think you might be wise to follow Sawako's example. Look for a competition to enter - perhaps something more specific to jazz than Regionals."

"I..."

"That's all. Have a pleasant evening." Principal Yamada went ahead through the door.

Yamasu stood alone, silent, disbelieving. Had she really just been told to put her terrible club up against actual jazz bands? Because they weren't measuring up to _Sawako's_ club? The one which, if Jun was to be believed, could barely decide what to play and was always "up to something"? For God's sake, Sawako had just quit on them!

A jazz competition. Yamasu could think of several, but they had _standards_. If they didn't want to be laughed off the stage, the club would have to train hard. She'd need to have more practices with them. A lot more.

The worst part of her life had just become the biggest. _And her flask was empty._

"Megumi? Are you all right?"

It was Ms. Kawasumi on her way out. Yamasu grabbed her by the upper arm. "You have your car today, right?"

"Y-yes..."

"Good. Let's go." She tugged the other teacher along.

"Wait! Where are we going?"

"The first bar we see. We leave when they kick us out."

"Now hold on here! Why do you need me for this?"

"Because," said Yamasu, "you're carrying me out the door."

* * *

Sawako peeked around the corner. Yep, Tetsuo was already seated, waiting for her to arrive. She giggled to herself in anticipation.

This would be the delicious part - waiting to make her move. Who said "fashionably late" was only for parties? She was going to enjoy watching him stew for a while. It would reinforce the fact that she was in full control of -

"Sawako? Was that you?"

Or, of course, he could see her and make the whole thing pointless. She'd have to work on her stealth.

"Hi, Tetsuo," she said, stepping out into the open as nonchalantly as she could.

Tetsuo pulled her chair out for her. "Hi. You look great."

"Why, _thank_ you, dear." She did, too. It had taken her most of the afternoon to find a dress that was glamorous but still within her price range. Sawako liked to think she had a certain appeal even in casual wear, but this outfit should be enough to make her irresistible.

Of course, she couldn't compete with Tetsuo in this category. Tonight she was dressed to the nines, but he was always dressed to the tens. Sawako had never seen him looking less than perfect - it was almost eerie. He winked at her as he lifted his wine glass, and she nearly swooned at the sheer _style_.

A grin crossed her face. All this was hers, and she was about to seal the deal. She raised her own glass in response.

Tetsuo owned the world - and by the time this meal was over, Sawako would own _him_.

The bread arrived. "Shall we?" asked Tetsuo.

"Sure," she said. "And when we're done eating, I have a little... _proposal_ for you."

* * *

The Zen masters sometimes tell of a monk named Uhiru. He had left society seeking enlightenment, but it still eluded him, and eventually he chose to put the world even farther behind. He built a raft and set out on the sea with no supplies, determined to push beyond the needs of the flesh. Only the harshest possible self-denial could bear the greatest fruit. He would simply float, alone with his mind, for as long as it took to find enlightenment.

Months later, Uhiru returned, though not under his own power; strong winds had blown the raft back to shore. Having gone without water or food the entire time, he was as near death as any living man had ever been. The other monks managed to gradually restore his health. As soon as he was able to speak, they asked if he had found enlightenment on his journey. Yes, said Uhiru, he had experienced a transcendent revelation; but he remembered none of it. All that wisdom had been drowned out by the agony of starvation.

According to the Zen patriarch Mumon, the moral of Uhiru's story is "Enlightenment has no corners; it is a fish only pretending to swim." Modern interpretations vary. Some say Uhiru failed only because he weakened and returned to shore; others, that his desperation to find enlightenment doomed him from the start; others, that the _real_ point of the story is that the human body requires nourishment even if you tell it not to. The debate goes on.

All commentators agree, however, that even Uhiru's first sip of water after all those weeks at sea paled in comparison to the light music club's first sip in a month of Tsumugi's tea.

No words were exchanged in the first few minutes. None were needed. The girls simply drank together and felt their energy return. It was as if they'd only been half alive and hadn't quite realized it. They'd been too distracted to feel a little piece of their souls slipping away.

When the first pot was empty, Tsumugi got the next one going, and the others started in on the treats. The silence between them gave way to something even more welcome: chatter. They made small talk about everything and nothing. Of course, they'd done plenty of talking this month, but not all together; practice time had been strictly for the music. The girls felt almost like this was their first real meeting in weeks. They slipped back into their usual groove as comfortably as into an old pair of shoes.

"It was _this_ big! Bigger!" said Ritsu, holding her hands apart.

"Whoaaaa!" said Yui, open-mouthed.

"And as big around as -"

"_HOLD IT!_"

Everyone turned. It was Jun. They'd completely forgotten she was there.

"Are you _kidding_ me?" she said. "_This_ is what you do? I knew you guys were lazy, but _this_?"

"Er... special occasion?" said Ritsu.

"I thought the tea ceremony club kept their stuff here or something! I had no idea you used it yourselves!"

"Everyone needs a break sometimes," Tsumugi put in.

"Ohhh no! Don't pour tea on my leg and tell me it's raining orange pekoe! You do this all the time!"

Mio was starting to worry, but Ritsu gave her an _I'll-handle-this_ wink. "Now how do ya figure that?" she asked Jun. "You've been here for a month and this is the first time we've tea'd up."

"But you didn't _say_ anything about special refreshments... and you're all so obviously _used_ to it... Oh! OH! Oh-ho-ho!" The bassist stood up, pointing a finger. "I know what happened! You got _caught!_"

Mio glared at Ritsu. The drummer shrugged. "Sorry. Thought that would work."

"I'm right, aren't I? I _knew_ there was something funny about this Regionals thing! Somebody found out you were slackers, and you're trying to prove you're not! But you _are_! You're a bunch of faking fakers!"

"Oh, shut up, Jun," said Azusa, casually sipping her tea.

The older girls were startled. They'd never heard her talk like that... but then, they were her seniors. Jun was Azusa's peer in class - and her junior in the club.

"Why should I?" she replied. "I'm not the one with something to defend here!"

"Spare me. I _know_ you. Don't even try to take the moral high ground."

"I have a right to get mad at an irresponsible club!"

"No." Azusa stood up. "_I_ had a right to get mad at an irresponsible club. I did, when I first joined. You know why I had that right? Because _I am responsible_. I want to work hard and accomplish things. We both know _you_ just want to have fun."

"But I -"

"You're scolding your seniors because it makes you feel superior. But don't even try to deny it - you're _thrilled_ to be in a club with free tea and snacks. I just put up with that stuff, but it's right up _your_ alley."

"No! I -"

"You can't judge us, Jun. You're one of us."

The bassist went white. "No! _No!_ NOOOOOOOO!" She ran out of the room.

Ritsu glanced at Mio. "Can't help but feel a bit insulted by _that_ reaction, huh?"

With Jun gone, Azusa remembered there were other people here. She blushed furiously and started bowing. "Sorry! I didn't mean it about just putting up with -"

"S'okay, we know," said Ritsu. "No harm done."

"That was amazing! Azu-nyan is amazing!" said Yui, holding a cupcake out to her.

Azusa blushed again. "No, I was just annoyed with Jun. I shouldn't have been so harsh. I didn't mean to hurt her feelings."

"She'll bounce back," said Mio. "She doesn't seem like the type to take things personally."

"I hope you're right."

Ritsu gave a thumbs-up. "More important, nice speech! Now I know who to call if I ever need somebody yelled at. Didn't know you had it in ya."

Azusa sighed. "It was just something I had to let out. Jun has been so weird lately. She says we're up to something... and okay, we are, but she is too."

Yui cleared her throat, trying to call Azusa's attention to the cupcake.

"I wonder if it has something to do with her jazz club," said Tsumugi.

Azusa thought. "Maybe. I've visited, but I don't know much about it."

"Really?" asked Mio. "I would have expected that club to be your second choice after this one."

"No, I don't like playing jazz guitar. All those quarter tones and improv aren't my style. I hear too much of that stuff at home anyway."

"At home?"

"Yeah, my parents are into -"

"Azu-nyaaaan!" moaned Yui. "My arm is tired!"

"Oh. Sorry." Azusa took the cupcake.

Ritsu smirked at Yui, who had immediately snatched up another one. "I see you weren't too tired to do that."

"Mmph," Yui replied.

"What?"

She swallowed. "They're so good! _So good!_ I can't stop rmmph!"

Mio would normally be getting annoyed at this point, but her bliss was total. "Thank you so much, Mugi," said Mio. "This was just what we needed."

The blonde nodded politely. "Sawa-chan's departure did at least present an opportunity."

"The best part is the taste!" said Yui between cupcakes.

Puzzled, Azusa asked, "Is there a second best?"

"The mmrph," she explained.

"...Right."

"But taste is best! And - mm - I'm luckiest of all! Now that I'm blind, my sense of taste is heightened!"

Ui burst into tears.

"Uh... are you okay?" Azusa asked her.

"B-Big Sister always makes the b-best of things! She's so strong, even when... when terrible things... oh, poor Big Sister!"

Ritsu pounded her fist on the table. "_YUI!_"

"How _could_ you?" Mio agreed, yanking her cupcake away.

"_Seriously_, senior! This is awful!" Azusa scolded.

"Wh-what?" Even with her dark glasses on, it was easy to tell that Yui had no idea what they meant.

"Ui, listen close," said Ritsu after doing a quick shoulder-check to make sure Jun wasn't back yet. "Your sister is _not really blind_. She's just a thoughtless bozo who never got around to telling y-"

"I know," said Ui.

The others blinked. "You do?"

"Yes. Big Sister told me right away."

"Of _course_ I did!" said Yui, snatching back her cupcake indignantly.

Ritsu's head spun. "But... no... what?"

"I would never trick Ui! Why would you think that?"

"Wait," said Mio, rubbing her temples. "I mean, this is good news, but it doesn't make sense. Ui, if you knew all along, why have you been so upset?"

Ui blinked. "Upset?"

"You cry us a river every time Yui sneezes!" Ritsu shouted.

"She's right," said Azusa. "Whenever the subject of Yui's 'blindness' comes up, you get really upset. You've been doing it all month."

"We tried to give Yui the benefit of the doubt," added Mio. "But what else could possibly have been making you so sad?"

"Oh," said Ui. "I understand. Thank you for your concern." She bowed.

Yui was now genuinely alarmed. "You've been sad, Ui? Why?"

"It's not important, Big Sister."

"Yes it is! Tell me!"

Ui lowered her eyes. "It's not your fault. I know you aren't blind. But... every time I see you with those glasses on... it makes me think about how sad it would be if you really _were_."

Ritsu and Mio stared. "You've gotta be kidding," said the drummer.

"This is just how you would look if you were blind, Big Sister. This is how I would help you with your classes. I can't help imagining it..."

"You can tell us you're kidding any time now," Ritsu emphasized.

"I know you're not really blind. I know you're not even pretending to be _permanently_ that way. But the idea of it... it's j-just so... so..." Ui began sobbing again.

Yui practically threw Azusa out of the way to hug her sister. "Poor Ui! I'm so sorry! Everything's okay! After tomorrow I won't even be fake-blind anymore!" She stroked Ui's hair and tried to calm her down.

As the two sisters embraced, lost in catharsis, the others looked on with awe and wonder.

"I don't think I want my own Ui anymore," said Ritsu. "That chick is gonna make some psychiatrist a millionaire."

* * *

Sawako handed her empty plate to the waiter, thoroughly stuffed. "That was amazing," she said to Tetsuo. "You should have had some. Was that salad really enough for you?"

"I had a big meal earlier," he said.

"Oh? Where?"

Tetsuo sighed. "You know, there _was_ a reason we weren't originally going to meet today. You must have heard about the Hanabishi/Sakuraba wedding, right? That was today. Both families are clients of mine, so I was invited. There was a catered reception."

Sawako didn't answer. She'd gone starry-eyed. He waved a hand in front of her. "Sawako?"

"Wedding," she said.

"Yeah. It's a thing people do when they're tired of having fu-"

Sawako grabbed both his hands. "Tetsuo, I quit my job today. I want all my time to be with you."

"Uh. Whoa."

"I had to see you right away. I'm tired of being alone. I have to ask you..."

"Baby, I can't feel my -"

Sawako squeezed harder. "Tetsuo Tsukamoto... will you ask me to marry you?"

Tetsuo went completely white.

"Well, come on," added Sawako. "The _woman_ doesn't propose."

* * *

**Next: The Truth Hurts**

[A/N: I lowballed my chapter count again - there'll be at least two more, maybe three. No offense is intended to the terrible music of P-Model. "Glee"... is that a TV show of some kind?] 


	7. Blame It On the Alcohol

He'd only spoken one word, but it had been enough to bring Sawako's whole world crashing down.

Her heart felt like lead in her chest. She wanted to run and hide somewhere and never come back out. She wanted to crumble away into dust. But most of all, she wanted to know _why_.

Tetsuo straightened his tie awkwardly. "I thought we understood each other, Sawako."

Tears burned in her eyes. "I thought we _loved_ each other."

"See, that's what I mean about understanding." He sighed. "I do love you, Sawako. But there are different kinds of love. There's ours, and then there's the, uh..."

"The _what_? The romantic kind? The marriage kind? Because that's what love _is_, Tetsuo!"

"Let me start over. Marriage... marriage is just a ring and a piece of paper. Some people need those things to make them feel safe. But true love is strong enough on its –"

"Oh, _bunk_! I want that ring and piece of paper! Everyone does!"

Tetsuo signalled a passing waiter and handed over his credit card, muttering, "I don't think we'll be ordering dessert."

"Why don't you want those things too, Tetsuo? Am I not good enough for you? Don't I make you happy?"

"I... I just..." He dropped his face into his hands — and when he raised it, it was red with fury. "Dammit, Sawako, why did you have to do this?"

The teacher almost jumped. She'd never seen Tetsuo angry. He looked like a whole different person.

"This was supposed to be easy!" He pounded his fist. "We were just two adults having a good time together! Why are you suddenly making a mess of it?"

"Oh, is that all I am to you? A 'good time'?"

"Shut up! You know damn well what I mean! We've been having fun together! We never even fought until now! But no, that's not enough for you!"

She returned his glare full force. "You know what, Tetsuo? For a normal person, this isn't some big change in gears. It's the logical next step. People in love _want_ to make it official in front of everybody."

"I don't need this pressure! Back off!"

"No! This isn't just going away! I want us to get married, or I want to hear a damn good reason why not!"

Tetsuo started to button his suit coat. "This is pointless. I'm going home. Call me when –"

The waiter cleared his throat. "I'm sorry to interrupt," he said, "but your card has been declined."

"What?" Tetsuo looked at the receipt the waiter gave him. "I don't understand. I had plenty of room on that card."

Sawako narrowed her eyes. "I'm _not_ paying."

Her boyfriend sighed. "Hang on, I think I have cash," he told the waiter, and started rummaging through his pockets. He tried his pants first, then his jacket, but apparently had no luck; in annoyance, he took the jacket off to dig deeper.

As he searched, Sawako's tear-filled eyes caught a glimpse of something oddly familiar. She slowly narrowed her gaze until she saw it again. And when she did... her whole face changed.

"Tetsuo," she said coldly, "let me see that tag on your suit."

"What? No. I'm — hey!" She'd grabbed it away from him, quick as a panther.

"West End," she read. "Oh, I knew it. I _knew_ it!"

"So what? It's just my tailor."

She slammed the jacket on the table. "I'm a costumer, you bastard! You think you can fool me? West End is a _rental_ service!"

Tetsuo's face went blank. "Um."

"Now why would a _rich_ man be renting a suit? Or getting a credit card rejected? Hmmmm?"

"I. I. Uh. I –"

"You've been FAKING!" screamed Sawako. "You've been _faking your money_!"

Tetsuo was silent as the tomb.

"I see it all now! Everything fits! You keep 'forgetting' your credit card! You never order anything for yourself but salad! Diet, my ass!"

The waiter moved whisper-quietly to another table.

"You never have trouble moving your big important meetings! You never pick me up in the same car twice! You –"

"Take what you can get," said Tetsuo.

"What?"

"You're no prize. The clock is ticking. _Take what you can get._"

Sawako couldn't answer. Her outrage was at war with her shock.

"Sure, you caught me. I'm not rich. I just put on a good show. I do it so I can aim for a higher class of woman — the kind who would never be seen with some car mechanic. But you, Sawako? You're right on the edge of my target zone. If I didn't _like_ you so much, I'd have moved on weeks ago."

"What are you talking about?"

"Look at yourself! You really think you're some princess? You're a failed musician teaching high school. You soak up admiration from your students because you can't get it from anyone else. All you have left are your looks, and those won't last much longer."

"I'm only twenty-eight!"

" 'Only'? Where do you think this is, Paris? No Japanese man wants a woman over 25. You're already looking a little dowdy, and you know it. All you need to make the image complete is a pair of glasses."

"You –!" Sawako couldn't find the words.

"Go ahead, yell at me. Make a scene. Be even _less_ ladylike. You know full well I'm right. You'll never do better than me."

Tears filled her eyes again. "How could you?"

Tetsuo smirked. "Tough love, baby."

"Don't you call me that! It's _over_!"

"Why be so hasty? This can still work. We can forget tonight ever happened. Nobody _else_ knows I'm not rich. I'm still good for your reputation, and I still want you. Just not... you know, formally."

"No!"

"You should be thanking me. I'm willing to forget you screamed at me in public. A real rich man would kick you to the curb."

Sawako stood and hurriedly put her coat on. "I never want to see you again!"

Tetsuo rolled his eyes. "God, have you always been this overdramatic? I guess I'm not the only one who was hiding something."

"Shut up!"

"Hey, just saying. I didn't know you had such an ugly side."

Sawako grabbed Tetsuo by the necktie hard enough to lift him out of his chair. She locked eyes with him and hissed, "You have not BEGUN to see my ugly side."

By the time Tetsuo's vision cleared and he could breathe again, Sawako was long gone.

* * *

The light music club was getting tuned up again when Jun returned. "Heya," said Ritsu. "We almost gave up on you."

She nodded silently and picked up her bass.

"Jun, I'm sorry," said Azusa. "I didn't mean to be so rude."

"Forget it." Her friend didn't look at her.

Mio glanced at the others, unsure how to handle this. Tsumugi gave an elegant little shrug; Ritsu shook her head. There was really nothing to be done but hope their new member would quit sulking after a while.

"Let's start with 'Perspective'," said Mio. "We're getting better at that song. Er... except..."

Yui looked up from tying her own shoelaces together to see everyone staring at her. "What?"

"Except," said Ritsu.

"Am I doing something wrong?"

"You're not doing very well with the vocals," said Mio reluctantly. "You've been missing whole lines."

"You're the exception. Accept it," said Ritsu. Tsumugi giggled at that, so she added, "I've got more. That was just an excerpt."

"Come on, I'm not that bad! I'll show you!" Yui grabbed her guitar and launched into a rip-roaring chorus from one of their P-Model songs. She played for a whole minute, then stopped and took a bow. "See?"

There was silence.

"What? Did I mess up?"

"You could say that," said Ritsu. "You could also say... now let's see if I followed all this correctly... you played the music from 'Art Mania' while singing lyrics that were half from 'White Cigarettes' and half from 'The Farmer in the Dell'."

"In the wrong key," Azusa added. "Sorry, senior."

Yui drooped a bit. "I'll work harder."

"Thank you," said Mio. "Okay, let's get started. Everyone ready?"

The others nodded. Mio gave Ritsu the signal, and she counted them in. "One, two, three, four!"

The band started playing "Perspective." _Not bad so far_, thought Mio. _We'll have to see how we sound on –_

"ARRRRRGGGH!"

The music came to a jumbled halt. Everyone looked around — and saw Jun in a rage. She'd yanked the pickup out of her bass and thrown it across the room.

"This is no good! And you all know it!"

"What's no good?" asked Yui.

"This P-Model stuff! It's not your style! I'm new here and even I can tell!"

Mio sighed. "We've been over this. It's too late to change the plan. We have to play what we know."

"We've only known this stuff for two weeks!"

"Look, little missy," said Ritsu, "I'm gettin' tired of your attitude. Time to learn your place and quit yellin' at your seniors. We're in charge here."

Jun was about to reply, but Yui cut her off. "Ricchan," she said, "say that again."

"We're in charge here?"

"Yeah. _We're_ in charge. _Not Sawa-chan_."

Everyone paused for a moment as this sank in. "Yui is right," said Tsumugi. "It was Sawa-chan who insisted that we should not perform our own music. We no longer have to follow that order."

"And we know our own stuff way better," Ritsu agreed, rubbing her chin. "We've got it down. Yui would even have a chance of gettin' the words right."

"Now hang on," said Azusa. "Let's not be too –"

"No, they're right." Mio stood up taller. "Jun, Yui, you're right. Sawa-chan has no say anymore. We _should_ play our own songs! No more pretending to be something we're not!"

Yui, hearing that last part, gave Ritsu a questioning look and pointed at her dark glasses. The drummer shook her head firmly and pointed at Jun. The gimmicks had to run their course.

"Let's practice for real again!" said Mio, still on a roll. "We have time for two of our songs at Regionals... which ones are the best?"

" 'My Headband'?" suggested Tsumugi. Mio shook her head. She regretted even writing that one.

"My fave was always that one about the dinosaur," said Ritsu with a smirk. Mio glared at her.

"How about 'Fluffy Fluffy Time'?" said Ui, who happened to know that was her sister's favourite.

"Hold it!" said Azusa.

The others turned. _Great,_ thought Ritsu. _I thought she was getting better, but no. Here's where Little Miss Obedient goes all uppity and forces us to –_

"Come on," she continued. "We all know 'My Love is a Stapler' is our most musically interesting number."

Ritsu grinned big and wide. _Welcome back to the good guys' side, kiddo._ "Stapler it is. Let's hit it!"

* * *

"And _then_ there are the brass players! In six years, do you know how many trombonists I've taught? None! Oh, there have been girls _with_ trombones, but they weren't trombonists! Do you know why, Chika?"

Kawasumi sighed. "Why?"

"Because a teddy bear with a gun isn't a rifleman, _that's_ why! And that damn euphonium player! I swear she puts more effort into dyeing her hair than practicing!"

"Right."

Yamasu narrowed her gaze. "You're being rather quiet. Am I boring you by any chance?"

"Uh, no. I'm just a bit distracted by a scientific problem."

"And what problem is that?"

"How are you still _conscious_?"

Yamasu looked at the mountain of empty bottles and glasses on the table and smirked. "It's all about training."

"You can't train your alcohol tolerance!"

"Maybe _you_ can't."

A waitress came by to clear the table. "Would you like the bi–"

"More of everything," said Yamasu.

"O-okay. And for you, ma'am?"

"Ginger ale," Kawasumi ordered, earning a condescending look from her colleague. "What? You brought me as your designated driver!"

"Yeah. Not my designated _anvil._"

Kawasumi stared.

As the waitress took the bottles away, the teachers heard a commotion at the entrance and turned to look.

"LIAR! You're just telling me what I want to hear!"

"Ma'am, all I said was 'Welcome to –' "

"Exactly! I'm not really welcome! You don't even know me! It's just a trick to get me inside!"

Yamasu squinted. "Is that...?"

"It's Sawako," Kawasumi confirmed.

"I've never seen her so upset. You think something happened to her?"

"Could be. Maybe we should go help before she gets herself arrested."

The teachers paused, picturing that.

"Yes, let's help," said Yamasu, a bit regretfully.

* * *

After half an hour of work on "My Love is a Stapler", the whole atmosphere in the music room was different. There was a new energy all around. Between Tsumugi's tea and Mio's songs, the light music club was reborn.

The band members took a break to adjust their instruments. Azusa looked around and saw big smiles on everyone's faces as they worked. She couldn't help smiling too. This was –

Wait. Not quite everyone. Why did Yui look down in the dumps?

"Are you okay, senior?" she asked, hoping this wouldn't be one of those problems she had to wear cat ears to fix.

Yui sniffed. "I'm fine. It's just... this song..."

"What about it?"

The guitarist had a far-off look. "You'll understand one day, little Azu-nyan. Sometimes... the sheets of love are too thick to staple through."

Ritsu rolled her eyes so hard the girls could hear it. "Yui, are you _still_ on about that dude from the record store?"

She wiped away a single tear. "Even the red string of fate could not keep us together..."

Mio muttered to Tsumugi, "Not when it was cut by the blue scissors of he-already-had-a-girlfriend."

"Now all I can do is pine away for him. Pine away..."

Azusa said, "Uh, Senior..."

"Shh. I'm pining."

"Hokay, that tears it." Ritsu cracked her knuckles and rolled over to the guitarist. "Yui, listen up. I'm gonna teach you Ritsu's Facts of Love."

"You know about love, Ricchan? I've never seen you with a –"

"Shut up until you can't shut up any shutter. Now pay attention. Fact number one: love sucks."

Yui rummaged in her pockets. "Should I be writing this down?"

Azusa whispered, "Blmmnd."

"Oh! Right. I keep forge–"

"That's not as shut as you can shut up!" interrupted Ritsu. "Shut shutter!"

Pen in hand, Ui added, "Don't worry, Big Sister. I'm keeping track."

"Fact two," said Ritsu, holding up her drumsticks in a V. "Love costs money. Even if the guy's the chivalrous type — y'know, a sucker — you still spend money prettying yourself up and all that. Money that _could_ be going toward a new hi-hat for a percussionist friend."

"I'm okay for money," said Yui. "I think I have five bucks. Let me check."

"Shutter! Rule three –"

"I thought they were facts."

"_Fact_ three: love takes time. You need all your time for studying. If you want a boyfriend, get super-smart first. Besides, time is _money_, so see above."

Yui looked at the ceiling.

"Fact five –"

"What happened to fact four?" asked Ui.

"Fact four is love sucks. Fact five: seriously, love _sucks_. It eats your life. You stop caring about anything but some bozo. And then he rejects you, which leads me to fact six: PAIN."

"He wouldn't reject me!" Yui protested. "We're destined for each other!"

Ritsu cocked her head at Mio. "That's what _she_ said about the guy she wanted in junior high. Know what happened after that?"

"No, she doesn't," said the bassist, suddenly standing right behind Ritsu. "And she's not _going_ to."

"Threaten all ya want. Nothing you could do would be worse than the weeks you spent cryin' at me about him. I still hear it in my nightmares. 'Ritsuuuu! It hurts so much! Men are ani–'"

There was a moment of violence like none the music room had ever seen before.

"EeeeOWW," groaned Ritsu as Mio stormed back to her bass. "I have got to learn when to quit."

"Don't quit yet!" said Yui. "You're not done telling me the facts!"

"Right. Well, you just saw a practical demonstration of fact seven: love hurts. Sometimes it hurts everyone within a certain radius."

Jun raised a hand. "Will there be a fact about dirty stuff?"

The drummer gave her a dismissive glance. "You juniors shouldn't even be listening. This is grownup business. Come back when you're ready. We'll know by the gazongas."

The new member glared. Azusa tried to pretend she hadn't heard. Ui showed just a hint of a smile.

"And finally, fact ten –"

"You skipped eight and nine!" Yui complained.

"Fact eight is love sucks. Fact nine is a granola bar in case we get hungry later. Fact ten is you're still not shutting up enough! Shut!"

"Sorry."

"Anyway, fact ten — no, wait. You made me use that one. Well, ten was gonna be the conclusion: love _sucks_. It's not worth the hassle. The only person here who could get it and keep it and _afford_ it is Mugi. Let's all leave love to her and count our blessings."

As Tsumugi blushed, Yui sorted through all the new information in her head. "So you're saying... I should forget about him and move on?"

"Ideally. We'll settle for just not buggin' us about it anymore, though."

"I don't know. That doesn't sound like what Juliet would do."

Ritsu threw up her hands. "Okay, now I know when to quit. Anyone else care to try?"

Ui came over to handle her sister. Ritsu rolled back to the drum set, where Mio was waiting for her... and smirking. "You better not be plannin' to hit me again."

"No no. I was just thinking."

"About?"

"How fast your 'facts of love' would fly right out the window if a boy ever confessed to _you_."

"Hey!"

"Remember that time at the karaoke bar when you thought a guy was checking you out, and it turned out to be me he was after?"

"_Remember?_ I swore revenge upon your house to the thousandth gene– I mean, pssh. No skin off my nose."

As the debate continued, Jun sidled up to Azusa. "About what Ritsu was saying... does Tsumugi actually have a boyfriend?"

"None that I've ever seen," said the guitarist.

Jun looked across the room at the rich girl, particularly her midsection.

"Is that..." Jun paused, looking very awkward. "Is that because she ate him?"

* * *

Sawako was an absolute wreck, and her colleagues didn't blame her a bit. She'd managed, through her rage and despair, to tell them the whole story — from Tetsuo's lies to his brutal assessment of her prospects. Both teachers felt overwhelming sympathy for her. It was a strange, unfamiliar feeling.

Kawasumi put a hand on Sawako's shoulder. "Don't let this beat you. He's a bastard. You're better off without him."

Yamasu did the only thing that came naturally to her when she wanted to make a nice gesture. "Have a drink," she said, passing the pitcher.

"I don't know if –"

"Tonight your drinks are on me. You need this."

Sawako gratefully poured herself a glass. "I guess life had one more surprise for me tonight. I never thought I would be getting consolation from you..."

Yamasu finished chugging her current drink and wiped her mouth. "Whattaya mean by that?"

"Well, it's just... you're not someone I would expect it from."

"Is this about our clubs supposedly being rivals? Because I've never –"

Sawako waved a hand dismissively. "Not the clubs. Not as far as I know, anyway."

"Then what?"

"Well, I... I've always considered you _my_ rival. I thought you did too."

Yamasu looked genuinely shocked. "Really? Why?"

"You don't feel like we're competing at all?" asked Sawako, equally surprised.

"Competing for _what_?"

"The students! You and I are the young, beautiful music teachers that all the girls admire! We're their idols!"

There was a pause, during which Kawasumi silently congratulated herself for guessing this one weeks ago. Then Yamasu exploded with laughter.

Sawako frowned. "What's so funny?"

"The — the _students_? You want the students? And you thought _I_ did too? Ah ha ha ha!"

"You mean you don't –"

"TAKE them! Please take them! I'm not doing this on purpose! I can't stand the little pinheads!"

Once her laughter subsided, Yamasu was surprised to see Sawako looking even more sulky. "What's wrong?"

"So you're not even trying. That's nice, Megumi. You know, I put hard work into my image."

_Oops._ Yamasu realized too late the faux pas she'd committed.

"I wish I had so much love I could just throw it away," Sawako continued. "So much... love..."

Kawasumi thought fast. They had to switch gears back to commiseration before Sawako got even worse. She raised her ginger ale and announced, "A toast! To men — may they all burn in hell!"

Sawako snapped back up and clinked her glass with Kawasumi's. "I'll drink to _that_!"

Yamasu joined in. Soon all three teachers were bashing Tetsuo with abandon. Sawako began to look just a bit better — still devastated, to be sure, but not in the same dangerous, brink-of-murder/suicide way as when she'd first come in. As the night wore on, she even began to look a bit blurry.

Wait. Everything looked a bit blurry. Why did everything –

"Megumi," said Kawasumi, "this isn't just ginger ale anymore, is it?"

"I have no regrets. You were being the lamest drinking buddy _ever_."

* * *

By seven o'clock, the girls were getting close to the limit of their endurance. They'd never held such a long practice session, even before school concerts. With "Stapler" now sounding pretty good, the decision was wordlessly made to take a break before choosing which piece to work on next.

"Hey senior!" said Jun to Mio. "I really like that stapler song. Can I do a solo on it?"

Ritsu somehow managed to look down at Jun despite coming up to roughly her hip level. "You? The newbie? You're a hundred years too _annoying_ to get a –"

"Stop that!" said Mio. She gave her friend a look that said _She's enthusiastic! Don't spoil it!_ "What did you have in mind, Jun?"

"This!" The younger bassist started noodling around the basic melody of the song. As she played, eyebrows began to raise all over the room.

"That was... impressive," said Azusa when the solo was done.

"Wonderful!" Tsumugi agreed.

Jun made an overdramatic bow. "Ms. Yamasu makes us do solos sometimes in the jazz band! That's how I learned!"

"But that was a rock solo, not jazz," said Azusa.

"Yeah. She says I need work."

Mio did a little math in her head. _Eight minutes on stage per band... "My Love is a Stapler" usually takes four... a solo might be another minute... which leaves... leaves... a train leaves Point A travelling at –_ "ARRGH!"

Ritsu asked, "You okay? Is it another rage blackout?" (Jun glared at her.)

"Sorry. I'm fine. Jun, let me think about the solo, okay? It'll depend on which second song we pick."

"No problem! It's an honour just to be nominated!" She bowed again.

Ritsu caught Tsumugi's eye and made a series of quick gestures: first holding two fingers close together, then miming a straw at her mouth, and finally pointing at the ceiling. Both girls giggled quietly at the private jo–

"Ha ha!" said Yui. "I get it!"

The drummer grabbed her by the sleeve and hissed, "I was _trying_ to be _subtle_, and for the last dagfraggin' time, _you can't see_!"

"It's okay. Ui's here."

"She still has to _tell_ you!"

Mio frowned parentally at everyone involved. "Can we please focus? We need to choose our second number so I can decide about this solo."

"Hey, speaking of solos," said Jun, "how did everybody else's public performances go? I heard about Tsumugi's and Ritsu's..."

Yui sniffed. "Mine led only to heartbreak and brokenheartedness." Ui put an arm around her.

"How 'bout you, Azusa?"

Her classmate bristled. "Fine. It was fine."

"Whatdja sing? Where was it? How many –"

"Hey, back off!"

Jun was right up in Azusa's face. "Back off you say? Those sound like the words of someone who didn't really –"

"What about YOU?" Azusa fired back, making her own personal-space intrusion. "I haven't seen you breaking into song in class!"

Jun grinned proudly. "_That_ is because I did mine yesterday when you were away! I sang the whole _Les Miserables_ score! You should've seen Mr. Kanashimi's face!"

"Oh, how _convenient_! The one day I was gone! Well, guess what? I did _mine_ that day too! Prove me wrong!"

"So what song was it? Hmmmm?"

Azusa blushed. "Um, 'Mister Golden Sun'."

"Ha! Never heard of it!"

"Oh, _please_! Everybody sings that as a kid! And I'm _so_ sure you know the whole score of _Les Miserables_!"

Tsumugi whispered to Ritsu, "Should we do something about this?"

"Nah, let 'em fight it out. This isn't like the thing before. It's just healthy bickering."

"Friends are supposed to fight?"

"Sure. It's harmless."

Tsumugi thought deeply for a moment, then turned to Yui and said, "Your hair clips look silly!" She didn't hear. The blonde slumped in disappointment.

As Azusa and Jun raged on, Mio found a chair. This fight was unproductive, but it would at least give her a minute to think. And anyway, the timing was good. Jun was now distracted enough that she would probably forget to ask what Mio had done for her "solo." Not that she would have lied, but this saved her the trouble of defending herself.

_Singing in public,_ thought Mio with a shudder. _Typical Sawa-chan. She loves to embarrass and humiliate US, but never herself. I'll do my solo when she does HERS._

* * *

"Only a go-go girl in love with someone who didn't caaaaare! Only twenty-one, she was a young girl just in from somewhere!..."

As Sawako weepily sang into the karaoke mic, her two colleagues watched with blank expressions.

"Why is she singing Canadian folk music?" asked Yamasu.

"I'm surprised they even had it," said Kawasumi.

Both teachers took a drink.

"What's a go-go girl?" asked Yamasu.

"Some kind of dancer, I think," said Kawasumi.

They took another swig.

"Is Sawako really 21?"

"It's entirely possible that she thinks so right now."

They drank again.

Yamasu stared at her glass. "I'm empty. I think I'll try that purple stuff next."

"You mean the drink that American girl was passing around earlier? I don't think she was really a waitress."

"Well, where is she now?"

"In the corner. Passed out."

"Sounds like my kinda booze!" Yamasu hopped to her feet, took two steps toward where the girl had fallen, and then lost her balance and hit the floor.

As Kawasumi helped her up, Sawako finished singing. "Thank you, thank you," she said to the cheering audience that existed only in her mind. "And NOW... time we get a little serious. A little _angry_. A little METAL! Jukebox, gimme some Slayer!"

Kawasumi stared in disbelief as Sawako mussed up her hair, whipped out an air guitar, and began screaming out lyrics in a voice only slightly more coherent than a real metal singer's.

"RAINING BLOOOOODDDDD! FROM A LACERATED SKY!"

Kawasumi looked at the semiconscious Yamasu and said, "Just to give you fair warning, if anyone asks, I'm denying I know either of you."

* * *

Mio had set an upper limit of eight o'clock for this practice. It was nine now. As reluctant as she was to call a halt with so much more room for improvement, there was really no choice anymore. The band needed a good night's sleep if they wanted to stand a chance tomorrow.

She turned to Ritsu. The drummer knew what she was thinking and answered with her eyes: _I'll go till you say stop, but now's probably good._ That was all the confirmation Mio needed. She raised a hand to get the others' attention and said, "We're going to have to stop here."

"Not yet!" said Jun. "We're not ready! We've gotta keep going! All through the ni– nah, just kidding. I can barely hold my bass up." Everyone smiled.

"Mio, does this mean you've decided on our second song?" Tsumugi asked.

She sighed; that problem was still unsolved, even after two hours spent running through the band's whole repertoire. Mio felt like she had a point to make, and none of her current songs made it. If only she'd found the inspiration for a new one!

But that couldn't be helped now. It was time to choose. "Let's go with 'Fluffy Fluffy Time'," she said. "We've been playing it the longest."

Ritsu nodded. "We should open with that one, then. Bounciness before balladry." There was general agreement.

"And my solo?" asked Jun, looking like a jack-in-the-box about to pop.

"Well... okay, I guess we can fit it in. Assuming we –"

Jun popped. "YES! Thank you, Senior! Thankyouthankyou_thankyou_!" She clamped onto Mio and squeezed her like she was trying to get the last bit of toothpaste out.

"Don't... mention..."

"This is so awesome! I've never gotten to do a live solo before! Now I get to do one in front of hundreds of people!"

Mio went pale. "H-hundreds..."

"Hundreds and _hundreds_ and _hundreds_!" Jun shook Mio on the beats. "Hey, maybe even a thou–"

A loud noise cut her off. "Oops," said Ritsu. "Dropped my drumsticks. Can you come over and get 'em for me, squirt?"

"But Tsumugi and Yui are closer," said the confused bassist.

"Yeah, but _you_ are a junior. Do stuff I say."

Rather miffed, Jun let go and went to fetch the drumsticks. Mio took a moment to calm down. As she did, she noticed Ritsu giving her a wink.

_So I wasn't seeing things,_ Mio thought. _Ritsu didn't drop those sticks, she threw them. She could tell right away how uncomfortable Jun was making me._

Maybe she was still stuck in high-emotion mode, but Mio suddenly felt overcome with gratitude. It wasn't just this latest incident — Ritsu was always there for her. She might be subtle about it, disguising her support with a layer of pranks and smartass remarks... a _lot_ of them... but she was still the best friend Mio could ask for. She was like a drumbeat — loud, sometimes annoying, but steady and grounding.

And what had Mio done for her lately? In this whole awful month, had she once taken her mind off herself and done something nice for Ritsu?

She took a quick look around. The band hadn't put their instruments away yet. She braced herself and said, "Play it."

"Huh?"

"You know. The... dinosaur thing. Play it."

Everyone stood blinking for a moment.

"Is this a trap?" Ritsu asked.

"No. I want to hear it. Really."

Yui whispered to the others, "That's what she would say if it were a trap!"

"It's NOT!" said Mio, stamping her foot. "I actually want to hear the stupid song! Just play it already!"

Still dazed, the girls got back in position. This was a fairly baffling reversal. But a smile was starting to spread across Ritsu's face. "Last chance to change your mind," she told Mio.

The bassist shook her head. This was the least she could do.

"You asked for it." The drummer raised her sticks. "One, two, three, four!"

The band started playing, with Ritsu on vocals. It would have been easy for any observer to tell that this was a song they just did for fun. The mood was totally different from anything else they'd played today. Azusa didn't have her usual face of intense concentration; the normally flawless Tsumugi dropped a note here and there. Everyone but Ritsu snickered at least once at the lyrics.

And through it all, Mio watched, looking more and more thoughtful.

"You'll never get away from the Mecha-Brontosaurus! STOMP STOMP!" Ritsu finally cracked up at her own last-minute addition to the outro, and the whole band joined her in laughter. They turned to Mio to see whether the song had amused or annoyed her.

The bassist didn't look up. She was deep in thought, one hand on her chin.

"Play it again," she said.

* * *

In her high school days, Ms. Kawasumi had never had to help a friend stagger out of a bar. Not that she wouldn't have done it. She just had more refined friends.

"Don' wanna go yet!" mumbled Yamasu.

Scowling, Kawasumi wrapped the jazz teacher's arm around her shoulder. "We're _going_. You brought me so I could carry you out the door, remember? One more drink and I might as well carry you all the way to the hospital. Or the police station. Or the _coroner_."

"No! I wanna stay t'll closin'! Sawa-chan, help me fight 'er off!"

"You got it, Yama-chan!" said Sawako, swinging a limp arm at Kawasumi. "Let my best buddy go!"

Kawasumi rolled her eyes. The two of them had been best friends for the last two hours or so, with a brief period of being worst enemies in the middle. It had been pretty embarrassing to watch. Not quite as embarrassing as their duet on "Nothing Else Matters", but close. Gooey friendship could be as annoying as bitter feuding.

But then again... perhaps there was a lesson in this. If Yamasu and Sawako could make peace this fast, perhaps there was hope for solving bigger conflicts. Perhaps the world could stand to get itself drunk once in a –

She shook her head vigorously. Apparently she was a philosophical drunk. _Dammit_, Yamasu!

"Which wayz yer car?" asked the load on her shoulder.

"It's around back."

"But wur goin' out the front."

"Yes. We're taking a cab."

Yamasu looked skeptically at her. "W't kinda designationed driver are ya?"

"The over-the-legal-limit kind," Kawasumi growled. "Thank you SO much for that. I'll have to come pick the car up tomorrow. Tonight we let someone sober drive."

"Pick me!" said Sawako, about to walk into the door frame. Kawasumi pulled her out of the way.

There were a few cabs waiting outside. Kawasumi picked one at random and loaded Yamasu into it, where she lolled around half-asleep, ignoring the noise of her cell phone. "Okay," said Kawasumi to Sawako. "You next."

"I'm gonna walk home," the music teacher said. "I live pretty close."

Kawasumi frowned. "I don't think that's a good plan, Sawako. You should come with us."

"S'a free country. I want some fresh air. Anyway, I can hold my liquour better than roly-poly over there." She pointed to Yamasu, who was slowly drifting around on her axis.

_No one in the world could hold THAT much liquour_, thought Kawasumi. She tried a different tack. "It's ten o'clock at night. Even if you were sober, it wouldn't be safe to –"

"I live right there!" Sawako pointed at an apartment building about two blocks away.

Kawasumi sighed. She couldn't force Sawako, and it _was_ a pretty short walk... "All right. Just be careful. If you need anything, be sure to... uh..."

"Yes?"

"...Call someone." Kawasumi couldn't bring herself to finish making the offer. It was too much what a friend would say. She felt bad for Sawako, but these people weren't Kawasumi's friends, they were her coworkers. One night of forced drinking didn't change that.

Sawako surely had friends of her own to call. Kawasumi hoped she would do so. But it wasn't her business.

"Goodnight, Sawako. See you tomorrow." She got in the car next to Yamasu, who was now mumbling something about a text message, and gave the cab driver directions to her house. She would have to try and squeeze Yamasu's address out of her on the way.

Sawako, alone on the curb, watched the cab drive off. She waited until it was out of sight, and then a minute longer, just to be sure.

She felt a bit bad about lying. Those two had interrupted their evening just to comfort her. They didn't even know her all that well, but they had shown her compassion in her moment of weakness. Spending time with them had honestly made Sawako feel a little better.

She didn't want to feel better.

With a final look at the random apartment building she had pointed to, Sawako turned around and went back into the bar.

* * *

_PRIORITY TRANSMISSION - TOP SECRET_

_Reporting: Service Lieutenant-Colonel-in-Chief Jun Sakurada, O.B.E. (pending)_

_What follows is my final report._

_The target group ships out tomorrow. I have successfully manipulated acting commander Target M into making an abrupt change in strategy. Instead of proven material, the group will be playing her amateur compositions. I have also sown discord over various issues and taken personal responsibility for some of tomorrow's stage time, in order to maximize the damage done by my desertion._

_By this time tomorrow, the mission will be complete. Its success will leave no room for doubt as to my intentions or my dedication to the cause. The string of events leading to this point was not random. I have been in control at every step._

_I'm not a failure. I'm not a little kid. I'm not shallow or easily-distracted or fangirly. I'm not just out to have fun. I'm not..._

"Hey Jun, we need to go. What's that you're typing?"

"Nothing! Be right there!"

_I'm not those things. I'm NOT._

_You'll see._

* * *

In the end, they had played through "Beware the Mecha-Brontosaurus" five times, start to finish. Ritsu, not Mio, had been the one to call a halt. The drummer's arms were falling off and, truth be told, she found her lyrics more embarrassing each time she had to sing them.

Mio had been very focused the whole time. She hadn't told them why she wanted to keep hearing the song. Ritsu decided to hope for the best (a sudden interest in dinosaurs) but prepare for the worst (a very, very thorough mocking session next time she got on Mio's nerves).

But hey, the important thing was how well this practice had gone. She could hardly believe it had only been last night that Sawako had abandoned them. For a while there, things had looked completely hopeless. But now Regionals was in their grasp! The old saying was right — it was always darkest just before the dawn.

"Whew!" said Yui, dropping to the floor. She went from standing to lying flat in less than a second. Somehow Giita made it through this without the slightest bump. (Yui herself would feel a bruise or two later.)

"Everybody get lots of sleep tonight," said Mio. "I'm sorry I pushed the practice so late. We need to be well-rested tomorrow, so go to bed as soon as you get home."

"Somehow I don't think that'll be a problem," said Ritsu, pointing at Yui. The guitarist was out like a light.

"YUI! Stop that! Go sleep at home! And _you_ stop helping!" The last part was to Ui, who had found a blanket somewhere and was spreading it over her sister.

Azusa frowned at the darkness out the window. "We'd better not walk home, at least not alone. I think I'll call my dad and see if he can pick me up."

"I should probably do that too," said Mio, locking her bass in its case. (Yui whispered to her sister, "Why would Mio call Azu-nyan's dad?")

"Heck with that," said Ritsu. "Hey Mugi! Howboutcha call up a limo or a jet plane for... for..." She looked around the room. After a moment, so did the others.

Tsumugi was gone.

In Ritsu's head, the first domino began to wobble. "Mio..."

Her friend came closer. "I know, Ritsu," she said under her breath.

"We've been trying so hard not to think about whatever weirdness she's up to. But it's the last night. If she's plannin' something crazy, now's the time."

"I know."

"Sawa-chan wouldn't tell us what her gimmick is. Mugi never did either."

"She hasn't just gained weight," said Mio. "She's gained a _lot_... and all in her stomach. Her face doesn't show it at all."

"Yeah."

Both girls were very quiet. They didn't know for sure what was going on with Tsumugi, but they could no longer pretend it was anything good. And there was no time left to do anything about it.

It was always darkest just before the dawn, thought Ritsu.

She hoped it wasn't always brightest just before the lights went out.

* * *

"Last call," the bartender announced. Sawako looked into the bottom of her glass and wondered whether to get one more refill. She decided not to. What would be the point?

Alcohol had utterly failed her, and it wasn't for lack of trying. Sawako had spent the last several hours getting as drunk as her salary allowed. Her table was littered with bottles, piled up faster than the waitresses could take them away. She'd done her level best to drown her misery.

And _physically_, she'd succeeded. Sawako was swimming in outer space. She had only vague memories of what it had been like to see straight. Her thoughts were a jumbled mess.

But every one of them was about Tetsuo.

"Okay, that's all. Closing time," said the bartender. The sound was distant and fragile. _Better head for home,_ thought Sawako. _My big, full, welcoming home. Go to sleep for a day or two and burn through this. Because THAT was the plan for tonight._

Sawako got to her feet. For about five seconds, she stayed on them. Then she fell right back into her chair, overcome with nausea and vertigo.

She'd drunk too much. Way, _way_ too much. In her misery, she'd forgotten to get up and move around once in a while, so she hadn't felt the full effect until now... and it was beyond description.

Sawako couldn't move. She could do nothing but hurt. The agony was like a tar pit, fixing her absolutely in place. She would have screamed if her mouth had been working.

The bartender's voice came back, louder this time... no, closer. He must have come to her table. "Hey, we're closing. You've gotta go, lady."

She couldn't answer. It was all she could do to breathe.

"Hey! Can you hear... oh, hell, not again." One of the bottles on the table vanished from the teacher's sight. "Damn purple stuff! When I find out who keeps sneaking this in..."

Purple? Hmm. Sawako vaguely remembered drinking something purple. It had tasted like ten thousand years of being buried alive.

"Can you get up? If you need me to call an ambulance, blink twice. You can do that, right?"

Before she could find out, Sawako felt a hand on her shoulder. A new voice came from behind her. "It's all right. I have been looking for her. I will take her home."

The bartender grunted to the person who had spoken. "You her daughter?"

There was a laugh — a light, fluttery laugh that bounced around in Sawako's ears. "No, but we are very close."

"Look, she's in bad condition. I can't let you take her without proof that she knows you."

"Of course she does. Right, Sawa-chan?"

The newcomer laid her head on the table next to Sawako's. Her vision was almost gone, but she could just barely tell who it was. She forced the name through her throat. "Ts...Tsumugi?"

"That's right," she said, smiling. And that was it — Sawako couldn't keep her eyes open any longer. Her hearing, too, began to fade; a few more things were said between Tsumugi and the bartender, but she could make nothing out. Only her nausea was keeping her conscious.

Something changed. Sawako had a vague sense of being higher off the ground; she felt something bearing her up on each side. A new male voice joined Tsumugi's, though she still couldn't tell what they were saying. She briefly felt fresh air on her face, and then she was sitting again, feeling the low vibration of an engine around her.

A car. That must have been Tsumugi's driver helping her, then. But how had her student even known where she was? She tried to figure it out, but it just made her head hurt more.

There was a thump next to Sawako. She felt something being pushed gently into her mouth. Unable to protest, she could only swallow it. Some kind of pill? Good Lord, had she just been slipped a mickey? No, that was crazy, but what was it then? The car started moving, distracting her.

For the next half hour, Sawako sat still as they drove along, letting the motion of the car soothe her like an infant. Tsumugi leaned against her side the whole way home, whispering things she couldn't hear.

* * *

Somehow, by the time they reached Sawako's house, she had some of her senses back. The overpowering torpor she'd drunk herself into was retreating; her vision and hearing were still fuzzy, but no longer useless. She still felt sicker than a whole dog pound, but not too sick to move. With Tsumugi's help, she got through her door and onto the bed.

"Thank you," she said. Her throat, too, seemed to be working again.

Tsumugi smiled, the same refreshing smile as ever. "Think nothing of it."

"Did... did you give me some kind of pill back there?"

She nodded. "It is a special medicine that helps to alleviate drunkenness. I have something else to help with your hangover tomorrow."

Sawako hadn't even thought of that yet. She'd had hangovers before, but with the amount of drinking she'd done tonight, tomorrow morning would be pure hell. But then... why not? It would just mean her physical state would match her emotional one.

With the alcohol no longer overwhelming her, Sawako's _real_ pain was returning. She suddenly wished she hadn't taken Tsumugi's pill. Any distraction, even the worst drinking binge of her life, was better than this.

"You were right," she said quietly.

"Oh?"

"Tetsuo... he wasn't telling the truth. About _anything_. He... he..." Sawako could no longer hold back the tears that had been waiting all night to burst forth. She broke down.

Tsumugi sat on the bed next to Sawako and wrapped her arms around her. "I'm sorry."

"I was a fool!" the teacher sobbed. "I was _so stupid!_"

"Now, now." The rich girl stroked her hair gently, trying to calm her down.

Sawako cried for a long, long time, until her tears gave way to dry, wracking sobs. She felt like her whole world had ended. She'd put everything she had on the line, and now it was all gone. Crying was all she had left to do.

After what felt like hours, Sawako finally fell silent. Tsumugi hadn't let go the whole time.

"Thank you," the teacher said again. "For everything. I don't deserve it. I'm so sorry you had to see me like this..."

"There will never be a time I regret seeing you," said Tsumugi.

"I don't know what I'm going to do..."

"It's all right. _Everything_ will be all right from now on."

Something started to poke under Sawako's mental veil of heartbreak. Something about how Tsumugi was talking... and something she could feel against her stomach. "Tsumugi, why are you still wearing –"

"Shh. It will all be better now. I know it hurts, but you'll be happier without him in your life. He was only a distraction from what really matters."

"You... you can let go of me, you know..."

"I will never let go of you," said the blonde, pulling back and taking Sawako's face in her hands. "_Never_. You are my Sawa-chan. No one else will ever hurt you again."

In every life, there are key points of decision.

"We will always be together. _Always_."

Sawako had chosen not to look a gift horse in the mouth, and oh, how she was regretting it.

"After all..." said Tsumugi, pressing Sawako's hand to her chest padding, "I _am_ carrying your baby."

* * *

**Next: REGIONALS**

[A/N: I started this story when a certain show had just begun its second season, and now it's just begun its _third_... ah well. The American girl is a cameo who wandered in from my _Ai Yori Aoshi_ fic, "The Red String Blues." Don't drink anything she gives you. Next chapter is the long-awaited main event, so be here!] 


	8. She's Not There

Twenty-five seconds ago, Sawako had been drunk. Deeply, impenetrably drunk. The pill she'd taken for it had only been able to do so much. Her thoughts had been murky and confused, her senses even more so.

Sawako was dead sober now.

She looked at Tsumugi's face and saw her mistakes. Things she had missed over the past month were suddenly all too obvious. She could remember with painful clarity every warning sign she'd ignored, every clue she hadn't picked up on. What she had done and what she had failed to do.

It was all reflected in Tsumugi's lovestruck expression... in her bright, shining eyes.

"Mugi..." she began, desperately trying to think of what to say. "I'm... I'm sorry, but..."

"You don't have to apologize, Sawa-chan. I understand about you and Tetsuo. Part of you just wanted a traditional relationship, and he was very tempting. But I wasn't worried. Oh, I was a little jealous at first, but after _this_" - she patted her stomach - "I knew you would always come back to me."

Sawako shuddered. What had she _done_ to this poor girl?

"Now please come closer. Please... I want to finally be with you..."

No more time for indecision. Sawako pushed Tsumugi back with both hands, counting on the element of surprise to break the girl's frighteningly strong grip. It worked: she got free, falling backward and nearly banging her head on the wall.

Tsumugi looked at her in confusion. "Sawa-chan? What's wrong?"

"_This!_ This is wrong! You have the wrong idea!"

"Is it too soon? I'm sorry! I thought now was when you would need comfort the most!" She got up hastily. "I will give you time to -"

"No! Sit down and listen." Sawako wasn't looking forward to this, but now that she was aware of the problem, she couldn't let it continue.

The rich girl obeyed. "Please tell me what you want from me, Sawa-chan. I will do it without hesitation."

The teacher cringed, hating herself for letting it get this bad. She should have seen it coming - the way her students admired her, sooner or later one was bound to take it too far. And Tsumugi had always admired her more than anyone else. Between that and her peculiar perspective on the world, the poor kid had been a stalker waiting to happen.

And Sawako had never dealt with it, had even carelessly encouraged her... all because she liked being worshipped.

"Tsumugi... let me explain something to you. Sometimes a young girl like yourself gets very impressed with a mature woman she knows. It's like being a fan of a movie star or idol singer, but more personal. A lot of girls experience it. Boys too, but usually before puberty, when it's less... confusing."

Tsumugi nodded, apparently with her so far.

"Well, when this kind of admiration is especially strong, it can feel like attraction... even love. It's what they call a girl-crush."

"You mean like Azusa has on Mio?"

"No." (Well, actually, now that she mentioned it...) "I don't mean them, Tsumugi. I mean _you_. You and me."

Tsumugi finally got the point, and her pain was so obvious that Sawako felt worse than ever. "You... you think what we have isn't real?"

"There _is_ no 'what we have', Tsumugi. You misunderstood your gimmick. The 'baby' was just my idea, it wasn't _mine_. That's impossible."

"Everything is possible for two people in love!"

"Um... I think your parents may need to have a talk with you about that."

Tsumugi's tears were flowing freely now. "Then what was it all for? What was the point?"

"Well, sympathy points, like the other gimmicks. You're supposed to be persevering bravely despite -"

"Not that!" For the first time ever, Sawako saw anger in her student's face. "I believed all this time that my 'pregnancy' had special meaning for the two of us! It made me feel so close to you! I... _I thought we loved each other!_"

The words hit Sawako like a knife to the heart. She had said them herself that very night. Suddenly, Tsumugi's pain was no longer something external she was dealing with. It was her own, and the knowledge that she'd inflicted it on someone else made her hate herself more than ever.

Without a word, she sat back down on the bed and wrapped her arms around Tsumugi. Her student began sobbing, just as Sawako herself had before. She held her close and stroked her back, determined to do all she could to ease the pain.

She wasn't Tetsuo. This was her mistake, and she would _not_ let it destroy someone she cared about.

Before long, Tsumugi's tears began to subside. "I... I thought..."

"I _do_ love you," said Sawako. "I love you very much. But it's the love of a teacher for her student. I'm so sorry I made you think it was more than that."

The blonde drew back, still sniffling. "Why can't it be more?"

"It _isn't_, Tsumugi."

"But I want it to be! I want it so badly!"

The girl's pleading was so pitiable that Sawako couldn't look directly at her. She decided to try letting Tsumugi down easy; instead of flat rejection, she would give some practical reasons. "First of all, I'm your teacher. It's a very serious breach of ethics for a teacher to get romantically involved with a student."

"But it happens all the time!"

"And teachers get _fired_ for it all the time."

"That doesn't matter! You've already quit!"

Had she? So much had happened in the last 24 hours that Sawako was losing track. "One way or another, we _met_ when I was your teacher. That's not a good way to start a relationship. People would talk -"

"I can take it!" Tsumugi raised her fist.

"- and they'd be _right_ to talk. Love is supposed to be between equals. That's something we'll never be. You're only half my age!"

The blonde's eyes went wide. "You're 32, Sawa-chan?"

"_Roughly_ half," Sawako amended. She satisfied her urge to whack Tsumugi by picturing herself whacking Ritsu. "And that's not the only thing people would talk about."

"What else is there?"

Sawako looked closely at her. "Tsumugi, it has occurred to you that we're both women, right?"

"What? Oh. Yes, of course. What about it?" The teacher sighed. She didn't know whether to envy or pity Tsumugi's sheer cluelessness.

"Relationships like that are... different. A lot of people don't approve of them." Honestly, Sawako had no idea whether she _herself_ approved of them. She'd never put much thought into it.

"I told you! I don't care what people think!"

"Oh no? Not even your parents? Your friends?"

Tsumugi didn't falter. "I will understand if they cannot accept me. This is more important."

_You say that now,_ thought Sawako with a sigh. She knew that feeling - wanting something badly enough to defy the world. Tsumugi believed with all the strength of her teenage heart that she _had_ to have this, that she would die without it, that love was all she needed.

Yes, she understood Tsumugi... but how could she possibly make Tsumugi understand her? How could a besotted high school girl, fearless of all consequences, imagine a time when she would actually care about them? Sawako had spent two years in an over-the-top metal band - and she would spend the rest of her _life_ hiding the evidence. The real world could only be ignored for a while. Sooner or later, even the most powerful high wore off... and reality would still be there, waiting patiently.

But she couldn't make Tsumugi believe that. Some things could only be understood when it was too late.

Sawako put her hands on her student's shoulders. There was only one way to end this, and it was going to hurt.

"Listen to me," she said. "You're right, those other things don't matter. The reason we can't be together is that _I don't have feelings for you_."

Tears came to Tsumugi's eyes again. "W-well... maybe when I'm older...?"

"No. We'll never be a couple, Tsumugi. I don't see you that way."

"But could you _try_?"

"No! Look, you're still young and confused about your feelings. I'm not. I know what I want. I'm attracted to _men_, and that won't change."

To Sawako's surprise, Tsumugi glared at her. "You don't have to lie."

"What? I'm not -"

"Yes you are!"

Sawako narrowed her eyes. "I know what I like, Tsumugi. Believe me, I _like_ men." _Maybe more than is good for -_

"Come ON! We're all girls in the light music club, and you _molest_ us!"

Oh. That.

"You dress us up in costumes! Sexy costumes! _Fetish_ costumes!"

"Uh, there's a perfectly good explanation..."

"Let's hear it!"

Sawako blushed. "Well... didn't you have a dollhouse when you were younger? Wasn't it fun to dress up your dolls?"

"Yes," said Tsumugi, frowning. "But my dolls didn't feel like they were ruined for marriage afterwards."

"You feel -"

"Not _me_," she quickly clarified. "You don't have to _force_ me. It's Mio who really gets upset, and you pick on her the most."

"Well, of course I do! It's what girls like that are _for_! She's like a big squishy marshmallow! Her reactions are just so..." Sawako suddenly went quiet. "Oh. I see."

Tsumugi just stared accusingly.

"All right, point taken. I do have... habits. But that's all they are. I don't feel anything romantic for other women. And don't be so sure _you_ do either."

"I love you!"

"But you're still so young, Tsumugi. Your heart is still forming. You won't really understand yourself until you're older... that's when you'll know for sure what you want most. But if you've already given up everything for what you wanted _now_, what will you do then?" She squeezed Tsumugi's shoulders. "I'm sorry... but even if I _were_ in love with you, I couldn't let you take that chance."

The student's eyes became misty again. "I... I love you..."

Sawako reached behind her student and carefully unlatched the belly pouch she was wearing. "I'm sorry."

"I love you... _I love you_... why... why isn't that enough?"

Faces came to mind before she could stop them. The high school crush she'd tried to impress with music, the perfect college senior who had married her roommate... the suave "millionaire" she'd proposed to. "Sometimes no amount of love is enough."

"What do I do now? Where do I go?"

"You get some sleep," said Sawako as maternally as she could. "I'll do the same. We're both up much too late. Your driver is still outside, right?"

Tsumugi nodded silently.

"Then it's time to go home to your own bed. Let it all... float away." She finished removing Tsumugi's pouch. "We'll both feel better in the morning."

Tsumugi's head sank low. "Sawa-chan..."

She smoothed her student's hair. "I think it's time you stopped calling me that, Tsumugi."

The girl looked up and smiled - a smile so thin and empty it nearly broke Sawako's heart. "As you wish," she said.

She leaned in, kissed Sawako on the cheek, and got up to go.

"But you can _always_ call me Mugi," she added, her voice catching, and then she was gone.

* * *

**Regionals**

"Wow! Look at that! And _that!_"

The convention centre was big and bustling. There were more school bands here than After-School Tea Time would have believed their region contained. Jun was fired up; Yui was agog (more than a blind person probably should have been). Even Mio and Azusa, who had watched past years' contests on television, were blown away by it all in person.

Ritsu smiled presidentially as she gazed upon her excited club. On this great occasion, there was just one thought in her head: _Well, we're screwed._

Sawako wasn't here. They'd tried to replace her yesterday, failed, and then forgotten the problem completely in the fuss of practicing. Tsumugi, of course, had had a backup plan... but she wasn't here either. And there was still that little problem of not being registered, which Ritsu had _also_ been counting on Tsumugi to solve.

There was nothing for it but to tell the truth. As soon as she had used up every single lie she could think of.

"Hey Mio," she said, "I'm gonna roll over and sign us in. Watch the kids."

The bassist snapped out of awestruck mode immediately. "Are you sure, Ritsu? Shouldn't we wait for Mugi?"

"It'll be fine. They'll let her in when she gets here."

"What if they don't?"

Ritsu shrugged. "Who notices if the _keyboard_ part is missing? Relax, she's probably just got a case of the deads or something. We'll play without her and then go find her body later."

"That's not funny! We have every reason to be worried!"

"Yeah, I know." The drummer looked down, trying not to make it obvious just how worried she was. "Look... whatever she's up to, we can't let it derail us at the last minute. We've gotta get in there and get ready."

Mio sighed. "I guess you're right. Let's go talk to -"

"NO! Let me. You hold the fort here."

Before her friend could protest, Ritsu began rolling to the sign-in counter. Why waste time arguing when it was about to become a moot point? They would be out on the curb for three different reasons in a matter of minutes. She would take her lumps then... unless, of course, her last-ditch brilliant emergency plan succeeded.

As she approached, Ritsu got a good look at the volunteer at the counter - and nearly laughed out loud. She looked to be about Sawa-chan's age, but she was wearing her hair in pigtails just like Azusa. What a joke! Did she think it made her look young? 'Cause if so, Ritsu had news for -

"Name?" asked the volunteer.

Ritsu froze. _Oh crap. What the hell was my last-ditch brilliant emergency plan?_

The woman cleared her throat. "Name, please?"

"R...Ritsu Tainaka."

"I mean the name of your school."

"Ah. Saku- oh yeah! Now I remember!"

She stared. "Remember what?"

"Nothing. Sakuragaoka High School. We're number one on the west side."

Raising an eyebrow, the volunteer looked down the list of participating schools. "I don't see any Sakuragaoka here."

"What? Lemme see that." Ritsu grabbed the list and scanned as fast as she could. No good, no good... _there!_ Perfect!

"_Excuse_ me." The woman grabbed the list back from Ritsu.

"Very sorry, ma'am. That was rude of me. But will you check again, please? Like I said, it's Sasunori High."

"Didn't you say -"

"Nope. Sasunori. We're number one on the west side."

The volunteer stared skeptically at Ritsu, but she put a checkmark next to the school in question and consulted another binder. "Very well. There are four of you?"

"And a handler, yeah." _Sorry, Mugi,_ Ritsu thought. _Didn't see one with enough members in time._

"I'll just need to see your supervisor before you sign in."

_This is it. Go for the gold._ "You're lookin' at her. Pleased to meet you."

"No, your supervisor. The teacher in charge of your club."

"That's me! What, just because I'm a little young, you think I can't teach? Or is this anti-disabled prejudice? Does my wheelchair scare you? Am I too _mobile_ for you?"

This was the moment of truth. The volunteer had to back down now to avoid giving offense. Come on... come on...

"No, not too mobile," she said, stonefaced. "Perhaps a bit too female. _Mr. Urashima._"

Damn.

"Okay, lemme explain. Uh... once upon a dark and stormy -"

"Please stop wasting my time. You're not the only band that missed the registration deadline. You'll just have to wait for next year like the others."

"But - no! Come on, you can't do this! It's all my fault! Don't make my friends suffer for it!"

"How _noble_."

"Noble, heck! They'll kick my butt! See the tall one with the black hair? Hits like a frickin' Navy SEAL! Think of my beautiful face!"

The volunteer put the binders away. "You can leave now or I can call security."

"No, please! Listen!" There was panic in Ritsu's eyes. It had finally sunk in on her that this was for real. "M-money! I'll give you money!"

She took a glance at Ritsu's clothes. "You couldn't afford me."

"Then services! I'm a drummer! I'll drum for you!"

_That_ offer got her nothing but a scowl.

"Come on! Please! I don't care what you do to me, but let my friends in! It's all my own stupid fault! It's..."

The end of the sentence was too quiet for the volunteer to hear. "Pardon?"

"It's _always_ my fault!" shouted Ritsu, and the volunteer was startled to see tears in her eyes. "Always! Every problem we have, everything that goes wrong! I forget to sign stuff, I freak Mio out, I make stupid bets with Yui when the principal's right outside! I'm the only one who blew her cover this whole month!"

"Your what?"

Rubbing her eyes, Ritsu didn't hear. "It's all me... They'd be at Budokan by now without me..."

The volunteer had no idea how to handle this. "Um... I'm sorry, but without a teacher..."

"Even that's probably my fault!" moaned the drummer. "I'm the one who twisted her arm into supervising us! I never knew how much she resented it..."

Unnoticed, someone gently put a hand on Ritsu's shoulder.

"Maybe if we'd kept looking, we coulda found a _real_ supervisor who wouldn't have flaked out on -"

Now Ritsu noticed the hand - it was squeezing her shoulder painfully. "Ow! Hey, what giv- _Sawa-chan?_"

Her teacher smiled warmly. "Is that the nickname today, Kinu? I keep telling you to call me Miss Inori. Sorry I'm late."

"Ki-what? I -" Sawako's eyes shut Ritsu down.

She turned to the volunteer. "Hello, ma'am. I must apologize for my student here... she's a little problematic. I'm guessing she told you some strange things about our club."

"Er... yes. Are you her teacher?"

"Indeed. Lovable scamp, isn't she?"

The volunteer stared. "But..."

"This is her favourite hobby, making up stories and acting them out with strangers. I'm sure what she told you was very dramatic. I apologize for the confusion it caused."

"Um. That's... all right?"

"Thank you. Now then, is this where we sign in?"

Ritsu practically jumped out of her chair. "Wait! You don't -"

Sawako pressed down firmly on Ritsu's shoulders. "Settle down, dear," she said - and winked.

The message was clear. She'd been briefed. Ritsu relaxed a bit. But how? When? Who could have... ohhh. The drummer turned, and of _course_ Tsumugi was there, greeting the other band members.

"Go join them, Kinu," said Sawako. "I'll get us registered."

Still dumbstruck, the drummer nodded and began rolling over to her friends. As she receded, she heard the volunteer say, "All right then... what school are you _really_ from?"

"Ryuumei Academy," said Sawako brightly. "We're number one on the west side."

* * *

A few minutes later, Sawako came over, holding an envelope. "You're playing on Stage C at three," she told the band. "I have your -"

The sentence was cut short by Yui hugging the air out of her lungs. "Sawa-chan!" she cried. "Thank you! Thank you so much for coming back!"

Ritsu rolled her eyes. "Have a _little_ self-respect, wouldja?"

"This is the same Sawa-chan who insulted us and quit," Mio agreed.

Yui shook her head (as far as she could with Sawako's chest in the way). "All is forgiven! She came back when we needed her!"

Ui put a hand on her sister's shoulder. "Um..."

"You can't spell Hirasawa without _Sawa_!" continued Yui, on a roll.

"Big sister?"

"Yes?"

"She's turning blue."

"Oops." She let go. Sawako staggered back, gasping for breath.

Ritsu muttered to Tsumugi, "Did you get that treatment too?"

"Yes," said the blonde, looking slightly disappointed. "But she didn't have a pun for me."

Sawako had her colour back now. "Listen, everyone... I owe you an apology. I was wrong. I went off chasing a crazy hope, but I know now that this is where I belong. I promise I'll always stick with you from now on."

"If we don't win today, you won't have the chance," said Azusa, arms crossed.

The teacher raised an eyebrow, surprised at the source of the criticism. "Hello, Azusa. Nice tan."

"Do you think things can just go back the way they were? As if you never did it?"

"I sorta hoped," Sawako admitted.

"Why don't you just go back to that rich guy of yours? Maybe we don't want you back!"

Mio quickly leaned over and whispered in Azusa's ear, "We do. We _really do._ Get mad later!"

"She's crazy!" added Ritsu, pointing at the rhythm guitarist.

It wasn't necessary; Sawako wasn't going anywhere. "Azusa, I don't blame you for being mad, and I'll answer your question. Why don't I go back to Tetsuo? Because he was lying and using me. He wasn't really rich at all."

Azusa went wide-eyed. "Are you serious?"

"Completely."

"I'm... I mean, it doesn't make everything okay, but... that's awful, Teacher! That's just awful!"

"I _told_ you what men were like," Mio said to Ritsu.

"Spies are the worst!" said Yui with a frown.

Jun tried not to react to that. "How'd you figure him out, Teacher?"

Sawako explained about the tag on Tetsuo's suit. Ritsu whistled. "Good eye, Sawa-chan."

"Not good enough," she said sadly. "His behaviour was suspicious all along. If only I had let myself notice... gotten out before it was too late..."

"It's not too late!" said Mio. "You're still young!" (Ritsu suppressed a chuckle.)

"No, I mean... I could have spared myself the humiliation of being turned down."

"What do you mean? He _was_ dating you... wait." Mio had just remembered exactly how Sawako had been talking on her way out the door. "You were all gung-ho for marriage. Teacher... you didn't..."

"You _proposed_?" said Ui, wide-eyed.

Sawako looked down and muttered, "Technically, I proposed that _he_ propose..."

Her confirmation hung in the air for a moment. Azusa hesitantly asked, "Didn't we first see him with you a month ago? How long before that..."

"Not long. That was our second date, I think."

There was total silence.

"What?" asked Sawako, looking around at them.

Ritsu's face was like a bag of popcorn in the microwave.

"Is there some problem with -"

The drummer couldn't take it anymore. She burst. "HAHAHAHAHA! You - HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Ritsu's laughter broke the others' composure. Soon all of them (Tsumugi excepted) had let their serious faces slip, and several were chuckling too. Sawako glared at them, hands on her hips. "_Excuse_ me! What exactly is so funny about the worst moment of my life?"

Mio struggled to answer. "It's... mmph... Sawa-chan, did you really..."

"You _proposed_ after a _month_?" said Azusa, smirking uncontrollably.

"Yes! So what?"

Yui grinned. "You're so bold, Sawa-chan!"

"HAHAHA! You're nuts! Bonkers! _Off yer gourd!_" That was Ritsu, of course.

Sawako was beet-red by this point. "Stop it! What's with this reaction?"

"We're sorry, Ms. Sawako," said Ui (smiling, but perfectly composed as always). "It's just very unusual for a proposal to be made so fast, especially by a woman."

"Hey! Some people get engaged before they've even met!"

"But you were _dating_," said Mio. "That's a whole different thing. What you did was like... like trying to climb a staircase in one step."

"Of COURSE ya scared him off!" said Ritsu, still cracking up. "Any guy in the world would be outta there! You made yourself look crazier than a sack of cats!"

Sawako scowled, deeply embarrassed - about both her actions and the source of the explanation. The girls quickly noticed and got their amusement under control.

Except Ritsu, that is. "Hahaha! I bet he's out shoppin' for restraining orders right now!"

"Ritsu..." Mio warned half-heartedly.

"And electric fences! And a _dog!_"

Mio stepped back. _Suit yourself. I tried._

"And mace! And a taser! And -"

* * *

25 seconds later, Ritsu was basically dead.

"Owwwwwwww," she moaned. "Don't they have security here?"

"Only inside," said Azusa, who, like the others, was a little shocked at Sawako's incredibly disproportionate response but didn't dare say so.

"That's why you don't mock a woman in pain," declared the teacher.

Ritsu groaned. "_I'm_ a woman in pain."

"Oh, does it hurt too much to walk? Maybe we should get you a wheelchair."

"Har-dee har har."

As Ritsu recovered, Sawako got back to the task at hand. She began distributing the girls' entrance passes, which doubled as name tags. "Don't lose these," she said. "There's a fee."

Yui gave her pass a baffled look. "Why does it say my name is Noriko Nishizaki?"

"Clerical error," said the teacher. "That's what Ritsu was trying to sort out when I got here. It turns out they accidentally mixed up our registration form with an old one from Ryuumei Academy. So we're not listed and that school is."

"We're going to use other people's name tags?" said Azusa skeptically.

"Yes. It was the best they could do at this point. We're marked as that school on the schedule too. It's annoying, but we'll have to live with it." She hesitated; this next part would be a hard sell. "In fact, it'll be easiest if we all just answer to the names on our passes."

The band stared. Jun said, "That was a joke, right?"

"No. People will be expecting those names. Let's just use them."

Mio and Azusa were aghast, but before they could decide whether this was worth fighting over, Yui beat them to it. "That's not fair, Sawa-chan."

"I know, but life's not always fair."

"This is _too_ unfair." Yui was frowning deeply. "It's our big chance! We're here to show the world how amazing we are! What's the point if we can't use our real names?"

Sawako glanced at Tsumugi, who nodded.

"Oh, fine," said the teacher. "But _I'm_ not explaining it every time. You get to do that part."

There was general relief. Azusa was particularly impressed. _Senior... you really do care about these things. I'm sorry I doubt you so often._

Yui leaned over and whispered to Azusa, "That was close! I nearly had to make up a new name for Giita!"

The younger girl fought the urge to smack her forehead. _That wasn't Yui's only reason. It wasn't. I'll keep telling myself that until I believe it._

"You said 3 o'clock, right?" Jun asked Sawako.

"Yes. You get the warm-up room at 2, so we'll meet there. Until then, you're free."

"Free?"

"To look around! There's lots to do here. Go have some fun and check out the competition. You can stick together if you want to, or -"

"No, I getcha," said Jun, rubbing her chin. "We can cover more ground if we split up."

Sawako blinked. "Cover... what?"

"I'll start! Come on, Azusa, let's case this joint!"

"What are you - hey!" Azusa was yanked along. The two of them disappeared into the crowd.

Yui made an exaggerated bow to Ui. "Shall we be on our way, madam?"

"By all means!" said Ui, curtseying.

Ritsu grabbed Yui's sleeve. "One thing before you go."

"Yes?"

"You are blind. You are blind. You are blind, you are blind, you are blind. Blind blind blinditty blind-blind blind. Got it?"

"It's mean to make fun of the blind, Ricchan."

"Long as we understand each other. Run along now." They did.

Sawako glanced at her phone. "I still have a few things to attend to," she said. "I'll catch up with you girls later, all right?"

"Sure," said Ritsu. "And thanks, Sawa-chan." The teacher grinned the way only praise could make her grin.

"Good luck," said Mio. "But."

"But what?" asked Sawako, suddenly noticing that the bassist had put her glasses on.

"But if you disappear on us again, we will never, _ever_ forgive you. EVER." As she spoke, Mio oh-so-silently took out her own cell phone and turned it so Sawako could see the wallpaper image... of her younger self in full Death Devil regalia.

The teacher went slightly green. "O-of course not. I'm with you."

"Glad to hear it. See you later!" She gave a polite little wave.

Sawako walked away, shuddering. For the first time, she wondered if it had been a mistake to force even a small gimmick on Mio.

* * *

_That's the last of them,_ thought Mio, glasses now back in her pocket. She looked at Ritsu. _It's time, isn't it?_

Ritsu nodded solemnly. _Yep. Time to wrangle the elephant in the room._

Together, they looked at Tsumugi.

"I will also explore on my own for the time being," the blonde said.

"Listen, Mugi... are you okay?" Mio asked.

"Of course!"

The bassist gently put a hand on her friend's shoulder. "It's just us now, Mugi. There's no one here you need to keep secrets from. We've been so worried about you... _please_ talk to us."

For a moment, Tsumugi was totally silent, her face unreadable. Then her smile returned. "Thank you very much, but I am fine."

Ritsu looked skeptical. "Well, why'dja vanish on us last night?"

"I received an emergency message from Ms. Sawako. She was very upset after the incident with Mr. Tsukamoto and needed help getting home. I also gave her a ride this morning, which is why I was late. There is nothing to worry about."

The drummer tapped Tsumugi's midsection with a drumstick. "And is _this_ nothin' to worry about too?"

"I am simply out of sha-"

"Pregnant," said Mio. "You're faking a pregnancy. We ignored it as long as we could, but it's the only 'gimmick' that fits."

Ritsu counted the evidence on her fingers. "A, it had to be something so horrible Sawa-chan couldn't tell us. B, she couldn't resist doing it anyway, so it had to be a good gimmick. And C, fat isn't a good gimmick. Let's face it, nobody likes the fat kid. But a pretty thing like you, all babied up and still doing her best? It's the feel-good movie of the year."

"I still can't believe she made you do it," said Mio, shaking her head. "If we'd only realized sooner..."

"Ms. Sawako didn't force me," said Tsumugi. "She _asked_ me."

"But a request from a teacher is really -"

"This one was not. She gave me many chances to change my mind. I am wearing this of my own free will."

"_Why?_ What could be worth it?"

Ritsu sighed. "Come on, Mugi. You're not tellin' us the whole story here."

Again, for just a moment, Tsumugi seemed to teeter on the edge of opening up... but the moment passed. She smiled her everyday smile. "Please, you don't need to worry so much about me. Everything is all right."

Mio looked away in frustration. "Fine. I guess we'll see you later, then."

She nodded. "Have fun!" Showing her pass at the entrance, Tsumugi vanished into the crowd.

_Liar,_ Mio thought sadly. Tsumugi's lips had said she was fine, but her eyes had said she was dying inside.

Ritsu patted Mio's arm. "Nothin' we can do if she won't let us. Let's try not to sweat over it."

"How can we ignore this? Ritsu... what's _happening_ to her? Why won't she tell us?"

"No idea." (Actually, she had a couple of guesses, but kept them to herself.) "Look, this is Mugi we're talkin' about. She's made of rubber and Teflon. She'll be back to normal in no time, freakin' us out in the usual ways instead of this weird new way. Till then..."

"Well? Till then, what?"

Ritsu looked down. "We take it. If Mugi's man enough to handle this alone, we gotta be man enough to let her."

They were quiet for a minute.

"It hurts, doesn't it?" asked Mio. "Knowing someone's in pain, but she won't open up to you."

"Sure, if you wanna be melodramatic about it." Ritsu started rolling to the entrance.

"And how long have you felt responsible for all our problems?"

She stopped rolling. "You... you heard that?"

"Yeah. Don't worry, the others didn't."

There was a long pause, and then Ritsu forced a laugh. "I was just puttin' on a show for 'em. Reinforcing the gimmickry, y'know?"

"Uh huh." Mio caught up to her. "I know when you're lying, Ritsu. You're not good at it."

"Better than _you_."

The bassist swatted her lightly on the wrist. "Now you know what happens when you bottle things up. Talk to me next time, all right?"

Ritsu swatted back. "Do you have to make a big deal of this? I just felt kinda guilty all of a sudden. I'm not in a depression spiral or anything."

"Okay."

"...But thanks."

"Any time."

They were almost inside when it hit Ritsu. "Wait a minute. If you heard _that_, how much else did you -"

"We'll fight later," said Mio.

* * *

Unnoticed in the crowd, Principal Yamada watched each of the Light Music Club's various subgroups come through the main gate. _About time,_ he thought. Admittedly, they weren't scheduled to play for a few hours yet, but he would have thought any self-respecting band would make a point of getting here as early as possible.

His daughter's group wasn't on stage till afternoon either. What to do in the meantime...?

Well, he could always see what kind of music teachers the other schools had.

After all, if the band practices Principal Yamada had been listening to were any indication, he would probably be looking for a new one tomorrow.

* * *

**Next: Zero Hour**

[A/N: Two chapters to go! Last time I'll change the count, I swear. Be here next time for the big performance. No, they're not gonna do Journey... not that I've heard of any show that did, of course.]


	9. Never Going Back Again

Sawako got outside, leaned back against the building, and took a deep breath. She'd taken care of the urgent matters: getting the band into Regionals and reclaiming her role of supervisor. Now she had time to think. And there was something very important to think about.

According to Tsumugi, she had quit her job at Sakuragaoka yesterday. _Had_ she?

Sawako forced herself to remember the day in as much detail as possible. She'd woken up late because she'd been too excited to get to sleep the night before. She'd hurried out the door without breakfast, eager to get free of her responsibilities once and for all. She'd gone straight for the principal's office. And then... then what?

Oh! The sign! There had been a "Do Not Disturb" sign on his door. She'd decided to come back later.

Sawako's memory was clearing up now. All morning, she'd kept visiting the office looking for a chance, but that sign had always been there. At noon, she'd given up — she needed the afternoon to prepare, and besides, she was starving. The big resignation would have to wait. As for her classes (which had been afternoon-only that day), she'd spoken to the secretary, cited some kind of emergency, and gotten a substitute.

That settled it. She hadn't quit. So now the question was... why not? With the roller-coaster momentum she'd worked up, what had stopped her from just bursting in on Principal Yamada and _shouting_ her intentions?

Sawako remembered being determined to see "the look on his face". But why? What was important about that? She didn't even know him all that well. Quitting had been her one and only goal all morning. What could have taken an even higher priority?

Well, she'd have to figure it out later. The important thing was that she _hadn't_ quit her job, and that meant she wouldn't need to plead desperately to get it back. Small blessings.

She checked her watch. _Four hours till the meetup. That should be just enough time._

With no immediate danger, Sawako could focus on the mission. Everything still hinged on Regionals. She had no intention of faltering. Her girls were going to _win_ this — not just to save her job, but because they deserved to.

Sawako had come up with gimmicks for them and done all she could to help on the music end. But she still had one more talent to bring into play.

As she'd requested, Tsumugi's driver was waiting at the curb. Sawako got in. "Back to where you picked us up," she said. "I've got work to do."

* * *

"Okay, listen," said Azusa. "I've hid under restaurant tables. I've peeked through windows. I've created diversions. I've listened at doorways with a teacup. I've worn full-body animal costu—"

Jun interrupted, "Are you going somewhere with this?"

"The point is, I've been involved in some pretty weak attempts at stealth. And I'm telling you that this one is the weakest. By a _lot_."

"Objection noted. Now come on!"

Sighing deeply, Azusa crawled underneath the cardboard box Jun had found. Her friend squeezed in with her and pulled the box down over them.

"Ow!"

"Shh!"

"It's too tight!"

"Quit shoving!"

After a minute or so, the box settled down, its inhabitants having gotten as comfortable as possible (which wasn't very). Jun popped open the eye hole she'd prepared. "Okay. Now remember, _slow_!"

The box began to creep forward.

Next door, in one of the warmup rooms, a short-haired girl with a guitar was scolding her bandmates. "That sucked! We've gotta do better if we're gonna win this! Back to the top!"

"Again?" the drummer complained.

"Look, this is our chance! We're not just some garage band, we're Gang of Girlz! If we're gonna show the world our skill, it starts here! _From! The! Top!_"

With a collective sigh, the other members took their positions. On the guitarist's signal, they launched into a loud song about beating an inadequate boyfriend with a pipe.

As they played, the door was slowly nudged open. Once the gap was wide enough, a box began to make its way into the room. Inch by inch, silent as a ninja, it crept in, unnoticed by any—

"Um, Akira?"

The guitarist practically hurled her instrument down. "You'd better have a _damn_ good reason for stopping us, Sachi!"

"Well, it's just..." She pointed at the door.

Akira, who'd been facing the other way, turned around. Her stare grew cold as she took in the scene: the door she remembered closing was mysteriously half-open, with an upside-down box most of the way through.

The drummer scratched her head. "It's been, uh, sort of coming inside."

Akira looked closer. The box was jiggling.

"OH! Oh, I _knew_ it!" she shouted, throwing a pick across the room. "I knew Yokohama would try to steal our music! GET 'EM!"

"Abort! Abort!" said Jun. The box flew into the air and she and Azusa ran for their lives.

A few minutes of chaos later, the girls were hiding behind a corner, gasping for breath. "I... I think we... lost them," said Azusa.

"Yeah," said Jun, peering around the corner. "They're yelling at some other band now. Probably Yokohama."

"Can I get a concession now, please?"

Jun sighed. "You were right. Investigating the competition isn't important enough to resort to cartoon methods."

"I'm looking for something a little broader. Along the lines of 'Azusa has better judgment than I do'."

"Okay. I'll let you pick the disguises."

* * *

Back and forth, back and forth, Yui's eyes swept the room as she walked. She swung her cane with the same frequency, accidentally creating the illusion of purpose. Ui followed just behind.

"Stupid dark glasses," Yui muttered.

Her sister held back a sniff. Poor thing!

"Why do blind people bother wearing these? It doesn't make a difference to _them_, but it does to me!"

"Not all blind people's eyes look normal," Ui explained. "They wear the glasses so other people will feel comfortable."

Yui scowled. "Well, it doesn't work! I don't feel comfortable at all!"

The younger Hirasawa was torn. She hated to see Yui upset, but at the same time, her sister was committed to her "gimmick"; Ui would do her no favours by letting her quit now. She would just have to be strong.

A tear came to her eye. _Oh, Big Sister... let not my will, but yours be done..._

Yui began emitting a low rumbling noise. "Rrrrrrr."

"Pardon?"

"Rrrrrrr."

Ui stared. Sometimes that was all she could do.

"Rrrrrrr. Come on." Yui lowered her head in concentration. "RRRRRRR."

"Big Sister, what are you doing?"

"Echolocation! It's too dark to see underwater, right? So whales and things use sonar to find what they're looking for!"

Ui was pretty sure you couldn't use just _any_ sound for echolocation, but she didn't bother saying so. "Are you looking for something?"

"Some_one_. Rrrrrrr."

Ah, of course. "That boy you met."

"This is my big chance, Ui!" Her eyebrows took that determined slant her sister knew so well. "When we meet again here, he won't be able to deny the cosmic link between us! I'll grab him loose from that other girl and never let him go! Never ever!"

"Okay. I'll help you. What does he look like?"

Yui rolled her eyes. "I was _blind_ when I met him, Ui."

"Of... course." Ui didn't bother reminding her that she'd seen the boy's picture _before_ the gimmick, which was how she'd recognized him in the first place. Or that Mio could have described him. Or that for all her rumbling, she was obviously _looking_ around now.

As Yui continued her search, she remarked, "I'm gonna try singing to him again! There's this one Beatles song about an octopus's garden! I really identify with it!"

"How come?"

She turned back, quirking an eyebrow. "Take a guess!"

"Um... because... because octopuses have lots of arms to hug with?"

"Exactly! See, you understand me, Ui! Sometimes I think you're the only one!"

Ui blushed. "I'm always here for you, Big Sister."

"Like this thing with me and him! Everybody else thinks it's weird that I'm in love!"

"Well, you have only met him once..."

"No, that's not it. They think it's weird that I'm in love with _anybody_! Mio was all 'Have you been watching too much _Sensei and Ninomiya-kun_? Stop being interesting and go practice. Bla bla bla, waah waah waah."

Ui had to laugh. It was honestly a pretty good impression of Mio.

"But not you, Ui! You get it!"

"Well, I do have an advantage. I've known you my whole life. Your other friends don't know how much you used to love playing house and reading fairy tales about handsome princes."

"But why are they so surprised? I wouldn't find it strange if _they_ had boyfriends..."

Ui pondered. She knew the answer, of course — she could have written a thesis on Yui's psychological profile — but the challenge was finding the right way to explain it. "The thing is, Big Sister, you tend to be very... intense."

"You mean like power chords?"

What? "No, I mean your personality. When you get interested in something, it becomes all you can think about. Remember when you first got your guitar?"

Yui looked affectionately at the case in her left hand. "My fated meeting with Giita..."

"Right. You could hardly stop playing, even for meals. And then later, when you had those big tests, you crammed so hard you got 100% on them — and completely forgot how to play."

"Yeah. That was embarrassing."

"So you see what I mean, right? Your mind likes to run on one track at a time. When you're with your friends in the club, there are a few usual subjects: music, school work, tea..."

"And kitty cats!"

"Hmm?" Oh, right. Azusa. "Yes, those things. You talk about them, and other subjects don't enter your mind. Your friends are used to that. But now you have a new interest."

"My fiance!"

Ui supressed the urge to rub her forehead; apparently she'd missed the proposal. "That boy, yes. From the club's point of view, you've gone from _never_ talking about boys to never talking about anything _else_. That makes them think something weird must have happened."

"Wow," said Yui as she took it all in. "You're so smart, Ui!"

"I got it from you," she said, blushing.

"I'd forgotten how much we used to play house. That was fun!"

Ui hadn't forgotten, and doubted she ever would. When the Hirasawa sisters had played house, they had _really_ played it. Games would go for days at a time. Yui always played the husband; she would come home from her job (usually company president, sometimes mecha pilot, and on the occasion of one memorable misunderstanding, Pope) and Ui would always have her imaginary dinner ready. Both sisters got a real kick out of the arrangement and would keep it going as long as Yui's attention span held out. Come to think of it, had they ever called off that last game?

"But it's still not fair," said Yui. "I shouldn't have to SIGHTED!"

"To what?"

Yui was already halfway across the room. Ui picked up the cane her sister had dropped and chased after her. Looked like the game was on.

* * *

"And as big around as your —"

Mio held up a hand. "I've heard that one before. Tell a different lie."

"Oh. So there's this rabbit, right?"

A pair of girls from another school walked up to them. "Hi! Are you competitors today?"

"What's it to ya?" asked Ritsu, to her friend's embarrassment.

"We're journalism club members. Our school is nearby, but we don't have a band here, so we're hoping to do a spotlight on another group. Would you be interested?"

Ritsu's face lit up. _Publicity!_ "You've come to the right place, ladies. Right, Mio?"

"Er, right... but this isn't a good time..."

The drummer glared. "It is a _perfect_ ti—"

"You want to talk to all the members, right? Our group is scattered now, but maybe you could come and see us later when we meet up."

"Good idea!" said the student. "When will that be?"

Ritsu sighed. "Two o'clock, warmup room 3. Be there or be square."

She began rolling away. Mio bowed apologetically and followed her. "What's your problem, Ritsu?"

"More like what's your _malfunction_! We coulda had that interview to ourselves! Stardom! Fame!"

Mio glared. "Why are you like this? Your first instinct in every situation is to twist it to your own advantage!"

"That's everybody's first instinct! Gettin' ahead doesn't just happen. You've gotta fight for it."

"You know what, Ritsu? That's _Sawa-chan_ talk."

The drummer flinched slightly. "Well... so what? She's not wrong about everything."

"No, of course not. She's just scheming, unscrupulous, dishonest..."

"An' I suppose you're perfect?"

"I _want_ to be!" Mio slammed her hands down on the arms of Ritsu's wheelchair. "I want to succeed and still be able to sleep at night! But you don't care about that part, do you? Right and wrong are just afterthoughts to you!"

Ritsu blanched. "C'mon, Mio..."

"No! I should have seen it when you were upset before! You weren't feeling bad because the things you'd done were _wrong_, you just _hadn't gotten away with them!_"

"It's not like —"

"I think it is! God, Ritsu, why am I friends with you? Why do I keep letting you drag me down to your level?"

Fire flashed in the drummer's eyes. "Oh, that's rich! That's _billionaire_ rich! Why are _you_ friends with _me_? More like why am _I_ friends with a wet blanket like _you?_ What do I get outta hangin' out with a judgmental, whiny little porcelain statue whose only selling points are up front?"

"Classy as always!"

"You know it's true! What do you contribute to this friendship, huh? You're never any fun unless somebody's forcin' you! And when you're not bein' a drag, you're having some crisis! My little problem back there? That was the only time I've _ever_ hassled you with my issues, and I didn't even think you were listening! But _you_! Your breakdowns have breakdowns! I gotta hear about every little thing that makes your mental tree shed a leaf!"

Mio felt like she'd been stabbed. "Th-this isn't about me!"

"Why not? Everything else is!"

"You're just trying to avoid facing what I said! You don't care about being a good person, Ritsu! You do as little work as you can get away with, and you lie whenever the truth makes you look bad!"

"I do _not_!"

"Being friends with you means constantly lowering my standards. You put me in positions where I have to be like you, and I'm _sick_ of it! Here I am at my first big music contest, and I'm wearing someone else's name tag because of you!"

"You wouldn't be here in the first place without me!"

"Yeah, that's right! I'd be in the literature club, doing honest club activities that I _actually signed up for_!"

Ritsu rolled her eyes. "I shouldn'ta stopped you. That sounds like your personal paradise. Nothin' but boring books and boring duty. Shoulda saved the fun for the fun people."

"And I should have saved my friendship for people who deserved it."

The drummer laughed. "Oh, bein' friends was _your_ idea? Is that how you remember things? You wanna know the truth, Mio? Wanna know the _real_ reason we're friends?"

"Why?"

Ritsu's lips twisted into a cruel smile. "You were always a quiet little sad-sack. Nobody wanted your weepy, neurotic butt around. We're friends because _I felt sorry for you_."

Mio slapped Ritsu hard across the face.

"An'... an' you know what?" the drummer added. "I still do!"

Tears pouring down her face, Mio ran away into the crowd at top speed. Ritsu scoffed and rolled herself in the other direction.

* * *

Sawako's favourite thing about West End Costume Rentals was the discount section. When an outfit was too damaged to rent out, they would sell it as a fixer-upper instead. Someone with Sawako's skill could do the repairs easily and save a bundle.

When the teacher saw what was in stock today, she actually squealed with delight. Some play at a local theatre must have just wrapped. She'd been puzzling over the best theme to use for After-School Tea Time's costumes, but this would work perfectly. Some things were always popular, especially on young girls.

Sawako picked out one for each member and a few more for spare parts, then brought them up to the counter. The manager, a middle-aged man, whistled. "Big plans today, Sawako?"

She grinned. "The biggest."

He added up the price, but then wrote down a lower number. "Ten percent off," he said. "For always being a good customer."

Sawako gave a short bow. "You're too kind."

She was practical enough to know the store wouldn't give an off-the-books discount unless their markup was already higher than that, but she was flattered anyway.

As the manager packed up the outfits for her, Sawako couldn't help noticing the racks of tuxedos in back. "Can I ask for a small favour?" she said.

"Of course."

"There's a man named Tetsuo Tsukamoto who rents his suits here. I... I'd rather not go into detail, but he's up to no good. Can you stop renting to him?"

He looked at her thoughtfully. "Would that be legal, Sawako?"

"...Oh." Her face fell. "No, I suppose not. Sorry."

"No problem. Here are your purchases. Good luck!"

She thanked him and went on her way. The manager drummed his fingers on the table. He felt a bit dishonest, even though he hadn't lied, just let her draw her own conclusions.

West End reserved the right to deny service to anyone. Any sensible business did. But Tsukamoto, just like Sawako, was a good customer.

Well... maybe he wouldn't offer him a discount next time.

* * *

After an exhausting morning of spying on bands and ducking out of sight whenever "Gang of Girlz" came nearby, Azusa and Jun were taking lunch in the food court.

"The buns here aren't bad," said Azusa.

"I've had better," Jun remarked, still chewing. "There's this one legend about — oh! Hang on."

The bassist pulled out her phone and stared at it. Her excitement quickly faded. She put it back.

"What was that about?"

"Nothing. I thought I felt it vibrate."

They resumed eating. After a few minutes, Jun took her phone out again and set it on the table, where she would glance at it every few seconds like a driver checking her mirrors.

"Are you by any chance waiting for a call, Jun?" her friend asked.

"M-maybe. I mean, I'll be fine without it. I would just feel better."

"Who are you hoping to hear from?"

Jun paused for a long moment. "My doctor," she said.

"Oh?"

"I may have bass cancer."

"I see."

"It's 93 percent fatal."

"Wow."

"I probably don't have it. But bassists need to get tested every so often. Just to be on the safe side."

"What are the symptoms?"

"Your voice gets lower, mostly."

Azusa nodded and took a sip of her drink, considering what to ask next. She was sure Jun could keep this up as long as she wanted to, but she felt like making her do it anyway, out of spite.

Just then, the phone buzzed. (Azusa vaguely remembered the ringtone as the theme from an anime... "Puri" something?) Like lightning, Jun popped the phone open and read the message inside. Her eyes went wide. With a quick "B.R.B.!" to Azusa, she dashed away.

Azusa just stared for a moment, confused. Then her eyes fell on Jun's cell phone. She had left it on the table in her rush, and there was no way Azusa could catch up with her to return it.

For a moment that felt much longer than it was, the guitarist wrestled with her conscience.

She picked up the phone. _I'm just seeing where Jun went,_ she justified to herself. _It could be important. I mean, maybe she really does have bass cancer. Best for me to know now so I can support her, right?_

The message inside was from someone Jun had labeled "Fleet Admiral Mega Yamato". It read _We need to talk. I'm out front._

Below the message was the last one Jun had sent to this contact. Azusa couldn't stop herself from reading on.

And as she read, all the puzzle pieces fell into place... forming a picture she wished she'd never seen.

* * *

"Hey! _Hey!_"

Southwest Tokyo Academy's guitarist turned around. That voice sounded familiar. But it couldn't —

"My love! We've finally found each other again!"

It _was_. "You're that girl from the store!"

"And from your _dreams_! You've been having the dreams too, right? That one with the bear was scary!"

"I... what?"

"Now we can finally get together! But first..." Yui lowered her voice conspiratorially. "Is that girl around? We'll have to ditch her!"

"What? No, she —"

"Oh good. Catch!"

"Catch wha— aaack!" Yui had attempted to leap into his arms. The result was a haphazard pile of guitarists on the floor.

"I've waited so long!" said Yui, squeezing his midsection. "It's been so much worse than just waiting for a bus!"

"H-hold on."

"I am!" She squeezed tighter.

"No, I mean... oof!" The target of Yui's affection finally managed to get to his feet. He began trying to pull her arms apart. "You need to listen!"

"You should let him speak," Ui whispered in her sister's ear.

"He can speak while I'm holding him!" said Yui, eyes closed in bliss.

"It's just that you shouldn't assume he's —"

"I'm not assuming! He's my boyfriend, so I know his thoug— OWW!" Yui jumped back, startled. Her cheek was red.

The boy looked down at his fingers guiltily. "I'm sorry I had to resort to that," he said.

"You _pinched_ me!"

"You weren't listening. Look, I'm flattered by your interest in me. You seem like a very nice..." _Maniac. Lunatic. Stalker._ "...girl."

"And you're a nice boy too! See, it works!"

"But I have no idea who you are! You just came out of nowhere at me! Twice!"

"It was love at first sight! Don't you believe in it?"

"Uh... maybe? But I, I don't feel..."

Yui frowned. "Well, _I_ feel it for _you_. Take responsibility!"

"Okay, that's enough," he said, raising a hand to block her. "I'm NOT your boyfriend."

The girl guitarist was quiet for several seconds; then she spun around and began marching away. "Regroup!" she called out to her sister. "We need a battle plan!"

"Hold on a moment, Big Sister," she replied. She made a polite bow to the Southwest Tokyo guitarist. "Pleased to meet you. I would like to formally present Yui Hirasawa from Sakuragaoka High School." She gestured to Yui. "I am her younger sister, Ui. May I ask your name?"

"Uh, Matsuo Otoko," he said, returning the bow.

"Thank you. It's been very awkward talking about you without knowing that." She turned to follow her sister.

* * *

In her high school days, Ms. Kawasumi would never have touched a cigarette. She hadn't started smoking until sometime in college. Her young adulthood had been a time of disillusionment; she'd picked up some bad habits in trying to cope. Nowadays she was in a perpetual state of half-heartedly trying to quit, and she tended to slip on days of particular stress and exhaustion.

Not to mention hangovers. Thanks again, Yamasu!

She stepped out the back door of the convention centre, since smoking, of course, wasn't allowed inside. There were a couple of other adults milling around; Kawasumi instinctively looked for an isolated spot. As she glanced back and forth, something caught her eye. By the side of the building, so far away she was almost out of sight, there was a student — not smoking, just sitting on the curb and looking absolutely miserable.

A blonde student. In fact... wasn't that _her_ student?

"Excuse me," she said to one of the other smokers. "Do you know if that girl is okay?"

The woman sighed. "Probably not, but she won't talk to anyone."

"How long has she been like that?"

"I don't know, but she's been there every time I've come outside. She's registered, so she's allowed to be here. I just wish someone from her band would come for her."

"They probably think she's fine," muttered Kawasumi.

"What?"

"I know that student. She doesn't talk about her problems. Whatever's wrong, I'll bet she hid it from them until she could be alone."

_And this is just the place,_ Kawasumi reflected. _Her friends and Sawako don't smoke. She didn't know I would be here._

_Maybe she still shouldn't._

There was no reason in the world Kawasumi had to get herself involved. Tsumugi was on her own time. Whatever was wrong, she had family and friends who were better equipped to help than some teacher. And even if it was something she couldn't talk to them about... well, so what? How did Kawasumi expect to help? She was no psychiatrist or guidance counsellor.

She should just slip away before Tsumugi noticed her. This was none of her concern. Hell, she wouldn't even be here if Yamasu hadn't needed a ride.

But...

Maybe it was just the contrast with Tsumugi's usual perky demeanour. But in nearly a decade of teaching, Kawasumi was sure she had never seen a student in such absolute despair. If she walked away now, and no one else came to help...

_Damn it all._

Kawasumi took a slow first step toward her student. She'd have to be careful not to scare her off. Suddenly, the woman she had been talking to caught her by the arm. "Hey! You'd better finish smoking that first."

"Why?"

She snuck a glance at Tsumugi and whispered, "The _baby!_"

Discarding her cigarette and proceeding, Kawasumi made a mental note that she hated everyone and everything.

* * *

"Boss!" said Jun, hurrying out the main entrance to where Ms. Yamasu was waiting. "I got your message!"

"And I got yours," said the teacher. "We need to talk."

"Great! WOO! Let me explain my —"

Jun stopped. Ms. Yamasu had suddenly curled up in a ball on the ground.

"Are you okay?"

"Owww," she said. "No cheering, Jun. It's very, very important."

"How come?"

The teacher struggled to her feet. "Last night, I... I developed a severe allergy to loud noises."

Jun raised an eyebrow.

"Ask again when you're older and I'll tell you something different. Now listen, did the club get through registration?"

"Yep! Target Prime came back! She got us all set up!" The bassist held up her name tag.

"Uh, that says 'Otome Kurogane'."

"Yeah! The aliases are the best part!"

"Right." Yamasu scratched her head. "And when do you actually perform?"

"Three o'clock! We picked our setlist last night. I don't think Target Prime knows yet that we switched back to Target M's songs, but she'll probably let it go. She's been all apologetic."

"Which ones will you be doing?"

"They're called 'Fluffy Fluffy Time' and 'My Love is a Stapler'. The words are kinda weird, but I like the music. The first one has this bridge section where they switch to a whole different style. Oo, and Yui's been trying these new power chords! It's like JYAA JA JA JYAA JYAA — oh, sorry." Yamasu was on the ground in agony again.

"One... one minute," said the teacher, pulling herself up with the aid of a nearby mailbox. She closed her eyes and held very still until the screaming pain in her head had cleared. "Okay. Jun, I want you to play that back in your head. Listen to how you sounded. How _enthusiastic_ you were."

"W-was I?"

"Very. Do you see my point now? You're having a great time in this club. You don't really want to pull some stunt and hurt them."

Jun glared. "Of course I do! That's the whole reason I joined!"

"Because this club and ours are rivals, right? Jun, I spent some time with Sawako last night. She _didn't even know_ about this rivalry. Neither did I until you told me."

"W-what? We've always been rivals!"

"Not that I've ever heard, and this is my eighth year running the club. Know what I think? You just like being rivals with that friend of yours... Azusa, is it?"

"Shh! It's Target Zero!"

Yamasu winced; the codenames never failed to make her head hurt, which she really didn't need right now. "The point is, you're friends, you're in the same year, you're both musicians... and you joined two different clubs. _To you_, that makes those clubs rivals. But I'm telling you right now, it's _only_ for you two. There is no club war at Sakuragaoka."

"But... then..."

"...there's no reason to sabotage them," Yamasu finished. "So _don't_."

Jun's eyes blazed. "I have to! It's all been leading up to this!"

"Yes, I see that now. I never stopped you before because I thought you were just playing around. I figured you would pull some prank eventually and that would be that. But now you're talking about sabotaging a _concert_ — their first big concert ever. You can't do that."

"Watch me!" The bassist spun around.

"Jun, get it through your head! _No one wants you to do this!_"

"Oh yeah?" Jun turned. "Get _this_ through _your_ head..."

She leaned over, right in front of Ms. Yamasu's ear, and screamed, "YOU'RE TOO LATE!"

The teacher's world was made up entirely of pain for the next 25 minutes or so. It was no surprise that, when she came to her senses, Jun was gone.

Reluctantly, Ms. Yamasu took out her phone. _I gave the kid a chance,_ she thought. _I owed her that much for not taking her seriously. Whatever happens now is all on her._

* * *

Matsuo was at one of the vendors' booths examining some guitar strings when he heard a now-familiar voice behind him.

"I'd like to be... under the sea... in an octopus's garden in the shade..."

He turned. "I said no."

But Yui wasn't listening. She'd stopped playing and turned to Ui. "Why would there be shade underwater?"

"Well, Big Sister..."

Matsuo took the opportunity to slip away. His only regret was not getting to hear the explanation. That was going to bug him now.

* * *

Mio sat alone at one of the lunch tables, sipping coffee and taking the occasional half-hearted bite of her food. She'd given up trying to distract herself with the various activities at Regionals. Nothing worked; nothing got Ritsu's words out of her head.

Well, she'd just have to try something else after lunch. In a couple of hours, she and Ritsu would have to play together, and that meant calming themselves down enough to —

"Hey," said a black-haired girl with a ponytail, diving into the seat opposite her. "Start talking to me and act natural."

Mio blinked. "What? Who are —"

"_Act natural!_"

"Um..." Mio suddenly wished she'd read that spy manga Ritsu had tried to lend her once. "S-so how are you? I, uh, haven't seen you since Yuuki's daughter got married. It must be nice to be that young, eh?"

The girl rolled her eyes. "Natural for _us_, not for old ladies. Okay, you can see the door. Has anyone followed me in yet?"

"N-no."

"Whew. They must not have seen me after all." She reached back and untied her ponytail. As she rearranged her hair, a few things clicked into place for Mio. A familiar voice, a certain skin tone...

...and a pair of pigtails that were now taking shape. "Azusa?"

"You didn't recognize me? _Again?_ Why is my face so unmemorable?"

"I, uh..." Mio had no idea how to answer that. "Why were you hiding?"

"There's a gang after me. It's a long story." The junior student finished putting her familiar hairstyle back together.

"I thought you were with Jun."

"She's... taking a call," said Azusa, with an odd look that Mio couldn't place. "I thought you'd be with Ritsu."

The bassist snorted. "She's just fine by herself. I don't need her pity anyway."

"...Pity?"

"Oh, didn't you know? That's the only reason she's friends with me."

"Ah... you had a fight?"

Mio began to explain, and soon the words were pouring out. She hadn't realized how much she needed to talk to someone. Nowadays, Nodoka was her usual sounding board when she was mad at Ritsu, and they saw each other in every class, so there was never long to wait. Mio had come to depend pretty heavily on that release.

Taking it all in, Azusa nodded. "I'm sorry, Senior."

"Who does Ritsu think she is? After the way she's acted, _she_ gets to judge _me_?"

Azusa looked awkward; Mio quickly realized why. "Sorry! I shouldn't make you pick sides between us. I'm just so frustrated..."

"I understand," said the junior student. "I get annoyed with Ritsu too. But..."

"But what?"

"Well, I don't want to presume..."

"It's all right. I... I could use your advice."

Azusa blushed slightly. "First of all, you know Ritsu didn't mean it about feeling sorry for you, right?"

"Really? She sounded serious to me..."

"Well, maybe at the very start. You told us how you two met, back when you were too shy to talk to anyone. But that was a long time ago. These days, if anything, _she_ depends on _your_ pity. You know, homework-wise."

The bassist couldn't believe that hadn't occurred to her. "Yes... she _does_, doesn't she?"

"And Ritsu may be more outgoing, but it's not like you don't have your own friends too. You got to know Nodoka without any help. And hey, you even have a fan club! _Ritsu_ doesn't have a — senior?"

Mio had turned to one side. She looked like she'd just been reminded of the time she swallowed a live cockroach.

"Sorry," said Azusa. "Bad example. The point is, Ritsu has no reason to feel sorry for you anymore. I'm sure she only said so because she was mad."

It began to occur to Mio that maybe, just maybe, she too had said some things in that fight that she wouldn't have said just any old time. "I'll... I'll think it over."

"Glad to hear it. I would never tell you what to do, senior, but it'll be a real problem if you and Ritsu can't play together."

"Well, I think I'll be okay now... but what about Ritsu? Do you think she'll forgive me?"

"Ritsu? I, uh... can't really picture her holding a grudge, senior."

Mio tried to picture it too. Then she smiled, realizing what Azusa had been too respectful to say outright: their friend just didn't have the attention span. Ritsu's head hurt when she thought about playing an instrument more complicated than the drums. She would be no better with complicated emotions.

"Thank you for this, Azusa," said Mio. Against all odds, she was really starting to feel better.

"G-glad I could help!" Blushing again, Azusa lowered her head to her chest...

...where Mio's eyes were immediately drawn to her name tag. The tag that read "Sunao Konoe."

Mio felt the weight of her own tag. It declared for the whole world to see that her name was Yashi Nagomi. It was a lie. By wearing it, she endorsed that lie. And she had no choice... because of her best friend.

The friend who had pressured her to join the light music club and forced Ms. Sawako to supervise it. Who had happily gone along with faking a disability for a month. Who had obviously never turned in their registration form, resorting instead to some asinine scheme.

The friend who had tried to bribe the student council. Made fun of all her lyrics. Tricked her into saying "yo" all the time when they were kids. Spied on her and Nodoka. Never learned to do her own homework.

And then dared — DARED — to say she pitied Mio.

The bassist's eyes were cold. "No," she said. "I'm not giving her a pass. Not again."

"Huh?"

"I'm sorry, Azusa. I'll play with Ritsu this time, but I can't promise anything more. She's gone too far."

"But she's your best friend."

"Well, that was a mistake! I should have chosen better! Why do you keep defending her, anyway?"

As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Mio regretted them — she had _asked_ Azusa to share her opinions. But the junior student didn't argue. Head low, she said, "I didn't mean to upset you."

"Wait, I —"

"No, you're right. Ritsu has done some things I would never defend. Whatever decision you make, I'll support you. I... I just think there's something important you shouldn't forget."

"All right. What is it?"

That funny look was in Azusa's eyes again as she began. "I was thinking about friendship myself just now. And I remembered a saying my dad told me once: 'Character is who you are when no one else is looking'. Senior, I guarantee you that when no one's looking, Ritsu is the same person as when she's with us.

"She lies sometimes, yeah. But it's usually for the sake of the club — and besides, she's _bad_ at it. She can't be anyone but herself. Her feelings are always out in the open."

"But I told you, I heard her blaming herself for everything. She never told me —"

"Maybe that was a surprise to her too. Sometimes stuff builds up in your head and you don't realize it. But you know what I mean, senior. When the rest of us get mad, we sometimes hold it in to keep from being rude. Ritsu doesn't do that. When _she's_ mad, we hear about it."

Mio frowned slightly. "I guess. But being frank doesn't make her a better person."

"No," Azusa agreed. "All it means is that she trusts us. The whole world, really, but us the most. For all the cynical things she says, Ritsu doesn't feel any actual need to guard herself. She knows we're on her side and she's on ours."

"And what if I don't want her on my side anymore?"

"All I'm saying is... don't take her for granted. This club has a long way to go and a lot to prove. We don't have so many people on our side that we can afford to lose one."

Mio sighed. "I don't know, Azusa. I'll keep thinking."

The junior student got up to go. "Good luck. I really hope you can work this out. It would be sad to see friends as close as you and Ritsu separate."

"Friendship is overrated," said Mio sulkily.

As Azusa walked away, she whispered to herself, "I wish I knew."

* * *

Matsuo saw Yui out the corner of his eye and immediately turned around. With a little luck, she might not have noticed him yet. He moved quickly, rounding as many corners as possible, and checking over his shoulder every few seconds to make sure she wasn't following.

After a couple of minutes, he stopped to catch his breath. By now he was confident that he'd lost Yui. He had wound up by the vending machines. Covering so much ground had tired him out; he decided to get a cold drink.

As he examined what the machines sold —

"That's it!" said Yui. "I know what to do now!"

Matsuo spun around. "Gah! How'd you know where I was going?"

"True love is like GPS! Beep beep!"

(Behind her, Ui mouthed the words 'She was thirsty.' Matsuo nodded.)

Yui once again pulled out her guitar. "I don't think I introduced you properly before. Giita, this is Matsuo! Matsuo, Giita! You'll be in-laws soon, so it's important to get along."

In-laws? No, before that... "What did you mean about knowing what to do?"

"I saw you choosing a drink. I should let you choose a song! Tell me your favourite and I'll play it flawlessly to prove my love!"

Matsuo was tempted. He didn't want to encourage Yui, but she _was_ awfully good... "Okay. Can you do 'Bohemian Rhapsody'?"

"Can I? _Can_ I?" She paused. "No. I don't know that one."

"Sure you do, Big Sister," said Ui. "It's the one that goes 'Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?' "

"Oh yeah!" Yui whipped her giita— er, guitar into playing position. "Here we go, Matsuo! Get ready to be crushed under my tidal waves of love!"

She began playing. And it was _amazing_.

For the first two lines, that is. Then she stopped playing; instead, she seemed to be concentrating intensely. After a few moments, Ui said, "Then it goes, 'Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality.' "

"Oh yeah!" Yui played those next two lines. And it was _amazing._ Then she stopped again.

" 'Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see.' "

"I thought I wasn't supposed to."

"No, those are the next lines."

"Oh!" Yui played them. And it was _amazing._

Matsuo sighed. "Look, this is silly. I have the lyrics in my bag. Wait here and I'll go get them."

"Great! Thanks!"

He walked away, but his conscience pricked him. He decided to hide around the corner and make sure Yui didn't just stand there waiting for —

"I don't think he's coming back," said Ui.

"Of course not," said Yui. "But didn't you notice that instead of just leaving, he made up a silly excuse? I'm wearing him down!"

Relieved, Matsuo completed his escape.

* * *

Ritsu had spent a productive morning fiddling with her drumsticks, looking at things, and fiddling with her drumsticks again. She looked forward to getting even more done after lunch.

"Hey! Ritsu!" The drummer turned to see Jun.

"That's _Senior_ to you," she chided. "What's up?"

"Have you seen Azusa?"

"Not if I saw her first."

Jun stared.

"Uh, not if... if she saw... never mind. I'll work on that one. Whyja ask?"

"I was with her earlier, but then I had to... do a thing. Now I can't find her anywhere."

"Maybe she's hiding."

Jun slapped her forehead. "Of course! We're _both_ hiding! No wonder I can't find her."

"Hidin' from what?"

"Nothing. No one. And definitely not because of industrial espionage."

Ritsu blinked. "You're in an industry?"

"Anyway, if you see Azusa, can you tell her I'm looking for her? I think she has my phone."

"Ha!" The drummer pointed at her. "How dumb can ya be?"

"Dumb?"

"She has your phone! Just _call_ her!"

"With what?"

There was a short pause.

"Are there any payphones here?" Ritsu asked.

"Are there any anywhere?"

Another pause. "I'd offer you mine, but I'm not going to."

"I understand. Classified equipment."

"Well... forget it. You'll find her eventually."

"Yeah, I guess." Jun glanced around. "Hey, weren't you with Mio?"

The drummer glowered. "For a while. Then I remembered she sucked at not sucking."

"Really? Mio? I've never thought she —"

"Well, she DOES. She sucks the suck. She's a prissy little pain in the rear who cares more about name tags than people. Did I mention the sucking? 'Cause that's how she spends, like, 94 percent of her time."

Jun took all that in, but then shook her head. "Come on, Ri— Senior. You're just saying that because you're mad."

"No, I'm mad because I have to say that," Ritsu contradicted. "Where'm I wrong, huh?"

"First of all, Mio isn't little."

"Oh, well..."

"She's huge."

"Okay."

"Just saying."

"You can stop now..."

"Out to HERE."

"All right already!"

Jun smiled. "And she doesn't suck. She's my idol! I'd give anything to have her skill, her looks, her personality..."

"Her _personality_?"

"Yeah, you know. I have to force myself to practice — I'd always rather just slack off. Mio's not like that. She studies and works and practices because she _wants_ to. It must be so much easier that way."

Ritsu frowned. She was tempted to tell Jun the truth — the side of Mio that only her best friend got to see. The fact was, Mio didn't have it all _that_ easy. She liked slacking off as much as anybody else.

What came naturally to her wasn't hard work, it was discipline and self-control. Maybe she'd been born with it; maybe her parents had taught it to her. Either way, Mio's sense of responsibility was ironclad. Given the choice, she would always choose work before play — but it wasn't what she actually _wanted_. Deep inside Boring Mio, Fun Mio was always screaming to get out.

Ritsu liked Fun Mio better. She pried her out of there whenever she got the chance. But that said... Boring Mio was sorta the reason Ritsu ever got anything done, wasn't she?

The drummer looked away. "Tell me something, squirt. Do you ever get really mad at Azusa?"

"Oh yeah, sure."

"I mean _really_ mad. Like, tie-her-up-in-her-stupid-pigtails, stuff-her-in-a-mailbox and ship-her-to-Zimbabwe-third-class mad."

Jun thought. "I dunno if we're _that_ close. We just met this year."

"You think you'd fight more if you were _closer_?"

"Well, yeah. You've gotta be close to use close-range weapons."

Ritsu instructed herself not, under any circumstances, to consider that a wise observation. This was _Jun_, for God's sake.

As if reading her thoughts, the bassist lit up. "Hey! Were you asking me for advice there?"

"What? Please. What kinda loser would take advice from a junior?"

"_You_ would! That's totally what you were after! Hey, want some more pearls of wisdom? Hmmm?"

Before Ritsu could react, there was a shout from across the room. "There!" someone yelled, pointing at Jun. "It's her!"

The bassist gulped. She spun on Ritsu, shouted "_You never saw me!_", and took off at top speed.

"'Course not," said the drummer with a smirk. "I saw you first."

* * *

Yui was standing on a table in the middle of the food court. With both hands (and still clearly straining), she held up a borrowed boom box. The speakers were blasting a vaguely familiar song.

_In your eyes... Oh, I want to be that complete... I want to touch the light, the heat I see in your eyes..._

Yui winked.

"No," said Matsuo.

* * *

Kawasumi came up next to where her student sat on the curb. "Hi," she said. "You, uh... don't look so good."

Tsumugi turned to her, and the teacher held back a gasp. She looked much worse than "not so good". She'd clearly been crying for hours; her eyes were bloodshot and her hair disheveled. She looked like the sun had gone out of her sky.

Kawasumi gulped. This might be more than she could handle. She'd never seen any student, much less _this_ student, in such a state. But she was committed now... she'd just have to try.

"Ms. Kawasumi," said Tsumugi. Without standing up, she made a sad little approximation of a bow. "Are you here to see our performance?"

_Oh, God forbid._ "Not exactly. Listen... why don't you tell me what's wrong?"

The blonde looked down. "I appreciate the offer, but I will have to decline. This is not something I can talk about."

"Are you sure? I promise it'll stay strictly between us."

"No. I... I can't."

_Plan B._ "Then let me take you to someone you _can_ talk to. It's no good just sitting here."

"I can't leave. Our stage time is —"

"Come on, Kotobuki. You're in no shape to play music right now. Your friends will understand." _Besides,_ thought Kawasumi, _who notices if the keyboard part is missing?_

"They would understand," she agreed, "but only if I gave them a reason. I don't want to lie. And this..."

"Well, you can figure it out later, but right now you need help. Why don't you let me drive you home?"

Tsumugi gave a short, bitter laugh. "I would be no better off there."

"Sure you would. Your parents —"

"_You don't understand._ Please leave me be."

Kawasumi paused for a moment, trying to think of something that would convince her. To her surprise, it was Tsumugi herself who broke the silence.

"I do want to talk to someone," she said quietly. "More than anything. And there is someone I usually confide in... but she looks up to me. I can't tell her this."

"And your parents?"

"They would be scandalized. Father would overreact — I don't know _what_ he might do. And Mother... she would never look at me the same way again."

Kawasumi's experience of parents made her doubt that... but then, with rich people, who knew? "What about —"

The blonde shook her head. "There is no one I can tell. Not Sumire. Not my parents. Not my friends. Certainly not a teacher. This... this is too much..."

The blonde drew deeper into her shell. Kawasumi could barely hear the last thing she said:

"I... I'm just so _ashamed_..."

Kawasumi tentatively put a hand on Tsumugi's shoulder. "Ashamed of what?"

Her voice was very quiet. "I lost myself in delusion. I tried to defy everything... my role, my parents' wishes, the whole life I've lived until this moment. And all for nothing. She didn't l— I was wrong."

"...I see." There were only a few ways that sentence might have ended, but Kawasumi vowed here and now to never wonder about it. If Tsumugi wanted to keep the details to herself, that was absolutely fine. Ideal, in fact.

But in that case... what now? The teacher looked down helplessly. This wasn't her job, dammit! She hadn't been a teenager in more than ten years. How in the world was she supposed to relate to...

Wait.

"Kotobuki," she said, "if you knew this thing you were doing was so outrageous, why did you do it anyway?"

"I had to. It was everything I wanted."

"But you knew it might not work out..."

She shook her head again. "I _knew_ that, but I didn't _believe_ it. I was absolutely certain this was meant to be. I could see my whole future ahead... all... all gone now..." She began sobbing quietly.

_I was wrong,_ thought the teacher. _This is one student I CAN relate to. Whether I like it or not._

Chika Kawasumi was a solitary, independent woman. She never got involved with others more than her job required. There was no one _she_ confided in, because she never needed to. This was the life she had chosen — the life she preferred.

But in her high school days...

"All right," she said, sitting down beside Tsumugi. "Listen up. I have a story to tell you."

* * *

**Next: Blow the Door Wide Open**

[A/N: Okay, I said I wouldn't change the count again. But then I discovered two things about part 9... first, I'd been working on it intermittently for nearly a year, and second, that was because it was _twice as long_ as any other chapter. Too damn much happens in this one. So I'm splitting Regionals one last time; the good news is I'm nearly done the other half. Stay tuned! (And check out the election one-shot I posted, if you missed that.) Oh yeah, Glee, never heard, you know the drill.]


	10. Light Up the World

Sawako wiped the sweat from her forehead. There! Three costumes complete. That just left...

Huh. Was it two or three? All of a sudden she couldn't remember how many junior students the club had. This had all been simpler last year, when everyone was in the same grade and had a unique instrument. (Cramming a year's worth of emotional turmoil into the last two days hadn't helped either.)

Right, there were two juniors now. Azusa and Jun. She would need most of the remaining time for Yui's costume, so those two would have to be quick. Fortunately, Sawako already had a pretty good idea how to handle Azusa. As for Jun... hmm... well, she'd just see what was left over.

She set to work on Yui's outfit with gusto. This was just what she needed right now — something to sink her teeth into. She didn't want to think about anything more serious than what kind of frills to use. This was simple. Distracting. Creative. So was it absolutely necessary that her phone be ringing?

Sawako sighed and popped it open. There was a longish text message from Megumi Yamasu, whom she vaguely recalled being friends with now. She read the message.

Huh.

Okay, she definitely wouldn't knock herself out making Jun's costume.

Sawako frowned; she shouldn't have needed to be told about this. It was one more reminder that she hadn't been doing her job this past month. Each club member had been struggling with something, but she'd been too focused on herself to see it.

Especially...

Well, no crying over spilled milk. She was _not_ going to let her girls down today. Back to work. The clock was ticking.

...Lord, she hoped Tsumugi was all right.

* * *

The curb was filthy. The air stank of tobacco. Beside her was what looked for all the world like a knocked-up teenager. At any other time, these would be circumstances that Ms. Kawasumi would try desperately to escape.

Now? Given the story she was about to tell, it all just felt... thematically appropriate.

"I come from a very religious family," she told Tsumugi. "We've been the caretakers of our town's temple for hundreds of years — as far back as the records go. I was raised to carry on that tradition. Whenever I wasn't at school, I was learning my shrine maiden duties.

"Now, every temple has traditions. How to communicate with the local gods. How to tell when they're discontent, and what to do about it. These days, most people don't really believe in all that. They'll visit a shrine out of habit on New Year's, and maybe once in a while when they want good luck with something. But when you grow up in a temple, you grow up believing.

"What's more, a temple as old as ours gets the _big_ legends. And when I was thirteen, I discovered the biggest one of all." She paused. "This is going to sound a bit crazy. Don't you dare laugh."

Tsumugi, absorbed in the story (as she never had been during class, Kawasumi noticed with annoyance), shook her head vigorously.

"Well... supposedly, once every hundred years, a monster would awaken and lay waste to the land. In order to stop it, a young priestess from our bloodline would perform a certain ceremony. The monster would be defeated... at the cost of her life.

"And the next time this was due to happen was my eighteenth birthday."

The blonde's eyes went wide.

"I'll never know what my parents thought about this legend. They had just died in an accident, and I came across it while studying to become the new head of the temple. I decided they must have kept it from me so it wouldn't cast a shadow over my life. But now I knew."

"Did you believe it?"

Kawasumi sighed. "Wouldn't you? Sure, I was shocked at first, but then I realized how special it made me! Everyone dies eventually, but not everyone gets to _save the world!_

"I could see my whole future ahead. In the next five years, I would do enough living for a whole lifetime. I would spend my inheritance like an heiress. I'd absorb as much education as possible. I'd be on every sports team. For five years, I would live the perfect life — and then I would die the perfect death."

"And... and what happened?"

The teacher glared. "Do you _remember_ there being a monster attack in south Honshu when you were in kindergarten?"

"Oh."

"I was ready. I had made my peace and left instructions for the next head of the temple. I waited patiently for the disaster to start... and it never did."

Tsumugi was silent. The teacher wasn't surprised; what do you say to a story like this?

"It took a few weeks for me to give up completely. When I finally did... well, I was furious. I tried to burn the damn temple down, and I couldn't even get _that_ right. I was so upset I didn't notice dark clouds gathering. My big revenge fire was rained out."

The blonde winced. "What happened then?"

"Well, obviously I couldn't stay on as temple head after all that. My cousin came to take over. And me... well, I took those hard-earned grades and went as far away as possible. I had no idea what I wanted — my big life plan stopped on that 18th birthday. All I knew was that I never wanted to see home again.

"At university I just sort of drifted, taking whatever courses I did well in. I wound up getting my degree in education just because that's the direction I drifted to. I might've gone on to grad school... but then I got the call. My cousin had been studying the temple rituals, and she felt I should know something. The prophecy I had read was never about me at all."

"What?"

"That business about a sacrifice every hundred years? That was how we _used_ to stop the monster — before my temple's god took up residence there. He was powerful enough to defeat it for good. The 'prophecy' was just a record of what he had done for us.

"My translation was wrong. I'd mixed up the tenses and moods. It was completely my mistake."

Tsumugi's eyes were full of sympathy. "Ms. Kawasumi..."

"_That_ was why my parents had never told me the hard truth — they weren't dumb enough to think it _was_ true. Maybe the monster had existed and maybe it hadn't, but either way, it was gone now. I would _never_ have to sacrifice myself fighting it. All thanks to a god whose shrine I had tried to destroy."

The blonde looked down.

"That was the end. As far as I was concerned, that whole part of my life no longer happened. I wouldn't give myself a chance to remember — I'd find a career and sink my teeth right into it. The most obvious thing to do with my degree was go into high school teaching, so I did. And that's where I've been ever since."

There was silence for a while. Eventually Tsumugi said, "Ms. Kawasumi, I appreciate your trusting me with all this, but..."

"But why?"

She nodded.

"To show you that life goes on. My big life plan ended, but it was all in my imagination anyway. I moved on."

"And are you happy?"

"I'm... content."

Tsumugi lowered her head between her knees. "That's more than I can ever hope for."

"What? No! I'm telling you —"

"Ms. Kawasumi, I'm glad you got over your pain, but mine is not the same. You were disappointed. My _heart is broken_. I found the person I was meant to be with... and I was rejected. There is nothing left for me."

Kawasumi sighed. _Teenagers._

"My life is over. I..."

She fell silent. "You what?" the teacher asked.

Tsumugi looked up, and all of a sudden there was hope in her eyes. "_My_ life is over," she repeated. "That's the answer. I need to do what you did!"

"Wh-what I did?"

"There's nothing left for me here, but I can start a whole new life somewhere else! It's my only chance to forget! I need to kill Tsumugi Kotobuki!"

Kawasumi's eyes widened with horror. "NO. No, no, no. Definitely not. You can't do that."

"Why not?"

"First of all, you couldn't just disappear. Half of Japan would be looking for you."

Tsumugi pondered. "If I lined my clothes with tin foil..."

"Second, imagine how much you would upset your family and friends. _I_ was an orphan, and anyway, I didn't just drop off the map — my cousin still knows how to reach me. _You_ have dozens of people who would miss you terribly."

The blonde looked down again. "Their love... I am grateful for it, but it can't compare to the one I've lost..."

"I understand the feeling, but are you really going to _tell_ them that? Because that's what it means when you disappear on somebody: 'Your pain is less important than mine.' "

Tsumugi looked away.

"And you also can't do this because..." The teacher sighed. "...Because I couldn't stand it."

"What?"

"It would be such a _waste_. You're a beautiful person, Tsumugi. You have so much optimism — so much to offer. I would hate to see someone like you give up and walk away."

"But... but I can't be that person anymore. It hurts so much..."

"Do you really think it would stop if you ran away?"

"Didn't it stop for you?"

"No. Not any faster than it would've otherwise. For months I snapped at people and lay awake nights. You can hide from the whole world, Tsumugi, but not from yourself."

The blonde's eyes were hollow with anguish. "Then there's _nothing_ I can do? I'm stuck with this pain forever?"

"Not forever. I don't know how long, but I promise you, _not_ forever."

There was a long silence. Tsumugi sat with her head low, and Ms. Kawasumi stayed beside her, hoping she had said at least some of the right things.

Finally, the student raised her head. "If it doesn't matter what I do," she said, "I suppose I will remain myself."

"Don't say that like it's a punishment," Kawasumi urged her. "Tsumugi Kotobuki is more than just a name. It's the person you've always chosen to be. It's the love of your friends and the pride of your parents. Don't let one disappointment put an end to all that."

Tsumugi looked up at her. "You felt this way once. If you could talk to your younger self, would you tell her what you're telling me?"

Kawasumi's answer would have been different a week ago. An _hour_ ago. Even now, the words were out of her mouth before she quite realized they were true.

"Yes," she said. "I was wrong to run away. I would tell myself exactly the same thing."

Apparently that was what Tsumugi had needed to hear. Slowly, she got to her feet. "Well, I... I should be going. I need to eat something before warmup time."

"Will you be all right?"

She nodded. "Thank you, Ms. Kawasumi. I feel..."

They both knew she couldn't finish the sentence. She didn't feel better. Not yet.

Kawasumi decided to break the tension. "You know, you have one reason to stay that I didn't have."

"What is it?"

"The _money_. You'd be running away from that too."

"My... my parents' wealth is no comfort right now."

"Oh? Well, if you're not using it, give it to me."

Tsumugi actually smiled at that. She made a bow and turned to go.

The teacher watched her carefully, just to be sure, as she walked away. To her great surprise, Tsumugi was still smiling. Had a little dry wit really amused her that much?

Then Kawasumi realized the truth. She wasn't smiling about that. She wasn't smiling at all.

She was putting her mask back on.

As the door closed, Kawasumi sighed deeply. She'd done the best she could. Tsumugi was out of immediate danger; now there would be time for Sawako to call her family. They were the best equipped to help, and anyway, this was their mess to handle.

The teacher leaned back; then, deciding to let fatigue outweigh good sense just this once, she lay right down on the cement. All her energy was gone. She had spent the last ten years avoiding... not _people_ as such, but connections. Human contact had been off her list of fun activities. After all this time, opening up to Tsumugi had been like suddenly hitting the gym after years on the couch.

She briefly considered lighting another cigarette, but that would have required getting up. So she just lay there pondering, with her confession echoing in her head. _The same thing. I would tell my younger self exactly the same thing._

_So what should I tell myself now?_

The sound of the door interrupted Kawasumi's thoughts. When she saw who was there, she jerked upright and brushed herself off, hoping to save a little dignity. "Megumi. Did you do what you needed to do?"

Yamasu wearily nodded and sat down next to her. "For whatever it was worth."

"We should get going, then. Unless..."

"Yes?"

"You didn't want to stay for their concert, did you?"

"_God_, no."

Kawasumi silently thanked any deities that might really exist. She noticed that Yamasu's head was lolling a bit. "You're not drunk again, are you?"

"Headache. _Massive_."

"Hang on, I have some aspirin." Extracting a bottle from her purse, she handed it to Yamasu — who poured out ten pills and swallowed them all.

"It's okay," she said, seeing Kawasumi's shocked expression. "They really lowball the safe dosage on these things."

"Even so, you realize you'd better not drink for about a week now, right?"

Yamasu's eyes were like dinner plates.

* * *

As a rule, each time Matsuo had escaped, it had taken Yui and Ui a bit longer to find him again. It came as a surprise to them both when he turned up in the main hall, clearly waiting for them.

"Darling!" shouted Yui, who rarely looked a gift horse in the mouth.

"Hi, Yui. Ui." He nodded to the two sisters.

"You aren't running! Are you finally ready to talk about us?"

"Yeah." He sighed. "Look, this has been an... interesting experience."

Yui frowned. "Are you doing that thing?"

"What thing?"

"I can't think of the word. Hang on." She whispered something to Ui, who whispered something back. "Letting me down easy! Are you doing that?"

He lowered his head. "Yes, I'm trying to."

"Stop it! Just go hide again, okay? We were having fun." Ui doubted that was the word Matsuo would choose, though the attention ought to be flattering at least.

"Yui, listen to me. It's not that I don't _like_ you. You seem like a really nice person..."

"Then what's the problem?"

"You're just... not my type."

Indignation flared in Yui's face. "Oh really? _Do you have something against the blind?_"

"Wh-what? No! I —"

"Because I'm not blind!" Yui whipped her dark glasses off. "See? Normal eyes! Your shirt is purple! How would I know that if I couldn't see, huh?"

Ui snatched the glasses and put them back on her sister. "Shh!"

"So there's no problem now, right?"

Matsuo facepalmed. "Yui, I knew you weren't blind. You _recognized_ me."

The guitarist blushed. "Oops. If anybody asks, that was sonar, okay?"

"Sure. I don't care about this... thing you're doing. It has nothing to do with us."

"So you admit there's an us!"

"No! By 'us' I meant the _absence_ of... I mean... oh, forget it. The point is we're not going to date."

Yui stood firm. "Is it because of the girl from before? 'Cause I can take her!"

"No, she's... I'm not with her anymore."

"Then we —"

"But I'm not looking for someone else," he hastened to add.

"Sometimes you find things you're not looking for! I never thought I'd become a guitar player, but it's the best thing that ever happened to me!"

"I'd just... rather be alone for a while."

"But _why?_" Yui grabbed his hands. "Why can't you at least give it a try?"

Matsuo pulled away. "I have a 'why' for you too. Why me?"

"Because I love —"

"Yeah, but _why?_ You just came at me out of nowhere! Why did you pick me?"

"Because we're... I mean, Romeo and... I, I didn't pick you! _Fate_ picked us both! It was love at first sight!"

In Ui's mind, everything suddenly made sense. It was as if she'd put on glasses and could finally see clearly.

She had been wondering for weeks why exactly her sister had fallen in love. She didn't doubt Yui's sincerity, and unlike her bandmates, she'd refused to write it off as some kind of random phase. It wasn't weird or incompatible with her personality. Ui had just wondered what had prompted it.

Now she understood. It was no accident that Yui kept bringing up _Romeo and Juliet_ and saying "against the odds". When she'd run into Matsuo, her rival guitarist, she'd been struck by the idea of a star-crossed romance... and that idea had so enthralled her that she had willed herself into love with him. There was nothing fake about how Yui felt. She was really in love — with the _idea_ of this boy.

And that wasn't fair to either of them. Matsuo was being harrassed, and Yui was building higher and higher hopes on an imaginary foundation. If she ever managed to wear Matsuo down and they started dating, she would probably find that they had nothing in common. The best thing for both of them would be if he rejected her, right now, too firmly for Yui to argue against.

But Ui could tell that he wasn't going to. He was too nice, too determined not to hurt Yui's feelings. He might take stronger measures, but not... unprompted...

_Can I really do that? Can I hurt Big Sister, even if it'll save her from greater pain?_

"— not your fault, but like I said, you're not my type."

"Then I can _change!_ I'll become your type! Tell me who you want me to be!"

_Yes, I can. I have to._

"Tall. I like tall girls. Six inches taller than you."

"Perfect! That's a start!" said Yui. "Let me write it down!"

As she dug in her pockets for a pen, Matsuo noticed Ui looking at him. Subtly and silently, the younger girl raised her hands to her face... and used her index fingers to mime angry eyebrows.

He looked at her doubtfully. With a heavy heart, she nodded.

Yui had now found a pen and was writing on her contest programme. "Buy... _all_... the platform shoes. Okay! What next?"

"Nothing," said Matsuo.

His voice was so different that Yui jerked her head up. "What?"

"I've been patient long enough. I don't want you. I'll _never_ want you. Get lost."

"But —"

"No buts! No discussion. Just beat it."

Tears were in Yui's eyes. "M-Matsuo..."

"Go away."

"I... I'm just..."

"Just annoying? Just crazy? Tell you what. If I ever need a stalker, I'll give you a call. Till then, go back to playing in the sandbox."

"I play in a _band_!" said Yui, anger flashing in her eyes.

"You play in a _girl_ band. That's like half a real one. I dunno where you got such a big-name guitar, but it's totally wasted on —"

Yui shoved him over so hard he saw stars.

"_Jerk!_" she shouted, and ran away crying. Ui hurried to follow, but before leaving, she gave Matsuo one last look. A look of sympathy, of gratitude... and of sorrow for all three of them.

* * *

_We should talk. About, y'know, stuff. Meet me in the main hall nowish. R._

Ritsu thought for a moment.

_PS: I'll be the one in the wheelchair._

Satisfied, she put her phone away. This wasn't going to be a lot of fun, but what choice did they have? The timing of this feud was just unworkable. They could go back to Defcon 5 tomorrow, but for now they had to drop to 3 or lower. (Or did Defcons work the other way?)

She surveyed the area carefully, watching for Mio. People sometimes called Ritsu inattentive, and whenever they did, she had a good laugh in her head. Little did they know that she was secretly a master of observation! Not the slightest detail escaped her keen eye. She would know Mio was here before Mio herse—

"BOO!"

Ritsu launched halfway out of her chair. "Who? Who's there?"

She turned around to see a grinning blonde behind her. "Oh, just you, Mugi. Don't do that, geez."

"The temptation was irresistible," she said. "How has your day been?"

"Great! Okay. Decent. Not good." She sighed. "Fought with Mio."

"Oh no!"

"We're gonna sort it out now, I hope. Lemme know if you see her."

They watched for Mio. After a minute or so, the drummer realized she hadn't held up her end of the greeting ritual. "How's _your_ day been, Mugi?"

"Wonderful. I am thoroughly enjoying the event."

She quirked an eyebrow. "You're _sure_."

"Why would I not be?"

"Because this morning you looked like a meltdown waitin' for a place to happen."

Tsumugi's smile didn't waver. "Where did you and Mio get that idea? I assure you, there's nothing wrong."

"C'mon, Mugi. We're your friends. Pretty good ones, we like to think..."

"The best!"

"Then give us a little credit, would ya? We've known you for a while now. We know a thing or two about how you're feelin'." Of course, Ritsu reflected, that was no figure of speech. They literally knew only one or two things. But with Tsumugi, even getting to that point felt like an achievement.

"I assure you, nothing is wrong," said the blonde. But her lips didn't quite close. After a long moment, she continued, "And if there _were_... I might be unable to discuss it."

Ritsu raised both eyebrows.

"No matter how much I wanted to tell you, or how sorry I was to make you worry... it might just be too painful to talk about. It wouldn't mean I didn't trust you. It might... it might just hurt too much."

The drummer smiled. "Gotcha. I'll remember that in case it ever comes up."

"Thank you." She smiled back. "Oh, look!"

Ritsu looked where she was pointing. Across the room, Yui was arguing loudly with a male student. "Oho!" she said. "That must be the famous rival guitar dude."

"She made him sound taller."

"Definitely got the looks, though. Good choice."

"Do you think so?"

"Well, yeah. Why, don't you?"

She shrugged. "I suppose."

Ritsu glared sidelong at Tsumugi. For the first time in a while, she felt a bit condescended to by her friend, even though she probably didn't mean it. _Gee, looks like Richie McMoneybags thinks she has higher standards than I do. Well la-dee-da._

A shout of "Jerk!" un-distracted Ritsu. She turned to see the boy knocked on his back and Yui running away... in tears.

"Oh no!" said Tsumugi.

Ritsu shook her head sadly. "Dangit, Yui, didn't I _tell_ you this would happen? This is what happens when you don't follow Ritsu's Rules of —"

"Not now," her friend whispered.

"Huh?"

"Please, Ricchan... don't make fun of love. Not today."

The drummer looked closely at her. "Okay. Fair enough."

There was a brief silence, during which the boy from Southwest Tokyo Academy struggled to his feet.

"Welp," said Ritsu, "we better get over there."

"To Yui, you mean?"

"To _him_. We'll see her later. Right now we got us a friend's honour to avenge!"

That seemed to please Tsumugi. "Would you like me to push you?"

"I am an independent woman, thank you very much."

"It would just be faster..."

"Velocity is the price of independence."

She began to roll toward the boy. Tsumugi followed, only to be stopped short by Ritsu's outstretched arm — there was a further development. Two more boys had joined him, wearing uniforms that matched his own.

They talked to him for a moment; he answered, gesturing in the direction Yui had gone. Further remarks were exchanged... and then the newcomers started laughing.

In a voice as cold as ice, Ritsu said, "Push me."

* * *

When Mio got Ritsu's text message, she was all the way on the other side of the convention centre. She sighed and headed for the main hall, frustrated about pretty much everything.

She had spent the afternoon pretending to see the sights. In reality, she had been making one last attempt to pull her fragmented lyrical ideas into a proper song. By distracting herself a bit, she had hoped to stir up the creative juices.

Alas, the plan had a fatal flaw: she was too distracted already. Her mind had just kept coming back to the whole mess with Ritsu. What was she supposed to do? Mio was sick and tired of tolerating dishonesty; she wasn't the one who had gone too far. But what was friendship worth if she could just walk away from it?

Had she come up with lyrics? Oh yes. In fact, she'd gotten some whole songs finished. Songs with titles like "I Hate My Stupid Best Friend" and "Your Friendship is a Poisonous Spider" and "What the Hell is Wrong With You, Ritsu?" (It was probably no coincidence that she'd written that last one right after breaking a nail.)

At last she reached the meeting place. _All right_, she thought. _Let's find "the one in the wheelchair"._

It didn't take long. In fact, even a genuinely blind Yui could have found her. She was laying into someone — shouting at a volume normally reserved for her little brother, and with a level of rage even _he_ had never provoked.

"— threw away something really special! She poured her heart out to you, and you just dumped it in the sink and asked for a refund!"

"It's not like that!" said her target, a boy from some other school.

"Oh, I'll just BET it's not! We saw you, scuzzwad! You were laughing at her with Moe and Shemp here!" She indicated the two other boys with him.

"I —"

"Denial denied!"

He shut up.

"Lemme tell you a little something about the girl you just pre-dumped. Yui Hirasawa, second year. Guitar genius, cake enthusiast, technically capable of singing, and above all, friend to all she surveys."

By now, Mio had put together what she'd just walked in on. _Poor Yui..._

"See, she's like a baby bird that just rolled out of the nest. Totally innocent and pure — nothing ever really hurt her before. She also can't fly and needs food all the time."

"Okay."

"We've always known something was gonna mess that up eventually. Life won't let you just be happy forever. We've been bracin' ourselves for the crash."

"Then —"

Ritsu lunged forward. "_But WOE BETIDE the fool who crashes her!_"

"H-hold it! Listen! No one was laughing at Yui!"

"For I will _strike down_ upon — wait, what?"

She backed off slightly and he stood up again, saying, "It's not like you think. You were too far away to hear us."

"We wouldn't laugh at a blind person," added the shorter of the boy's two friends. "That's cruel."

"I just couldn't be her boyfriend. I'm... not available right now. But I tried to turn her down without upsetting her. She wouldn't listen."

Ritsu admitted, "That does sound like Yui."

"There was no nice way to get her to understand. And by the way, I'm the one who got shoved over. _Twice._"

The drummer blushed slightly (as did Mio, still a ways behind her). "Well... we'll call it even, then. I guarantee you Yui's _feelin'_ shoved."

Tsumugi, ever the courteous one, made a bow. "We apologize for misunderstanding you."

"Forget it," said Yui's purported boyfriend. He began to turn away, but the drummer, still skeptical, caught his wrist.

"So tell us... what _were_ you guys laughing at?"

He looked to the side. "It doesn't ma—"

"Your band," said the taller boy, who had been smirking the whole time. "Your lazy slacker band."

All three girls' eyes widened with shock.

Looking awkward, the guitarist explained, "I told them what school Yui was from. Apparently you have a... reputation."

"For slacking," added the taller boy.

"You're _not helping_, Jirou."

Ritsu addressed the accuser directly. "What's your malfunction, pal?"

"You're the Sakuragaoka light music club, right? Everybody from your school talks about how pathetic you are. All the other clubs feel better because at least they're not you."

"You got something against the disabled?"

"No, it's about your behaviour. You've been a punchline for two years. They say you almost never perform, and when you do, your songs are these... puffy things that make no sense. There's one about what, a hole punch?"

"A _stapler!_"

"Apparently you never practice either," the shorter boy added. "You just drink tea all the time."

"Oh yeah? Who says?"

"You named your band after it."

There was a pause. "That's... sort of an ironic thing..."

"It's a stupid name for a stupid band," said Jirou, towering smugly over Ritsu. "Why are you even at Regionals? You're no good and you're too lazy to get better. We laughed at you because you're a _joke_."

Mio had never felt so small. She wanted to curl up and die. And if it was this bad for her, how much worse must Ritsu be feeling? She watched helplessly as her friend's head sank low...

...only to jerk back up again, startling Jirou. She grabbed his tie and yanked on it so hard his face came down to her level.

"Y'know something?" she asked. "I've been hearin' a lot lately about how lazy we are. From Sawa-chan, from Jun, from stupid Principal Whoosis... and _I am SICK of it_. Guess what? You're the first one I don't have to be nice to. You get yelled at."

"Ch-choki—"

"Aw, breathe through your ears! Here's the thing. To the untrained eye, sure, we're a slacker band. We don't spend a lotta time playing the same stuff over and over. We like our tea and sweets. Gee, it's almost like we're _young girls_ or something. But remember what they say about icebergs? It's all under the surface.

"Sure, I don't practice a lot — but it doesn't matter. The beat is _in me_. Never stops! Guys like you drum your fingers when you're bored; I do it to let the inside out for air. Practicing is just gilding the lily.

"Or take Yui. _Please._" (That was to Matsuo, with an eyeroll.) "She's a frickin' natural music genius. Probably doesn't even realize it. She's never as good when we force her to play, but leave her alone for a while and she'll Jimi up the place. Should we step on that just to silence you gossippy grannies?

"Or take Mugi. She doesn't need genius, 'cause she's got skill. I've never seen anyone who's just so _capable_. Everything she tries, she's good at. And the absolute best one of those skills is tea-making, so why shouldn't she use it?

"There's also a couple of junior students. Not important. But then we have Mio."

The bassist's heart skipped a beat.

"I could tell you about Mio for hours. I could write you a screenplay. By the end of it, you'd be afraid of her and in love with her and ashamed to show your face in the same room. But I don't have to tell you a thing. Know why?"

"Let g— OWWW! Wh-why?"

"Because in a coupla years, you're gonna be drinking Mio brand _fruit punch_. You'll see her face every time you pass a magazine stand. Mio's gonna be a star, 'cause she's one of the few people who actually deserve it. She devotes herself and works her butt off.

"The rest of us, maybe not. I dunno if I have the talent. I dunno if Yui and Mugi have the commitment. But Mio has it all. She writes, she plays, she sings, and man, have you seen her chest? Out to _here!_ The only thing holdin' her back is shyness, and she's got us to push her through that.

"You just watch, bozos. In five years, if you're not her biggest fans, it'll be because you got hit by a bus or something. Any questions?"

The shorter boy raised his hand. "Why a bus?"

"More momentum and greater chances of job-related stress."

"But all of us at once?"

"No. Same bus, different times."

"You sound like you know something we —"

"CAN THIS WAIT?" yelled Jirou, barely conscious from strangulation.

"Oh yeah." Ritsu released his tie. "Sorry about that."

He looked up at her. He couldn't speak yet, but his face said it all: _You are a complete psycho lunatic NUT._ He hightailed it to find a water fountain; his friends quickly followed.

"And _that_," said Ritsu to Tsumugi, "is how we're gonna handle bad reviewers when we're famous."

"I think there may be some laws against that," said Mio.

Ritsu looked behind her. "Hey! How many of my conversations are you gonna listen in on today?"

"Sorry. I didn't want to interrupt."

"Well, quit it. You're at an unfair advantage. I've got no peripheral vision in this thing." As she spoke, the drummer made a three-point turn with her wheelchair so she could face Mio.

"Ritsu... what you said..."

"You mean about Yui being a secret genius and you being super awesome and —"

"Yes."

"It's okay, Mio. You don't have to say it." Ritsu smirked. "_Total_ BS."

There was a sudden silence. The drummer braced herself, expecting to be punished for breaking the mood yet again. But Mio didn't move. Her face was a blank.

And then, without warning... she cracked up.

In no time Ritsu and Tsumugi were laughing too. The dark clouds of the last few hours had finally broken. All the drama, all the stress, all the anger fell away from them like heavy luggage after a long trip. Mio knew that, as usual, she ought to be annoyed with Ritsu... but she was just so _tired_ of it.

"BS or not," she said, catching her breath, "it... it meant a lot. Thank you."

"No problem. He was just one wet blanket too many, y'know? A camel can only carry so many haystacks or whatever."

"Haystacks?"

Tsumugi suggested, "The straw that broke the camel's back."

"Right," said Ritsu. "I figure that takes at least one haystack. Camels are tough."

Mio laughed again. One more thing her friend could always be counted on for — a good malapropism. "Well, I appreciate your defending our honour. Just try not to get arrested doing it."

"Look," said the drummer. "Confidentially between you and me, _maybe_ rumours don't come outta nowhere. Maybe, just maybe, there _is_ a certain laziness factor at work among us. Maybe it even has a specific source a lot of the time. A source who's not especially proud of it."

"Ritsu..."

"Hey, don't look at me. I meant Yui."

"Uh huh."

"Anyway, it's _possible_ that such a thing might be true. It might be something we should listen to from a teacher, or even a more responsible, not to say stuck-up, member."

Mio crossed her arms.

"Totally meant Azusa. The point is, I won't pretend the word 'lazy' is totally inapplicable to us. But y'know what? That's our business. Our problem. Guys like him?" She gestured where the boy had been. "I don't wanna hear _them_ say it."

Somewhere in the bassist's head, a connection was made.

"Also, maybe it's the chair talking, but his height was totally unaccepta— you okay?"

Mio had grabbed Ritsu's shoulder to steady herself. She felt dizzy. Everything was coming together in her mind faster than she could handle.

For a month, she'd been trying to write songs, and had only come up with bits and pieces. The frustrations of each day had given her plenty of material, but no common theme. There had to be _some_ way to put it all to use, but she'd never come up with it. And now, suddenly, there it was. It was as if her little snatches of lyrics were moons drifting around, and the planet they were meant to orbit had just now shown up.

"Write," Mio muttered.

"Huh?"

"Write! _I have to write!_" She took off at top speed.

Ritsu stared after her. Cocking her head at Tsumugi, she remarked, "Never a dull moment, huh?"

* * *

Warmup room C was usually empty for about ten minutes between one band clearing out and the next setting up. This time, however, it was occupied a little early... though not by the intended users.

"Okay," said the first journalism club member, drumming her fingers. "You were right. We didn't need to rush to get here."

The second club member just nodded.

Suddenly a short-haired girl burst through the door and slammed it behind her. "Safe!"

Someone knocked frantically. "It's me! Let me in!"

"Oh!" The short-haired girl opened the door for the briefest of instants to let her friend in. As soon as she was inside, they both leaned back against the door, holding it closed.

A moment later, the door shook as someone tried to force it open. "We know you're in there!"

"It's our practice time!" the second girl called back. "You can't come in!"

"Oh yeah, 'cause that stopped YOU!" The door shook again, harder, but with no more success. "Well, fine! You've gotta come outta there sometime! We can wait as long as it takes!"

"No we can't," said another, calmer voice. "We promised Riko we'd watch her play, remember? It's almost time."

The person outside the door swore. "_Must_ you always point these things out, Ayame?"

"Sorry."

"Fine. But you guys are only safe for now! We'll be back!"

A third voice added, "Good luck with your performance."

There was a loud slap. "We do NOT wish them luck!"

The noise faded. The two girls waited several seconds; then the short-haired one cracked the door open and took a quick peek. "All clear," she said. Her friend sighed with relief.

Then they seemed to notice each other for the first time. They both backed up a bit and stood straighter.

"Jun."

"Azusa."

"Where have you been?"

"On the lam. Fugitive from justice. You?"

"Same."

Jun raised a fist. "Solidarity. By the way, do you have my phone?"

"...Yeah. Yeah, you left it on the table." She handed it back.

"Thanks. I'll need this for my one phone call if we get caught."

There was an awkward silence.

"Guess we're here first."

Azusa leaned back on the wall. "Whatever."

The reporter cleared her throat.

Both musicians were startled; they hadn't noticed they had company. "Hi," said Jun. "Who're you?"

"We're with the journalism club," she replied, including her partner with a gesture. "We talked to your drummer earlier about an article and she told us to come here."

"Oo! Make us the main feature! We're way more interesting than Ri—"

Azusa cut her off. "Sounds great. What's the format?"

"Well, we'll just get you each to say a little about yourselves, and your president can tell us about the band as a whole. We'll take it from there."

"Okay. Uh, Jun, you go first." Azusa had to think.

_We can't do this without the gimmicks, can we? They're sure to ask about the visible stuff like Ritsu's chair._ She sighed. _I can't believe this. My first interview, and I'll have to lie... wait, no I won't! My gimmick works on the "draw your own conclusions" principle. I can just let them guess where I'm from._

"...and so I joined up. Not too many bands have two basses! Make a pun about that in the article! See, 'double bass'..."

"Thanks, we'll think that over." She glanced at her note-taking friend; they both shook their heads. "And you?" she asked Azusa.

"Oh, I'm from —"

Azusa froze. _Oh NO. I was thinking about my gimmick. Now I'm stuck!_

The reporter raised her eyebrows. "From...?"

"Uh..."

"Fuyuki Junior High," said Jun. "That's the middle school you went to, right?"

"Right! Thanks. It slipped my mind." Azusa couldn't believe it — she'd been saved by Jun's unawareness of gimmicks. Keeping the secret had finally been helpful.

"Okay. And what do you play?"

She continued the interview. As they spoke, a slumping Yui entered the room, supported by Ui. "Hey!" Jun greeted them. "What's the matter?"

Yui sulkily answered, "The world is over."

"Huh?"

"Win, lose, it doesn't matter. We all die alone."

Ui whispered to Jun, "She found that boy and he turned her down."

"Ohhh." She put a hand on Yui's shoulder. "Well, that's his loss! If I were a boy, I'd totally date you, senior!"

The note-taking girl started scribbling faster.

Yui looked Jun up and down. "Hmm."

"What?"

She shook her head. "No thanks. It's a little too easy to tell."

"I wasn't really offeri— heyyy! Whattaya mean just a _little_?"

Azusa's interview was nearly done. "Do you mind a personal question?" the reporter asked.

"Go ahead."

"It must be hard... you know, when you go out in public. How do you deal with it?"

Luckily, Azusa had an answer ready. "I try my best not to worry about what other people say."

She looked confused. "But doesn't it, you know... hurt?"

"Only if I let it. The important thing is to be true to myself."

For some reason, the reporter was staring at Azusa like her face had turned upside down.

"What?"

"Uh... nothing. Thanks for your time."

Azusa got up. "You're on deck!" said Jun to Yui, having just finished explaining who their guests were. Ui helped her sister over to the chair.

"Hi," said the reporter. "Nice to —"

"Nothing is nice," Yui interrupted.

The journalists exchanged a glance.

As the interview, such as it was, progressed, After-School Tea Time's drummer and pianist arrived, Tsumugi holding the door as Ritsu rolled through. "...some cool nicknames, that's what. Why go by our boring real names when I could be, like, Razrblayd and you could be Lady Spike?"

"That _does_ sound like fun! But do the names have to be weapons?"

"Nah, I guess we could be... um... huh. I'm not sure what else sounds cool."

"We could go by our initials."

"Oh yeah! Lots of rock stars use — hey, what's with the peanut gallery?"

"They're reporters," Azusa explained, tuning up her Mustang. "They're doing an article on us."

"I know _who_ they are. Already met 'em. But what are they doing in our top-secret pre-concert pow-wow?"

"You told us to come to the warmup room!" the reporter protested.

"_To_ the warmup room. Not all the way inside! You could be planning to sell our awesome musical secrets to the Soviets!"

Azusa did some figuring. It was 2010 now. So the Cold War had been over for... eighteen years? Nineteen? She'd have to look it up when she got home.

"We don't have any awesome musical secrets," said Yui.

"Yeah, but _they_ don't know —"

"Because nothing is awesome."

Ritsu facepalmed. "Do not tell me you've gone emo again."

"I have nothing to live for. Love is over."

"Well, now's not the time to be dead! We have to _play_, woman! Get over here."

"Why?"

"So I can drum you back to your senses."

She thought. "I'm too depressed to move."

"Then wise up on yer own, dangit! Do you ever see me moping because some dweeb won't date me?"

"That's different, Ricchan. I thought I really had a _chance_."

Ritsu reacted almost exactly as if she'd been Tasered.

"Uh, okay, I think we're done," the reporter told Yui.

"That's good," she said, sniffling. "I need to be with my dearest Giita. Only he can soothe the pain."

She headed for the music stands. Confused, the reporter asked Ui, "Didn't she say she was leaving? Who's this Giita guy?"

"In the case," Ui replied quickly, scurrying over to bring Yui her instrument.

The reporter raised an eyebrow. She muttered to her colleague, "I would _not_ have expected a girl like that to have a backup boyfriend just in case."

Ritsu came over to do her part of the article. "Hi again," said the reporter. "Kinu, right?"

"Oh, ignore the name tag. It's a misprint. You can call me Poisonette!"

She raised an eyebrow.

"Wouldja believe Queen Lasersnake?"

The other one went up.

"Okay, _technically_ it's Ritsu Tainaka. But I _go_ by..."

Azusa decided this was a good time to stop listening. (Actually, she decided 25 seconds ago would have been a good time, but better late than never.) She concentrated on tuning her guitar. Let's see... low E was a little flat, as usual... why _did_ she always seem to be a little flat, anyway?

Heh, good thing she hadn't said that out loud. She knew exactly what Jun would answer.

Jun.

The guitarist sighed; maybe she should've kept listening to Ritsu after all. At least it had taken Azusa's mind off her "friend".

She just couldn't understand it. Azusa had expected some kind of prank when Jun had first joined, but it had never materialized. After last night's practice, when Jun had helped the whole band get their act together, Azusa had finally lowered her guard. And now _this?_

Judging by the messages she'd read, Jun was dead serious. She didn't want to mess with the club, she wanted to _ruin_ it — and that had been her goal all along. What had Azusa done to deserve this? Hadn't she been a good friend to Jun? Why was that less important than some stupid club rivalry?

Her thoughtful silence didn't go unnoticed. "You okay?" Jun asked.

"...Fine. Just worried that Mio isn't here yet."

"That's win-win! If she gets here, great. And if not, _I'm_ the main bassist!"

"Okay, now I'm really worried."

Jun stuck her tongue out. Just for a second, a smile snuck onto Azusa's face... but she caught herself and turned away. It was fake. It was all fake.

Her eyes fell on Ritsu, who was still taking the reporter for a ride. She remembered her conversation with Mio earlier. _Maybe it's better that Jun did this now, before we were really good friends. Just look at Ritsu and Mio... close enough to start a war._

_Of course, they're on the same side. God only knows what they're fighting f—_

Azusa shook her head violently. "Dammit, I'm NOT doing a solo!"

"Huh?"

"Nothi—"

There was a knock at the door. "Hey! Someone open up!"

"It's unlocked," Ritsu called out.

"I have no hands!"

Ui went over and opened the door. It was Sawako, carrying two overstuffed bags. "Wait till you see what I've got here, ladies!"

Noticing the slight disappointment on her interviewer's face, Ritsu smirked. "Thought this one might literally be a double amputee, huh?" The reporter pretended not to hear her.

Everyone else had now gathered around Sawako. "Oo!" said Jun. "What's in the bags?"

"Help me unload them and —" Sawako paused, noticing who'd spoken to her. "Jun."

"Yeah?"

"Glad you could make it. Okay, girls, let's hurry! You don't have long to change!"

At the sound of "change", all but the newest member showed signs of Gulf War syndrome.

"Come on!" Sawako began unpacking the costumes.

Now Jun understood. "We're dressing up for this? Why? Aren't we supposed to be representing our school?"

"Sure — with style!" Honestly, Sawako could take or leave the school, but she'd decided to stop saying those things out loud.

"Alice in Wonderland!" said Tsumugi suddenly. The others looked, and she was right — that was definitely the theme for the costumes.

"Wow, Sawa-chan!" said Yui. "These costumes — uh, _sound_ great." Ui patted her sister on the head. This was the first time all day she'd actually caught herself.

Ritsu, sighing with resignation, reached for her left cast — and froze. That wasn't an option this time. She would have to get help changing, like a real disabled person... unless...

She turned to Jun. "Hey squirt, can you escort this coupla Lois Lanes to the exit? Changing clothes is private band time, thankyouverymuch."

"But we haven't talked to everyone yet," the interviewer protested.

"You can come visit Mio and Mugi at our school. Or just skip 'em, they're pretty one-note."

"But this article is for tomorrow's issue!"

"I'll give you my digits." Ritsu beckoned to the girl with the clipboard, who handed it to the drummer to write on. "Hit me up this evening and I'll put the other two on the phone. Now shoo!"

As Jun came over to walk them out, Ritsu tugged her arm. "Follow them for at least five minutes."

"What? Why?"

"To make sure they don't double back on us like the back-doublers they are. Five minutes. There's a $25 fee if you come back sooner."

"Hey! You can't just fine me!"

"Sure can. It's all in the club constitution — shoulda read it before signin'. Now scoot!"

The junior member hurried after the two guests. As soon as they were through the door, Ritsu started detaching her casts. Azusa brought her costume to her, having quickly understood what the club president was up to. "Here."

Ritsu nodded appreciatively. "Thanks."

"You know, Mio's having a pretty stressful day. Are you sure she'll be up to doing a phone interview later?"

"No. I am, however, sure I can do her voice."

Azusa rolled her eyes and went back to the costumes. Yui and Tsumugi were already changing into theirs, which left three unclaimed. "Which one's mine?" she asked.

Sawako pointed at a bunny-girl outfit.

After a long pause, Azusa said, "Seriously though, which one?"

"I know, I know. Sorry. I only had time to do four original costumes, so they went to the senior members. You'll just have to be the White Rabbit."

"That... even if it weren't so embarrassing, it contradicts my gimmick!"

"No, it _highlights_ it. Now come on, get dressed. I bet it's a good look for you."

Why did everyone want to stick animal ears on her? In fact — "Wait a minute. There's a perfectly good cat in the book!"

" 'Cheshire' isn't quite as easy to indicate as 'White'. Unless you know how to make yourself disappear."

Every day, Azusa was a little more tempted.

The next few minutes passed in silence: all the students were changing at top speed as their teacher went back and forth making small adjustments. By the time Jun finally returned, Ritsu had long since been ready. She checked her watch. "That was... eight minutes twenty. You pass."

"I stayed extra, so now you owe ME money, right?"

"We'll discuss how wrong you are about that after you suit up."

"Right." She headed for Sawako. "Which one?"

"This one here." The teacher was still looking at Jun strangely, the way she might look at a cake that came out of the oven still liquid.

Jun examined the costume. Unlike the others, it was clearly a _male_ outfit, resembling an out-of-date business suit. The primary feature was a huge top hat with a tag on it that read "In this style 10/6".

"Huh," said Jun. "What am I?"

"The dormouse," said Sawako.

Jun raised an eyebrow. She gave Azusa a questioning look... and on any other day, the guitarist would have taken pity, but not today. She pretended not to notice. (Ui, having followed all this, made a mental note to explain the truth to Jun later.)

Yui was now fully dressed. She struck a pose. "How do I look?"

"Sharp," said Ritsu. "How 'bout me — uh, Mugi?" Mentally, she half-kicked herself for nearly forgetting Yui's gimmick.

"One sec," Sawako answered for Tsumugi, whose hair she was busy arranging. This was no ordinary hairstyle — her gorgeous blonde locks, so rare in Japan, demanded special treatment. No costumer could have passed up the chance to work with them, and Sawako was no exception.

_So here I am, singling Tsumugi out again,_ she reflected. _One more little bonding experience. One more random tug on her strings, without any thought of what she —_

Sawako shook her head firmly. _Not now. Get the job done first. Hate yourself later._

She finished putting the hairdo together and spun Tsumugi around to face the others. "Okay! How about _this?_"

For a few seconds, no one could answer — their breath had been taken away. Tsumugi was an absolute vision. Her hair was done up in an elegant ball; her long dress had a keyboard-like pattern which by all rights should've looked tacky, but somehow worked perfectly. She looked like she'd stepped right out of a 1950s ballroom dance.

"I trust we're all invited to Breakfast At Tsumugi's," Ritsu said.

The rich girl was startled. "Do you want to come for breakfast? I'm sure that can be —"

"No no, just a joke." She paused. "But now that the subject's come up..."

"Ritsu!" Azusa scolded since Mio wasn't there to do it.

"Yeah, yeah. Never mind, Mugi. And also never mind the following: I like my eggs scrambled."

Yui would normally have been all over this discussion, but she was too busy styling and profiling. "This is great, Sawa-chan! I can't believe I get to be Alice!"

"You are?" asked Jun, now all hatted up. "I thought the other one was the Alice costume. You know, the one for Mio."

"No way. Gotta be Mugi," said Ritsu. "Right, Sawa-chan?"

"You're being too literal," the teacher replied. "Alice in Wonderland is just the _theme_ for these outfits. The band as a whole is Alice."

"Ahem," said Azusa.

"Except the juniors. A little variety never hurts."

Yui was crestfallen. "I want to be Alice! How can we _all_ be when there's only one of her?"

"If it helps, just think of yourselves as different aspects of the character. Ritsu, for example, is her tomboy side."

"HEY!"

Azusa snickered. "It _would_ explain the pants."

"_HEY!_"

"She's right," said Sawako. "Victorian girls never wore pants. They also weren't supposed to go chasing rabbits alone and exploring secret fairy worlds. ...Probably."

"_Probably?_"

"Well, I doubt it came up much."

"You are pulling every single word of this directly out of your rear end!"

"Am I?"

"Yes! Directly! No stops in between!"

"_Am_ I?" Sawako repeated, this time staring pointedly at Ritsu's casts.

"Ye—" The drummer stopped, suddenly getting the point. _Of course. A skirt wouldn't have worked with my gimmick._ "Well, whatever. I can take one for the team."

"Glad to —"

"_But_ I want the record to show that my acceptance of this costume in no way indicates agreement with the idea that I'm the natural one of us to play a tomboy."

Azusa snickered again. Without turning, Ritsu told her, "Yui is a dude-level slacker, Mio has humongous man hands, _you_ would explode on contact with the word 'ladylike', and we're all in a friggin' rock band. There is tomboy to go around." The snickering stopped.

"All right then," said Sawako. "Are you all comfortable with your costumes now? There won't be a battle to the death over who gets to be Alice?"

"We're good," said Ritsu. Yui nodded, still a bit disappointed.

"Okay." Sawako let out a long sigh; it was time to ask. "We have eight minutes to curtain. What are the chances that Mio is coming?"

Ritsu and Tsumugi shared a look, each hoping the other had greater confidence. "Not terrific," the drummer told Sawako. "I was sure we had things sorted out, but at this point..."

"What had to be sorted out?"

"Minor interpersonal apocalypse. I'll fill you in later. But we made up." Sawako smiled. _A war declared, fought, and ended in four hours. Ah, to be young._

"Mio ran off suddenly after that," added Tsumugi. "She said she had to write."

"Yeah, but she won't get much written," said Ritsu.

"Why not?" Azusa asked.

With a flourish, the drummer produced something hidden in her left cast. "Because _I have her pen_."

There was a shocked silence.

"Wait," said Azusa. "Why would you —"

"I didn't. This is mine. Had you going, though."

"Will I ever understand why you do these things, senior?"

"Of course. Everybody grows up sometime."

Sawako pondered. "Without Mio, some of the songs lose a lot. We may need to swap. What were you planning to play?"

" 'Fluffy' and 'Stapler'," Ritsu said.

The teacher blinked. "Those are _your_ songs."

"Yeah. You bugged out, remember? We decided to switch back to our own stuff."

Sawako dropped her head into her hands. "You... stupid... kids."

"Aw, c'mon. That P-Muddle music was —"

"That's not the POINT! It never was! Ritsu, what's Mio's biggest problem?"

Something told Ritsu not to make any of the dozens of joke replies that sprang to mind. "Her stage fright."

"Right. The rest of you are okay on stage but need to be forced to practice. Mio's the opposite. She works hard on her own, but it's all for nothing if we can't get her up there. And this is her first time playing for adults — being _judged_. Our only hope was to reduce the pressure."

"But Yui's on vocals —"

"Unless she forgets them like she always does! But don't you get it, Ritsu? We couldn't save Mio from being judged or covering for Yui, but we could at least _play someone else's songs!_"

The drummer's heart dropped like a rock. Of _course_. How had she failed to think of that? All of "their" lyrics were really Mio's, and she was terribly sensitive about them. She was nowhere near ready to put them up for professional evaluation.

Azusa began, "W-we were just..."

"Mad at me. I know. So you rejected a plan you didn't understand. I'm _good_ at this, Azusa! I have ten reasons for everything I tell you to do. But there's no point in arguing now... what you play doesn't matter anymore. Mio's gone."

There was only one thing Ritsu could say, and she wasn't too proud to say it.

"It was Jun's idea."

The teacher's head turned slowly. "_Was_ it now."

Panic gripped Jun. "Wait! I didn't mean to —"

"Actions speak louder than words, Suzuki. But I'm impressed. That was a pretty subtle maneuver."

"No! NO! I didn't — I mean, I did, but that wasn't the reason! I just... don't like P-Model!"

"Why so modest? Give yourself a pat on the back. Our best player is huddled in a corner somewhere, crippled with fear. Mission accomplished."

Tears flew from Jun's eyes. "This was never what I wanted! Not _really!_ I... I..."

"...Thought you could cut us without drawing blood," said Azusa quietly.

The bassist spun, and saw that her friend knew. Azusa didn't look angry, but there was no sympathy or understanding in those eyes. There was nothing.

"Azusa... I..."

She turned away. "Do what you came here to do."

Jun felt like she was going to die. The despair was like a physical force inside her head, pressing inward, crushing everything. She had written the script for this moment weeks ago. How had it all turned out so wrong?

All wrong all wrong all wrong _all wrong_ —

"SCREW IT! SO LONG, SUCKERS!"

Jun hurled her hat to the floor and ran out the door. She could hardly see through her tears.

A heavy silence fell. Azusa had no idea what to say. Should she apologize? It wasn't like she'd seen this comi—

"Two fifty-three," said Ritsu, looking at her watch. "Ends in 3. Who had that digit?"

"I did!" said Tsumugi, sounding genuinely pleased for the first time in a while.

"Geez, Mugi, you always gotta win at _everything_?"

Azusa blinked. So did Sawako.

"I'll have to pay later," said Yui. "I don't have that five bucks I thought I had."

"Yeah, no time now anyway. We'll settle accounts after —"

"You KNEW?" shouted Azusa.

Now it was Ritsu's turn to blink. "You _didn't_ know?"

"Here I was going crazy over Jun, and you were _gambling_ on her? How long did —"

Sawako interrupted. "Sorry, Azusa, you'll have to hash this out afterward. Time is almost up."

"And still no Mio," said Ritsu. She'd been so sure...

"That was always a possibility. I don't like it any more than you do, but I _did_ plan for it."

"Really?"

The teacher nodded. "You'll just have to —"

"Play the dinosaur song."

Everyone turned. Jun had left the door open on her way out — and Mio had just come through it.

"You made it!" said Yui with delight.

"Knew it! High five!" To Ritsu's amazement, Mio actually returned it, though her stern expression didn't change.

Sawako checked her watch — time was almost up. "Change her!" she ordered. "Everyone help get her dressed!"

The mobile club members got to work on Mio, who, incredibly, didn't resist. Ritsu wasn't sure if her friend actually accepted the situation or if she simply wasn't processing it. "The dinosaur song," she repeated. "You need to play it."

"Do I sing?"

"NO!"

The drummer couldn't help being a bit miffed at the force of that reaction. "So who does sing?"

"I do."

Eyebrows went up all around the room. Mio was going to sing by _choice_?

A volunteer poked her head through the stage door. "Ryuumei Academy, right? The drums and keyboard are set up for you. Come on through. Curtain in one minute!"

"Sawa-chan, hurry up and get a seat," said Mio. "I want you to hear this."

"Huh? Oh, right," she said, remembering that she was supposed to be in the audience area. She addressed the group as a whole. "Girls, you can do this. I believe in you. See you out there!"

She hurried through the other door. Ui gave her sister a good-luck hug and followed.

The band, now as prepared as they would ever be, proceeded to the stage where the larger instruments awaited. (Ritsu rolled her eyes to see a chair in front of the drums; Tsumugi moved it for her.)

"Glasses, senior," said Azusa to Yui.

"I have them!"

"Oh. So you do. Good."

Mio put hers on too, to Ritsu's alarm. "You okay with wearin' those?"

She didn't answer. Ritsu could tell it wasn't a matter of rudeness — it was absolute focus. She'd never seen Mio so psyched-up before.

"We set?" Ritsu asked the others. Everyone nodded with varying degrees of honesty.

If they'd sat down to think about it, none of them would have been in any shape to play. Azusa had just been betrayed by a friend. Yui had been rejected in love. Tsumugi had been ready to leave the country an hour ago. Even Ritsu had spent the day on an emotional roller coaster.

But Mio was back. Against all odds, the five of them were here, together. And that made all the difference.

In the darkness, Yui and Azusa shifted slightly, making sure their guitar straps were positioned right. Tsumugi boosted her confidence with a "we can do it" gesture.

Ritsu could just barely hear Mio say to herself, "This is MY solo."

And the curtain started to rise.

* * *

Jun was still sobbing as she ran out the front door. She stopped at the steps, suddenly realizing she had no idea where she was going. What was she supposed to do now? Her parents wouldn't be here to pick her up for over an hour. If she called them now, what would she tell them?

She didn't want them to know what she'd done. She didn't want anyone to know.

Why had she expected otherwise? What part of this could she ever have been proud of?

"Thought I might find you here about now."

She looked up to see Ms. Yamasu. "H-hi."

"Hi. Nice suit."

"You were right," said Jun, struggling to get her tears under control. "It wasn't what I wanted. I mean, not the _way_ it happened..."

"Come on, Jun. I'll give you a ride home."

Unable to stand up any longer, she fell against Yamasu. The teacher put an arm around her student; she could let it go, just this once. It was rough being young.

As they slowly went down the steps, Jun noticed that the vehicle waiting for them was a taxi. "Don't you have a car, Ms. Yamasu?"

"Nope. It's rarely safe for me to drive."

* * *

Sawako made it to the audience area just in time. She quickly found the volunteer who had given the one-minute warning and explained the "mixup" about their school; the volunteer jotted down the right information and went to tell the emcee. Relieved, Sawako found a seat in the front row, which was reserved for teachers and —

"Hello, Sawako."

— and staff. "Principal Yamada. Glad you could make it."

"Same to you. I was worried by your sudden absence yesterday. Did the appendectomy go well?"

"Uh, yes." So much for the mystery of what she'd told the secretary.

"And now the moment of truth is upon us. I look forward to seeing your students' progress."

"You'll be amazed, sir. They're a whole new band."

"I hope so. Their competitors have made strong performances."

The _competitors!_ It came to Sawako like a flash of lightning. She'd been a fool. She'd spent a whole month trying to bring her own club up to snuff when she should have been _sabotaging the competition!_ THAT was the way to win, not —

She shook her head. She wasn't going to be that person anymore. Well, not as much.

"Next up: The Sakuragaoka High School Light Music Club!"

The curtain lifted. Sawako held her breath. Her part was over, for better or worse. All she could do now was trust in her students.

And if the look on Mio's face had been any indication, they wouldn't disa—

_**kssh kssh BAdadum BAdadum**_

**"Don't you dare call me lazy!  
You know I'm really crazy!  
When swans go gliding by,  
They're kicking really hard just below the water's surface!"**

Sawako grinned. So _this_ was Mio's big point.

**"I've got to trust my instincts,  
No matter what the world brings!  
I know my future's bright...  
So if I take a break, is it really such a problem?"**

Sawako couldn't quite believe what she was seeing. There was no sign of the girl's usual trepidation. She'd been exaggerating when she promised Principal Yamada a whole new band... but this was _definitely_ a whole new Mio.

**"My eyes are peeled, I see my target up ahead there  
I'll mark it down and make a map so I can get there  
There's nothing wrong with taking shortcuts if you need to  
Or better yet, just find some wings and fly like birds do"**

By now the crowd was starting to notice the details. There were hushed whispers all over the room, mostly about Ritsu's chair, Azusa's origins, and Tsumugi's dimensions. Yui was getting a bit less attention, but that was unavoidable — the glasses and cane together would have made it easy to tell, but she needed both hands to play. The cane was on her back instead, held in place by Giita's strap. (To make up for this, Sawako had supplied a special cane for Yui's costume that was more eye-catching, a dark red one with full U-shaped handle — in fact, it was basically a vaudeville cane. Not much therapeutic value, but it wasn't like Yui actually needed the thing anyway.)

And as for Mio, well...

**"I broke a nail! Whatever — I'll glue it back together.  
And just like that, I feel like I've done something right.  
In little things and big ones, you've gotta give yourself love,  
'Cause if you don't, how can you ever love another person?"**

Sawako had made plans upon plans for this day, but somehow Mio had still managed to surprise her. She'd been expecting one of two possibilities: total panic and controlled panic. They might not get Mio on stage at all, and if they did, it would be with great reluctance on her part. She would be timid up there. She'd shrink back, make herself small, probably try to hide behind Yui and Azusa.

That timidity was the real reason why Mio had refused any showy gimmicks — and why the one she had would work perfectly. What was a shy girl without her glasses? Sawako was no psychologist, but she was sure there was a subconscious level to it, something about putting a wall between yourself and the world. That was certainly what _her_ glasses were meant to accomplish (albeit for a rather different reason).

This gimmick should have made Mio picture-perfect. It _would_ have on any other day. But today...

**"Don't you dare call me lazy!  
You know I'm really crazy!  
When hawks go flying by,  
They keep their talons back so that nobody can see them!  
I try to keep my hopes high,  
But life's a real bitch sometimes.  
I'm not full-grown just yet...  
So if I'm out of pitch, is it really such a problem?"**

Sawako didn't know how exactly, but today, Mio had gone straight from in tears to on a tear. She had found her inner Catherine — the fearless take-no-crap girl rocker inside. (Way inside.) And the thing about fearless take-no-crap girl rockers was that they _never_ wore glasses. It didn't matter if they were half blind — stuff could get out of _their_ way.

**"Look in my eyes, and you won't see what's in my heart there  
Make no mistake, my motivation's off the chart there  
My dreams are big, I give 'em all that I have inside  
But I can't dream unless I get some sleep, now can I?"**

Instead of a seamless part of the picture, Mio's glasses had become weird and jarring, like a cowboy hat on a samurai. It didn't make sense. It was a _mystery_.

Was "mysterious" a good gimmick? Sawako didn't really care. Her girls' happiness was all that mattered.

Well, that and getting attention, which this did. And Mio being on her game, which this entailed. And _keeping her job_, which this just might make possible. And prize money! She hadn't even checked if there was any!

**"I get a little thinner, then have too much at dinner  
And just like that, I feel like I've screwed up again.  
Sometimes my goals are too high — I'll find some I can live by.  
'Cause if I don't, how will I dance my way through all my troubles?"**

By this point, Sawako would usually be shifting in her seat a bit. There was a reason Ritsu's song had only been a backup plan. It was a classic drummer composition — loud and catchy as anything, but not really varied enough for a whole song. The chord progression was pretty much the same throughout. It needed an extra bridge or a solo or something.

This time, however, the song had her undivided attention — and she wasn't alone. The audience was eating this up. Even Principal Yamada looked impressed. Was it Sawako's imagination, or was he nodding ever-so-slightly on the beats?

**"Don't you dare call me lazy!  
You know I'm really crazy!  
When peacocks strut along,  
They wait until the right time to show off all their feathers!  
I want to be a beauty,  
So losing weight's my duty!  
But pressure's all around...  
So if I bend a bit, is it really such a problem?"**

Mio's personal hangups were really showing through, but still, these were definitely her best lyrics yet. Where Ritsu needed to learn to vary more, Mio knew _not_ to vary too much. Each chorus and verse was different, but shared a common structure with the others. Best of all, this song wasn't about her damn school supplies.

**"Is that a Red Point here now? No, wait, I'm in the clear now.  
And just like that, I feel like I'm invincible!  
Put on rose-coloured glasses, forgive your own trespasses...  
'Cause if you don't, how can you face the world with arms wide open?"**

The audience was still loving this. Sawako, who knew the music and could thus concentrate on the words, was the only one scratching her head. What the heck was a Red Point? She'd have to ask Mio later.

The tension was now building. Ritsu's drums were getting louder. Yui was hamming it up, with Azusa keeping a steady guitar line underneath. Tsumugi was getting sounds out of her keyboard that Sawako had never heard. This next chorus was definitely going to be the grand finale.

**"Don't you DARE call me lazy!  
You know I'm really crazy!  
When swans go gliding by,  
They're kicking really hard just below the water's surface!  
I'll always trust my instincts,  
I'll take the crap the world brings!  
I know my future's bright...  
So if I take a break, what the hell is such a problem?"**

Mio let go of her bass, gasping for breath, as the others played the outro. Ritsu hit the final double-beat triumphantly — and the audience was on its feet before she'd even silenced her cymbal. Sawako joined in the applause wholeheartedly, beaming with pride.

She could see by the looks on her students' faces how excited they were to get a standing ovation. They must be thinking they'd won for sure — blown the competition away. Sawako knew better. This wasn't a response to the quality of the performance, but to the _energy_ of it. The band had played and sung with incredible passion, elevating an already catchy song to Top-40 level. They'd taken everyone in the room down the rabbit hole with them.

Sawako couldn't have been happier for her girls. She was glad they didn't have the perspective she had. This was the best they'd ever played, but it wasn't good enough.

Regionals was more than some local "battle of the bands". It was the first step on the way to national and even global competitions. There were kids here who had been born with guitars in their hands, kids who put music before school or friends or anything else. That was the _expectation_ at this level. Sawako had needed to see for herself to realize the truth: her club had never, ever had a chance.

And she was so damn proud of them for trying anyway that she could hardly stand it.

The audience finally took their seats. "Thank you!" Mio called out. "We are After-School... uh..."

The bassist went quiet, and it suddenly hit Sawako that this was her first time on a proper stage. The stage lights were bright so the crowd could see the band. But the band couldn't see the crowd... at least, not until their eyes had a few minutes to adjust, and they weren't too busy playing to notice —

"AAAAAAAA!"

Mio passed out. She hit the floor like a rock. Azusa and Yui rushed to her side.

There was a hush as the audience looked on in horror.

"That's our show, folks!" said Ritsu. "Thanks for coming! Hey, anybody know CPR?"

* * *

**Next/Final: Get It Right**

[A/N: Finally! This damn concert has been looming over my head for a year and a half. The results will be in next time, and there are a few secrets still to be revealed, so don't miss it. I am entirely unaware of Glee, P-Model, Red Points, the video game _Catherine_, or how close one has to be to start a war.]


	11. What I Did For Love

"Our next category is high school pop and rock music clubs. This year, third place goes to... Yokozuna High!"

Sawako watched the club members take the stage to get their third-place trophy. They were over the moon, and they had a right to be. This category was one of the most crowded at Regionals - finishing third out of 15 schools was something to be proud of.

She sighed. Her club had things to be proud of, but this wasn't going to be one of them. Their moment of triumph had come and gone. Now it was time for the reckoning.

"In second place... Astraea Academy!"

Mio was okay. The rest of the band had brought her back around without too much trouble. Physically, she was none the worse for wear (except a small bruise where she had hit the floor), but she was absolutely mortified about ruining the performance. In the end, everyone had decided it was best not to make her stay for the final rankings. She would be sleeping over with Ritsu tonight, and Sawako (coming off a brief but alarming phone conversation with Chika Kawasumi) had managed to gently nudge Tsumugi into going with them.

Yui and Ui had gone home too - the elder sister still a bit mopey about her first romantic adventure, and the younger eager to get her home before she did anything else crazy. Azusa had been the last holdout. Dutiful as usual, she hadn't wanted to leave the event early or "abandon" her teacher, but Sawako had assured her it was all right. There was really nothing to stay for.

Music contests were many and varied, but there were a few things you could count on. Stage time was always one minute too short for comfort, the distance to the nearest parking space was directly proportional to the weight of your instruments... and drama was worth zero points. An spontaneous on-stage kiss; an instrument-wrecking frenzy of enthusiasm; an awkward, hesitant singer suddenly seeing her distant father in the audience and finding her voice - things like that might be life-changing for the players themselves, but they left the judges cold.

No matter how good the reason, a band that didn't finish its set didn't place. Period.

"And this year's winner..."

There was a drumroll, of course. The teacher sighed.

"...Sasunori High!"

Sawako blinked. _No. It can't be. We WON?_

"We won!" she screamed. "We won! We actually won! Stick THAT in your pipe and smoke it, Yamada! We wo-"

She stopped. Everyone within several feet was looking at her.

"Um... they did say Sakuragaoka, right?"

"No," said the woman next to her. "Sasunori."

"...Ah."

Fortunately, the crowd was big enough and the applause loud enough that her interruption had gone mostly unnoticed. The Sasunori band was on stage now, jumping up and down in the rush of victory. Camera flashes were going off all over the room. Another year, another deserving winner.

Sawako's heart sank. She realized now that for all her pragmatism, deep down she'd still been hoping for a miracle.

"Congratulations," said the announcer to the Sasunori kids as they left the stage. "And finally, this year we have a special award - an honourable mention for outstanding effort. The winner is... Ryuumei Academy!"

Hmph. Outstanding effort. A consolation prize, in other words. The judges were showing off their kindheartedness. Probably found some constituency they wanted to score points with.

"Ryuumei Academy! Are they here?"

Wait. Wasn't that...

"Well, we'll catch up with them later. That concludes this category. Now, to present the awards for high school jazz, please welcome Mr. Hiiragi."

Ryuumei Academy. That was them, wasn't it?

It was! _It was them!_

"We won! WE WOONNNN!"

Again there were stares, and again the applause was the only thing keeping her from causing a disturbance - but this time Sawako didn't care. She was in the stratosphere. An honourable mention! For _outstanding effort!_ This wasn't quite a miracle, but she would take it.

"You won, did you?" said Principal Yamada.

Sawako jerked to a halt. Why couldn't she ever see her boss coming? "Y-yes, sir," she said, collecting herself.

"I heard the name Ryuumei, not Sakuragaoka."

"There was a mistake. They had the wrong name for us. It's Ritsu's fault."

"I see," he said.

His face gave nothing away. As nervous as she could ever remember being, Sawako prodded for the verdict. "So isn't that great, sir? The club got an honourable mention!"

"Indeed they did," he replied. "_For their song about the virtues of sloth._"

In every life, there are moments of decision.

"I gave them a chance to prove themselves capable of hard work and commitment. Their answer was to deny that these things are even necessary."

Sawako had decided to abandon her band. She had left them discouraged and disillusioned. They had overcome it, but only by marshalling those negative feelings and turning them into defiance. Defiance of _her_ - and the duty and authority she represented.

She'd forced them to stand up for themselves. They were supposed to be standing up _for the school_.

"I... I didn't..."

"My office, Sawako. Immediately after classes end tomorrow. Do not be late."

Sawako could just barely manage to nod.

There was a brief silence broken by the announcer. "In second place... Takizawa Junior High!"

"Hurrah!" said the principal. "My daughter's school did well. I should get some pictures."

He walked away, but then turned back to Sawako. "The reason I know she won is that the name we just heard is the same as the name of her school."

"Right."

"I felt I should explain that in case you found it confusing."

* * *

Ritsu was usually very comfortable in her room. She had a certain ratio of stuff on the floor to stuff on the shelves which she did her best to maintain. Her mom always nagged her to clean up, and Mio had come up with some creative descriptions over the years ("it looks like a garbage truck crashed into a bookstore"), but this was how she liked it. Nice clean places made her... tense somehow. Here, she could relax.

Today, though, she felt embarrassed about her room for the first time in a while. It wasn't even because Tsumugi was here; it was Mio. She looked like part of the mess. This wasn't a panic attack or a crying fit - nothing so normal. She was just sitting there hugging her knees on the bed, looking half-alive. Ritsu would gladly have cleaned the room if it would have helped her somehow.

She looked around for something they could talk about. "Hey, you were reading _Gunmad GXQ_, right? Did you get up to volume 3?"

"I'm not sure. Let me see."

Ritsu tossed the book over to her. Mio flipped through it. "Yeah, I remember this part. Do you have the next one?"

"It's not out yet. The author got, like, the inside-out flu or something."

"Ah."

The silence returned. Ritsu sighed; what could she say? It wasn't like Mio _hadn't_ blown it.

With an unnecessary knock on the door, Tsumugi came in, carrying a teapot in one hand and a stack of cups in the other. Ritsu smiled. Her mom had offered to make tea for them, but the blonde had insisted on doing it. No complaints from the others on that score (Ritsu because she didn't care much about etiquette, Mio because she didn't have the energy).

Tsumugi set everything down and began filling a cup. "This will be yours, Mio," she said.

"Thanks."

Ritsu took a deep sniff. "Mmmm. That sure smells good... wait, we don't keep this kind of tea here."

"These tea leaves were mine," Tsumugi explained. "I happened to have some with me today."

The drummer would normally have been pleased to get more evidence for her "Mugi is capable of making tea at all times" theory, but in this situation she felt like the Tainaka household was being slighted a bit. "We do _own_ basic refreshments, y'know. And ours rarely cause hallucinations in the drinker."

Mio smiled. "_That's_ what this tastes like - the tea that brought Sawa-chan back to life. I'd forgotten all about it." No surprise to Ritsu; with everything they'd been through, that day felt years away.

"This blend is related, but less powerful," Tsumugi confirmed. "And there's no need to exaggerate. I would never serve anything that caused hallucinations."

"I seem to recall Yui seeing God," said Ritsu.

"Who are we to say she didn't?"

"She told us God looked like the KFC guy!"

"Who are we to say he doesn't?"

Ritsu was working on a retort when it hit her - Tsumugi was being silly. That was good. That was a sign of recovery. "Aw, whatever, you pom-pom. Let's get some of that tea already."

The three girls just sat drinking quietly for a little while. It had been a long, long day.

Eventually Ritsu's phone buzzed. It was an unknown number. Popping the phone open, she said, "I don't want any. Unless it's money."

_"Wait! Don't hang up!"_

"Oh, it's you." Ritsu recognized the voice of the reporter from earlier. "Hey, sorry about this, but I don't think Mio and Mugi are up to chatting right now." (Mio looked puzzled, but Tsumugi nodded in agreement.)

_"Really? That's too bad. I guess we'll just use what we have."_

"Good luck. Lookin' forward to it."

_"Thanks! We'll text you our website address, so check tomorrow. Bye! And congratulations on your special prize!_

"Catch ya later," said Ritsu, hanging up.

"Was that one of those reporters we met?" Mio asked. "I could have talked..."

"Nah, better not. Y'know how you're not supposed to put weight on a muscle after you sprain it?"

Mio nodded. "Right."

"What I'm sayin' is, the brain is a muscle."

"Uh huh."

"I recommend head push-ups to strengthen it."

Tsumugi picked up the pot. "More tea, Ricchan?"

"Thanks. S'okay, I got it." She took it and began filling her cup.

"And how does a head push-up work exactly?" Mio asked.

Ritsu just smiled. She didn't answer. Or move.

"Ricchan! Look out!" said Tsumugi. The drummer's cup was full, but she was still pouring. Her friend grabbed the teapot back before it could overflow the saucer.

"You dummy!" said Mio, snapping her fingers in front of Ritsu's face. "What's wrong?"

"One... one sec."

Ritsu picked up her phone. She opened it. She hit redial.

_"Hello?"_

"_WHAT_ SPECIAL PRIZE?"

* * *

**The Day After Regionals**

Sawako had come to school early every day for weeks. The reason was not industriousness. Tsumugi's gimmick had needed very careful monitoring. The size progression had to be just right: slow enough to pass for weight gain at school, but fast enough to look like pregnancy to the judges at Regionals. Even more important, it had to be tight enough to never slip, but without hurting the person inside. She couldn't let Tsumugi "learn on the job" - it required perfection, and that was Sawako's department.

The original plan had been to reverse the process after Regionals, but that was no longer feasible. Now that Sawako knew Tsumugi's feelings, those one-on-one fitting sessions couldn't possibly continue. Instead, Tsumugi would be taking today and tomorrow off; she would return on Monday, back to normal, and everyone would assume her parents had spent a fortune hiring experts to get her slimmed back down in a hurry.

Despite this, Sawako was once again at school early. The reason was still not industriousness. She was just _terrified_.

Her plan was to wait by the main entrance, catch the principal early, and see if they could have their meeting right away. As much as she feared the guillotine, lying with her head in the frame waiting for it to drop was worse. And at least she would get out of teaching today's classes.

The arrival of a student broke Sawako's train of thought. Students rarely came in this early, but when she saw who it was, she understood. "Good morning, Azusa."

"M-Ms. Sawako. Good morning." Azusa clearly hadn't been expecting anyone to be here.

"Up bright and early today, eh? Any special reason?"

"Uh... not really. I just like coming in early. It makes me feel..." She paused. "No, that's not true. I do have a reason."

"You don't want to run into Jun."

She nodded quietly.

"You can't put that off for long, you know. You'll see her in class."

"We don't have to talk there."

"But you will eventually. So... do you know what you're going to say?"

She shook her head. "I was up half the night over it, and I still can't decide. I want to _strangle_ her. But... this time yesterday she was my friend. Probably my best friend."

"Don't let Yui hear that. You'll break her heart."

"Oh! No, it's just... I mean, Yui's my senior, it's not really the same -"

"I know." Sawako smiled. _Easy to fluster as usual._

"The point is, I'm mad. I don't feel like being the bigger person. But if I'm cold with her now, she'll probably get defensive, and then what? How long does it go on? What if we're never friends again?"

"You're overthinking, Azusa. I'd say you're entitled to be angry for a while. If she's worth making up with, she'll understand that."

Azusa nodded, but still looked unsure. She wasn't done overthinking by a long shot.

_Poor kid_, thought Sawako. She often found Azusa annoying for much the same reason Ritsu did - she was so serious about everything. It could be stressful being around someone like that. Until now, looking down at her student's tortured face, Sawako had never really understood how tough it was to _be_ someone like that.

"It's going to be okay," the teacher said. It wasn't something she said a lot - she had no proof, after all - but she was starting to realize it was still worth saying.

"Do you really think so?"

"Sure. These things happen."

Azusa looked up, suddenly pleased. "Right! You must know what this is like! How do you deal with it, Teacher?"

"With what?"

"Friends betraying you! It must happen all the -"

Azusa stopped short and slowly turned to meet Sawako's eyes. They had gone from warm to absolute zero.

"I should probably get to class, Teacher," she said.

"You should probably do that," Sawako agreed.

Azusa scurried away.

_Some people._ Sawako shook her head and turned back to the door. To her surprise, there were already other students arriving. She must have spent longer with Azusa than she'd thought.

Wait... how much longer exactly? Long enough for...?

Sawako dashed upstairs to the teachers' offices. She couldn't have missed the principal coming in, could she? The conversation with Azusa hadn't been _that_ long!

She made it to the office and breathed a huge sigh of relief - no one was there yet. Even so, best to make sure. Sawako unlocked the door and turned on the lights inside. As long as the principal's sign wasn't up yet, she should be okay...

"Thank you," said Principal Yamada, catching the office door before it closed.

"No problem," Sawako replied, still waiting for her eyes to adj- "Ack! You're here!"

"Does that really warrant such shock?"

"Er, no, of course not. Sorry." Sawako jerked her brain back into plan mode. "Sir, I was wondering if you'd mind -"

The principal was staring down. "Really, Sawako? No indoor shoes?"

Sawako reddened. "I didn't have... I mean, I was in a..."

"I prefer not to see my staff tracking mud through the school. It makes it more difficult to set an example for -"

"Sorry! I'll get them! Hang on!"

Sawako ran back into the hallway. She made it about thirty feet before stopping cold, smacking her forehead, and turning around. Naturally, the principal's door was shut, "Do Not Disturb" sign on display. He was already busy filling out paperwork - if nothing else, Principal Yamada's work ethic was unimpeachable.

So much for Plan A. Sawako had a full day in that guillotine frame to look forward to.

She sighed and went to get her indoor shoes. No sense leaving an improperly-dressed corpse.

* * *

Sakuragaoka was a fairly upscale high school. It wasn't some sequestered academy with a rigid code of manners, but that didn't mean the students couldn't behave themselves. For instance, the morning arrival period might be noisy, but it was still orderly. Students got their things and proceeded to class without incident.

Usually.

"FREEEEEDDDDOOOOOOMMMM!"

Mio covered her ears. "Owww."

"Oh, I'm sorry, does my freedom pain you?"

Students began gathering to see what the fuss was about. "Ritsu!" said one of them. "Your chair and casts are gone!"

"That's right! I'm FREE!"

A younger girl, looking nervous, asked, "C-can I sign your leg?"

Ritsu gave her a look. "_Really_ not how it works."

"Way to go, Ritsu!" said Yui. "You recuperated like a pro!"

"You too! Look, everybody! Yui can see again!"

A general "Ooooo!" came from the crowd.

"That's right!" said Yui. "It's so great! I feel a solo coming on!"

There were a number of sighs.

"La la la... I can see clearly now! The rain is g-" Yui tripped over someone's backpack.

"Still can't see all obstacles in her way, though," Mio whispered to Ritsu, earning a grin.

Yui got to her feet. "Oww."

"Singing takes too much concentration," Ritsu told her. "Just let it out! FREEDOM!"

"Yeah! Justice!"

"Uh, no. I don't think we're on speaking terms with justice right now. Go with freedom."

"Freedom!"

"All caps! FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

They began proceeding to class, still chanting. As they went along, other students began joining the parade. Mio rolled her eyes, partly at the spectacle and partly at Ritsu's latest turn of phrase. What was next, "scroll lock"?

"You too, Mio!" said Ritsu. "You're free of those dumb glasses! FREEDOM!"

"No thanks."

"C'mon! FREEDOM!"

Well... she _did_ appreciate being rid of the things. "Freedom."

"FREEDOM!"

Oh, all right. "FREEDOM!"

"Yeah! And Tsumugi's losin' that spare tire as we speak! FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!" everyone cheered. Tsumugi was popular; her recent "image change" had been alarming.

"And Sawa-chan's ditching her contacts! FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

"And now that I'm back on my feet, the janitors don't have to clean those disabled washrooms anymore! Maybe they'll make 'em into supply rooms or something! FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

"And Yui, you don't need your annoying sister around anymore! FREEDOM!"

"FREE-" Yui stopped. "Hey! Ui isn't annoying!"

"FREEDOM!" shouted another girl enthusiastically. When Yui glared, she sheepishly explained, "The extra chair was in my way a lot."

"Yeah! FREEDOM! And Azusa -"

The non-members stared. "What about her?"

"Yeah. What _about_ her," Mio hissed at Ritsu.

"Uh, Azusa doesn't have to put up with all our problems anymore! FREEDOM!"

That worked for the crowd. "FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

"FREEDOM!"

"FREE-"

They were at their class door. It was open. Ms. Kawasumi was standing there, looking at the impromptu parade the way the Queen would look at a breakdancing party in her throne room.

"I'm not with them," said Mio, zipping off to her class.

_She pays for that later,_ Ritsu mentally grumbled. She cleared her throat and addressed Ms. Kawasumi. "So. Um... detention, usual time?"

The teacher considered. "Not if you stop now."

There was a collective sigh of relief. Everyone hurried to their seats. Ritsu followed, happy to escape punishment, but slightly glum to have her parade quashed. "We were just celebrating freedom."

"Welcome to life," said Ms. Kawasumi. "You're only as free as you're _allowed_ to be."

* * *

Somehow it didn't surprise Ms. Yamasu to find Sawako waiting in the office, staring at the principal's door. "Hi. Still trying to jump ship?"

"Just the opposite. I want to talk him out of firing me."

"What makes you think he'll do that?"

Sawako explained about the Regionals bargain. "It's funny," she concluded. "We actually did win something, but the way we did it may have made everything worse."

"Even so, congratulations," said Yamasu, eyes wide. She couldn't believe Sawako's club had pulled it together, especially after Jun's big betrayal.

...Right. That.

"I owe you an apology," she said with great reluctance; this was not a position she had ever expected to be in relative to Sawako. "I should have put a stop to what Jun was doing."

Sawako waved it off. "You didn't think she was serious. I've been there. These kids are _nuts_."

"Even so, I should at least have warned you." And why hadn't she, really? Why had the thought never even crossed her mind?

"You can't possibly compete with how badly _I_ screwed up. When your club succeeds, it's not in _spite_ of you."

Yamasu smiled a bit. _Nope. If MY kids ever succeed, it'll be in spite of themselves._

"Oh, dammit!" said Sawako.

"What?"

"He's eating his lunch in there. I thought I might be able to catch him on the way out. No such luck."

"Want my advice?"

"Sure."

"Stop trying to get it over with early. You have a little time to prepare. Don't waste it stressing out."

Sawako sighed. "You're right. I always do this."

"I see students do it all the time. It's a hard habit to break."

"I guess I'll go eat." Sawako picked up her bag. "Thanks, Megumi. That was some sound teacherly advice."

Yamasu closed, rolled, and opened her eyes. "I'd rather you called it _friendly_ advice."

Sawako paused; a smile appeared, quickly broadening. "Friendly it is."

She opened the door. On her way through, she turned and asked, "By the way, how's the head?"

"Better," said Yamasu. And she intended to keep it that way. She'd brought _two_ flasks today.

* * *

Azusa usually ate lunch in class. Sometimes she ate in the cafeteria for variety. She'd tried the roof a time or two. Wherever Ui and Jun felt like going, she was usually okay with.

There was just one place she made a point of not eating: the music room. Oh, she knew she could if she wanted to - lots of students ate in their clubrooms. Azusa just felt like it would be somehow disrespectful.

Today, respect wasn't such a priority. She was no longer sure this particular club deserved any... and more important, she needed to be alone.

For five minutes, she was. Then -

"Hi! I didn't expect you to be here first."

Azusa looked up at Mio with some surprise. The feeling was mutual. "Hi, senior. Don't you usually eat with the others?"

"Didn't Ritsu tell you? We're meeting here today to read the article!"

"The article?"

"The one we did the interviews for, remember? It's supposed to go up at noon!"

Ah, right. "Did you and Tsumugi get to talk to them?"

"Yeah. They were the ones who gave us the news about our prize! It's so exciting!"

Azusa nodded with all the enthusiasm she could muster. She hoped Mio couldn't tell how little that was.

All along, even if no one else in the band had believed they might win, Azusa really had. Right up until the second last day, she'd kept the faith. Sawako quitting had been rough; Jun's betrayal had been rougher. But she hadn't given up, and for a few shining moments, as they were playing Mio's new song, she'd just _known_ that in spite of everything, her faith was about to be rewarded.

Then Mio fainted, Ritsu cracked a stupid joke, and it was all over.

Azusa felt different today. It was like something inside her had finally given way. One bright autumn day months ago, Azusa had seen a band perform and fallen in love with it at first sight. Since then, despite what they were like in their off hours, she'd fought to keep believing _that_ was the real light music club. Today she didn't feel like fighting anymore.

These people were exactly as they appeared, nothing more or less. Yui wasn't a genius with slacker tendencies, she was a slacker with moments of genius. Ritsu was a competent drummer and an incompetent club president. Tsumugi was a puff of cotton, happy to float wherever the wind took her.

And Mio, whom Azusa had admired the most, was all bark and no bite. She could come through any time _except_ when it really counted. Her will would never be as powerful as her fear.

Azusa felt like a religious believer whose god had missed one prophecy too many. What did she have to show for these months in the club? A lost friend, a fading tan, and half a concert.

Mio seemed happy about the prize, so Azusa wasn't going to rock the boat. But to her, the fact that their _lies_ had been rewarded just made everything worse.

"You all right?" asked Mio.

"Yeah. Sorry."

Mio wasn't fooled. She sat down beside Azusa. "Is this about Jun?"

"Not onl- uh, yeah."

"I'm so sorry that happened. I really thought the others were just being silly, making that bet and all."

"Pssh," said Ritsu, entering the room with Yui. "You had digits 8 and 9."

"Just in _case_! I didn't think she would really quit. She seemed so sincere..."

"In her flattery, ya mean? Of course _you_ didn't suspect anything - she was buttering you up. To us, that was the _most_ suspicious part. You're good, but you're not super ultra triple-ply good."

Mio glared. "That was _not_ the most suspicious part. What about the tape recorder? The way she ambushed us every morning? The time she took all our fingerprints 'just to have them on file'?"

"And she never actually quit the jazz club! I asked!" Yui chipped in.

Azusa sighed. "Even you could tell, senior?"

"A ninja must see underneath the underneath!" The guitarist held her hands around her eyes like a mask.

"Sorry," Ritsu said. "We really did think you knew."

"So why wasn't I in on the bet?"

"Being corrupt personally is one thing. We drew a line at corrupting the young."

"Ah."

The kettle, which had been getting louder for a while, started boiling. Mio got up to make the tea; Yui immediately stole her seat and started squeezing Azusa. Ritsu smiled. "Easier to find her now that you can see her again, eh?"

Yui rolled her eyes. Apparently the idea that she would _ever_ have trouble locating Azusa was preposterous.

Returning with the teapot, Mio filled everyone's cups. Azusa took a deep breath and immediately felt better. Tsumugi might be the teamaker supreme, but Mio was no slouch. The four girls took their first sips and sank into their chairs in deep satisfaction.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry about Jun," said Azusa. "I should've known right away what she was doing. She... wasn't who I thought she was."

"S'okay," said Ritsu. "Everybody's entitled to make a few mistakes."

"Thank y-"

"Three, in your case."

"Three?!"

"It was five to start. You used up one with Jun and another when you missed that note yesterday."

"But _you_ -"

Ritsu held up a hand. "Don't even try it. Senior members have more capacity."

"How much exactly?" Yui asked.

"If I tell you, you'll spend it all in one place."

As Yui disputed this, Azusa sat back and just relaxed. For once, she wasn't conflicted about drinking in the clubroom. They deserved a slack day after all they'd been through. But more than that, Azusa was feeling a strange serenity. This day, this togetherness, felt special.

After all... everything felt special when it might be the last time.

* * *

There was a knock at the office door. Ms. Yamasu got up and opened it - and had to stifle a laugh. She wasn't surprised at _who_ was there, but... "Jun, you can't possibly tie up hair that short."

She sighed. "How bad does it look?"

"Like you got chewing gum stuck in your hair. Twice."

"Rats." She reached for one of the hair ties to pull it out. "I just... wanted to be back to normal, you know?"

"I understand. You can't force it, though. Messing with your hair won't fix the real problem."

Jun looked to one side.

"I take it you haven't run into the real problem yet."

"I skipped this morning," she said apologetically. "I don't know what to say to her."

As a teacher, Ms. Yamasu couldn't approve of truancy... but she'd seen the state Jun was in last night. If a few missed classes had helped her recover, Yamasu would let it slide. "Just don't miss the afternoon."

"But what do I tell her? She'll be in those classes..."

Wait... _in_ them? "Are you talking about Target Zero here?"

"Azusa. Yeah."

Yamasu frowned. "She's not the 'real problem' I was talking about. You're friends. You can work it out."

"Then who's the real problem?"

"Your _teacher!_ Jun, don't you understand what you did? You sabotaged the club five minutes before stage time! If Mio hadn't shown up, they might not have made it at all!"

"O-oh. Yeah. But..."

"But what?"

"Sawa-chan can't really criticize, can she? She quit too."

Yamasu glared. "First of all, don't call her that. Second, no matter what mistakes she made, it's not your place to judge her. She's your elder, your teacher, _and_ your club advisor."

"But she -"

"No! This is about _you_. Your mistakes, your duty. Jun, do you know the one thing you did right this month?"

"What?"

"You went around calling me things like Captain. It was kind of annoying, but the principle was right. I was the one in charge of this supposed mission you were on. So you showed me respect... that is, right up until the one time it counted."

Jun turned red, remembering that scream in Ms. Yamasu's ear. "Sorry."

"You may not be a spy or a soldier, but you do have a job. You're a student. Do it right from now on. Obey your superior officers, and let us answer to ours." _And to ourselves_, thought Yamasu. The memory of Sawako at the bar, drowning in regret and self-loathing, was still fresh.

"So... what do I say to Ms. Sawako, then?"

"An offer of seppuku would be appropriate."

"_What?_"

"Kidding, kidding." Jun's reaction came as a relief to Yamasu - samurai rituals would've been right up her alley this past month. "Just apologize profusely and accept punishment. I'm sure she'll let you stay in the club after that."

The student was quiet.

"Jun?"

"I... I don't think I want to stay in the light music club," she said, looking a bit bashful. "I think... I want to come back to yours."

Yamasu felt a smile spread across her face. She wondered why. This wasn't really good news, was it? Somehow, though, hearing this annoying student ask to rejoin her terrible jazz club made Yamasu feel happier than she had in ages.

"Okay, Jun. But that doesn't get you out of apologizing to Sawako."

"Right. Thanks, Ms. Yamasu. You're... a really good teacher."

Yamasu was still smiling as Jun left. Her hand, however, was halfway to the flask.

* * *

Mio looked at Ritsu. "Well?"

"Well what?"

"Let's see the article!"

"What arti- oh! Right!" The drummer pulled out her phone.

Yui fretted. "I hope they got my good side."

"I don't think they took any pictures," Azusa said. "Anyway, do you even know which side is your good one?"

"Left," she said.

"My left or your left?"

"You have your own left?"

"Got it!" Ritsu interrupted. "I'll send the address around."

All three of the other girls' cell phones buzzed at once. They opened Ritsu's mail and -

"Oh, you're here," said Sawako, closing the door behind her.

Everyone put their phones away immediately. Then they looked at each other, surprised at their common reflex. All four girls had the same thought: _I know what I told those interviewers about Sawa-chan, but what did YOU tell them?_

"May I?" their teacher asked. Mio and Azusa quickly opened up a space between them. Sawako sat down and poured herself some tea.

"Had that meeting with the principal yet?" Ritsu asked.

She didn't answer; she just leaned back in her chair and let the tea soak through her, easing her stress. It occurred to the others that she hadn't been present for the late-night emergency practice. This was Sawako's first clubroom tea all month. She would probably be in bliss mode until her third cup or so.

Mio whispered to Ritsu, "She's having a rough time. Let's talk about something that won't remind her."

Ritsu nodded. After a moment's thought, she said, "So, anybody heard from Mugi today?"

Sawako's hand shook slightly. A bit of her tea spilled on her shirt.

"Not me," said Yui. "She slept over with you, right?"

"Yeah, but she was already gone when we woke up. Quite the early riser, our Mugi."

"It was a bit rude," Mio said. "I mean, she thanked Ritsu's parents and all, but she could at least have woken us to say goodbye."

"Guess she's still upset," said Yui.

Mio traded a look with Ritsu. "You noticed that too?"

"Yeah. Mugi usually smiles all the time. Yesterday she only did it when we were looking."

Ritsu nodded. "Good eye. But wait, if she smiled when we were looking, how did you... oh, right." Yui was holding her hands around her eyes in circles, reminding Ritsu that she'd been wearing dark glasses. Behind those lenses, she could look in any direction unnoticed.

"Didn't that gesture mean a ninja mask earlier?" asked Azusa.

"It's in disguise now," Yui explained.

Sawako set down her glass and sighed. "I can't believe I forgot."

"Forgot what?" asked Mio.

"There's somewhere I need to be. Thanks for the tea, girls. I needed it." She got up to go.

"Wait! You didn't tell us about -"

"Haven't had the meeting yet. It'll be after school. I'll come here afterward."

Ritsu nodded. "We'll be here, Sawa-chan. Good luck."

The teacher nodded back and headed out. There was general tension among those left behind.

"Whattaya think'll happen?" Ritsu asked.

"What else _can_ happen?" said Azusa. "She failed. She had to lead us to a win and we lost."

"We let her down," said Mio sadly.

"Oh, like it's our fault!" Ritsu protested. "We tried our butts off!"

"At the wrong things," said Azusa. "We put all our effort into the gimmicks and neglected the thing that actually mattered: our performance."

"But the gimmicks were Sawa-chan's idea! She _insisted_!"

"I don't think she realized how much they would distract us," Mio said.

"And we didn't have to let them!" added Azusa. She was sick to death of everyone, even Mio, dodging responsibility. "We overdid it! You taking those glasses so seriously, Yui acting like she really _was_ blind half the time..."

Ritsu calmly said, "I have a nuke, Nakano. Don't make me use it."

"Like you can talk! You were the worst one! Your 'stealth game', your solos and detentions... and hey, when are we gonna hear why we _really_ had to wear another school's name tags, huh? What happened to that school's real band? Did they miss out just so we could humiliate ourse-"

"The biggest distraction was Jun," said Ritsu.

Azusa's mouth closed.

"She kept us dancing around all month. And she was _your_ friend. She joined to mess with _you_. That big wrench in the engine cut our chances in half. You're the most to blame, and you _know_ it."

"Ritsu..." said Mio.

"I warned her. Now she can deal. She's got _no_ room to criticize."

Azusa finally found her tongue. "W-well, fine! So what? I don't have to be perfect to call _this_ club out!"

"Oh, you still here?"

"YES! Yes I am! But you know what? Maybe it's time I -"

The bell rang. Mio and Yui quickly started packing up their lunches; they nudged Ritsu and Azusa respectively to do the same. Reluctantly, they broke off their fight to get ready for class.

"We'll meet here again right after school," said Mio. "Oh, the article! Nobody read it until then!"

"I wasn't supposed to read it?" said Yui - quickly followed by "Just kidding!" when Mio shot her a glare.

Azusa took off, as did Mio. As the other two headed for class at their usual relaxed pace, Ritsu muttered to Yui, "God, what a twerp."

"That's mean. Azu-nyan's right about all those things."

Ritsu sighed. "I know. I think I'd like her better if she were full of crap once in a while."

* * *

Yamasu had assumed she could hide her flask fast enough to fool anyone who came in. She was wrong by about half a second.

"Alcohol? Really?" said Kawasumi. "I told you, with all that aspirin you took -"

"Took. Past tense." Yamasu wiped her mouth. "It's not in my system anymore."

"How can you be sure?"

"Have you ever taken a whole handful of aspirin? I did some extra-strength throwing up later. Trust me, my system was _empty_ after that."

The other teacher sighed. "Well, it's your body. Don't say I didn't warn you."

Since her cover was blown, Yamasu took the flask back out and had another swig. When Kawasumi did a bad job of hiding her distaste, she reminded her, "I seem to recall catching you in the smoking zone yesterday."

"Megumi, why do you _need_ that stuff so much?"

"The job. The kids. The _noise_."

"So why don't you get some other job?"

Yamasu leaned on one hand and smiled bemusedly. "Would you believe this is all I ever wanted to do?"

"Really?"

"Yep. Teaching the next generation of musicians... it was my dream. I just had no idea the next generation of musicians was so _terrible_."

"Well, they're only in high school..."

She shrugged. "That's when I discovered music. I wanted to help others do the same. I guess it didn't occur to me that _lots_ of people get interested, but the real talents are like needles in a haystack. You have to dig through a lot of horse manure to get to them."

"But you stay."

"It's a steady paycheck - safer than performing. I'm used to it." She raised her flask as if in a toast. "Living the dream, baby."

For a minute or so, Kawasumi just stood there thinking.

"Something on your mind, huh? Want to talk about it?"

The other teacher gave her a plaintive, almost pathetic look.

" 'No' is an option," Yamasu clarified.

Kawasumi let out a breath. "Thank you. Nothing personal."

Yamasu smiled. This _was_ something personal - but not about her. It had taken her a while to notice that Kawasumi was a very private person, but from now on she was going to respect that.

The other teacher walked over to the principal's door and knocked. He waved her in; then she noticed the sign. "Oh! Sorry, sir, I won't -"

"Quite all right. Have a seat."

"But if you don't want to be disturbed..."

He smiled. "I've decided to use the sign as a test of will."

* * *

Sawako shook her head. What had possessed her to think she had the afternoon off? She hadn't checked on Tsumugi since they'd all gone home last night. The girl's mental state was fragile right now - she needed monitoring. Forcing herself through Regionals right after a crushing rejection was going to have consequences.

A certain irony about that last observation occurred to Sawako, but her case was different. She was an adult, responsible for her own mistakes. She could push herself through one more day.

The start-of-class bell was ringing as Sawako went out the front door. She headed for her ca-

"WAIT!"

Hm?

"Sawa-cha- I mean, Target Pri- I mean, Ms. Sawako! Wait!"

She turned around, but saw no one there... until she looked down. Jun was in a pose of abject supplication. She was face-down, with her knees folded under her and her arms stretched out in front. And in her cupped hands... "What's that?"

"All my money. Please accept it in restitution."

Sawako sighed. "Get up, Jun."

"But I -"

"Quickly. And put that pouch away before someone robs you."

The bassist picked herself up and pocketed her money. "Are you sure?"

"More than sure. I'd be breaking a lot of rules if I took that."

Jun blushed to realize she had technically been trying to get Sawako in even more trouble. "Sorry!"

"Forget i-"

"For all of it!" She started bowing over and over. "The whole thing! Sorry sorry sorry! I never meant to hurt anyone!"

Sawako's eyes widened. "You're about to hurt _yourself_. Stop that before your brain gets scrambled."

"Sorry!" Jun straightened up.

"So, uh..."

She tensed, awaiting her punishment.

"Well, you did something pretty awful, Jun. So I'll have to... um..."

_Who am I to come down on her for this? I was hardly a saint this month. I mean, I just left the girls to their fate. What's worse, abandonment or acts of sabotage?_

_...No, wait, acts of sabotage are a lot worse. But even so, I was their teacher. She was just a... friend and colleague... who was best friends with one of them..._

_Okay, but still, she's just a dumb kid. Too dumb to know that... um, betrayal is wrong? But I... I can't judge... even if she IS one of my students and a member of my -_

"Oh, forget it. You can wash my car at lunch for the next two weeks."

"Got it! I'll start now!"

"No, you'll go to _class_ now. But there's somewhere else you should go after school."

"Yes?"

"The music room."

She looked away. "I don't think I should stay in the clu-"

"Oh, you're _not_ staying. I didn't say you could, did I? Traitors do not get tenure and pensions."

The corners of Jun's mouth rose just a little, and Sawako knew she had guessed right: she wanted to go back to the jazz club. After what she'd done, she couldn't show her face in the light music club again, even if everyone forgave her. But in her own club, she could still get things right.

That said... "I pointed it out because I'm not the only one you have to apologize to. You should seize the opportunity."

"Right! Sorry again! And thank you!"

She ran for the school door. Sawako called after her, "One more thing, Jun."

"Yeah?"

"Do not offer Ritsu the money."

* * *

Mio's math teacher had sent her to the office to pick up a folder he'd left behind. She was happy enough to help... though if she were more like Ritsu, she would consider him still on thin ice for that train question on the test. _If_ she were more like Ritsu.

She knocked; a teacher got the door. It was Ms. Yamasu, who had taught one of Mio's classes last year. "Hi, Mio," she said. "What do you need?"

She explained, and the teacher let her in. Unfortunately, the file cabinet where the folder was supposed to be was locked. "Do you have the key?" Mio asked.

"Yep. I'll have to find it, though. Mind if I go to the bathroom first? You know how it is... liquid in, liquid out."

Mio liked Ms. Yamasu - most of her students did - but every once in a while she provided way too much information. It tended to coincide with those occasions when she seemed a bit unsteady on her feet.

As she was leaving, a cellphone on a nearby desk went off. "That's been happening for hours," Ms. Yamasu said, wincing. "Can you make it stop? I can barely work my own phone."

"I'll try," said Mio, who could also barely work her own phone, but wasn't about to refuse a teacher's request.

Ms. Yamasu left. The noise from the phone stopped; Mio carefully picked it up. At arm's length, she opened it and looked for the volume setting...

...only for it to go off again. Acting on pure reflex, Mio pressed Talk. Then she froze, realizing what she'd done. Was it too late to -

_"Hello? Sawako?"_

Uh oh.

_"Are you there? You finally picked up, so come on, let's talk."_

Trembling, Mio raised the phone to her ear. "S-sorry. Ms., um, Yamako... I mean, Sawanaka... _Sawa-chan isn't here!_"

_" 'Sawa-chan'?"_

The caller's baffled reaction reminded Mio that she wasn't supposed to use that nickname with other adults. "Ms. Sawako. She isn't here."

_"What? Then who are you?"_

"I'm not her."

_"...I gathered that. Who ARE you?"_

How did this become about Mio? "That's personal! In fact - who are you, huh? _Huh?_"

_"It's Tetsuo. Now who's this? You must know Sawako if you're answering her phone, right?"_

Whew. Now that the caller was identified, Mio found herself suddenly calmer. She was no longer fending off some random stranger who might track her down and mug her. At least now she knew -

Wait. She _did_ know. She knew all too much about this person.

"This is Mio," she said. "From the light music club. We met once."

_"Mio... the, uh, tall one, right?"_

Somehow Mio doubted that was the main thing Tetsuo had noticed about her. "Right. We had our big competition yesterday. I'm sure Sawa-chan mentioned it..."

_"Of course. How did you do?"_

"She quit in our second last practice. Over you. Then she nearly drank herself to death. _Over you._"

_"...Oh."_

"She told us what you're really like. We know you're not rich and you rejected her harshly."

_"Come on! She PROPOSED! It was crazy!"_

"It was love. She put her whole heart on the line, and you... you just... how _dare_ you call her now?"

_"To apologize! I want to make things right!"_

That surprised Mio a bit. "I thought you were done with -"

_"No! Listen, Mio, I... I screwed up._

She raised an eyebrow. He actually sounded sincere.

_"I did some stupid, awful things. I know that. I've got to get her to listen and give me a second chance. Your teacher is someone really special. I don't want to lose her."_

"Well..."

_"Haven't you ever made a big mistake before? Messed things up with someone important to you?"_

"...Yes..." _All too many times_, she had to admit to herself.

_"So listen... Sawako won't hear me out, but she'll hear you. Can you please put in a good word for me? Just tell her how sorry I am. Please!"_

Mio thought carefully.

Right now, Tetsuo didn't sound like the unrepentant user Sawako had described. It was certainly _possible_ that he wanted to change - that he'd just been caught off-guard by the proposal and reacted badly. Mio could relate to that (as little as she wanted to) and she did believe in second chances. But how could she possibly help him after all he'd put Sawako through?

She had to find out if it was worth it. Mio didn't know a whole lot about adult relationships, and what she did know terrified her - but she wasn't a child either. She knew one day, not so far off, she would be as close to a man as Sawako had been to Tetsuo. She would want to... do things with him.

And she knew that day would absolutely not come unless something else came first.

"Mr. Tsukamoto," she said, "suppose I offered to tell Sawa-chan one more thing besides your apology. Just one thing. What would you want me to tell her?"

_"H-huh?"_

"Just the first thing that comes into your head when you picture talking to her again. What is it?"

_"Uh... I'm really sorry for -"_

"Besides the apology. In fact, forget the apology. Suppose this is the only thing you can say to try and get through to her. It's your one and only chance. What do you tell her?"

_"I... I... I really like you, Sawako! I think we were great together!"_

Mio sadly shook her head, though she knew he couldn't see her. "I'm sorry, Mr. Tsukamoto. That was the wrong answer."

_"Oh, love, right? It had to be love? Come on! That's what I meant to say!"_

"I don't believe you. If you loved her, I wouldn't even have had to ask. You would have told me to give her that message before anything else."

_"It was a trick question! Gimme a break! You've gotta tell her I've changed!_

"I hope you have, sir. I wish you the best. But stay away from Sawa-chan."

_"Wait! I -"_

Mio hung up. Then she found the menu button (on the third try), found where it said 'Block Number', and selected it. She put the phone back on the desk, confident that it wouldn't be going off and bothering Ms. Yamasu again.

When Mio had said "Sawa-chan", Tetsuo had clearly been startled. And yes, Mio knew she really should call her Ms. Sawako. Ms. Yamanaka would be even more appropriate. Or Ma'am. Teacher. Miss. But she hadn't done that in a long time, and neither did the other club members.

They called her Sawa-chan. Like "Mugi". Like "Ricchan". Like "Azu-nyan".

It wasn't about disrespect - well, it _was_, but not exclusively. Sawako was less than their teacher, but she was more than that too. She was one of them.

And they would protect her.

* * *

The science teacher had just left, so Ritsu's class had a few minutes before Ms. Kawasumi would come back to teach history. The drummer glanced back at Yui. Yep - still at it. She got up and moved to Yui's desk.

"Hey Ricchan. Is it nice being able to walk around again?"

"It's exactly as nice as you bein' able to see again, if you get me."

"Ha!"

Ritsu pointed at the papers on Yui's desk. "So every time I've turned around today, you've been workin' on something. What gives?"

"Oh, this? It's a song! Take a look!"

Ritsu picked up the top sheet. "Hmm. Happy, jumping... kinda Mio-y so far... wait, 'study after school'? Since when?"

"That's the point! I was thinking about Mio's new song from yesterday. It was great, but taking a break is what got the principal so mad at us in the first place, right?"

"Right..."

"So I'm writing something he'll like better. If we play it for him, maybe he'll let Sawa-chan off the hook!"

Ritsu considered. "Could work. But when are we gonna do it? The big meeting happens after school today, and it's already second last period."

Yui's eyebrows slanted. "I have a plan!"

"Oh _do_ ya now."

"I finish writing the song this period. Then we pull the fire alarm! Everybody has to run outside! In the confusion, we grab the principal, hit him with some stuff..."

Ritsu facepalmed.

"...bring him to the music room, and play the song when he wakes up! We should even have time to practice while he's out!"

"Yui, that plan isn't just crazy. It's _Ritsu_ crazy." She paused. "So I guess I'm flattered."

Yui sighed. "I know. But we've got to do something! What's going to happen to us if Sawa-chan goes to jail?"

"She's not going to _jail_. And if she did, I think we both know she'd end up ownin' the place." Ritsu patted Yui's shoulder. "You need to relax."

"Can't we do _anything_ to help?"

"Hope an' pray. That's about it. You know what they say about accepting the things you can't change... well, this is one of 'em."

"I guess. It's hard, though."

Ritsu, who had continued skimming the lyrics as they talked, suddenly raised an eyebrow. _Huh. Maybe she's better at this 'accepting' business than she gives herself credit for._

She handed the lyrics back to Yui. " 'Our love will be rejected, but let's go anyway', huh? You feelin' bouncy on that particular topic already?"

Yui smiled, though not with any great enthusiasm. "Bouncy isn't really the word, Ricchan. Maybe... okay."

"Workin' on your next stalking plan already?"

She shook her head. "I'm done with Matsuo. He's just a jerk. He doesn't respect me."

Ritsu nodded. She knew better, but that was something Yui shouldn't hear about for a while - not until it was safe.

"I feel okay about it now. Mostly."

"Even after all that time you wasted moonin' over him?"

"That wasn't a waste, Ricchan. That was practice."

Ritsu shook her head. "Do not get it. Seriously don't. Love just screwed you over. Love screwed Sawa-chan even worse. Love screws Mio every time she tries. Love _sucks_. Why not just forget about it?"

"Because we'll get it right someday. All of us. You too!"

Ritsu looked at her skeptically. "You really think so?"

Yui beamed. "I'm a believer."

* * *

Sawako had known for a long time that Tsumugi was rich. She'd seen the pictures of the villa. She'd heard the principal's budgetary reminders. Hell, she'd tasted the tea. Any serious tea drinker could tell that stuff was well beyond grocery-store quality.

But nothing had quite prepared her for the Kotobuki mansion.

She'd been greeted at the door by a butler, who handed her off to a maid, who handed her to _another_ maid. It had taken ten minutes and two flights of stairs just to get from the entrance to Tsumugi's room. All along the way, she was peppered with questions about "the young mistress." How was she doing at school? Did she have a lot of friends? Why had she changed her mind about the choir club and chosen light music of all things? Oh, no offense, ma'am!

These people weren't just employees - they cared deeply for the family they served. Sawako wasn't surprised, but it was all a bit overwhelming. She wished she had more to tell them. As a mere club advisor, she didn't see much of Tsumugi during the day... usually.

They finally reached Tsumugi's room; the maid knocked. "Miss Tsumugi! Your teacher is here to see you!"

"Oh! Please come in."

They entered. Again, Sawako was unprepared for the size of the place - it took her several seconds just to _find_ Tsumugi. She was in casual clothes (as casual as you'd ever see on an heiress, anyway) and didn't look particularly upset, at least at this distance. Sawako breathed a sigh of relief: so far, so good. She'd half-expected to find Tsumugi in sackcloth and ashes.

The maid asked, "Shall I bring -"

Tsumugi shot her a furious warning look.

"Oh! Sorry!" The maid ducked out the door and closed it. Clearly Tsumugi wanted to see this guest in private.

"Have a seat!" she told Sawako, immediately back to her normal self. The teacher raised an eyebrow, but sat down in the chair (one of _eight!_) that Tsumugi had indicated.

"You seem to be doing all right," she began.

"Yes," said Tsumugi. "So do you."

Hmm? Oh... yes, Sawako _had_ been through a few things herself, hadn't she? "I'll be okay. I didn't come here to talk about me."

"Is your job secure?"

"I, uh, won't know till later."

Tsumugi whispered, "I can see to it that it is."

"No! I mean, that's not why -"

"I know. But I _can_ arrange it."

Sawako was not such a good person that she could refuse the offer without thinking it over. She took a few moments. But... "No. Thanks, Tsumugi, but if my boss wants to fire me, I don't want him forced not to. He would make my life hell for it."

"Understood."

"Anyway, that's not the point. I came to see how you were doing."

Tsumugi looked away; her expression soured a bit. "I would rather you did not give me any special attention. Under the circum-"

"No, it's not just me. Everyone's wondering if you're okay. Mio and Ritsu said you were gone when they woke up."

"Yes. I... I wanted to be alone."

Sawako could tell now that Tsumugi wasn't quite as okay as she'd seemed from a distance. Her hair wasn't brushed, and her eyes... "Did you get any sleep last night?"

"Some," she said. "Not very much. I found it hard to put my thoughts aside and rest."

They were quiet for a while. Finally Sawako said, "Tsumugi, I'm so sorry."

"It isn't your fault."

"It _is_. I encouraged you. I should've realized what I was doing."

Tsumugi looked down. "You had no reason to suspect something so foolish."

Well... Sawako couldn't claim it _hadn't_ been foolish. "All the same, I'm sorry."

"Don't let this trouble you. It was unavoidable. I'm sure I won't be the last student you have to reject."

A sad thought came to Sawako. She didn't want to suggest this, but if it would help... "Tsumugi, if being around me makes things harder for you -"

"No, stay here. I will have to learn to deal with it; I may as well start now."

"I'm saying you don't have to. I'll understand if you can't stay in the light music club."

Tsumugi looked up with sudden anger. "No."

"Hey, don't -"

"You have no right."

"What?"

"I offered myself to you. If you had said yes, I would have done anything you asked without question. But _you said no!_ That was your choice! I won't sacrifice anything more for -"

"Tsumugi, calm down! I don't want you to leave! I just thought it might make _you_ happier!"

"...Oh." The blonde took a deep breath.

"I was thinking about what happened to me in junior high," Sawako explained. "I fell pretty hard for my drama club president. I thought things were going well with him, but when he realized I wanted more than friendship, he turned me down. After that, I tried staying in the club, but I had to quit after a week. I couldn't take being around him."

Tsumugi nodded slowly. "Well, thank you for your consideration, but I will never choose that solution."

"Yes, I gathered."

"I... I need them, Ms. Sawako. I need my friends. They mean more to me than I can say. If I ever lose them, I know I will never find such happiness and companionship again."

Sawako had to marvel a bit. Poor Tsumugi... how could someone so intelligent have so little self-knowledge?

There was nothing special about the light music club members. They were good kids, nothing more. And that was the point. Tsumugi loved them so much because they were _ordinary_ - a breath of real air in the pure-oxygen environment where she'd grown up. She would have found that same normality in any other club, and loved them just as much.

And that other club would have loved her right back... because how could they not?

"I should go," she said, patting Tsumugi's shoulder. "I don't think I'm helping."

The student nodded. She gently pushed Sawako's hand away. "I'm sorry. I'm not ready. Being reminded that you care about me on _other_ levels makes me feel the absence of the level I wanted."

"I know."

"I will recover in time. We will be as we were again..."

"But not yet," said Sawako. "I understand."

She got up to leave. "By the way," she added, "those friends you care so much about are worried too. You should call them."

"Perhaps I will."

She smiled. "And do something about that hair. It's too beautiful to leave in a tangle."

Sawako opened the door to find a maid waiting suspiciously close by. She decided not to say anything, but gave a mild scolding glance. The maid blushed and led her back out the way she'd come.

_That's one mess attended to,_ she thought. _Now I can get back to my own. Let's see... I have what, two hours left till Armageddon?_

They were stopped by the butler. "Pardon me," he said to Sawako, "but the master requests your presence."

"The master? But I just saw -"

"I refer to _Mister_ Kotobuki."

_Uh oh._ "Did he say what it was about?"

"His daughter."

Sawako gulped. Armageddon might be arriving slightly ahead of schedule.

* * *

There was a very quiet, very timid knock at Tsumugi's door.

"Come in," she said.

A young maid - middle-school age, in fact - carefully opened the door and stepped inside. "Milady?" she said. "Please don't be mad..."

"I'm not mad."

"I know you said you didn't want to see me today, but I've just been so worried. I just _had_ to see - wait, you're not?"

"No. I changed my mind."

Tears came to the maid's eyes. "Milady..." Tsumugi opened her arms, and the maid came in for a hug.

"I'm sorry, Sumire. It wasn't about you. I just didn't want you to see me at my worst like this."

"A-are you ready to tell -"

"No. I'm sorry, but this... this is a true secret, one that's only for me." She gently broke the hug. "Someday... if a day ever comes when I can look back on this and smile, I promise I will tell you everything."

"But milady, to see you suffer alone... it just... it b-breaks my heart..."

"Please don't cry, Sumire. There are still ways you can help."

She jerked upright. "There are? Wonderful! Tell me, tell me!"

Tsumugi smiled. "To begin with... please fetch the scissors."

* * *

Ui hadn't been part of the "freedom" procession, but she'd heard about it from friends. She was glad Yui was so excited (not to mention distracted from the topic of Matsuo). For Ui, this return to normal was more bittersweet. She was happy to be back with her friends, but she'd been enjoying the more challenging material of second year... and needless to say, spending all day with her sister had been paradise.

Ah well. Time to get moving before lunchtime ende-

_"...know what you must be saying to yourselves."_

What was that?

_"If that's the way she feels about it, then why doesn't she just end it all?"_

How odd! Ui was alone in the hallway. Where was that voice coming from?

_"Oh no, not me. I'm not ready for the final disappointment."_

It was almost too quiet to hear. She kept listening and turned her head in all directions, but the voice just wasn't loud enough for her to tell where the speaker was.

Then Ui realized something. There was only one room close enough to be the source of the sound - one of the "disabled washrooms".

_"I know what I'll be saying to myself..."_

Ui silently approached the door.

_"Is that all there is?"_

The voice had started singing! Ui very carefully turned the doorknob.

_"If that's all there is, my friends, then let's keep dancing..."_

Was that -?

Ui had to know. She opened the door. There was nothing inside but mops, cleaning supplies... and Azusa.

"Uh, hi," said Ui as her friend turned bright red. "I -"

Azusa shoved the door fully open, ran past her, and disappeared down the hallway.

Ui stared after her friend, feeling a bit bad about embarrassing her... but it hadn't exactly been her fault. She wondered if Azusa was aware of the flaw in her escape plan.

A few minutes later, the two of them were sitting side by side in class. The red colour had yet to fade from Azusa's face. Several times, she turned and opened her mouth to say something, then closed it again and turned back.

Finally she managed to say, "Whatever you heard, it was NOT a solo."

"Oh, should I have heard something?" said Ui, looking perfectly sincere. "I just forgot it wasn't a real washroom."

Azusa sighed with relief and focused on her notebook.

Ui smiled. Blindness was her sister's department, but she could be deaf if need be.

* * *

There was no time to prepare herself. The butler led her directly to an enormous office. Inside, behind a desk, was Mr. Kotobuki... with _Mrs._ Kotobuki at his side.

Sawako gulped again. She wasn't just in trouble, she was outnumbered.

"Have a seat," said the businessman, indicating a leather chair worth more than Sawako's whole apartment.

She did. "P-pleased to meet you both."

"Likewise. We've wanted to meet the famous Ms. Sawako for some time."

"Famous?"

"Tsumugi is always talking about that club advisor of hers," said Mrs. Kotobuki, smiling. "She adores you."

"That's... very nice." _Please,_ thought Sawako. _Please, please, please don't let them know just how true that is._

Mr. Kotobuki continued, "We are grateful to you for all you've done to encourage Tsumugi's interest in music. Thank you for coming to check on her today as well."

"N-no problem!"

"We thought while you were here, you might be able to help us sort something out..."

"Sure! What is it?"

"A certain incident that took place two days ago."

Sawako's heart dropped fifty stories. She was still doomed. The praise had lulled her into a false sense of security.

"Tsumugi was at school late for a band practice," Mr. Kotobuki began. "Then something unusual happened. One of my employees reported carrying out an order... one that I had never given him. I tracked the order back and learned that it had originated with my daughter."

"W-what order was that?"

"To arrange for the cancellation, at a specific time, of all the credit cards of one Tetsuo Tsukamoto."

Sawako's eyes widened. _Tsumugi_ had done that? Tsumugi _could_ do that?

"Upon further research, I determined that the man in question was dining out with you at the time. I take it he was unable to pay."

"Yes. Yes, that happened."

"Can you give us any idea what all this was about?"

She certainly could... the question was whether she _should_. After a moment's thought, however, Sawako realized this part of the story was safe to tell. And although she didn't feel like sharing something so personal and shameful, doing so might be a good idea for that very reason. No one would make up such an embarrassing experience. Telling them would be worth -

Sawako nearly laughed out loud. It would be worth _sympathy points_, that's what. This was her gimmick.

She steeled herself and said, "Tetsuo was my boyfriend. He was also a liar and a fake. Tsumugi tried to warn me... I wouldn't listen."

Both parents raised their eyebrows.

In as much detail as she could bear to provide, Sawako told the story. She explained how Tsumugi had known the truth, how she'd proposed to him anyway (leaving out the part about quitting the club), how he'd rejected her - and how he'd given himself away. The parents listened as closely as if it were some tense drama episode.

"How could Tsumugi have known you would see that tag, much less recognize it?" Mr. Kotobuki asked.

"She probably didn't," said Sawako. "She must have been counting on the card rejection itself to raise my suspicions. It did, too. I might have missed that detail otherwise."

"Well... I am not pleased that she took such an action, but I can understand her motives now. You should be more careful in the future."

"And you should be forever grateful for such devoted friendship," added Mrs. Kotobuki.

Sawako smiled. "Believe me, I am."

She began to get up so she could bow and take her leave - but Mr. Kotobuki gestured for her to stop. "That was the first part of the incident. There was a second."

Slowly, the teacher sat back down. She'd been a fool to hope.

Mrs. Kotobuki took the lead now. "Tsumugi had told us her practice would run late," she said, "but not nearly as late as it actually did. I waited for her until well after midnight. When she finally returned, she took the back entrance to avoid me - I didn't realize she was home until the chauffeur came back from the garage.

"Tsumugi had gone to her room and locked the door. I knocked and called to her, but she refused to answer. I had to wake the butler and have him fetch the master key. By the time I finally got inside and saw Tsumugi... she had cried herself to sleep."

Sawako's heart broke for Tsumugi all over again. She'd known what must have happened, but that didn't make it any easier to hear.

"In the morning, Tsumugi appeared to be fine again. She wouldn't tell us anything about it, and she still won't. But the _chauffeur_ did have a few details for us."

"O-oh?"

"He picked up Tsumugi at ten o'clock. Rather than going home, she gave him quite unusual instructions. He was to bring her to various bars, most of them near the school. At each one, she went inside and came back out a few minutes later. After an hour of this, she signaled him to come inside... and help her _carry you out_."

Sawako went pale.

"They drove you home. He waited while Tsumugi helped you inside. She had warned him that she might be several hours, but she returned only half an hour later. From that point on, she was different. She spoke only to tell him where to go, and she wouldn't let him see her face. She was also holding an object she hadn't brought inside with her."

"...An object?"

"He didn't recognize it, but I found it next to her in bed later. It was a _stomach pouch_."

In a tiny voice, Sawako said, "Uh, that's... that was..."

"It was nothing we hadn't suspected," said Mr. Kotobuki. "She was gaining weight rapidly while eating no more than usual."

When Sawako realized the implication of that statement, her horror grew. Tsumugi had been keeping up her gimmick _at home_?

"When I told her I had seen it," Mrs. Kotobuki continued, "she could no longer deny it existed. Nonethless, all she would tell us was that she was doing something special for the light music club."

"Can you elaborate?" asked Mr. Kotobuki.

Sawako fought to clear her panic. If Tsumugi had been this tightlipped, she might still have a chance. "The pouch was part of her costume for the performance. We were experimenting with different sizes over the course of the month. I _didn't_ tell her to wear it at home."

"Then why did she do so?"

"Maybe she wanted to get comfortable with it?" Sawako suggested. It wasn't much of a theory, but it definitely beat "She thought of it as a _baby I impregnated her with_."

"Hmm," said Mr. Kotobuki. "What sort of costume was this?"

"Uh... well, we had an _Alice in Wonderland_ theme. I didn't want any jealousy, so they were all Alice, just different aspects."

"I... see. But what 'aspect' was Tsumugi?"

Sawako's mind raced. How was she going to justify giving Alice a "fat side"? Did she even eat in the book? There was a tea party, but - wait! Of course! "She was the _big_ Alice!"

"Hm?"

"Remember when Alice ate that cake that said 'EAT ME' and grew really big? That's what Tsumugi represented. I couldn't make her any _taller_, so I had to go with other dimensions."

The parents exchanged a look.

"The idea seemed better in my head," Sawako granted.

"No no, it's... creative," said Mr. Kotobuki.

"We are getting off topic," his wife reminded him. "Ms. Sawako, it is clear enough why you were drinking, and we can now assume Tsumugi predicted the whole scenario. I even understand why she went to so much trouble to find you herself. She knew you might need help, and children tend not to realize adults have their own friends to help them. But there is one question remaining.

"What took place in your apartment that left Tsumugi so upset? _What happened between you?_"

There, at last, was the question Sawako had been dreading. But she was finally ready. She'd had just enough time to figure out what she had to say - the one thing that just might get her out of this room alive. And it had the extra benefit of being true.

"I'm sorry," she said. "We talked, but I can't tell you what it was about. It's not my secret to tell."

Mrs. Kotobuki pursed her lips. Her husband scowled.

"You have my word that she's not in danger," Sawako quickly added. "I would have told you right away in that case. This was just something very... personal."

"Too personal to tell her own parents?" said Mr. Kotobuki.

"Is that so hard to imagine? How did you feel about talking to your parents when you were her age?"

Mr. Kotobuki looked unconvinced... but slowly, reluctantly, Mrs. Kotobuki nodded. She couldn't deny having felt like that once. A girl needed her privacy.

"Tsumugi trusted me, and I won't betray her," Sawako concluded. "If you want to know what we talked about, I'm afraid you'll have to get it from her. Otherwise, please just take my word that she'll be all right."

Mr. Kotobuki looked at his wife, then back to Sawako. "I suppose we have no choice. Thank you, Ms. Sawako."

"And you," said the teacher, standing up. "Let's continue doing our best for Tsumugi."

"Indeed." He stood too, and they bowed to each other.

Sawako turned to bow to Mrs. Kotobuki as well, but she had moved. She was now on Sawako's side of the desk - right in front of her.

"One more time, from the bottom of my heart, I wish to thank you," she said.

"Oh, I'm just doing my job."

"No," said Mrs. Kotobuki, putting a hand on Sawako's upper arm. "You are truly a fine teacher and role model for my daughter. You provide her with a daily example of proper femininity and professionalism."

The hand squeezed. Hard enough to hurt. Hard enough to cut off Sawako's circulation.

"I trust. You will continue. To show. _Proper. Femininity. And. __**Professionalism.**_"

"I will! Of course I will!" said Sawako.

"Good," said Mrs. Kotobuki, releasing her and stepping back. "This has been a pleasure."

"L-likewise," said Sawako as they bowed to each other.

Barely registering Mr. Kotobuki's very confused look at his wife, Sawako turned and walked out. She met the butler again and he escorted her out of the building. It took several minutes to get to her car. She thanked him, got in, drove off...

...and parked a block away. Now, at last, she let her mask drop. She shuddered as violently as if she'd just stepped out into an Alaskan blizzard. Her head dropped right into the steering wheel.

So _that_ was what it felt like to be warned off by a girl's parents. In a million years, Sawako had never expected to be on this end of it.

Clearly Mrs. Kotobuki had a bit more insight into this situation than her husband. (And thank heaven for that - Sawako had a feeling _his_ reaction would have made hers look like a picnic.) She must have realized Sawako had _rejected_ Tsumugi, but even so, she'd felt the need to put the fear of God in her. After all, what if Sawako changed her mind?

The message was now well and truly received. No playing with Tsumugi, no matter what she said. Hands off.

And in the midst of her panic... deep, deep down... Sawako was glad a higher authority had taken the option away once and for all.

Oh, she hadn't been lying earlier. Sawako was straight. As straight as they come. She had no interest in women whatsoever.

But if _anyone_ had ever tempted her to make an exception... Tsumugi... with that smile, and that personality, and that body, and that _money_...

Sawako shook herself. This was not a thing to think about. She started the car again and headed back for Sakuragaoka.

She'd dealt with her disciple. Time to face her master.

* * *

"Ui said Azu-nyan may be a bit late today," said Yui, taking her seat at the table. "Something about needing to collect herself."

"She can _have_ herself," said Ritsu, still annoyed from earlier. "I have no interest in collecting any."

"What do we do until then?" asked Mio. She had already started the kettle up.

Ritsu shrugged. "Read the article? I don't really feel like waitin' for Nakano anymore."

"Don't be so hard on her," said Mio.

"Figures you'd take her si-"

"I'm not! You heard my song yesterday. I don't think we're bad people for not being workaholics. But I don't think we're perfect either."

"We're future perfect," said Yui. "We'll be perfect in the future."

"Anyway, you know it's hard for Azusa right now. After the whole thing with -"

There was a knock at the door.

"It's unlocked," said Ritsu. "Wait, it's always unlocked. Who comes here and knocks?"

There was no answer, verbal or otherwise. The door remained closed.

"Nodoka?" asked Mio. "Is that you?"

No answer.

Ritsu sighed and got up. "If that Occult Club is pranking us again, there are gonna be consequences."

"We don't know for sure it was them the first time," said Mio, following.

"But they're never in their clubroom," said Yui. "That means they're out pranking!"

Ritsu opened the door. On the other side was...

She sighed. "Get up, Jun."

"You too? Maybe I'm overdoing it. Isn't this how to make a serious apology?"

"Oh yeah, totally. Here in the Edo period we do that all the time. What's that in your hands?"

"A nickel. Please accept it in restitution."

Yui muttered to Mio, "Maybe she _does_ think this is the Edo period. That's the last time a nickel was worth anything."

"Get up already," said Ritsu, taking the coin. "We forgive ya."

"Y-you do?"

"If it'll get your face off the ground."

She got up. "I'm so sorry. I never - where's Azusa?"

"Not here yet," said Mio. "Jun, why did you do it?"

"I thought our clubs were rivals. I only meant to... well... you know, I'm not even sure. I didn't think ahead."

"Nobody really did this month," said Ritsu. "I'm not sure some of us know how. Even Sawa-chan mostly gets by on showmanship."

Mio rolled her eyes. _She_ could think ahead. Well... when stress wasn't making her crazy, anyway.

"We've been talking this over," Ritsu said. "Answer us two questions. One, did you learn anything?"

"Yeah. Lots of things. _Too many_ things."

"And two - honest, now - didja have fun with us?"

It took a moment to happen, but finally a smile broke through Jun's embarrassment and shame. "Yeah. It _was_ fun."

"Then as club president, I hereby absolve you of your sins, in the name of the Father and of -"

"Ritsu!" said Mio.

"Sorry. Anyway, you're going back to the jazz club, right?"

"Yep."

"Then go in peace, and never darken our doorstep again, ya lousy Mata Hari." Ritsu winked. "We'll pretend none of this ever happened."

"Thanks, senior. But can I wait here until -"

"Nope!" said Yui. "Look behind you."

Jun turned... and then held very still. To her left, equally motionless, was Azusa. The junior students stared at each other in silence.

"We'll give you the room for a minute," said Mio. "Come on, guys." She headed out and down the stairs, followed by Ritsu and Yui (who, while sympathetic, nonethless had to be dragged away from her tea).

After a long moment, Jun and Azusa stepped inside and closed the door behind them.

* * *

With Yui, Azusa, and Jun doing their own things today, Ui had a rare opportunity to walk home with Nodoka. The two of them were busy catching up when, on their way through the school gate, something unexpected happened.

"Ui! Hey, Ui! Over here!"

The girls turned. There was a boy there in a different school's uniform. Nodoka didn't recognize him, but Ui seemed to. "Matsuo?"

"Hi."

Nodoka puzzled. Matsuo... Matsuo... oh! "You're the boy that Yui kept talking about."

"...Yeah," he said, looking awkward.

_As well you should,_ Nodoka thought. "She also said you were very cruel to -"

"No, wait!" Ui interrupted. "I made him do that. It was for Yui's own good."

Nodoka's eyebrows rose. She knew Yui needed a firm hand sometimes, but even so, hearing those words from a _little_ sister felt wrong.

"Let me introduce you. Nodoka, this is Matsuo Otoko. Matsuo, this is Nodoka Manabe, a dear friend of my sister's and mine."

They awkwardly traded bows.

"I'm afraid Yui will be with her club for a while," said Ui. "You shouldn't wait for her today." Nodoka agreed - he was probably making the first-years nervous.

"Uh, right," he said.

Ui looked concerned. "I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but are you sure you should talk to her at all? I know it's hard leaving someone with a bad impression of you, but it's too soon to -"

"No. That's okay. It's not Yui I came to talk to."

"Oh!" Ui blinked. "Um... is it Nodoka?"

The three of them took about the same length of time to realize how silly that was. They chuckled together.

"No, it's you," Matsuo said. "This just... it was really bothering me. Yui has to hate me, I get that, but I had to be sure you don't."

Ui smiled warmly. "How could I ever hate someone who tried so hard not to hurt my big sister?"

He smiled, but still looked uneasy. "The thing is... it's not that I don't _like_ her..."

"I know, you explained before. She's not your type."

"Right! I can tell there are lots of good things about her. She's enthusiastic, lively, talkative..."

Ui nodded. Nodoka rolled her eyes - clearly Matsuo had only seen half of Yui's behaviour. She was quite content to laze around the house in between frenzies of excitement. Then again, Nodoka supposed, she approached _that_ activity with the same determination. A Yui at rest, just like a Yui in motion, tended to stay that way.

"But it's like that girl she saw me with before. I like her too! They're great, she and Yui both, but they're just kind of... how can I put this..."

_Or maybe WHY can you put this,_ thought Nodoka. She didn't want to be uncharitable, but Matsuo had now done what he'd come here to do, right? Why was he still talking?

"They're _pushy_," he said. "They have their plans and the rest of us have to keep up. It's exhausting."

"I understand," said Ui. "We all have our personal preferences."

"Yeah, I do," Matsuo said, looking up at her. "I really do. I like the strong silent type. A girl who lets me get a word in edgewise. Someone who has her own life, but likes sharing in others' lives too."

Nodoka blinked. This was starting to sound pretty specific.

"A girl who doesn't show off, but anyone can see she's _really_ smart and caring. One who wants the best even for someone she's just met. A girl who... who's just so beautiful..."

Matsuo suddenly pulled Ui in and kissed her.

Nodoka's eyes went huge. Her glasses slipped off her nose and fell to the ground.

The kiss lasted for several seconds. It was Matsuo who broke it. He drew a few inches back and looked deep in Ui's eyes.

"It's just not _fair_."

He let go of Ui and ran away. By the time Nodoka had her glasses back on, he was gone.

For about 25 seconds, Ui was as perfectly still as a statue.

"Um, are you..."

"NODOKA!" Ui suddenly came alive and grabbed her friend's shoulders. "Nodoka! Nodoka! Nodokanodokanodoka!"

"I can hear you!" What did this reaction mean? There were so many emotions on Ui's face that Nodoka couldn't pick one out.

"_Nodoka!_ This is so important!"

"Yes, it -"

"You can't tell her!"

"What?"

"Big sister! You can't tell her, Nodoka! She can never know I had my first kiss before she did! Never! NEVER EVER!"

Nodoka couldn't believe it. "_That's_ your first thought after -"

"_Promise me!_"

"Okay! I promise!"

Ui sighed with relief and let her go. Nodoka guided her to a nearby bench where they could sit down.

There was suddenly so much to talk about that Nodoka didn't know where to begin... but it didn't matter. Ui was just sitting there staring at nothing. Her eyes were twitching rapidly, as if she were solving some incredibly complicated math problem in her head. Nodoka sighed; she'd be getting home late tonight.

She was happy for Ui (assuming Ui herself was happy - it was still too early to tell). But she had to wonder... was there some reason _her_ life was never this dramatic?

* * *

"My mouth feels funny," said Yui.

"Somethin' you ate?" Ritsu suggested.

"No, it's like... well, never mind. What do we do now?"

"Read the article?"

Mio shook her head. "Azusa's here now. She won't be that long with Jun."

"Yeah, okay. We'll wait."

They waited for several minutes.

"I wonder if Sawa-chan's meeting has started," said Yui.

"Oh, right! We should..." Mio trailed off.

"Exactly," said Ritsu. "We've got nothin'. The nearest temple is too far away and time travel is too hard."

There was silence.

"Hangman?" the drummer suggested.

"I don't have any paper," said Yui.

"Me neither," said Mio. "My bag is in the clubroom."

A few more minutes passed.

"Oh, screw it," said Mio, pulling out her phone. "Let's read the article."

* * *

Sawako couldn't quite believe what she was seeing.

School had been out for twenty minutes. All the other teachers had gone home. Aside from a few club meetings that were taking place, the whole school was empty.

And that sign was _still_ on the principal's door.

Sawako would've been grateful for the extra time... if she'd known she was getting it! In this situation, where the principal could come out at any minute, she had to be on alert. It was impossible to do anything useful like work on her speech. (That was the best plan, she'd decided - open with a big speech so she could choose what order to discuss things in.)

She sighed and, for the third time, started pacing. What was his _problem_? Why did he always have to mess up her timing? Surely -

"Sawako? Where are you going?"

Of course! Of _course_ he'd finally come out of his office when she was walking the other way! "Just pacing, sir."

"Ah. Come on in."

She followed him, mentally struggling to reassemble her speech. She had no chance to use it, however. As soon as she sat down, the principal extended his hand and said, "Congratulations."

Although startled, she reflexively shook hands. "You mean for the prize?"

"For proving me wrong. I should have trusted you to begin with."

"O-oh."

"I was foolish to let circumstantial evidence convince me you were neglecting your duties as club advisor. You were never the problem. Your _students_ were."

Sawako's eyes went wide.

"Your club is a remarkably lazy and shiftless group of children. They made it clear with the song they played at Regionals - a desperate attempt at denial. You tried to tell me when all this began, but I didn't listen. I apologize."

"Th-that's -"

"Your job is safe, of course. I can hardly punish you for being unable to control such delinquents; on the contrary, I'm pleased with you for trying. They are the problem, and from now on they will be dealt with much more severely."

Only a moment passed while Sawako made the decision, but in her mind, it was an eternity.

"Sir," she said... "I'm _so_ glad someone finally understands!"

* * *

"You weren't in class."

"I... wasn't ready."

So far, this was about as deep as Azusa and Jun's conversation had gotten. The awkwardness between them had been too great for either of them to make a real first move. They'd done little more than exchange trivialities.

Finally, Jun asked Azusa, "When did you find out?"

"Something seemed weird the whole time," she said. "But I didn't know for sure until you forgot your phone."

"What was suspicious about - oh! _Oh!_ You read my messages, didn't you?"

"Well, excuse _me!_ They were showing when I looked at it! Whose fault was that?"

Strangely enough, this broke the ice. The two girls half-talked, half-argued, going over each detail of the past month that either of them had been wondering about. Azusa was careful not to give away the existence of gimmicks, which wasn't just her secret, but otherwise they were completely truthful with each other. They were at it for a good 25 minutes, by which time they were both in a better mood.

"Tanning! How did I not think of that?" asked Jun. "My best guess was that you were drinking too much chocolate milk!"

"That wouldn't do it. Believe me, I tried."

"I never knew you were so _vain_. Come on, who needs a tan?"

"Who needs non-frizzy hair?"

"Touche."

They both laughed. Azusa leaned back against the wall. "I really missed this."

"Yeah. Me too."

"Why, Jun? Why did you have to be such a... a _bonehead_ this month?"

Without meaning to, Azusa had brought a bit of the serious atmosphere back. Jun looked down. "It was just something small that turned into something big. I had ideas about how it would end, but not how to get there. I didn't think it would be so hard."

"You didn't think you'd like us so much," said Azusa.

"Well, _you_ I knew. But the others... yeah. I couldn't break away from the act. It was too much fun."

"I know the feeling," said Azusa. "Too bad fun is _all_ it is."

"What else should it be?"

"This is a school club, Jun! It's supposed to be serious! We're supposed to be improving ourselves, and I'm the only one who's really trying!"

Jun could tell the anger in the guitarist's face wasn't meant for her. "What's this about, Azusa?"

"I'm... I'm thinking about quitting."

"C'mon."

"I'm serious! What do I get from this club besides a headache? What am I learning here?"

Jun just stared.

"Well?"

"I'm waiting for the punchline."

"I'm serious!"

"I know. But if you could hear the way you talk about this club, you'd be waiting for the punchline too."

"The way I... what?"

"You talk to me and Ui every day about this club. Sometimes you're happy, and sometimes you complain... but it's the same way you complain about your parents. Not like you're a 'member' who could leave any time... like you're family. Meant for each other."

"Well - well maybe I've been wrong about that! _You_ were wrong all month! Why should I listen to you?"

"It's your life," Jun agreed. "I just can't believe you're considering this. I'm _really_ sure it wouldn't make you happy."

"Maybe I'm not supposed to be. Maybe I'll be unhappy either way. But if I belong here, why am I so different from them? Why do I feel like they were fine before I came along, and I'm just... extra?"

"No, you're -"

"I _am_, Jun!" Tears were in Azusa's eyes. "They don't need me! I'm not even the only guitarist! All they want is to have fun, and I'm just a... a drag! A wet blanket!"

"Maybe that's the whole reason they need you."

Azusa looked up at Jun.

"Did that sound deep?" said the bassist. "Heh, good one, me. But look, every group needs somebody serious, right? Somebody to keep them on course? You really think Sawa-chan cares about that? You think Mio is determined enough to do it alone?"

"But I'm just a..."

"A junior, yeah. So they have to set an example for you!"

Azusa narrowed her eyes. "_This_ is them setting an example?"

"I didn't say they were good at it. But you make them try."

There was silence for a minute.

"I don't know," said Azusa. "I don't know if I can handle this. I don't know if I can even be friends with _you_ again yet."

"Yeah, I know. I'll just... I'll be around. Okay?"

"Okay. Thanks, Jun."

If Ui had been there, they might have hugged. But it was just the two of them, without her balancing presence. There was still too much between them right now to be smoothed over. For a moment, they made tentative motions; then they just nodded to each other, and Jun turned to go.

"One last question," said Azusa.

"Sure."

"Why was I Target Zero?"

Jun looked surprised. "Because zero comes first."

As her friend turned back around, Azusa found it impossible to keep a smile off her face.

* * *

For about a minute after Mio, Ritsu, and Yui read the article, not a word was spoken.

"Well," said the drummer, "that was... different."

"Maybe this is the wrong article," said Yui.

"No, it's got our names. This is definitely it."

"What do you think Sawa-chan will say?"

"Hooooo boy, I don't wanna think about it. We'd better not even show her. Whatta you think, Mio?"

Mio didn't answer. She was just staring.

"Oh no you don't," said Ritsu, snapping a finger in front of her face. "You are _not_ going all Mio on us again."

The bassist glared. "No, I was just... disturbed for a second. Don't use my name like that!"

"Why not? It's shorter than 'catatonic over nothing'."

"Nothing, huh? You just don't take anything seriously! You're really _Ritsu_ that way!"

Yui asked, "Can I be -"

"This is a straightforward fight," said Ritsu. "Don't Yui it up."

"Oo!" said a voice. "What am I?"

Everyone turned. It was -

"Mugi!" said Yui. "You're here!"

Beaming, their rich friend reached out for them, and everyone joined in a group hug. They had all seen her yesterday, but their worry had made it feel like a long time. And it really had been a long time since they'd seen her like _this_.

"Notice anything different?" she asked when they separated.

"Of course!" said Mio. "You're back to normal!"

"We can finally see your belly button again!" Yui agreed. "If you lift your shirt."

Tsumugi looked slightly hurt. "I didn't mean _that_."

"Uh... new haircut?" said Ritsu.

"Yes! I knew _you_ would notice, Ricchan!" She hugged the drummer again.

"Is... is that new?" Mio asked. It was a reasonable question. Her hair looked the same as ever.

"Of course it is! It's short!"

"It is?"

"Look!" Tsumugi held up a handful of her hair. "It's a whole four inches shorter!"

"...Mugi, your hair is three feet long."

"Well, Ritsu noticed." She stuck her tongue out, then giggled at having done so.

Mio glared at Ritsu, who mouthed the words "Wild guess."

"So why are you all standing here at the stairs?"

"Room's in use," said Ritsu. "Azusa and Jun are hashing it out."

Tsumugi's eyes lit up. "Well, what are we waiting for?"

She ran up the stairs. The others shared a look, then followed. By the time they got there, she already had her ear to the door.

"No good," she said. "Does anyone have a cup?"

"Mine is inside," said Yui. "I'll go get it." Mio grabbed her arm and gave her a scolding glance.

"Then we'll just have to look!" Tsumugi very slowly turned the doorknob.

"What exactly do you think is happening in there?" asked Ritsu.

"Bonding!" She silently opened the door a crack.

"Well, don't bother _them_ over it. Mio and I can fight over something and then make up. We do it like once a week."

Mio was about to complain, but then everyone heard Jun's voice dangerously close to the door. "Run!"

They had just barely made it back to the bottom of the stairs when Jun stepped through the door. Then she turned back and looked at it funny. "Wasn't this shut?"

"Gremlins," said Ritsu as they passed her on their way back up.

"Hey, senior!" Jun said to Tsumugi. "You're ba- AAAA! What happened to you?"

"I am on an excellent diet," the heiress said without missing a beat.

"Oh. Wow! Talk about fast!"

"Talk about _dumb_," Ritsu whispered to Mio.

"Senior, I'm really sorry I -"

"It's all right," said Tsumugi. "Will you be staying in the club?"

"No, we all agreed it's best if I'm not a member anymo-"

"Shh," said Ritsu. "You were never a member in the first place, remember?"

"Oh yeah. Um, see you later, people from some other club I was never in!" Jun hurried down the stairs.

"Wait!" said Tsumugi, still looking confused. "Wouldn't that mean you never got your hair cut?"

"Right! It's still long! It just looks short!"

Yui looked back and forth from Tsumugi to the disappearing Jun and remarked, "Hair is weird today."

* * *

"They're terrible! Just terrible! Especially Ritsu! I don't have the words to describe how awful they..."

The principal waited.

"They... are..."

She couldn't continue. These words tasted foul in her mouth. Sawako had done a lot of lying to a lot of people, and it always felt wrong, but today it felt uncomfortable. Unpleasant. _Worse_ than telling the truth.

Over the last two days, Sawako had looked deep into her own soul and hated what she'd seen. She couldn't just forget about it now. She had to change.

"No," she told the principal. "I can't do this."

"Do what?"

Sawako took one last, deep breath as a teacher at Sakuragaoka. "I'm sorry, sir. You were right the first time. The students are only part of the problem. The other part is me."

His eyes narrowed. "Explain."

"I'm a bigger slacker than any of the club members. I'm usually not even there when they practice. When _I_ go to the music room, it's for snacks and tea. I let them take the lead when it comes to club activities; I would certainly never have pushed them into Regionals on my own. I let them take it easy because I want to take it easy too."

As strange as it was under the circumstances, Sawako felt a weight lift off her. There were people who knew her true personality, but she had never come out and _told_ someone before. If this was how Catholics felt after confessing their sins, Sawako could see the appeal. But she'd confessed to her boss, and the consequences would be much bigger than a few extra Hail Marys.

"I see." The principal's face was neutral.

"There's just one thing I have to say in my defense," Sawako continued. She had been thinking all day, and this was the only half-decent strategy she'd come up with. "I can have more than one reason."

"Hmm?"

"A month ago, I told you the girls had natural talent. I said I had never put them on a strict schedule because it might wreck their enthusiasm, not make them better players. That was the truth. Now today, I'm telling you I never came down hard on them because I preferred to take it easy myself. That's _also_ the truth.

"There are two reasons. I'm not proud of the second one. All I'm asking is that you don't ignore the first. I'm not the teacher I should be, but I still _am_ a teacher. I've never wanted less than the best for my students. I'm just... not there yet."

"This is your final answer, then?" asked the principal. "You won't be switching stories again?"

"No," she said. "That's the truth."

Sawako gripped the arms of her chair and wai-

"That was close," said the principal.

"...What?"

"It's a good thing you changed your mind. For a few seconds there, you were fired."

Sawako's jaw hit the floor. "This was a _test_?!"

"Yes."

"You don't really blame the kids for everything?"

"No. I didn't really expect them to win at Regionals either."

"WHAT?"

The principal smiled. "Oh, I _hoped_ they might, of course. But it wasn't likely. This was their first competition of any sort, wasn't it?"

Sawako rested her head on one hand, taking all this in. "Okay, so... why tell me they had to? And why lie now?"

"I wanted two things from you, Sawako. First, I wanted evidence that your club was not simply taking up space. You can hardly blame me for getting that impression, given the behaviour I saw a month ago."

"Right..."

"But on that day, I saw even worse behaviour from _you_. You lied over and over, blaming everyone but yourself. I won't tolerate that from one of my teachers. However, since you were clearly in a panic, I decided to give you another chance."

"And that was today?"

"Correct. I judged it likely that your students would lose; the test was whether you would put all the blame on them once again. You passed."

Sawako raised an eyebrow. "So you lied to me to teach me honesty?"

"No, not honesty. _Responsibility._ Your students look to you for an example. If they see you dodging and scheming, they will learn to do the same."

_I'm hearing this setting-an-example thing a lot today,_ Sawako thought. "Do you really think I'm that... influential?"

"Certainly. If I seem demanding, Sawako, it is only because you have chosen the most important of all careers. The future of Japan is in your hands every day. It's time you began taking that seriously."

As Sawako paused, unsure what to say, he added, "We have a position for a homeroom teacher opening up next year. You could start there."

She was startled. "You nearly fired me, and now you're offering me a promotion?"

"Not offering, no. You still have to apply."

"But if I was bad enough to fire a minute ago -"

"This was never about your _ability_. By all accounts, you are a fine teacher. The problem is your attitude, and I now believe you are prepared to work on it." He paused ominously. "That belief _will_ be subject to revision."

"U-understood," said Sawako.

"Good. That will be all."

She got up, bowed to the principal, headed for the door... and stopped halfway.

Her honesty had been rewarded, but it was only half-honesty. There were still six big lies hanging in the air: the gimmicks. And although Sawako had decidedly mixed feelings about her boss right now, what with the trick he'd pulled, she still didn't feel right about leaving things this way. Not only was it dangerous (she would be history if he ever _did_ find out), that foul taste in her mouth was back.

Cursing her conscience, and herself for listening to it, she turned around and said, "There's one more thing I have to tell you. The club members -"

He held up a hand. "Stop there."

"Yes?"

"What you're going to tell me - does it involve any immediate threat to anyone's well-being?"

"No..."

"Then let it be. I am content with where things stand now."

Sawako raised both eyebrows. "Really?"

"I intend this meeting to be a fresh start for you. I'm sure your attitude problem has led you to make other mistakes, and I'm willing to leave them in the past. But if you _tell_ me about them, I will have no choice but to punish you."

"Oh."

"Let's avoid that. I'll see you on Monday."

It was the best of both worlds. Sawako had _tried_ to confess and the principal had outright told her it was okay. Part of her brain was trying to remind her that this might be yet another test, but it was drowned out by the rest of her brain shouting _Don't look a gift horse in the mouth._ She bowed again and left before he could change his mind.

As soon as she was outside the teachers' offices, she felt different. The farther she got, the more it sank in.

_It's over._

Her whole body felt lighter. Her steps quickened.

_This hellish, godforsaken month is over. I got through it. The world hit me with everything it had, and I'm still on my feet._

The staircase to the music room was in sight. She didn't make it - the rush of emotion was so overwhelming she tripped. It didn't hurt a bit. Getting to her knees, Sawako raised her fists to the sky and screamed:

"FREEDOM!"

* * *

Now alone in his office, the principal smiled. Sawako was right. It was possible to have more than one reason for one's actions.

He himself, for example, had told Sawako not to make whatever damning confession had been on her lips. It was time to start fresh, he had told her. And that was true.

Now, perhaps it was _also_ true that schools with no disabled students find it difficult to get grants to bring them up to code. The grants always go to schools with a pressing need. The sort of pressing need illustrated, say, by an injured student struggling for a month to get her wheelchair around the school - forced to rely on friends carrying it for her (even if no one seemed to see this happen). Such a story might be highly useful to everyone... as long as it wasn't based on false pretenses.

He had also told Sawako she had passed the test and saved her job by being honest with him. And that was true.

It might _also_ be true, perhaps, that he had no desire to upset the Kotobuki family by firing their daughter's favourite teacher. That a firing offense for any other employee might be an occasion for... creativity where this one was concerned. Not to mention that regardless of his actions after finding out, a principal who had allowed a phony club to exist under his nose for a year and a half might not look good to parents and investors.

Yes, this multiple-reasons theory was worth exploring. Principal Yamada hoped Sawako got her act together, but he also hoped she never quite lost the cunning edge that she'd shown in defending herself. She was bound to need it now and then.

After all, there was a day and an hour for everything.

* * *

The light music club was now back at the dining table. Tsumugi was preparing a fresh pot of tea. The other members were enjoying various treats. Conversation topics ranged from local sports ("I once saw a middle-school baseball game where this girl hit the ball right into her own glasses!") to physics ("Oh come on, that's impossible") to ethics ("Are you calling me a liar?") to recent events ("Hey, why do you think Sawa-chan put those rainbows and pink triangles on Jun's costume?") Nobody, except possibly Azusa, was even thinking about playing a musical instrument.

God was in his heaven and all was right with the world.

But was that really so? Ritsu looked around at her friends, pondering. Just yesterday, Yui had been "dumped", Azusa had found out her friend was a traitor, and Mio had bombed almost as badly as on what Ritsu liked to call "P-Day". Honestly, the drummer didn't feel great herself. And Mugi! Whatever had happened to her, it had been serious, life-crushing stuff (and by now Ritsu had figured out about half of it, though it would be many years before she knew for sure). Bad enough to make her miss a day, which Tsumugi _never_ did.

Were they just fooling themselves acting okay again? Wasn't it too soon for that? The experiences of the past few days were the kind that some people take _years_ to recover from. What if they were making things worse, like a football player wrecking his leg by playing through an injury?

...Nah.

People had different ways of healing. Curling up in a ball and staying home for a week was just one approach. Without this club, maybe some of them would've done that. (Definitely Mio.) But now they had a better way - something that gave them real peace in body and soul.

This was after-school tea time. This was how they rolled.

A sigh interrupted Ritsu's contemplation. She looked to see who it was... as if she didn't already know. Now that Yui was cured of the mopes, there was only one real candidate: Azusa.

Yui noticed too. "What's the matter, Azu-nyan? Did I not hug you enough yet?"

"No! No, that's not it."

"Aw."

Ritsu smiled at Azusa. "Still hung up on our screwups, huh?"

She sighed again. "I'm sorry, senior. Don't pay attention to me... I know it's not my place. I just can't help it."

Normally Ritsu would be happy to leave it at that, but under the circumstances, she decided to throw Azusa a bone. "You _are_ allowed to speak your mind, y'know. I only object when you get all uppity about it."

"Really? Wait, how do I tell the difference?"

"Feel your face. If I haven't punched you in it, you're okay."

Azusa smiled at that, but just briefly. "Then... can I say the one thing that's really getting to me right now? You won't like it."

"Warning appreciated. Have at it."

She took a deep breath. "We need to return the prize."

Everyone was startled silent.

"I don't want to do it either! But how can we keep something we didn't win honestly? They gave it to us because they thought we were -"

Ritsu held up a hand. "Is _that_ all? Hang on a sec."

Azusa watched, puzzled, as the drummer took out her phone and pushed some buttons.

"Here ya go," she finally said, handing over the phone. "I think you'll feel a lot better when you read this."

"Oh, the article. How's this going to -"

"Reeeeead."

She did.

* * *

_CRAZY COSTUMES WIN BIG AT REGIONALS_

_Tokyo's biggest high school music competition, Regionals, has wrapped for another year. As usual, three prizes were awarded in each of the ten categories. Ryuumei Academy, a competitor in the pop/rock category, was not one of the winners - but they didn't go home empty-handed. Their performance earned them a special prize for outstanding effort._

_"Most bands in this category just wear their school uniforms and play something popular," explained Mr. Ito, one of the judges. "That's fine, of course - the competition is about skill and technique. But Ryuumei came to us this year with a whole different kind of performance. They had no shot at placing for a number of reasons, but their creativity deserved to be recognized."_

_Ryuumei's opening number, "Don't Say Lazy," was an original composition by the two founding members of the club. The song is a cry against Japanese student culture and its harsh, sometimes unfair expectations. While asserting the need for downtime, it also makes the important point (or "Red Point") that an apparent slacker may actually be a good student. This is done subtly with lines that include material learned in school, such as English phrases and facts about animal behaviour._

_The song, however, was just the first layer. Said Mr. Ito, "Ryuumei's overall theme was the frustration of adolescence. The music spoke directly to this, but they also used visual aids. They chose costumes based on _Alice in Wonderland_, the story of a girl thrust unexpectedly into a world she doesn't understand and isn't ready for. What could be a better metaphor for puberty?"_

_But there was still a third layer to the act. "The part that impressed us most," said Mr. Ito, "was something we found confusing at first. All five Ryuumei students seemed to be disadvantaged in some way. One was in a wheelchair, another had dark glasses and a cane, and so on. This made no sense - Regionals makes a point of accomodating disabled students, but Ryuumei hadn't registered any, much less a whole band full._

_"It took us a while to see what they were getting at. They were representing themselves as people on the margins of society - those who are casually judged and sold short. Most teenagers feel that way as well, but to an adult, who has long since lived through those frustrations, they often seem like mere foolishness. By taking on the appearance of those whose problems we cannot ignore, Ryuumei reminded us how we all felt in our high school days."_

_"We just wish they had been able to finish their set," said Mr. Ito, referring to the lead singer's collapse after the first song ended. "Who knows what other surprises were in store?"_

_The Ryuumei Academy light music club consists of five members. Their president and drummer, Ritsu 'R.T.' Tainaka, is also head of the student council and holds several interscholastic track and field records. "Music is my first love," the wheelchair-bound R.T. told us, "but I'm pretty much the best at everything. I'd show you my long jump but, y'know, legs." (Note: To get in character for their performance, all the Ryuumei members spoke to us as if their "conditions" were real.)_

_The club's bassist, lead singer, and songwriter is Mio Akiyama, who wore glasses on stage to feign nearsightedness. She describes herself as "Normal. I'm normal. I mean... I guess I like... no. Just normal." Ms. Akiyama was reluctant to discuss her collapse, but according to R.T., it was the result of an unexpected convergence of low blood sugar, post-traumatic stress disorder, hypertension, "excessive chestage", and light converging inside her brain due to the glasses._

_Third in seniority is Tsumugi Kotobuki, the club's keyboard player, who is "maybe" related to the wealthy Kotobuki family. She had clearly gained a large amount of weight for the performance, but claimed to have no regrets. "My part of the show was a labour of love. Do you like that expression? I found it in Shakespeare. He understood love so well..." (Ms. Kotobuki appears to have been referring to the play _Love's Labour's Lost_, in which the romantic subplots end indecisively.)_

_The last of the club's original four members is guitarist Yui Hirasawa, whose "disability" was blindness. "It's okay, I don't want to see stuff," she told us. "None of it matters. All I care about now is [my sister] Ui and [my boyfriend] Giita. Everybody else can go jump off a roof and try to fly. Especially boys. Are there any boys here I can punch? I can't tell unless they talk." The cause of Ms. Hirasawa's distress was unclear, and R.T.'s diagnosis of "dude cancer" did little to clarify matters._

_A recent addition to the band is rhythm guitarist Azusa Nakano. Her disguise as a foreigner was made possible by her photosensitivity, a rare condition that makes her extremely susceptible to sunburns. Ms. Nakano assured us that being "true to herself" somehow made the condition less painful._

_There is some mystery surrounding the band's possible sixth member. A backup bassist, Jun Suzuki, was present for interviews and even had a distinct "condition" like the others, but did not appear on stage. R.T.'s only comment later on was "Optical illusion. All in your minds." According to Mr. Ito, the judges had a different interpretation. "It was a brilliant concept - a little extra puzzle for those in the know to figure out. You see, only the senior students were playing Alice; the junior student, who isn't as deep into those awkward adolescent years, played the White Rabbit. But rather than make her the sole exception, they registered a nonexistent extra junior student - to play the invisible Cheshire Cat!"_

_The club's advisor, known only as "Sawa-chan", was not available for interviews. An orphan, Sawa-chan grew up on the streets of Tokyo, doing odd jobs for the Death Devil gang in return for shelter. The fighting skills she gained got her a job as a yakuza enforcer, which allowed her to pay her way through fashion design school. Unfortunately, the world of high fashion is travel-heavy, and Sawa-chan is unable to leave Japan until various court orders expire. She bides her time at Ryuumei teaching music (the best job she could think of that did not involve learning to read) and using the school's bands for live costuming practice. Her gang connections remain useful for fending off male suitors and allegations of sexual harrassment._

_What comes next for the Ryuumei light music club? They plan to continue their band, After-Tea School Time, through high school and beyond. They are already hard at work on their third album, "I Am A Pen", due to hit store shelves early next year. After graduation, they plan to go on an international tour; SentriFUJE has already agreed to open for them. We wish the band all the success their efforts merit._

* * *

Azusa put down her phone and forced her gaping mouth closed.

"See what I mean?" said Ritsu.

"Those reporters," said Azusa. "They got _everything wrong_."

"Yup. And more important, so did the judges. That prize wasn't for being disabled - it was for being artsy."

"But... that's not true either..."

"Isn't it? They knew we were faking and they liked it. Those deep meanings they found do _exist_, we just didn't put 'em there on purpose."

"And the important thing," said Mio, "is that Sawa-chan's plan didn't work. The judges didn't believe our gimmicks and feel sorry for us."

"Because they were lookin' at the wrong registration form," added Ritsu. She winked at Azusa. "You can thank me for forgettin' our real one any time."

Azusa jumped up. "So you _admit_ it now!"

"Yep. And I'm sorry. Won't happen again."

The sincerity in Ritsu's face mollified Azusa. She sat back down.

"Feel any better?" Yui asked her.

Azusa smiled. "Yeah." In fact, she had already been feeling better since the talk with Jun, and even more so after getting some tea in her system. Now, with the real reason for their prize revealed, she honestly felt... okay.

Her illusions had been shattered, but it wasn't the first time, and she doubted it would be the last. This was still her club; these were her friends. Azusa was ready to fight for them again. She wouldn't let either their laziness or her own frustration keep After-School Tea Time from being all it could be.

"It's wonderful to have an article about us," said Tsumugi (Mio having taken the opportunity to show it to her), "but was I the only one expecting something longer? Why did they do all those interviews and then give us only a paragraph each?"

Ritsu shrugged. "That's show biz. They probably didn't have much space."

"They're crazy," said Yui. "So are the judges. Do you think they caught it from each other?"

"Hey, the judges are _fine_. They're so smart they can tell _we're_ smart and don't know it!"

"...Huh?"

"Kidding. They're not crazy, though. They just have a super easy job."

"Judging, you mean?"

"Yeah. What could possibly beat tellin' other people they suck for a living? That's definitely the job I want if we don't make the big time."

"Oh, we don't need to worry about that," said Azusa, half-smiling. "After all, we're already on our _third album_."

Ritsu said, "I have no idea where they heard that from."

"Maybe they _are_ crazy," said Tsumugi. "Just look at the strange ideas they had about Ms. Sawako!"

There were a number of looks exchanged.

"Yes," said Mio. "That was pure invention."

"Total nonsense pulled out of nowhere," Ritsu agreed.

"I will personally _gut_ you in alphabetical order," added Sawako.

"Ha!" said Yui. "That's just what Sawa-chan sounds like. Who was that?"

No one answered. They were all staring at -

"SAWA-CHAN!"

"You're here!" said Tsumugi.

"You didn't jump out a window!" said Azusa, who had genuinely worried.

"_Again_ with the ninja act!" said Ritsu. "What are you, allergic to showin' up like a normal perOWWWWW! Leggo!"

Sawako released Ritsu's ear. "I dress you all up for Regionals, and this is the thanks I get? You _slander me in the media?_"

"Well, we were mad! And they didn't get your full name! Nobody lookin' you up will ever find it!"

"I will get you all back for this. Not right away. Maybe not for _years_. I'll wait patiently till the day you've completely forgotten, and on that day... POW."

The club members cowered before her. But then, one by one, they noticed something. Sawako was ripping into them, sure, but not quite like she ever had before. The difference was in her face.

She was grinning.

"Sawa-chan!" shouted Yui. "You're not fired!"

"Nope."

As one, the girls tackled her to the ground in a group hug. "Woo-hoo!" "Go Sawa-chan!" "Three cheers!"

"And the club?" Mio asked.

"Still in business!" said Sawako.

They hugged with renewed enthusiasm. In fact - "Uh, everyone? This is a bit too... too much... en..."

A few seconds passed before Ritsu said, "Anyone feel her breathing? 'Cause I don't."

The club hastily backed off. Sawako gasped. She had already turned slightly purple.

"Sorry, Sawa-chan," said Mio. "We didn't mean to celebrate by killing you."

"T-tea," was all the teacher could get out.

* * *

The club members and Sawako spent the next two hours relaxing, chatting, and enjoying their tea and treats. At long last, there was nothing hanging over their heads. They'd reached the light at the end of the tunnel.

Eventually Tsumugi and Azusa said their goodbyes and headed home. Sawako was next to go. "I need to get some sleep," she said ruefully. "Back to _work_ soon."

"Weren't you desperate to keep this job?" Mio reminded her.

"Pfft." She got up. "That doesn't mean I have to like every part of it. If teachers ever get flex-time, I'm first in line."

"So long, Sawa-chan," said Ritsu. "Good to have ya back."

She smiled. "Good to _be_ back."

"Just remember - no more boyfriends. In fact, no dating at all. From now on you're a nun."

"_Hey!_"

Mio swatted Ritsu, who said, "Kiddin'. Of course you can date. But date smarter." She winked. "Don't get fooled again."

The teacher rolled her eyes. _I'll date smarter all right,_ she thought on the way out. _The next guy isn't coming anywhere NEAR this school._

With Sawako gone, Mio's eyes fell on Yui. _Speaking of people who need to date smarter..._ "How are you holding up?" she asked.

"Me?" said Yui. "Great! But I'd better go too. Ui is probably getting worried."

"Yes, but I mean -"

"I can't wait to get home!" Yui continued, putting her coat on. "I bet Ui made something super delicious for dinner! Then I'll play Gitah for a while and have dessert and play Gitah some more and go to sleep!"

Ritsu laughed. "Simple pleasures for simple minds. We should never've been worried. What would you even do with a boyfriend?"

Yui paused. A slight, crooked smile appeared on her face.

"Hmm," she said.

"What?"

"We would've... had fun, Ricchan."

Both girls just stared at Yui as she said goodbye and left. As soon as she was through the door, Ritsu spun on Mio. "Did you hear that? 'Cause I didn't."

"Uh..."

"Not. A. Thing. Yui did not say what she just said. I dunno which one of us will be the first to grow a libido, but it's NOT her."

"Right. I agree."

"Good. Let's drink tea till we can't see stuff."

They hung out for a while longer, taking it easy. Neither of them was in any great hurry to get home. On the contrary, this restoration of normality was so satisfying they wanted it to last as long as possible.

Still... "Eventually we'll have to talk about our fight yesterday," Mio said.

"Will we? I'm cool with letting it drop."

"We said things we can't take back."

"I took mine back already. Didn't you get the memo I sent out? Here, I'll send it again." Ritsu pretended to type on her phone. "Everything... taken... back... forever. Done."

Mio had to smile. She sat back in her chair, as did Ritsu, and the two of them took a good long look at each other.

_Someday,_ thought Mio... _someday I'll turn you around._

_I wasn't wrong; you do drag me down to your level. But that's a two-way street. I'll lift you up. I'll MAKE you the friend I deserve - the person you deserve to be._

_You can grow up. Me too. We'll do it together._

And as Ritsu looked back at her friend, she thought, _One of these days I'll get you to loosen up. I mean, who can actually be comfortable with a whole tree up her butt?_

"C'mon," said the drummer. "Let's go home."

* * *

**Four Months Later**

The term was over. Aside from a little incident with Yui catching cold and then forgetting her guitar right before the concert, the light music club had made it through successfully. Tests were over. Most of the students were now home, taking a break and resting up for next term. Teachers, too, had little to do; the school was almost empty.

But not far away, at a bar - a different one from last time - three Sakuragaoka teachers had assembled.

"When will we three meet again, in thunder, lightning, or in rain?" asked Sawako.

Kawasumi rolled her eyes. "You can be a witch if you want, but count me out."

"Sorry. But it's true, isn't it? Who knows when we'll all be together again."

"It's going to be strange without you, Chika," said Yamasu. "You've been here even longer than I have."

Kawasumi nodded. It was going to be strange for her too - even though these two had only been nodding acquaintances of hers until quite recently. "I may end up coming back. This is just something I have to do."

"What's the plan exactly?"

"I'm going back to my home town. It's just a start, but there were things I left unfinished there. There are... classmates I need to see again."

"Classmates?" asked Sawako.

"Friends," Kawasumi admitted. "Who deserved better from me than I gave them."

"Well, best of luck. I'll keep your classroom warm for you."

Kawasumi raised an eyebrow. "_You're_ taking over my homeroom?"

"Yep! It'll be my first time having one. The principal said there was a position open, and I decided to apply for it. I felt like it was time to take the next step in my career."

She smiled knowingly. "You felt like it was time to get _paid_ more."

"Oh, is there a raise involved? News to me." All three women chuckled.

"So you see this as a career?" asked Yamasu. "Not out to marry money anymore?"

"Please. The career is to keep me busy _until_ I marry money. Preferably real money this time."

Both teachers nodded, getting the reference. "What ever happened to that guy, anyway?" Kawasumi asked.

"Dead."

They stared.

"What? I _told_ you I wanted to kill him. Tracked him down, kept him in a warehouse for a few days of quality time, then hit him with a shovel and left him out in the woods. It's bear season. He won't be back."

There was silence.

"...is what I'd _like_ to say," concluded Sawako. "Come on, you didn't believe me, did you?"

Both teachers let out a breath. "We had to wonder," said Yamasu. "You were very detailed."

"I did _picture_ it a lot. No, I just ignored the bastard until he stopped calling. Maybe he found some other girl. Maybe not. Maybe he really _did_ die. Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn."

Yamasu clinked her glass against Sawako's. "I'm happy for you. And if you can actually take satisfaction from this godawful job, I'm happy for that too."

Sawako shook her head. "I will never get you."

"Huh?"

"How can someone who hates the job so much be so _good_ at it?"

Yamasu slammed her glass down. "Take that back!"

"She's right, you know," said Kawasumi. "I've been wondering too."

"No you haven't! There's nothing to wonder about!"

"Oh no?" said Sawako. "I think Jun Suzuki would disagree. You could have just ignored her when she was doing that spy thing, but not only did you let her bother you on a daily basis, you stepped in personally when she took it too far."

"But -"

"And that jazz club. You've had nothing but bad things to say about them - to _us_. But Jun says you never take it out on them. And didn't you eventually train them well enough to compete?"

"The principal made me! And they only came in third!"

"Out of _ten_. They didn't just walk into that."

Kawasumi added, "I'm in the office sometimes when you talk to students. You should hear yourself - you're good at it. You never have to be reminded what their troubles are, and you give them good advice."

"I - I drink!" Yamasu protested. "I drink like a chimney!"

Sawako shrugged. "Nobody said you were _perfect_."

"Dammit! Look... I _used_ to want this job. But that was before I experienced it! Teaching is just something I settle for now. It's not my _destiny_ or something!"

Kawasumi smiled. "Funny thing about destiny... you don't get to choose it."

"Why does this bother you so much?" asked Sawako. "You might as well be good at your job, right?"

"No! No! I want to be good at teaching _real_ musicians!"

"Maybe you are. This is what real musicians sound like in high school."

"It's not what _I_ sounded like!"

Sawako raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure?"

"What?"

"Look, most people don't know this, but I used to be in a heavy metal ba-"

"We know," said Kawasumi. "When you got drunk that time, you recited half the lyrics from your first album to show us you still knew them."

"We _believed_ you," added Yamasu. "God, my head hurts just thinking about it."

Sawako glared at them both. "Well, keep it to yourselves. Anyway, we really got into the whole bit. We were Death Devil, I was Catherine... you should've seen my hair. And we were the hardest-rocking metal band Tokyo had ever seen! We were an unstoppable noise machine! We were _gods_!"

"You told us that too."

"Uh huh. And then a while later I went back and listened to some of our music again."

"...And?"

"I was too embarrassed to get through it all. We were _awful_." She sighed. "Back when I was in the middle of it, my ears couldn't tell the difference between us and Metallica. We were having so much fun we _had_ to be the best. But I know the truth now. At a few years' distance, everything is... smaller than I remembered."

Kawasumi nodded. It was the same reason she was going home. All those years ago, her shame and disappointment had been like forces of nature, overwhelming her whole life. But now, although she still felt them... they were just feelings. She didn't have to let them control her anymore.

She hoped and prayed - as did Sawako - that Tsumugi would feel the same way in time.

"Do you still have any recordings from when you were in high school?" Sawako asked Yamasu.

"...We made a tape once," she admitted.

"I bet you haven't listened to it in a while. You should. I guarantee it won't sound like you remember."

"Ugh. If you're right, that's just going to depress me." She took a swig of beer.

"Yep. So here's what to do afterwards. Are you still in touch with your old bandmates?"

"Some of them."

"Look 'em up. My friends from Death Devil have gone different ways in life. Some of them don't play anymore. But the ones who _do_... when they play clubs, I always try to make it."

Yamasu looked skeptical. "They're good?"

"They _rock_. And not in spite of Death Devil, because of it! I can hear our sound in there every time. It's just grown to maturity. I bet you'll find the same thing."

"Well..."

"Sawako's right," said Kawasumi. "High school is high school. You're never going to come in and find a class full of Thelonius Minks."

"Monks."

"Whatever. But if you really do want to help kids discover their love of music, you're in the right place. And you're good at it, like it or not."

Yamasu stared into her glass.

"Embraaaaaace your destinyyyy," said Sawako. "Embraaaaace it. Woooooooo..."

"Oh, fine! I'll think about it." Yamasu closed her eyes, rolled them, and -

Kawasumi said, "You know we can all tell when you're doing that, right?"

"WHAT?"

* * *

The school was _almost_ empty. But one or two clubs had come to squeeze in one last practice.

In theory.

"I'm not wearing it!" said Mio, hiding under the table.

"Aw, c'mon. Are you gonna let Sawa-chan's hard work go to waste?"

"She didn't make that thing!"

Ritsu shrugged. "Yeah, okay, it was a discount Hallowe'en costume. But it did cost me five bucks."

"_This_ is what you borrowed the five bucks for?" Mio clawed out at Ritsu.

"I think you'll look great in it!" said Tsumugi.

"Pirates are fun!" Yui agreed. "Arrr!"

"This is an _adult_ pirate costume!" said Mio. "It's almost bikini-size! It actually says 'Booty Pirate' on the label!"

"So? There were girl pirates." Yui turned to Azusa. "There were girl pirates, right?"

"I'm not sure," said Azusa. "Maybe a few, but I wouldn't put money on -"

"That doesn't matter!" Mio interrupted. "Even if there were girl pirates, _which there weren't_, they didn't dress like this! No one with any self-respect would!"

"Unless it was about empowerment," Ritsu suggested. "It's like you're saying, 'I _know_ I'm hot and you're still not gettin' any.' "

"Exactly! None of you are getting any! Of anything! EVER!"

Ritsu whispered to Tsumugi, "I'm not sure she knows what that means."

"What _does_ it mean?" Tsumugi whispered back.

"Oh, you'll know when she's wearin' it."

With that, Tsumugi was fully on board. "Come on! Let's turn this table over!"

"Nooo!" Mio grabbed onto its legs, but couldn't stop her bandmates from upsetting the table (spilling everything on top, of course). She made a break for it, but Ritsu was too fast. Pinned down, she could only struggle uselessly as the other members started taking off her -

"Ahem."

Everyone looked up. The principal was in the doorway.

Ritsu shifted off Mio. The others released her. Everyone tried to look as casual as possible.

It wasn't working. The principal was still staring, stunned at the scenario he'd walked in on: four club members dogpiled on the fifth, pulling her clothes off.

Self-awareness suddenly swept over Mio. She looked down. She was already in her underwear... and the principal was still there... staring _right at -_

"AAAAAAAA!"

* * *

A moment later, Mio was standing over the unconscious principal, gasping for breath. The others stared in amazement. Ritsu snuck a picture with her phone, but no one dared to speak. It was Azusa who finally broke the silence.

"Well," she said, "I guess we're going to find out if that amnesia thing works."

**THE END**

* * *

[A/N: Ladies, gentlemen... it is DONE. What was meant to be a short, goofy story turned into a three-year project, but now it's finally over. Be here in a week or so for the afterword and omake, in which, among many other things, the "true identities" of two of the OCs will be revealed! (Reviewers are welcome to guess...)]


End file.
